5ive Speed


Charley Warady - 2011
    Time to move up.When Donald was a kid in the late 60's on the South Side of Chicago, he had a Schwinn Sting Ray bike. Everyone did. But everyone else had a five-speed. Donald's was a three-speed. It was good enough, as was explained by his parents, just as their Ford Maverick wasn't the neighbor's Le Mans, but it was good enough. And that's the way Donald was taught to live his life. It was a three-speed life. It was good enough. He marries Emily because she's good enough. Emily marries Donald because that's what she had planned, and she is not going to experience divorce as did her parents. Donald opens a law practice with his two best friends and roommates from college because it's good enough.Then the Roths meet their son's future in-laws and everything changes. Donald wonders if, in fact, he could get that five-speed.In this hilarious and thought-provoking novel, the whole concept of morals and convention is turned inside out. Everything is perception. If you like Richard Russo, Tom Perotta, and Jonathan Franzen, you're going to love this book.

The Ugly Side of Me


Nikita Lynnette Nichols - 2015
    It was lust at first sight, and Rhapsody isn't going to let young Malcolm leave her presence without a promise to fulfill her fantasy.Malcolm had no idea when he accepted Rhapsody's invitation to her bedroom that he was selling his soul to the devil. Malcolm thinks he can bed Rhapsody and simply walk away, but she is not one to settle for a one night stand. Rhapsody goes to desperate measures to keep her cub extremely close to her. Gifting Malcolm a very expensive SUV, filling his belly with home cooked meals and funding a trip to Cancun are just a few of the tactics that Rhapsody uses to ensure that Malcolm spends his nights in her bed and no one else's. However, when Rhapsody finds a mysterious package on her doorstep containing proof of Malcolm's betrayal and deception, she seeks revenge and seals her own fate.

Peace on Earth: An Irma Saves Christmas Novella


Maia Ross - 2019
    Surrounded by seasonal joy - and way too many stuffed Yuletide beavers - at the island house her family has owned for generations, she's all set for the perfect holiday.But when a young friend asks for help with figuring out a financial snafu, her perfect day is in jeopardy. Can Irma - a woman with a yen for strong tea, cardio, and a well-oiled gun - find a thief before the festive season kicks off, or will Christmas be ruined?Peace on Earth is a 30,000 word holiday novella, and is the first book in the forthcoming Beaver Island Mystery series.

The Big Book of Dumb White Husband


Benjamin Wallace - 2012
    He's confronted the HOA. He's even taken on Santa himself. He doesn't usually win. These are the tales of the Dumb White Husband and they are all available here in this collected edition.This handsome volume includes:Dumb White Husband vs. the Grocery Store - John would rather sit and watch the game, but his wife needs some things at the store. Can he complete the list and get back in time to see the end of the game?Dumb White Husband vs. Halloween - Every Halloween, Chris has the scariest house on the block and gives out the best candy. But, this year, someone is showing him up and he'll stop at nothing to find out who.Dumb White Husband vs. Santa - Erik has planned the perfect Christmas for his family. The plan is foolproof, bulletproof and flame retardant. Nothing can undo the hours of planning and preparation. Nothing except maybe odd-shaped packages, ill-timed fruitcakes or an errant neighborhood Santa Claus.Dumb White Husband vs. the Tooth Fairy - Erik always has a plan and he's sure he would have figured out the whole Tooth Fairy thing eventually. But, when his three-year-old son takes a frisbee to the mouth, he's forced to speed things up. Between neighborhood kids with big mouths and unhelpful dentists he's going to need to improvise. Will he bend to the pressure of inflation? Will he get caught in the act? And, what do you do with those teeth anyway?Dumb White Husband for President (A novella) - There comes a time in every man's life when he must stand for the things he believes in. John doesn't believe in bagging his grass. So, when a new allergy-prone neighbor gets the HOA to require it, there's only one thing he can do - run for President of The Creeks of Sage Valley Phase II.John, Chris and Erik put aside most of their differences to run a campaign that they hope will see John elected as President and end the meddling of the rule-loving new kid on the block. Will they succeed? It's doubtful.

Vernon House


Sandra Farris - 2014
    She wanted this old Victorian for herself. The rumors the house was haunted didn’t bother Jennifer, who is a skeptic by nature. But her skepticism turns to intrigue when she finds a letter dated 1909 in the attic tucked into the folds of a wedding dress. The letter mentions a murder, but no name of the victim and is signed with only initials. Jennifer's challenge is to track down the identity of the victim, as well as the killer. However, her research brings forth two spirits, one of which is evil.

The Junket (Kindle Single)


Mike Albo - 2011
    He lands an enviable gig writing about shopping and fashion for the city’s major newspaper, but an ill-fated promotional junket gets Albo into hot water. He becomes a gossip item and finds himself caught in an acrimonious war between Old and New Media. Here's a gimlet-eyed account of the back-biting media scene, a glimpse into the inner workings of the fashion crowd, and a candid portrait of what it takes to survive as a writer in today’s chattering and watchful New York City."I was perilously close to exposing a secret underground economy of promotion: favors and junkets and banquets and gifts that keeps the city in motion, and keeps underpaid writers at work. Basically, I became the Silkwood of Swag."

