Now Exeter is set to become the UK Capital of Culture and the ambitious Lord Mayor wants to turn things around. But when a young man's (dead) body is found in the centre of town, things get murky.Detective Roger LeCarre is a character never seen before in modern fiction - a tough but troubled detective with a drink problem and a marriage in trouble. Can he find out who killed the young man, save the city and change his energy provider before the new more expensive tariff kicks in?Filled with drama, eroticism and very specific Wikipedia-sourced information on Devon, Once Upon A Crime is a thriller which demands to be read.

    

    Unfortunately, that was before two dudes wielding high-tech gadgets made off with both his kegs and his brother. Now Clyde has to hunt down his sibling with only his most trusted lackey along to help. Will he manage to recover both his beer and Dougie? Will they survive the night as they unveil the mysterious secret of the kidnappers? Will the Earth be destroyed thanks to their bumbling incompetence? Probably that last one, but you’ll have to read it to find out.

    Dora Loveday is a harassed mother of four kids, grappling with a crazy menagerie of pets, an impervious and obstinate husband, and a relentless bombardment of trials and tribulations that would test a saint. In this wonderful sequel, this book does not fail to deliver a fabulous read, just as funny as the first.

    Meet the man who vacuums bewildered prairie dogs out of their burrows; a frustrated werewolf who roams the streets of Soho getting mistaken for Brian Blessed; a smug carbon-neutral eco-couple; a teenage girl who invites 45,000 MySpace friends to a house party; the author of a business book entitled Highly Successful Secrets to Standing on a Corner Holding Up a Golf Sale Sign and a man whose attempts to teach softball to a group of indolent British advertising executives sparks an international crisis.

    Monsarrat follows the great captains and naval adventurers from the Artic to the South Pacific. Lawe represents the spirit of maritime exploration and fortitude; his life is the thread stringing together a long history of nautical adventure.He finds himself mixed up with Drake and the Armada; sailing with Hudson in search of the North-West passage; a buccaneer under Sir Henry Morgan in the Caribbean; assisting Samuel Pepys with his responsibilities as Secretary to the Navy; at the side of Captain Cook as he transports General Wolf to the storming of Quebec, and then on to his death in the Pacific; serving in Nelson’s household and then to the Nile, Naples and Trafalgar; working on a slaver from Liverpool to the Caribbean; press-ganged aboard the Shannon just before her duel with the American Chesapeake, exploring the Artic with Sir John Franklin; fighting in both world wars, including the action at Zebrugge and ‘D’ Day; before a final test with a tanker catching fire after the opening of the St.Lawrence Seaway – and much more besides!Under sail and steam, as Mathew’s eternal existence progresses, the action-packed novel is both highly entertaining and instructive and has been widely acclaimed as a masterpiece. Some fourteen true maps, along with other diagrams, are included, and what was originally two volumes is supplied as one. ‘… this huge, action packed volume can be recommended to anyone’ – Sunday Times‘He has never written anything to compare with this work – it is a masterstroke’ – Manchester Evening News‘No one can bring alive the cruel sea and the valiant men who have sailed on it through all the generations like Monsarrat’ – Daily Mail‘This is Monsarrat, master storyteller, running proud’ – The ScotsmanNote: Nicholas Monsarrat died before Book II was finished. Anne Monsarrat completed the remainder of the story in Nicholas's own words, partly from some working notes he left and partly from his original synopsis of The Master Mariner Book II. Both are included here.

    Never in my wildest imaginings did I expect it would happen when I was on all fours vomiting my guts out beside a sugar cane field in far north Queensland on Mother’s Day.” And so begins another brilliantly funny instalment in the true and chaotic life of middle-aged stand up comic, Denise Scott. This time Denise is on tour through the back blocks and remote country towns of regional Australia with a bunch of young male comics on a tiny bus… Although old enough to be their mother, Denise in true form manages to keep up with the partying and outrageous behaviour (and many times leading it) on tour. However, although that tiny bus took her many miles away from her real life, life has a habit of catching up with you. It was mid journey on those long, long stretches of empty road that Denise confronts her own issues of ageing, motherhood, sex, intimacy, regret, and wearing your bathing suit in public.

    She's got problems though when bits of her ex-husband turn up in different places and the slimy DI Savage seems to be bending the evidence to link her to the death. Add the fact that she's being pressured into taking a ‘job’ by hard-nosed Vera Devlin from the estate and having to work in a topless bar to make ends meet and you can see she's up against it. Desperate to extricate herself from the mess she breaks into her old marital home to find the diary of her dead husband, except that his mother has taken up residence and arrives back early from bingo… Set against a backdrop of Northern council estate life, this fast paced, humorous novel exemplifies the problems caused by poverty, piles and unruly children, think Jeremy Kyle meets the Thorn Birds and you won't be far wrong!

    After all, what’s he going to be able to do about it? He’s just this guy, stuck in a small town, pinned there by a load of student debt and a stalled writing career. Oh, and a wicked case of writer’s block.Or at least he was, until a dragon showed up in his bedroom. At midnight. Quoting Freud and muttering about the space-time continuum.So of course, Ian must Make a Choice and decide whether he wants to follow the dragon back into the Connectome and find his muse again, or stay in a house that surely wants to kill him, one repair bill at a time.Follow Ian on a rollicking adventure, where he finds out that he can make a difference. And that some things are worth fighting for.Even if all you have is a can opener.

