Broken Bananah is my completely true and overly honest journey through severe genital trauma. What happens when you lose something you love? And... can you really break a penis? Absolutely, and mine was one of the worst on file. Tethered to a catheter and surrounded by that’s-what-she-said jokes, I learned one of life’s greatest lessons: it can always be worse. Experience life and love without a penis in a recovery story that could only happen in New York City. Let’s laugh til we cry, dive into the weird, and grapple with the power of sex in this modern coming-of-something tale.

    She is a horse-mad girl strongly attracted to the idea of farming, Aubrey is the son of a farm manager without land or money. But with limited knowledge, much enthusiasm and the challenge of raising their young family, anything can happen. This is the true story of a shepherding life; where icy nights are spent searching for lost sheep, the lambing sheds are filled with the first cries of newborns, and idyllic summers are spent in the show ring. Amusing, poignant and beautifully detailed, this is a book about how dreams can grow from small beginnings into breeding prize-winning Texel sheep in the Cotswolds. Sue and Aubrey Andrews are internationally renowned breeders of pedigree Texels. Perfect for fans of The Yorkshire Shepherdess and The Shepherd's Life.

    But instead of fame and fortune, he found himself stuck behind a wall of script-killing rewrites, unable to make a living.In Return to the Big Fancy, Freeman shares his wildly entertaining journey back through the fiery gates of Retail Hell. He thought he had seen it all in his day, but with the bar set higher than ever before, employees are now graciously bowing before Corporate as they climb over fellow salespeople, and even friends, to earn enough transactions and commissions to actually survive. As he learns more of the wretchedness that has befallen the sales floor, he realizes that The Big Fancy has its customers and its employees on a short leash. But leave it to Freeman and the threat of disappearing commissions to rally the retail slaves and show Corporate who's really in charge!

    

    Baseball Prospectus 2013 brings together an elite group of analysts to provide the definitive look at the upcoming season in critical essays and commentary on the thirty teams, their managers, and more than sixty players and prospects from each team.Contains critical essays on each of the thirty teams and player comments for some sixty players for each of those teamsProjects each player's stats for the coming season using the groundbreaking PECOTA projection system, which has been called "perhaps the game's most accurate projection model" (Sports Illustrated)From Baseball Prospectus, America's leading provider of statistical analysis for baseballNow in its eighteenth edition, this New York Times bestselling insider's guide remains hands down the most authoritative and entertaining book of its kind.

    Now, it's time to get into the game and help your family through your baby's first year.From 4 A.M. feedings and visiting the pediatrician to getting back to work and hopping into bed with Mom, Dude, You're a Dad leads you through all the trials and tribulations you'll face as a new dad. Author John Pfeiffer has braved the journey not just once but three times, and will tell you exactly what changes to expect as well as what you can be doing for your baby--and your baby mama--during this time. Complete with foolproof parenting strategies for handling tricky situations, this book also braces you for the years to come, which will be full of head banging, temper tantrums, and restless days.The first twelve months are make-or-break when it comes to parenting and Dude, You're a Dad is your guide to making sure that nothing gets broken.

    Winning the 2008 national championship was certainly the highlight, but the most dominant era in school history also includes a national-best 300 wins, three Final Fours and nine Big 12 titles since 2001.The consistency was unmatched.As a sportswriter covering the Jayhawks, first for The Kansas City Star and then for Yahoo! Sports, Jason King was there to chronicle it all. From Roy Williams' stunning departure to Mario's Miracle against Memphis to Kansas' 69-game winning streak at Allen Fieldhouse, King witnessed all the highlights - and lowlights - from 2000 and beyond. In short, he was the ultimate insider.Now you will be, too.With "Beyond the Phog," King provides Kansas fans with an unprecedented glimpse into one of the most memorable eras in the program's rich history. Extensive interviews with nearly 40 players from the last decade, as well as both head coaches, reveal fascinating details about the inner-workings of a true college basketball dynasty.You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll be riveted - and, at times, shocked. Whatever the case, even the most ardent Kansas supporters will be exposed to candid, behind the scenes stories and anecdotes that, until now, had been confined to the Jayhawks' locker room.Here's a sample of what's inside:• Did Drew Gooden's shoes cost Kansas the 2002 NCAA title?• Nick Collison and Kirk Hinrich lament their final game against Syracuse• Roy Williams provides details about his final few weeks at Kansas and his relationship with Al Bohl• Why did Wayne Simien almost quit basketball?• Jeff Graves comes clean about violating a sacred locker room rule• Russell Robinson describes why he tried to fight his own coach• J.R. Giddens gives his version of the Moon Bar stabbing• Darrell Arthur explains why he's been hesitant to return to campus since winning the 2008 title• Mario Chalmers provides a step-by-step account of his heroic shot against Memphis• Tyshawn Taylor discusses the aftermath of the Jayhawks' 2011 loss to VCU• Josh Selby talks about his decision to enter the NBA draft• And hundreds of other stories from favorites such as Sherron Collins, Keith Langford, Jeff Boschee, Aaron Miles, Michael Lee, Eric Chenowith, Xavier Henry, Luke Axtell, Sasha Kaun, Tyrel Reed, Jeff Hawkins, Brady Morningstar, Darnell Jackson and others.Time has clearly loosened lips in Lawrence. "Beyond the Phog" is an honest, candid look at what really happened during a magical - and often controversial - period in Kansas basketball history.

