(Brought to you by the famed Dweezel and Pallie.)"[A] funny and clever little book... I like this version even better than the original story."Chytach18, Reviewer for OnlineBookClub.org"An amazing story, and hilariously funny to boot, perfect for kids and adults alike!"Angela, Amazon UK reader"It made me laugh. Grossed me out. Then makes you laugh some more."Thelma Coots, Amazon reader"One word : FUNNY! A new way of reading Snow White"Isienie V., Amazon reader*****Take your expectations for a fairy tale and throw them out the window! A noble prince? Lame. A humble princess? What a loser! A happy ending? You wish. This eBook is way better than all that. It will make you giggle, laugh, and ask for more. Either that, or it will make you scream for it all to stop. The only way to know is to read it. Download "Lily White and the Horrible Dwarves" now!The Funny Stories for Kids series, written/recorded by Dr. Dexter Dweezel and Professor Parnassus Pallie, is an ongoing effort to make fairy tales less crappy. "Lily White and the Horrible Dwarves" is the first in this series, with more to come.**Note: This story is not for babies. It can be crude, and has jokes about butts, poo, and drunk people. It also has a bit of cartoony violence. There is no swearing or sexual activity. If this story had a MPGG rating it would probably be PG, and would be comparable to a modern episode of the Simpsons.**

    More specifically, she sees ghosts as a private investigator, working alongside the Chicago Police Department to put away killers and put troubled spirits to rest.When the daughter of one of Chicago's wealthiest families turns up dead, Samantha and her assistant Mark team up with homicide detective Lance MacDowell to get to the bottom of the crime.Allison Allen is tall, blonde, beautiful-and very much dead. As Samantha interviews the girl, who doesn't remember anything about the circumstances of her own murder, it's clear that there's more going on behind the walls of this manicured home than anyone wants to let on-and that Samantha has her work cut out for her this time.Juggling her own love life, tracking down troubled spirits, and evading attempts to thwart her investigation keeps Samantha on her toes. Good thing Samantha knows how to keep her eyes open, her wits about her, and her sense of humor.

     Lee Barnes, James’ best friend and neighbour, is awaiting the imminent release of his wife, Lydia, who has served six years for infanticide. But he’s not as prepared as he thought. In a last ditch effort to make things as perfect as possible his already troubled life takes a nose dive. Geraldine and James combine their wits to investigate several historical, unsolved murders for James’ latest book. James is impressed by her keen eye and instincts. However, because of her inability to keep her mouth shut, Geri, once again, finds herself the target of a crazed and vengeful killer.

    More than 100,000 words, humorous mystery books. Welcome to the glamorous universe of Kelly Kinki—yes, really! Working as a personal assistant of Michael Archangel—the hottest and the wackiest detective in D.C.—her day never ends without dead bodies… Ghostly Murder A murder in a locked room…The faceless ghost… Throw in a cross-dressing detective plus his assistant extraordinaire in this new mystery series! For Kelly Kinki, working as Archangel’s personal assistant was always an adventure, one that keeps her on her toes. As the resident consulting detective for the busy Washington D.C. Police Department and the FBI, Archangel took the confusing or unsolvable situations and spun a Sherlock hue over them, finding answers amongst the clues and closing cases even the most skilled law enforcement agents found confounding. Working as both his assistant and sounding board, Kelly has an intimate knowledge of the inner workings of Archangel’s deduction, and of his fabulous closet. Not only is he a detective savant, he is also a towering specimen of a man with an appetite for women’s high fashion that could put a runway model to shame – a fact that leaves his less-fashionable assistant flummoxed, and slightly jealous. It’s a classic ‘who-done-it’ with a not so classic answer. Immortal Eyes Serial murder with a sick ritual... The Dragon Lady...and the mismatched duo's race against time... Previously a socialite and a ‘real’ housewife, Kelly Kinki is now stuck with a dead-end job as a personal assistant to a private investigator. To Kelly, this translates as playing second fiddle to a guy who gets more cat-calls than she does. Michael Archangel is his name, catching killers is what he does, and he does it in...well, a short skirt and high heels. As a former FBI Special Agent turned P.I., Archangel knows his way around a crime scene as well as he does the local Agent Provocateur. His game de jour is toying with Kelly, his assistant—just like cat and mouse. However, they're a team, whether fending off rude paparazzi or manhandling the politicians, freaks, and other lowlifes roaming the streets of the nation's capital, the two are hell-bent on finding a serial killer who is holding the city hostage. Join Archangel, Kelly, and a host of oddball characters as they wind their way through a madcap crime thriller, with more twists and turns than a mind-bender roller coaster. Kelly's story is filled with raucous humor and irreverent satire, so buckle up. Who'll solve the crime, and who will take the credit? Perhaps all the investigators will get for their trouble is a full color splash on the cover of the Washington Post, "Latest Victims Discovered in Matching Frocks - One Male, One Female". Deadly Vision A murder of a sweetie pie… A newbie, pathetic agent…and the reluctant mentor… Voted #7 of DC’s Most Eligible Bachelors, now Michael Archangel—her boss—is officially the hottest PI in the neighborhood, and one of the most talented. Sought by clients and police alike for his wit and brain power, this is an American Sherlock with style – and a unique past. The college girl was last seen at Tricky Sundae, a local ice cream shop, and then she turns up dead. This time, the case seems so normal, at first. The victim, a universally-loved college student, has been strangled.