    He has, however, been a disappointment to his family in several ways: In appearance he is insignificant looking both in face and figure; he went to the University of Florida instead of Harvard where his forbears had been mainstays of the varsity crew for generations, and he studied agriculture instead of pointing himself toward a career in banking, bonds, or law. To say the least he is not apparently the stuff from which heroes are fashioned.As an agricultural expert specializing in fruit farming, Arthur becomes a Peace Corps volunteer and is assigned to the Republic of San Marco in the Caribbean. This weak-chinned Don Quixote soon acquires his Sancho Panza in the person of a rascally eleven-year-old boy, Pepe, who makes a bargain to be paid 400 pesos each time he saves Arthur's life. (The payments mount alarmingly!)The island's dictator thinks he can use Arthur to obtain military supplies with which to wipe out the band of guerillas in the hills who oppose his corrupt dictatorship. Failing in this the dictator decides to murder Goodpasture and cause an international incident by blaming it on the guerillas. This, he reasons, will bring the U.S. in to help stamp out the rebels.This plan also backfires (with Pepe's help, of course) and Goodpasture is taken prisoner and when they see he is a harmless eccentric he is appointed chief cook for the guerillas. From then on Arthur's life becomes a series of misadventures through which he moves serenely and from which he generally emerges unscathed (again with Pepe's assistance) until he surprisingly finds himself the guerillas' leader.Following one of the funniest bloodless revolutions imaginable Arthur Peabody Goodpasture ends up as Arthur el Gavilan, the new dictator of San Marco. "His strength was as the strength of ten because his heart was pure."

    Wake his kid brother Andy up, get tormented on the school bus by the cool kids, try to avoid them while in school. Except it's Field Trip Day to the Science Museum, and now he's stuck with the meanest kids in seventh grade all day! But then the bus breaks down, so he doesn't even get to do anything cool at the science museum. It's okay, because an industrial accident brings science to Todd and his friends in the form of a zombie apocalypse. When the bus driver abandons them in the middle of a zombie outbreak, Todd, his brother Andy, his best friend Tarik, and their tomboy friend Mikayla take shelter in the first place they can find - an adult novelty store. What can you find in an adult toy store to fight zombies? Well…let's just say that the field trip was pretty educational, even if the kids never made it to the museum! Shingles is the comedy horror series from the gang that brings you the Authors & Dragons podcast. Like the podcast, these books are rated Not Safe For Anything.

    Then got out of bed and had a brisk rub down with the pumice stone. I opened the curtains and saw that the sun was shining brightly. (A suspicion is growing in my mind that the BBC is not to be trusted.)Margaret Hilda Roberts is a rather ambitious 14 � year old grocer's daughter from Grantham. She can't abide laziness, finds four hours of chemistry homework delightful and believes she is of royal birth - or at least destined for great things. But Margaret knows that good things never come to those who wait . . .These are the secret diary entries of a girl born into an ordinary life, yet who might just go on to become something really rather extraordinary, and she is brilliantly brought vividly to life by bestselling author Sue Townsend, Britain's favourite comic writer for over three decades.'Essential reading for Mole followers' Times Educational Supplement'Wonderfully funny and sharp as knives' Sunday TimesSue Townsend is Britain's favourite comic author. Her hugely successful novels include eight Adrian Mole books, The Public Confessions of a Middle-Aged Woman (Aged 55�), Number Ten, Ghost Children, The Queen and I, Queen Camilla and The Woman Who Went to Bed For a Year, all of which are highly acclaimed bestsellers. She has also written numerous well-received plays. She lives in Leicester, where she was born and grew up.

    He thought his only career choice would be a life of crime. Fifteen years later, he was one of Britain's most successful comics, playing live to half a million fans a year as Roy 'Chubby' Brown.COMMON AS MUCK! tells an incredible story of hardships, heartbreak and, ultimately, success. From an impoverished childhood with his abusive father, to his brand of comedy too rude for television and his determined fight against throat cancer, COMMON AS MUCK! is a frank telling of a remarkable life, laced with Roy's irrepressible humour.

    The result was a classic column full of Bombecks signature wit and warmth. Now the beloved column that has hung on hundreds of refrigerator doors has been cheerily illustrated and designed as a handsome gift book, Eat Less Cottage and More Ice Cream. In it, Bombeck gently reminds us of what is really important in life: If I had my life to live over again I would have waxed less and listened more.I would have cried and laughed less while watching television . . . and more while watching real life.But mostly, given another shot at life, I would seize every minute of it . . . look at it and really see it . . . try it on . . . live it . . . exhaust it . . . and never give that minute back until there was nothing left of it. . . . Long-time fans of Erma Bombeck will be thrilled to have this favorite column in the form of a beautiful keepsake. Readers discovering Bombeck for the first time will become fans instantly. Eat Less Cottage and More Ice Cream offers wisdom to inspire all of us.

    Another super collection of naughty and not-so-naughty jokes, humorous anecdotes, comic interludes, hilarious situations and bitchy remarks, selected by Khushwant Singh from amongst the thousands contributed by his readers and fans - and some manufactured by him.