Crazy True Tales - A funny book for adults: Anecdotes and hilarious true stories. For the coffee table, bathroom or as a conversation starter (Crazy True Stories and Anecdotes)


Adam Douglas - 2021
    

King Henry and the Three Little Trips (The King Henry Tapes)


Richard Raley - 2016
    Telling three interconnected stories taking place on the same day, two weeks after events in "The Foul Mouth and the Mancy Martial Artist" this novel is a can't miss for fans of THE KING HENRY TAPES. Spending equal time with Tyson Bonnie, Eva Reti, and King Henry Price himself, KING HENRY AND THE THREE LITTLE TRIPS shows the fallout from the Days of Supernatural Exhibit in both the personal cost for our characters and the political cost for supernatural organizations worldwide as fear of the Curator spreads to even the Asylum itself. Read as Tyson Bonnie escorts Vicky Welf to the Coyote Nation compound, find out if Eva Reti can survive the anima experiment inflicted upon her, and follow King Henry as he returns to the Asylum seeking Plutarch's help. The queue for the "Foul Mouth and the Pit of No Return" roller-coaster begins here! THE KING HENRY TAPES Book 1 - "The Foul Mouth and the Fanged Lady" (released) Book 2 - "The Foul Mouth and the Cat Killing Coyotes" (released) Book 3 - "The Foul Mouth and the Troubled Boomworm" (released) Book 4 - "The Foul Mouth and the Headless Hunny" (released) Book 5 - "The Foul Mouth and the Mancy Martial Artist" (released) Book 5.5 - "King Henry and the Three Little Trips" (released) Book 6 - "The Foul Mouth and the Pit of No Return" (forthcoming)

Midlife Happy Hour: Our Reward for Surviving Careers, Kids, and Chaos (Midlife Cabernet Book 2)


Elaine Ambrose - 2016
    Elaine Ambrose boldly writes her latest kiss-my-attitude book as a sassy sequel to Midlife Cabernet. Ambrose shares her festive life experiences and career-crushing anecdotes as she explains how to remain relevant after age 50, why grown children make great travel companions, and how to balance midlife without falling over. Ambrose notes that her feminine mystique sprung a leak after years of competing as a funny female in a serious male job market. Now the hard work is done, and she invites midlife women to join her for Happy Hour.

Return to Cedar Hill


Jacie Middlemann - 2013
    The city nestled along the Mighty Mississippi. She returns to Burlington. The solitude she desires as she restores her grandmother's small house isn't turning out to be all she hoped for. Before she knows it her cousin Casey is at the door desperate to find refuge from a high pressure job she can no longer sell her soul for. Together the two discover long hidden answers to old family mysteries as they also seek the answers to the sudden changes in their lives. But it is Mary's unanticipated ownership of the family ancestral white elephant that brings family members unexpectedly to her door in the middle of the night. Before long, the small house is once again crowded with family. From her Aunt Charlie who longs to be free of the cloistering concern of her grown children to nineteen year old Mallie who dreams of something different than what her parents dream of for her. Return to Cedar Hill, first in the Hills of Burlington books, brings six women together, family and friends, each at a crossroad in their lives, and searching for something they've not yet found.

Only When the Sun Shines Brightly


Magnus Mills - 1999
    The wind tries first, but however hard it blows it fails to make any progress because the traveller simply buttons his coat even tighter than before. Only when the sun shines brightly does he finally remove it, and the wind roars away in a bad temper.

Upon an Old Wall Dreaming: More of My Favourite Stories and Sketches


Ruskin Bond - 2016
    His signature style is simplicity itself, but the themes he tackles are big, deep and universal—love, loss, happiness, grief, and all the shades of emotion in between. These are stories of city and small town, mountain and lowland, and of life lived slowly and lightly. For over fifty years, these tales have charmed and beguiled several generations of readers. Last year, Ruskin Bond made a selection of his favourite stories (from the several hundred that he has written) that were published in a book entitled A Gathering of Friends. It proved to be enormously popular, selling out in a matter of weeks. Encouraged by its success, the author has made a further selection of his favourite stories and non-fiction sketches, leavening the mix with several pieces that have never been published before. It is a collection that will burnish his reputation as one of the world’s great storytellers.

Collecting


Miranda Wilson - 2013
    He collects tiny morsels from London’s pavements, parks and gutters and exhibits them at home. Finds include a grape pip, a ball bearing and the wing of a flying ant. When his irritating son, troubled daughter-in-law and much loved baby granddaughter come to stay, a sequence of events lead to Walter being thrust into London’s East End art scene. His son thinks he’s out of control, but his daughter-in-law has found a kindred spirit and Walter discovers more joy and pain than he ever thought possible at his age. This is a book about self discovery that explores how we all are capable of things we may previously have thought unimaginable.

Whiskey Devil


Christian Galacar - 2013
    His father is an abusive drunk with muddled religious views, and his mother, as hard as she tries to defend her son, only ever ends up delaying the inevitable. Things take a turn for the worse one Friday when Bobby brings home a black eye from school. The following day his father brings him out into the woods on a mission to do “God’s Work” and bring him into adulthood. A coming-of-age story about the sins of a father and a son’s chance to absolve himself from them.

Gary's Children (Shingles Book 2)


Rick Gualtieri - 2018
    Gary Handler has issues. His boss hates him, his mother hounds him, and his cat thinks he’s an idiot. But that’s okay because Gary’s got the perfect solution to all of life’s troubles: a porn site subscription and his right hand.Sadly, all habits grow old, even the fun ones. Gary soon finds himself at the doorstep of a creepy old pawn shop where he buys a used adult novelty toy to spice up his one-man sex life.Pity for him that it’s cursed by the angry spirits of all the “kids” he’s flushed down the toilet. Needless to say, hairy palms are about to become the least of his worries.----------Jack on, jack off ... with the Jacklight in book 2 of Shingles, the horror comedy series that’s not for those with faint hearts or weak bladders.