Gay Haiku
Joel Derfner - 2005
A delicate balance of rhythm and line, the haiku has provided countless readers with an appreciation of the changing of the seasons and the miracles of nature. Now, in Gay Haiku, readers can finally appreciate more important things—like the changing of boyfriends and the miracles of shopping.Irresistible and irreverent, this collection of one hundred and ten witty and wicked short poems captures the many dating disasters of first-time author Joel Derfner. In a wonderfully fresh and original voice, Derfner shamelessly mines his personal life to send up such broad-ranging topics as gay pop culture, politics, family, sex, and, of course, home decorating.Gay, straight, or undecided, readers will delight in Derfner’s dry sense of humor and unmistakable charm as he tackles the big questions of life.
More Rants, Raves, and Crazy Days of an ER Nurse: Funny, True Life Stories of Medical Humor from the Emergency Room
Dani Jacobs - 2016
A 24/7 non stop medical roller coaster of thrills, pills, and nasty spills. We've got fights, bites, and flashing lights. Think you've heard it all? Think again. Get ready for the all the over the top stories I still don't believe and the patients that come with them.
Don't Eat the Puffin: Tales From a Travel Writer's Life
Jules Brown - 2018
Get paid to travel and write about it.Only no one told Jules that it would mean eating oily seabirds, repeatedly falling off a husky sled, getting stranded on a Mediterranean island, and crash-landing in Iran.The exotic destinations come thick and fast – Hong Kong, Hawaii, Huddersfield – as Jules navigates what it means to be a travel writer in a world with endless surprises up its sleeve.Add in a cast of larger-than-life characters – Elvis, Captain Cook, his own travel-mad Dad – and an eye for the ridiculous, and this journey with Jules is one you won’t want to miss.
Stash Envy: And Other Quilting Confessions And Adventures
Lisa Boyer - 2005
And she's determined to enjoy making quilts. In fact, she will not -- absolutely will not -- let the risk of making a mistake, or a less-than- perfect quilt, keep her from relishing the task! In the 34 chapters of this new book, Lisa covers: The need for new fabric colors -- "blurple," "rorange," and "brellow," to name a few; The virtues of lumps in a quilt; How to share your bum fat quarter at a fabric exchange; How crocheting doilies will drive you back to quilting; How to cope when your quilts lack depth and dimension. Lisa Boyer is a breeze of fresh air. She brings you back to the pleasure of quilting with her confessions and adventures in Stash Envy!
Never Stop Shutting Up: A Book of Advice and Other Things You Didn't Ask For
Mike Falzone - 2012
Of Moose and Men: A Skewed Look at Life in Alaska
A.E. Poynor - 1999
E. Poynor. For less than twenty percent of what you paid for that grande maple-choco-frappa-machacino latte you'll spew out your nose while reading this book, you can learn about an aspect of Alaska most people never think about: everyday life in Alaska. Of Moose and Men: A Skewed Look at Life in Alaska provides a unique insight into the Land of the Midnight Sun, where laughing about the trials unique to the country is better than giving up.
Chicken Soup for the Indian Teenage Soul
Jack Canfield - 2009
Unplayable Lies
Dan Jenkins - 2015
Half of the essays are brand new, the others are all reworked and rewritten, based on pieces that were originally published in Golf Digest. Often biting, usually cranky, always hilarious and surprising—this is Dan Jenkins at his best, writing about the sport he loves the most. "I've always wanted to do something for the golfer who has everything. I thought about a suede golf cart, or maybe a pair of cashmere Footjoys. Then I settled on writing this book." So begins Dan Jenkins's latest—and funniest—collection of golf essays. The book consists of thirty-eight essays, all of them, as Dan says in the first essay, are "literally throbbing with opinion." In this book Dan delves into the greatest rounds of golf he's ever seen; the funniest things said on a golf course; the rivalries on tour and in the press box; the game's most magical moments—and its most absurd. Unplayable Lies is an ode to the game Jenkins loves. But it is Dan Jenkins, so nothing—even the game of golf—can escape his wrath, his critical eye, or his acerbic pen. The best way to describe it is to turn the book over to Mr. Jenkins: In "Titanic and I"—probably the most hilarious and surprising essay in the book, telling true stories of Titanic Thompson: gambler, golf hustler, accused murderer, legendary storyteller—Dan explains how Titanic would win a wager by saying he could knock a bird off a telephone wire: "Titanic would drop a ball on the ground and take out his four-wood, waggle it, and pretend to aim at the bird on the wire. When some sucker would bet him he couldn't do it, Ti would pull out a gun he carried and shoot the bird off the wire." In "The Greatest Rounds": "Show me a man who doesn't know what Arnold did in the last round of the '60 U.S. Open at Cherry Hills, and I'll show you a soccer fan in Paraguay." This is a perfect follow up to His Ownself. It even has an Introduction by Sally Jenkins, one of the country's top sportswriters and Dan's own darling daughter.
