We all know one! They like to groan and grumble, offering their own commentary on the shortcomings of modern life. Whether it is queues at the supermarket, the state of the health system, the price of a pint these days, the hairstyles of teenagers, or the number of Maltesers you actually get in a bag, there is always something that will get their goat. 'The Grumpy Old Git's Guide to Life' is a hilarious celebration of all these grumps, how to identify one, what exactly they find so irritating and why we find their rants quite so amusing.

    While the sheriff conducts his investigation, Kelton begins to discover the small sleepy southern town by the interstate isn’t as quaint and innocent as it appears. The large bale of cash sealed in plastic found at the scene speaks to nefarious activities, and the idealistic young Kelton with his K-9 dutifully assists underfunded local law enforcement in getting to the bottom of things. Even when he realizes they aren’t telling him everything. But his discoveries make clear that his ingrained respect for authority and showing chivalry toward all is being taken advantage of by numerous shady characters trying to preserve their own legacies. Lawless lawmen and damsels not so distressed drive him to reexamine his values to decide which are still worth living by and how those apply in a world twisted by drugs, money, sex and power. Come take a gritty journey of suspense driven by deep desperate characters and soul ripping action. Join Kelton and Azrael settling on a moral course in a world where nobody is perfect and even evil is far from absolute, and making heroic strides in trying to do what is right. Let no one underestimate the unbreakable bond between a man and his dog. SPECIAL NOTICE I’m proud to be providing half of net royalties through September 30th 2016 to the Warrior Dog Foundation ( http://warriordogfoundation.org/ ). This great Non-Profit organization transitions K-9 heroes retiring from service with Special Operations Forces to their state-of-the-art kennel facility where they receive any needed physical or mental rehabilitation so they can live out their lives with dignity and grace. I’m not affiliated with their foundation, but couldn’t be happier to contribute.

    a lovely blend of humour, sexual comedy and pathos' Daily Express 'A rollicking tale of a Welsh sailor with a girl in every port, but only one true love at home...Thomas has a rare gift for words...This is his best book and a celebration of his robust talents, which combine flesh with imagination. He always had a narrative verve, and this saga develops it into a turn of the wheel of life. Revolving Jones comes back at last to his eternal miss, and hopefully, Leslie Thomas will achieve a revolution in his reputation' The Times 'This exciting adventure story is also one man's pilgrimage, a lifetime's odyssey, a ritually layered tale of the quest for humour and love' Daily Mail 'He inhabits that "bestseller author" territory that includes the likes of Jeffrey Archer, Jack Higgins and Ken Follett, but he is a far better writer than any of them' Marcel Berlins, Sunday Times

    Moved on to Caius Became the baius knaius. 'Oxford Blues' is one of the many new poems in this expanded and revised edition of The State of Poetry, Roger McGough's book of short humorous verse which was published in 2005 as part of Penguin's 70s series celebrating its 70th anniversary. From a poem commissioned to commemorate Dylan Thomas in just 140 characters, which unfortunately comes to an end mid-word, to a pre-emptive erratum notice, these poems show McGough at his inventive, hilarious best - and there are also new line drawings by the author offered at no extra cost.

    And after you read Why Do Dogs Drink out of the Toilet?, it will make perfect sense to you, too. Award-winning pet experts Dr. Marty Becker and Gina Spadafori take you on a trip into the canine mind. And it's not at all a scary place. . . .Dogs live to smell, to feel good, to clarify their relationship with other dogs (and with us), to love, to laugh. When you start looking at the world their way, everything falls into place. Of course they drink out of the toilet--the water is fresher. Sniffing another dog's behind is just like reading their resume, except you know nothing is made up. Barking at the letter carrier makes him go away--every single time! And rolling in stinky stuff just smells like heaven. (Because what smells heavenly is, after all, a matter of taste.)The better you understand dogs, the easier it is to love the pooch on your couch. Find out why hunting dogs don't mind suppressing their basic instinct, how assistance dogs for the blind get their job done, why little dogs like to mix it up with big dogs, and everything you always wanted to know about canine sex but were afraid to ask.You'll also find the answers to questions that tend to tickle your curiosity: How do dogs get into dog shows? Which breeds are made in America? Do some dogs really have dreadlocks? Do all dogs need a backyard? How did Lassie always find her way home?You've got questions? This book's got answers.

    Book by Stewart Nordensson, Lydia Kelley

    Born in Croydon in 1936, his early life was turbulent. His father left home and his mother committed suicide during the war leaving his formidable, but adored grandmother, to raise him, and it was she who gave him the title for this book. His big television break came with "Not So Much a Programme, More a Way of Life" with David Frost, John Bird and John Fortune and he also had a brief stint in the popular TV soap "Coronation Street". His radio career includes the hugely popular "The News Huddlines", which he starred in and ran for twenty-six years. "A Fart in a Colander" brings together some wonderful stories from his life, and sparkles with the fun and laughter Roy has brought to millions of people throughout his career.

    I pushed my sausages away untouched. Charting nearly ten years in the life of Adrian Mole, from his increasingly troubled adolescence and schooling to his first job as newt counter for the DoE, from his parents' marital troubles to his own difficult relationship with Pandora, from the failure of his early poems to the even grander failure of his epic novels, these three novels in one volume provide a hilarious portrait of one young man's coming of age. 'He will be remembered some day as one of England's great diarists. No matter what your troubles may be Adrian Mole is sure to make you feel better' Evening Standard

     The author and his wife adopted this unfortunate waif and so began a long period of recuperation and training, as they gradually helped Sheba back to full health and helped her to learn to live sociably and happily within their pack of rescue dogs. A story of real triumph over adversity, full of emotion and a fair amount of humor too, Sheba’s is a real-life tale of what can be achieved in rehabilitating a dog, having suffered a living hell, from the brink of death to a life full of happiness.