     Her marriage to Max was the first thing to come under scrutiny and on one sexless night in May, Mollie decided that their relationship was over. However, when a grouchy divorce lawyer convinces Mollie there’s a chance she could bow out of this life being eaten alive by a pack of cats, she starts to search for an alternative. Opening the can of worms that is her marriage makes Mollie realise she might not be as blameless as she initially thought… Will Mollie be able to rescue her marriage or has the lure of a life without wet towels on the bed turned her head? One thing is for sure… Mollie McQueen is NOT getting divorced. Praise for LACEY LONDON... "One of my favourite books of the year!" "An eye-opening, thoroughly enjoyable and very relatable read." "I honestly couldn't put this book down!" "Entertaining, sometimes desperately sad, very often uplifting and hugely life-affirming." "Another magnificent achievement for Lacey's remarkable pen. I'll never forget it." "A highly addictive roller coaster ride!"

    101 hilarious and dirty jokes for adults.

    Now they face not only the fight for survival in the new post-grid world, but a fight for the civilization they once belonged to. Their prepper band face challenges at home and all around them as they feel their way past new dangers and toward each other. And in the end, each of them must come full circle and face what they left behind: the city in ruins that has become the key to the region's freedom.

     If you love embarking on an emotional journey with Jojo Moyes or Amanda Prowse, you will adore Daniela Sacerdoti. Pamela has devoted her life to providing a safe haven in the village of Glen Avich for her daughter Mairi, a happy little girl with a big heart. Since her daughter's medical results came in and Mairi's father Douglas walked out, Pamela has vowed that no one would hurt Mairi again, least of all Douglas's bully of a father, who forbade his wife Morag to have anything to do with her granddaughter. When Pamela loses her mother, and her brother moves away, she finds herself alone and longing for a family for Mairi. So when a letter arrives from the recently widowed Morag, inviting them to visit her at home on the tiny island of Seal, Pamela agrees to go. Will it be another failed attempt to build bridges with Douglas's family? Or is Seal waiting for them with unexpected gifts?

    There, she and her best friend Declan work on medical advancements to benefit the world outside. Everything they do is dictated by the rules of the New Regime. When Guardian Costma, the leader of the New Regime, summons them to assign a new project, Julianna has serious objections to the nature of the project. With Declan’s help, she devises a plan to get them out of the Scholars Compound and live a life of their own making. However, they are blindly entering a world about which they know very little, and Guardian Costma will not let them go without a chase. Will they be able to find freedom they seek? Are their family members still out there waiting for their return? Or will the truths they learn be too much to handle?