    

    Personally, I think the eye-catching cover shot of me in my pajamas is reason enough. (By the way, those are my real kids on the cover, and yes, those are my actual ankles. No, I'm not retaining water.)What you're holding in your hands is a very funny and sometimes remarkably poignant look at fathers, not from the mother's point of view or the child's, but from the dad's side. Which is why it's called Tales from the Dad Side.It's filled with stories of what it's like to be a dad and a son, from a child's first day of kindergarten to the awkward sex talk and right up to the day the always-practical dad tries to pay for college with bonus miles. I was there for every landmark in my children's lives, except the day I was on the riding lawn mower and missed my son's first words, which my wife insists were “trust fund.”As children get older, the lessons of the father get harder, like teaching my son how to shave just as my father taught me, with a rusty double-edged safety razor. At the end of my dad's lesson, I emerged from the bathroom nicked and gouged, looking like an extra from a Quentin Tarantino film. My more civilized son is a Norelco man. With my high-school-age daughters, I promised them a day on which I'd take them anywhere and do anything with them they wanted, expecting them to ask for dinner and a movie; I was horrified when they told me they wanted all of us to get manicures and pedicures together. That was not the answer I was expecting; it was like discovering Lou Dobbs was an illegal alien.Over the course of raising three children, I have learned with my wife that fathers are different from mothers. That could be the greatest understatement since Noah turned on the Weather Channel and found out that the next forty days called for a 20 percent chance of light rain.The truth is, fatherhood is like Wikipedia: some parts based in fact, others just made up along the way. And while bookstores are filled with tales of mothers, their children and families, there are few from the dad's side. Now, as a public service, I'm doing my part to right this wrong.I sincerely hope this answers your questions. If perhaps it's not exactly your cup of tea, I bet you've got a father or mother in your life who'd like the stone-cold truth about dads. Besides, for the same money, you can either put three gallons of gas in your car or take home this book, which has a highway rating of 29 smiles an hour.Steve Doocy

    Kay Bratt explores these ideas in All (my) Dogs Go to Heaven. Touching on relevant Biblical scriptures, she chronicles her tumultuous past— including a traveling childhood and a near decade of domestic abuse— revealing how her beloved pets helped her cope, and instilled hope for better days ahead. Interspersed within this memoir are short essays from real people who have experienced signs from their departed pets as proof that they are still around in spirit. Included in the back of the book is a Grief Guide to help get us through those first devastating days after our loss.Insightful and fascinating, Kay Bratt has ultimately given us a message of hope with All (my) Dogs Go to Heaven. -Judy Morgan, Founder of Yorkie Rescue of the Carolinas

    Welcome to laughing until it hurts while covered in bodily fluids. Welcome to simple math at very high stakes. Welcome to an incredibly inappropriate sense of humor. Welcome to serving people on the most stressful days of their lives. Welcome to putting your hands in places you never imagined they'd be. Welcome to your front row seat to the ballad of life and death. That's not the welcome that this nurse was looking for, but that's the one he got. Irreverent and audacious, this brutally honest memoir covers what it’s like to come of age in an American Hospital. Welcome to a rollicking peak behind the curtain to what medical providers, and the health care system, are truly like.

    Whether he's assisting trauma surgeons who are singing “Take me out to the ballgame” while removing a well-placed iconic symbol of America’s greatest past time, learning how fast he can run after being shot at by an angry couple who called for an ambulance, working with a prankster-loving urologist who demonstrates how bladder problems were diagnosed before modern urinalysis, or screaming like a little girl while doing night rounds with a dead flashlight on a psychiatric ward, Cyra’s comedic style of storytelling will make your cheeks sore. Emergency Laughter: Stories of Humor Inside Ambulances and Operating Rooms shows why most health care professionals have such a twisted sense of humor and how critical laughter is to the survival of both patient and care giver.

    With full-color photo essays, the author guides readers past good taste, sense and even logic into the magical, mayhem-ridden world known as his life.

    Schirripa, The Sopranos’ own Bobby Bacala, exposes the inner mysteries of this unique Italian-American hybrid in A Goomba’s Guide to Life so that anyone can walk, talk, and live like a guy “from the neighborhood.”Über-goomba Steve Schirripa shows how being a goomba made him what he is today, offering lessons learned on his own journey from Bensonhurst to Vegas, and to his current gig as Bobby Bacala on one of TV’s most popular shows. Along the way, he shares secrets that will help you get in touch with your own inner goomba. You’ll learn what music to enjoy (Sinatra, yes; Snoop Dogg, no), what movies to watch (Raging Bull, yes; Titanic, never), which sports to follow (baseball is good; golf and tennis, fuhgeddaboudit), and even tips on goomba etiquette. Ever wonder how a real goomba gets the best seat in the house? (Hint: It involves tipping, jewelry, and intimidation.) Schirripa even includes goomba do’s and don’ts (never, ever criticize a goomba’s mother or her gravy; always wear more jewelry than you think you need).With knockout photographs of Schirripa and his compares, and insider information on how to think goomba, speak goomba, cook and eat goomba, and even how to behave at goomba weddings and funerals, A Goomba’s Guide to Life will show any wiseguy wannabe how to sing like a Soprano.

    29 pages of chapter summaries, quotes, character analysis, themes, and more – everything you need to sharpen your knowledge of Naked. This detailed literature summary also contains Topics for Discussion and a Free Quiz on Naked by David Sedaris.