Bali Daze
Cat Wheeler - 2011
Bali Daze tips the reader off the tourist trail as long-term resident Cat Wheeler hurtles into the fascinating, complex and often bewildering adventure of putting down roots in Ubud.
Toddlers Are A**holes: It's Not Your Fault
Sopha King Tyerd - 2014
Delve deep into the mind of these creatures and learn what makes them tick.
When God Created Mothers
Erma Bombeck - 2005
Now in this beautiful keepsake edition, Bombeck's moving words are paired with original art that bring to life the warm portrait of motherhood contained within. An angel marvels at the detail and overtime that the good Lord is putting into his creation of mothers. Despite the six pairs of hands and the three pairs of eyes that every mother needs, the angel thinks she has discovered a flaw:"There's a leak," she pronounced. "I told you that you were trying to put too much into this model.""It's not a leak," said the Lord. "It's a tear.""What's it for?""It's for joy, sadness, disappointment, pain, loneliness and pride.""You are a genius," said the angel.The Lord looked somber, "I didn't put it there." Every mother will treasure this moving tribute, penned by America's most beloved expert on motherhood.
Trout Magic
Robert Traver - 1974
Traver recounts the story of a mysterious "dancing fly, " speaks pointedly about "kiss-and-tell" fishermen, debunks fly fishermen as the "world's greatest snobs, " lets us in on the fishing story Life missed, and takes us along on his strangest fishing trip. We meet the unforgettable Danny McGinnis, guide, and other choice characters and events from his anything-but-ordinary fishing trips. Traver even has some new angles on women anglers and does a free piece of tongue-in-cheek literary sleuthing into Ernest Hemingway's story "Big Two-Hearted River."There's enough trout magic here to rub off on every reader -- man, woman, or child -- as Robert Traver weaves his inimitable storytelling spell. Trout Magic is a marvelous catch of wit, wisdom, and anecdote sure to delight everyone who enjoys a master storyteller who just happens to write here about his wonderful world of trout fishing.
Emergency Laughter: Stories of Humor Inside Ambulances and Operating Rooms
Mike Cyra - 2015
Whether he's assisting trauma surgeons who are singing “Take me out to the ballgame” while removing a well-placed iconic symbol of America’s greatest past time, learning how fast he can run after being shot at by an angry couple who called for an ambulance, working with a prankster-loving urologist who demonstrates how bladder problems were diagnosed before modern urinalysis, or screaming like a little girl while doing night rounds with a dead flashlight on a psychiatric ward, Cyra’s comedic style of storytelling will make your cheeks sore. Emergency Laughter: Stories of Humor Inside Ambulances and Operating Rooms shows why most health care professionals have such a twisted sense of humor and how critical laughter is to the survival of both patient and care giver.
Prescription: Murder! Volume 1: Authentic Cases From The Files of Alan Hynd
Alan Hynd - 2014
These stories, the first of three short collections, are unified by a single theme: they all involve physicians. And not for the autopsy, but as perpetrators or accused perpetrators. You may never see your family care giver again in the same light. Told in the characteristic wry, anecdotal reportorial style that made Alan Hynd famous in his day (two wartime best sellers in 1943, contributions to The Reader's Digest, Colliers, Coronet, The Saturday Evening Post, True, Liberty, The American Mercury and almost every true detective magazine in print) these tales will have you cringing one minute, laughing the next, and gasping in shock a moment later. Truly, no one could make up classics like these. Take for example, the murder ring of South Philadelphia in which a faith healer and two Lotharios helped restless wives rid themselves of abusive unwanted husbands...or the respected French war hero who was a pillar of the community by day but prowled brothels and music halls by night and was caught with a cadaver sealed within the walls of his home....or the traveling physician who married a farmer's ex-wife and had four step-sons, then three, then two, then...... And finally, as a bonus track, relax and savor the wickedly evil doings of "Sister Amy Archer" at the Archer convalescent home in Connecticut, where old folks checked out just a little too quickly for comfort. The events eventually became the basis of "Arsenic and Old Lace," the hit play and iconic movie. As the old adages go, you couldn't make this stuff up... and true crime is always farther out there than fiction. (With illustrations)
How to Move to Canada: A Discontented American's Guide to Canadian Relocation
André Du Broc - 2016
If you or someone you know is discontented, distressed, or downright disturbed, maybe the Great White North is right for you, eh. But how much do you really know about Canada? Can you do a job that Canada needs (do you play hockey, drill for oil, or make poutine?)? Can you identify the best Canadian province for your lifestyle (lots of tundra or just some tundra?)? Can you master the proper pronunciation of "sorry"? What strange wizardry is the Canadian government? Is maple syrup acceptable substitution for currency? At long last, How to Move to Canada can help make your vague threat into a cold Canadian reality. This book is also full of activities such as: Color the flag of your new homeland Match the strange Canuck dialect with their local definitions And more! PLEASE NOTE: This is a humor book. It won't really help you emigrate. Rather, it's a subversive mix of real information on the Great White North plus a hilarious look at all the reasons why you won't like it there any better — and why they probably won't have you anyway.