Hard-Hitting Insults for Every OccasionIncluding      •  Insulting Someone’s Intelligence      •  Insulting Someone’s Sexual Prowess      •  Insults for the Office      •  Insults on Game Day     •  Insults throughout History     •  Insults from around the WorldPlus insulting gestures, backhanded compliments, comebacks, all the things you should never say about someone's mama, and much more!

    Perfect for those who want to pick up some new slang and those who want to translate it, Urban Dictionary is a gritty and witty look at our ever-changing language.Urbandictionary.com is a wildly successful site that encourages users to define the world with their own unique terms. In Urban Dictionary, site founder Aaron Peckham culls his more than 170,000 definitions for the funniest, and most provocative phrases that define the modern slang scene.Within urbandictionary.com's lively lexicon are:* business provocative--Attire used to provoke sexual attention in the workplace.* compunicate--To chat with someone in the same room via instant messenging service instead of in person.* dandruff--A person who "flakes out" and ditches their friends. * wingman--A guy who takes one for the team by hooking up with a hot girl's ugly friend so his own friend can hook up with the hot girl.Perfect for those who want to pick up some new slang and those who want to translate it, Urban Dictionary is a gritty and witty look at our ever-changing language.Urban Dictionary covers the language that encompasses the trials and tribulations that anyone under 30 encounters--and leaves everyone over 30 scratching their heads but wanting to know more.

    Why cope with insecurities I don't already have?That last one's just me? All right, then.But if the rest sounds familiar, you are experiencing Girl Logic: a characteristically female way of thinking that appears contradictory and circuitous but is actually a complicated and highly evolved way of looking at the world. You end up considering every repercussion of every choice (about dating, career, clothes, lunch) before making a move toward what you really want. And why do we attempt these mental hurdles? Well, that's what this book is all about.The fact is, whether you're obsessing over his last text or the most important meeting of your career, your Girl Logic serves a purpose: It helps push you, question what you want, and clarify what will make you a happier, better person. Girl Logic can be every confident woman's secret weapon, and this book shows you how to wield it.

    She plans to make her comeback by turning temporary DJ Charlie Tenniel into a household name. And if he's willing to help cure her breakup blues with a rebound fling, that's an added bonus. Charlie just wants to kick back, play good tunes and eat Chinese food. He's not interested in becoming famous. But he is interested in Allie. And after all, what harm is a little chemistry between friends? But suddenly their one-night stand has become a four-week addiction. Night after night on the airwaves, his voice seduces her…and all the other women in town. He's a hit. It looks as if Charlie's solved all Allie's problems…except one. What is she going to do when he leaves?

    It is a world populated by ineffectual wizards and sharp-as-tacks witches, by tired policemen and devious dictators, by reformed thieves and vampires who have sworn to drink no blood. It is a world that is vastly different from our own . . . except when it isn't.Now, in The Wit and Wisdom of Discworld, various nuggets of Pratchett's witty commentary and sagacious observations have been compiled by Pratchett expert Stephen Briggs, a man who, they say, knows even more about Discworld than Terry Pratchett.Within these pages, you'll find musings on:Interior decorating: "It's a fact known throughout the universes that no matter how carefully the colors are chosen, institutional decor ends up as either vomit green, unmentionable brown, nicotine yellow, or surgical appliance pink. By some little-understood process of sympathetic resonance, corridors painted in those colors always smell slightly of boiled cabbage—even if no cabbage is ever cooked in the vicinity." (Equal Rites)Travel: "Any seasoned traveler soon learns to avoid anything wished on them as a 'regional speciality,' because all the term means is that the dish is so unpleasant the people living everywhere else will bite off their own legs rather than eat it. But hosts still press it upon distant guests anyway: 'Go on, have the dog's head stuffed with macerated cabbage and pork noses—it's a regional speciality.'" (The Last Continent)Young men: "And then there was the young male walk. At least women swung only their hips. Young men swung everything, from the shoulders down. You have to try to occupy a lot of space. It makes you look bigger, like a tomcat fluffing his tail. The boys tried to walk big in self-defense against all those other big boys out there. I'm bad, I'm fierce, I'm cool, I'd like a pint of shandy and me mam wants me home by nine." (Monstrous Regiment)Class: "'Old money' meant that it had been made so long ago that the black deeds that had originally filled the coffers were now historically irrelevant. Funny, that; a brigand for a father was something you kept quiet about, but a slave-taking pirate for a great-great-great-grandfather was something to boast of over the port. Time turned the evil bastards into rogues, and rogue was a word with a twinkle in its eye and nothing to be ashamed of." (Making Money). . . and more culled from all the Discworld novels.

    Now he's inherited a billion dollar empire and a stake in a man-made island chain in the Gulf of Mexico. Trying to adjust to his new situation, he and his best friend, Paul Nelson, travel to the islands and soon find themselves being chased by killers, killer hippies and rhinos. They have no training. They can't trust anyone. But, they must escape and stop a plot that threatens America. Will they succeed? Will they live? Are rhinos nocturnal? Find out in Tortugas Rising, an action and adventure comedy by the author of Post-Apocalyptic Nomadic Warriors.

