He's confronted the HOA. He's even taken on Santa himself. He doesn't usually win. These are the tales of the Dumb White Husband and they are all available here in this collected edition.This handsome volume includes:Dumb White Husband vs. the Grocery Store - John would rather sit and watch the game, but his wife needs some things at the store. Can he complete the list and get back in time to see the end of the game?Dumb White Husband vs. Halloween - Every Halloween, Chris has the scariest house on the block and gives out the best candy. But, this year, someone is showing him up and he'll stop at nothing to find out who.Dumb White Husband vs. Santa - Erik has planned the perfect Christmas for his family. The plan is foolproof, bulletproof and flame retardant. Nothing can undo the hours of planning and preparation. Nothing except maybe odd-shaped packages, ill-timed fruitcakes or an errant neighborhood Santa Claus.Dumb White Husband vs. the Tooth Fairy - Erik always has a plan and he's sure he would have figured out the whole Tooth Fairy thing eventually. But, when his three-year-old son takes a frisbee to the mouth, he's forced to speed things up. Between neighborhood kids with big mouths and unhelpful dentists he's going to need to improvise. Will he bend to the pressure of inflation? Will he get caught in the act? And, what do you do with those teeth anyway?Dumb White Husband for President (A novella) - There comes a time in every man's life when he must stand for the things he believes in. John doesn't believe in bagging his grass. So, when a new allergy-prone neighbor gets the HOA to require it, there's only one thing he can do - run for President of The Creeks of Sage Valley Phase II.John, Chris and Erik put aside most of their differences to run a campaign that they hope will see John elected as President and end the meddling of the rule-loving new kid on the block. Will they succeed? It's doubtful.

    Hilariously ironic and irreverent, in Dirty Birds, Morgan Murray generates a quest novel for the twenty-first century--a coming-of-age, rom-com, crime-farce thriller--where a hero's greatest foe is his own crippling mediocrity as he seeks purpose in art, money, power, crime, and sleeping in all day.

    Pyle comes an adorable and profound universe in pink, blue, green, and purple. Based on the phenomenally popular Instagram of the same name, Strange Planet covers a full life cycle of the planet’s inhabitants, including milestones such as:The Emergence DayBeing Gains a SiblingThe Being Family Attains a BeastThe Formal Education of a BeingCelebration of Special DaysBeing Begins a VocationThe Beings at HomeHealth Status of a BeingThe Hobbies of a BeingThe Extended Family of the BeingThe Being Reflects on Life While Watching the Planet RotateWith dozens of never-before-seen illustrations in addition to old favorites, this book offers a sweet and hilarious look at a distant world not all that unlike our own.

    Time to smooth things over and stop…fighting. They can’t seem to agree about anything. Faith's job as a producer is on the line and his long hours at the FBI are tearing them apart. Thank goodness, they have thirty days until their twin sons are born.Or so they thought...Three days before Christmas they get a surprise. The babies can’t wait. Nothing is ready. Including them. And...Faith won’t wake up after the delivery.Now Greg's re-writing his letter to Santa. He’ll make any sacrifice to keep his family together. He won’t lose his Faith again…His Christmas Surprise is the follow-up to All for Me, but can be read as a standalone...Previously titled A Must for Christmas (less)

    With an attitude ... and opinions ... on everything. "The PsychoKitty Speaks Out" is the diary of Max, a put-upon and under-appreciated domestic feline with both a disdain and a fondness for Sticky Little People, an addiction to Kitty Crack, and an appetite for Stinky Goodness. He began his popular blog "The Psychokitty Speaks Out" in October of 2003, and this is an expansion of that journal; all those dates when he didn't blog--they're here, in all his snarky glory.

    The first of its kind to carry doctors and surgeons who can take the hospital to the patient. Drug addicts, lorry crashes, open-heart surgery, stab wounds, headless chickens, mating llamas, and strip routines - it's all in a day's work for emergency doctor Tony Bleetman and his team.Whether they are landing in the middle of the M1 or at a maximum security jail, Tony and his crew Helimed 999 are the first on the scene in the most critical of emergencies.This gripping read will make you laugh, cry and marvel at the wonders of life (and death) in equal measure.

    until he gets a call from his missing sister! It takes him on a journey where he meets a young hooker, hillbillies, truckers, and a crazy church. He also meets someone he never knew: himself.