    Deceased. The first words out of the Operations Officer's mouth, after saying Sam was found, were "You are going to kick yourself."A volunteer search and rescue dog handler, Rebekkah has always put duty and responsibility first. She lives by the rules, believing that success means having a plan and not deviating from it. Dreams are things that happen at night and don't ever seem to come true for her. Things in Rebekkah's life are about to change, and she’s not really sure she’s ready for it. With her K-9 partners Ariel and Gus, Rebekkah faces decisions that could jeopardize their lives every time they deploy. As she responds to missing person searches through treacherous terrain, emotional battles and bitter disappointment, she finds that there is a fine line between success and failure; but that the search for life is definitely worth the risk.Sharolyn Sievert, a seasoned K-9 handler herself, takes the reader with her on fictional missions in K-9 SEARCH—One Handler’s Journey, weaving the laughter, fears, faith and tears of a life that isn’t sensational or sexy, and definitely not glamorous, but a heartwarming and genuine reflection of a SAR dog handler and her dogs.

    This second book tells of the first two years that she owned her own barge, the Vereeniging, and how she converts it from an empty hull into a home. Told with with Valerie's usual tongue-in-cheek humour, Harbour Ways can be read as a stand alone memoir or as the follow on to Watery Ways.

    And it's a snip at the price! Fans of Douglas Lindsay's genre-defining barbershop death junky novels will be delighted to know that THE BARBERSHOP SEVEN includes the complete, unabridged text from the following Barney Thomson novels:#1 THE LONG MIDNIGHT OF BARNEY THOMSON#2 THE BARBER SURGEON'S HAIRSHIRT#3 MURDERERS ANONYMOUS#4 THE RESURRECTION OF BARNEY THOMSON#5 THE LAST FISH SUPPER#6 THE HAUNTING OF BARNEY THOMSON#7 THE FINAL CUTPraise for the Barney Thomson novels"This chilling black comedy unfolds at dizzying speed... an impressive debut novel." – Sunday Mirror"The plot, Russian literature fans, is a modern spin on Dostoyevsky’s Crime and Punishment. The bloody ending, movie buffs, is pure Reservoir Dogs." – The Mirror"This is pitch-black comedy spun from the finest writing. Fantastic plot, unforgettable scenes and plenty of twisted belly laughs." – New Woman"A mad, macabre romp with surreal characters and cutting black humour." – The Sunday Mirror"Gloriously over the top, very bloody and very, very funny." – Daily Telegraph"A novel which is both genuinely silly and a fun read." – The Scotsman"Extremely well-written, highly amusing and completely unpredictable in its outrageous plot twists and turns." – The List"Lindsay’s burlesque thrills offer no sex, no drugs, no desperation to be cool. Just straightforward adult story; fantastic plot, classic timing and gleeful delight in the grotesque. With more talent than Irvine Welsh could dream of, Lindsay has crafted a macabre masterpiece where content lives up to style." – What’s On About the author Douglas Lindsay is the author of the Barney Thomson crime series, which begins with THE LONG MIDNIGHT OF BARNEY THOMSON. He is also the author of the thriller, LOST IN JAUREZ, as well as the police procedurals, THE UNBURIED DEAD (Thomas Hutton #1), A PLAGUE OF CROWS (Thomas Hutton #2) and WE ARE THE HANGED MAN (DCI Jericho #1). Douglas lives in Somerset.

    Nothing else going on. No girlfriend meeting his father for the first time. No recused sister back in his life after having been missing for a decade. No other sister married to a werecoyote gangster with a freshly born grandchild to show off. Especially no vampires. I promise. THE KING HENRY TAPES Book 1 - "The Foul Mouth and the Fanged Lady" (released) Book 2 - "The Foul Mouth and the Cat Killing Coyotes" (released) Book 3 - "The Foul Mouth and the Troubled Boomworm" (released) Book 4 - "The Foul Mouth and the Headless Hunny" (released) Book 5 - "The Foul Mouth and the Mancy Martial Artist" (released) Book 5.5 - "King Henry and the Three Little Trips" (released) Book 6 - "The Foul Mouth and the Pit of No Return" (released) Book 6.5 - "Assault on Dread Fortress Paine" (released) Book 6.75 - "The Glassbreaker Goes Home" (released) Book 7 - "The Foul Mouth and the Runaway Rumble" (forthcoming)

    Remember Me? will give owners of dogs who have canine cognitive dysfunction or other dementia the information they need to weather the difficult condition and give their dogs the most fulfilling life possible. In Remember Me, you will learn about: The symptoms of canine cognitive dysfunction; Medications and other interventions that are showing promise in treating the condition; How to adapt your home and habits to keep your dog safe; The many products available to solve the problems of senior dogs; How to make things easier on yourself, physically and emotionally; and The complex question of euthanasia and how to make your own decision about it. The book includes more than 30 photos of dementia symptoms, tips and tricks, and hazards to avoid when caring for a senior dog. The story of Anderson’s small terrier Cricket, who developed dementia, is threaded through the book. As Cricket's dementia worsened she paced, she circled, she stood in corners, she forgot what she was doing, and at times she lost and found her owner repeatedly. For the last weeks of her life she even forgot how to drink water. As Cricket’s condition deteriorated and needs changed, Anderson learned about the disease and developed methods to care for her dog. She shares these methods in Remember Me? and her calm, conversational tone is soothing to dog owners who are suffering—sometimes more than their dogs.

     Includes Overdue Account, Walter's Cargo Shorts, Simon's Piecharts, Missing Missy, Obviously a Foggot, Formal Complaints, Justin’s Floodlight, Matthew’s Party, Permission Slip and many more.