    The police claim the death was of natural causes, but the knitters aren't buying it. If the police won't do any investigating, then they will!Get all three adventures of the Gray-Haired Knitting Detectives series in one bundle. The bundle includes Murder, Mystery & Dating Mayhem, Jack Gets His Man, and Love in the Time of Murder.Murder, Mystery & Dating MayhemA middle-aged widow gangs up with her gay best friend and a posse of gray-haired wannabe detectives to solve a murder. Maybe she should have stuck to speed dating? "a lot of fun to read. The characters are a hoot!!" "sweet, light and hilarious and kept you guessing!" "sure to put a smile on your face"Jack Gets His ManJack's life is awesome even if his ex is being a pain, but then his smoking hot new bookkeeper discovers things at his store aren't actually as they seem. Jack's bestie and the Gray-Haired Knitting Detectives jump at the chance to solve Jack's problems. Will Jack catch a thief or find love? "I ate this book up like a grubby little kid." "expertly worded and pretty funny suspense story with a romantic touch."Love in the Time of MurderWhen Dee's ex is murdered, she's the number one suspect. The Gray-Haired Knitting Detectives aren't about to let one of their own get sent to the slammer and jump at the chance to search for the true killer. "totally scrumptious cozy mystery" "This fun and witty whodunit will have you laughing till the very end."Buy now to join the Gray-Haired Knitting Detectives on all of their adventures.

    and Gerald Stockwell-Poulter has had quite enough of it already. Pesky business altogether. All this hiding and running about. Makes Brexit look like a doddle. After 87 largely well-behaved years as a model citizen, less than four hours into the ‘zompocalypse’ and he has already killed a neighbour, rescued a moody millennial drug dealer and forged an unlikely allegiance with a giant ginger Scotsman. And it isn’t even tea time. Join Gerald as he and his newfound allies navigate the post-apocalyptic English countryside in their hilarious bid to stay off the menu. THE GOOD LIFE meets DOUGLAS ADAMS meets SHAUN OF THE DEAD! - Dave F, Amazon The first instalment of the Old Man at the End of the World. A novella of 20,000 words. For fans of Frank Tayell (Surviving the Evacuation), Mark Tufo (Zombie Fallout), Diana Rowland (White Trash Zombie) and also Jonas Jonasson (The 100-Year-Old Man Who Climbed Out the Window and Disappeared) , Fredrik Backman (A Man Called Ove) and Catharina Ingelman-Sundberg (The Little Old Lady Who Broke All the Rules).

    How did we ever find time to go to work. New to Caravanning. Its mishaps. Its pleasures. Its fun. Susie and Jack take early retirement and end up biting off more than they can chew. An unexpected inheritance changes their lives forever.

     Bedlam, is the first of four books in the hysterically funny series, “Diary of a Stressed Out Mother”. Dora Loveday (harassed mother of four kids, two unruly dogs, and a psychotic cat), records the daily chaos and madness of her family life in this laugh-out-loud, comic romp of a diary!

    Okay yes, all that stuff too, but I'm not talking about that right now. The government has also been lying to us about space aliens. Aliens have landed on the National Mall and are asking to speak with the President of the United States. For the sake of the planet, diplomat Michael Wallenson is tasked with keeping them away from Donald Trump at all costs. Will Michael succeed? Or will these heavily armed, easily offended aliens succeed in reaching our leader? Building the border dome, coal-powered missiles, and the true identities of the men in black - all in Take Us To Your Trump, another hilarious satirical comedy from author Andrew Stanek.

    Lack of money is a high hurdle. Living with her grandfather, and working as a casino barmaid, she saves her tips to take classes in Seattle. With her eye to one day having her own clothing label, the redhead, keeps her eye on the prize, leaving men smitten with her beauty in her wake—a preacher, an American Indian law student, and a NY fashion designer. It isn’t until a newspaper reporter appears on her door step that she pauses to take a second look. But reporter Skip Hunter has no time for women. He is driven to become a N.Y. Times best-selling mystery writer using his reporting of crime on the streets of Seattle as fodder. Will the New York designer who borrows Gillianne’s sketches end her dream? Will a heist of a billion dollars worth of gold bullion give the reporter his big break? Will the intersection of their lives drive the pair into each other’s arms? Or, will their life plans, force them apart?