This collection of too-weird-not-to-be-true stories gives the freakish details behind odd curiosities, from unusual drug side effects to the Alien Hand Syndrome--a disorder wherein a person's hand develops a will of its own.

    Brings together three hilarious pieces by America's comic genius: Without Feathers, a secret journal that addresses life's "big" questions; Getting Even, Woody as psychologist, historian, and philosopher; and Side Effects, Woody's take on UFOs and more.

    . . with Tom Clancy as your guide. UPDATED WITH NEW MATERIALS AND PHOTOS!

    In Why Fish Fart and Other Useless (or Gross) Information About the World, Francesca Gould sifts through the world's most unpleasant creatures, diseases, physical deformities, culinary delicacies, ritual practices, and hideous torture tactics to uncover every horrifying and stomach-turning fact under the sun. This book is full of questions you never thought to ask?and perhaps will wish you?d never had answered?including:?What exactly is maggot cheese? ?How did anal hair help to lead to the conviction of the Great ?Train Robbers? ?What is the job of a ?fart catcher How exactly do ?crabs? cause such intense itching around one's private parts? ?The real story behind why the toilet is often referred to as ?the john.? ?Why you might want to steer clear of some coffees. (Hint: If poo isn't exactly your idea of appetizing . . .)Why Fish Fart and Other Useless (or Gross) Information About the World is sure to delight any and all hard-core fans of the obscure, esoteric, and?last but not least?grotesque.

    These reanimated corpses survive by draining and consuming the blood of the living, and their threat to humanity cannot be ignored. Throughout the centuries, professors and peasants have offered their own vampire-fighting tips, but these were often old wives' tales, based more on superstition than on fact. Here, for the first time, is a comprehensive vampire-fighting guide for the twenty-first century. In the tradition of bestsellers like The Zombie Survival Guide and The Zen of Zombie, The Vampire Survival Guide covers everything you need to know to protect yourself from vampires. Topics include the habits and routines of vampires, how to tell if somebody you know has become a vampire, how to protect yourself from attack, how to set traps, what to do if you must fight off multiple vampires, how to cleanse an entire town after devastating vampiric attacks, and much more. It confronts head-on the most terrifying situation of all—that of being bitten by a vampire—by providing the reader with numerous approaches, rooted in both science and medicine and religion, for fighting off blood-suckers before it is too late. Vampires are found in every country in the world—not just in Eastern Europe and Sunnydale, California. With the human population expected to reach over 9 billion by the year 2050, confrontations between men, women, children, and vampires are increasingly inevitable. This guide is the human race's best hope.

    Have a read.

    and I am wide awake because the man of the house has decided that he needs to perform a series of complex manoeuvres that involve him balancing on his left elbow. When I fell asleep last night, there was a baby lying next to me. Her smelly diaper is still wedged on my head but aside from this rather damp clue, I can't seem to find her anywhere. I could ask my mother-in-law if she has seen the baby, but she may just tell me that I need to fast on alternate Mondays, and God will deliver the baby back to me . . . Full of wit and delicious observations, Mrs Funnybones captures the life of the modern Indian woman—a woman who organizes dinner each evening, even as she goes to work all day, who runs her own life but has to listen to her Mummyji, who worries about her weight and the state of the country. Based on Twinkle Khanna’s super-hit column, Mrs Funnybones marks the debut of one of our funniest, most original voices.

    But believe me: in this book, I’ll let you know exactly how to become a master spy just like me. Obviously, you won’t be as good at it as I am, but that’s because you’re you, and I’m Sterling Archer. I know, I know, it sucks not being me. But don’t beat yourself up about it, because I’m going to show you all the good stuff—what to wear; what to drink; how to seduce women (and, when necessary, men); how to beat up men (and, when necessary, women); how to tell the difference between call girls and hookers (hint: when they’re dead, they’re just hookers) and everything about weapons, secret devices, lying ex-girlfriends, and turtlenecks. In a word? How to Archer.

    Wit and repartee permeate his work — from the short, light pieces to his great novel Adventures of Huckleberry Finn and even later, in dark meditations on the human condition where his humor takes on a cynical, satirical twist.This remarkably inexpensive volume gathers together hundreds of Twain's most memorable quips and comments on life, love, history, culture, travel, and a diversity of other topics that occupied his thoughts over 50 years of writing and lecturing.An invaluable, ready reference for writers, speakers, and others in search of amusing and insightful quotes, this entertaining and thought-provoking compilation is also an ideal introduction to Twain's inimitable style and thought.

    With its innovative visual take on trivia, pop culture, and strange-but-true tales, this volume is an exciting, original and hilarious look at humans and the world theyve created.DK

    Mangled Moments of Western Civilization from Term Papers & Blue Book Exams Did You Know:Cesar was assassinated on the Yikes of March when he is reported to have said, "Me too, Brutus!"Stalin, Roosevelt, Churchill, and Truman were known as the "Big Three"Rasputin was a pheasant by birthJudyism had one big God named YahooWestward expansion ended at Custard's Last StandMarie Curie won the Noel Prize for inventing the radiatorThe Civil Rights movement turned the corner with Martin Luther Junior's famous "If I Had a Hammer" speech

    Curious to find out:what to wear to a Fetish Ball?the difference between "sticky green" and "backyard boogie?"which piercing has the worst pain factor?how to find the best bookie?Find out the answers to these questions and many more as Etiquette for Outlaws teaches you how to live it up in style with tips on:TattoosGraffitiMotorcyclesSuicideGamblingStrip ClubsAlternative SexDrinkingSwingingJailhouse FightingGangsPiercing

    Mark Bittman, the bestselling, award-winning author of How to Cook Everything , shows you how to make a good burger or delicious pasta for everyday meals as well as chicken soup on a cold day, lasagne because you love it, and prime rib for company. Not only will you make some of the best food you ve ever eaten, you ll save money and eat more healthfully, too.Anyone can cookSimple, satisfying recipes with easy-to-follow directionsTips to help you shop for, prepare, and cook the recipesRecipe variations and lists of ideas to adapt dishes to your tasteStep-by-step illustrations for tricky techniques like mincing garlicSimple. Straightforward.Just what you need to cook well."

    For more than 33 million viewers, the Emmy Award-winning television show has become a Thursday night ritual. Even though the show has ended, Jerry Seinfeld's distinct brand of humor can still be yours.In his #1 New York Times bestselling book, SeinLanguage, Jerry Seinfeld has captured on the page his views on topics ranging from Raisinettes to relationships, from childhood to cop shows, and from parents to power suits. This must-have book for all fans--and who isn't a fan?--remains available in both paperback and hardcover.

    Includes "Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim, Live at Carnegie Hall, Me Talk Pretty One Day, Naked, Holidays on Ice," and "Barrel Fever and Other Stories." Abridged. 20 CDs.