    

    And the adventure has only begun! In her first humor-packed guide to raising twins, Elizabeth Lyons and her "multiples" sorority offer the wisdom of their combined experience in the form of practical shortcuts, real-world strategies, and sage advice. Topics include: - Preparing the Lair: Mandatory Gear for Babies AND Mom - Twinproofing Your Marriage - Breastfeeding Strategies (and Why It's Okay if You Don't) - Unsolicited Advice: Stories from the Trenches - Getting Twins on a Schedule--Preferably the Same One Lyons balances the day-to-day challenges of raising twins--from double feedings to sleep deprivation to getting out while pretending everything's under control--with a sanity-saving dose of camaraderie. By the end, you'll be smiling and shouting, "Thank heaven, I'm not alone!"

    Salvation is at hand. Singing hymns of praise is standard practice-now it's time to set your feet a-tapping with a collection of original dance moves inspired by Jesus and the likes of Moses and John the Baptist. Dances include: the Water Walk, the Temptation Tango, the Judas Hustle, and The Apostolic Conga. Each dance move is outlined with: how to, inspiration, and an illustration. Slyly irreverent but ultimately festive, Dancing with Jesus is illustrated in full color. Best of all, two of the dances are animated for full effect by a lenticular cover and last-spread finale, making this a truly one-of-a-kind novelty item! As the Bible says in Ecclesiastes, there is, "A time to weep, a time to laugh, a time to mourn, a time to dance."

    In "A Matter Of Some Gravity" by fan favorite Don Rosa, saucy sorceress Magica De Spell turns Scrooge's life sideways - literally! - when she distorts the forces of gravity with a brand new magic wand! Then, in "The Sign Of The Triple Distelfink," lucky Gladstone Gander faces a 24 ­hour luck jinx­ and battles to hide it from a gloating Cousin Donald! Only ever published in the USA in underprinted mid­-1990s editions, these Rosa classics are back like you've never seen them before!

    She dreams of being a star on the silver screen, but her performance this year is on the stage at school. She has to share the spotlight with her cousin Ana, though, and Rebecca fears the audience will laugh instead of applaud. Will Ana hurt or help the performance? Then, being included in a special plan fills Rebecca with joy. But what act of kindness teaches her the true meaning of the holiday season?

    Lorna Rafferty is up to her eyeballs in debt and can't stop her addiction to Ebay. Sandra Vanderslice, battling agoraphobia, pays her shoe bills by working as a phone sex operator. And Jocelyn Bowen is a nanny for the family from hell (who barely knows a sole from a heel but who will do anything to get out of the house).  On Tuesday nights, these women meet to trade shoes, and, in the process, form friendships that will help them each triumph over their problems—from secret pasts to blackmail, bankruptcy, and dating.  Funny, emotional, and powerful, Shoe Addicts Anonymous is the perfect read for any woman who has ever struggled to find the perfect fit.

    With very spare, incredibly lively language, this is an entertaining read-aloud, with two amazing and oh-so-adorable characters at its heart. When a greyhound meets a groundhog, wordplay and crazy antics ensue. The two animals, much like kids, work themselves into a frenzy as they whirl around and around one another. ("Around, round hound. Around, greyhound.") The pace picks up ("Around and around and astound and astound"), until they ultimately wear themselves out. Jenkins s masterful text is deceptively simple. NPR on "Toys Meet Snow" by Emily Jenkins Appelhans, whose career up to now has been in animated films such as "Coraline, " is a revelation. "Booklist, " Starred, on "Sparky!, " illustrated by Chris Appelhans Appelhans makes an auspicious picture book debut with strikingly beautiful watercolor and pencil illustrations. His style, reminiscent of Jon Klassen s, incorporates a muted color palette, but with a slightly softer, rounder quality, while also weaving in visual deadpan humor. "The Horn Book""

    He also has the tender memories of his grandfather's exaggerated stories of Irish wonder and magic stories of leprechauns and legends and the mysterious power of fate. But he doesnot have the story of why his grandfather left Ireland as a young man.Mesmerized by his romantic vision of Ireland, Cooper begins his search with a charming, down-on- his-luck Irish actor. He is also unprepared for the presence of Kathleen O'Reilly. As Cooper hunts for his grandfather's ghost, the landmarks and the fate of the Irish that Finn Coghlan talked of magically brings Cooper and Kathleen together. Yet, there is a truth between the two of them that not even the enchanting tale of Finn McCool and Sally Cavanaugh can resolve. For that, Cooper must use the one gift bestowed on him as a child by his grandfatherBogmeadow's wish.