    He was launched to fame with the record-breaking Little Britain, and for a while you couldn't enter a playground without hearing "eh eh eh eh" or "computer says no".But David Walliams is more than a comedian. He's a fascinating and complex person with a sharp intellect, a sensitive disposition and a refreshing honesty. Often described as 'a bundle of contradictions', he has disarmed people by being camp and a ladykiller, a hedonist and a sportsman, aloof and warm. Like many of our comedic geniuses - Frankie Howerd, John Cleese, Kenneth Williams - he has grappled with depression and remains an enigma.His autobiography Camp David is a roller-coaster ride of emotions. It will surprise and entertain, and allow fans and newcomers the privilege of entering David Walliams' uniquely brilliant mind.

    Especially if you live abroad, where your countrymen aren’t exactly famous for, well, blending in. As his beloved homeland goes Brexit bananas, bestselling humourist Paul Hawkins takes on Britishness - how it looks from the outside, how to be British abroad and what you only learn about home once you leave it. In this self-deprecating (and only mildly treacherous) handbook, he reveals the awkward secrets, cultural blind-spots and private oddness of the people he once shared an island with. (Revenge is a dish best served politely, after all…) Part memoir, part cheat-sheet for decoding a nation of well-meaning misfits, The Bloody British is full of hilarious insights about Britishness gleaned (often begrudgingly) from the author’s own time as another country’s foreigner. Featuring invaluable advice for all Brits, expats, brexpats and visitors to the UK alike, including: · The Brit Abroad Language-Speaking Plan · How to be Rude, Politely (the secret world of passive-aggression) · How to be Mean, Nicely (the unwritten rules of successful banter) · … plus an illustrated Integration Guide for British Refugees in Europe (just in case) For all fans of Very British Problems, Douglas Adams and Bill Bryson, it’s the perfect gift for the socially awkward oddball in your life (especially if that socially awkward oddball is you.) Are you ready to meet The Bloody British?

    30,000 first printing."

    But even he, with his penchant for fishnet stockings and stiletto heels, is stunned by the antics of his guests - to say nothing of the Butler who invented the ultimate sex machine.The author also wrote "Iron Maiden".

    In this mock autobiographical collection his mischievous drawings capture life's anxieties and ambitions from the mundane to the surreal. Here, at last, is The Truth about beer, doctors, shadow puppets, lunch, dolphins, boredom, and supernatural forces. Seductively strange and addictively amusing, this edgy little book welcomes the uninitiated and rewards the faithful.

    If you haven't done those things but wish you had, This Is Your Book. If you just want to laugh on a train/sofa/toilet or under your desk at work, This Is Your Book.

    This enchanting collection gathers hundreds of his funniest and wickedest quips in tribute to the exhilarating wit of this great-hearted, infuriatingly conceited, wildly funny, and brilliantly talented Englishman.

    Though there is war and unrest in the world, on August 15th, on a farm in upstate New York, a little concert will go down in history as the most famous music festival of our time: Woodstock. It also happens to be the day Bonnie McMillan and Peter Hampton meet and begin their free-spirited love-filled journey with each other. Fast forward forty-seven years. Bonnie unexpectedly passes after a night of hot sex and is whisked up to Purgatory, ‘The Green Room’ as they call it. Bonnie’s best friend meets her at the pearly green gates and the fun begins, from body sculpting to channeling. Follow Bonnie on her erotically incorrect quest to re-connect with the love of her life. Or at the very least, make sure the sex toys are hidden before the kids start sorting through her things!

    The collection exhibits the madness that engulfs those who descend into cycling obsession, celebrating the average cyclist living in a world defined by the pros. The writings range from fanciful musings concerning the Tao of singlespeeding to lengthy descriptions of end-to-end rides in Britain and Ireland. Mountain biking, road cycling, classic alpine climbs and all sorts of other cycling events are chronicled along the way. Each is written in a lighthearted style designed to bring the reader into the author’s world which is often littered with incident and humour. Within the pages the reader will find a loose ticklist of events to ride, bikes to own and challenges to take on. Each described in the author’s own inimitable style. This latest version comes with added "much better proofreading than last published edition" About the Author Dave Barter is a British cyclist. Excellent we’ve got that out of the way. A non-cycling author of a series of bicycle based reflections would have a hint of incongruity about it. He likes to think of himself as an all rounder having tried many two wheeled disciplines and fallen off most of them. In 2001 he chucked in his job and went cycling. In 2010 he did exactly the same thing again. In between times he’s written a few articles about cycling and a few of them have even made it into print. Dave was born in Ely Hospital in 1966 after his Dad raced floodwater to get his Mum to the ward before the river Ouse burst. This explains why he is always in a rush. Dave lives in deepest Wiltshire with his wife Helen and his children Jake and Holly. Wembley the cat used to reside within the family as well but sadly snuffed it a few years ago. Dave’s fiscal profession is Information Technology. He writes articles to fund bike parts and is currently attempting to finish a number of books. Once he has read them, he’ll turn his attention to his half completed writing projects. Like all good IT practitioners he rarely finishes anything. Obsessive Compulsive Cycling Disorder is the rare exception. Dave has recently published a road cycling route guide to the UK. Great British British Rides is also available from Amazon in paperback format.