The Seven Deadly Virtues: 18 Conservative Writers on Why the Virtuous Life is Funny as Hell


Jonathan V. Last - 2014
    The Seven Deadly Virtues sits down next to readers at the bar, buys them a drink, and an hour or three later, ushers them into the revival tent without them even realizing it.   The book’s contributors include Sonny Bunch, Christopher Buckley, David “Iowahawk” Burge, Christopher Caldwell, Andrew Ferguson, Jonah Goldberg, Michael Graham, Mollie Hemingway, Rita Koganzon, Matt Labash, James Lileks, Rob Long, Larry Miller, P. J. O’Rourke, Joe Queenan, Christine Rosen, and Andrew Stiles. Jonathan V. Last, senior writer at the Weekly Standard, editor of the collection, is also a contributor. All eighteen essays in this book are appearing for the first time anywhere.   In the book’s opening essay, P. J. O’Rourke observes: “Virtue has by no means disappeared. It’s as much in public view as ever. But it’s been strung up by the heels. Virtue is upside down. Virtue is uncomfortable. Virtue looks ridiculous. All the change and the house keys are falling out of Virtue’s pants pockets.”   Here are the virtues everyone (including the book’s contributors) was taught in Sunday school but have totally forgotten about until this very moment.  In this sanctimony-free zone:   • Joe Queenan observes: “In essence, thrift is a virtue that resembles being very good at Mahjong. You’ve heard about people who can do it, but you’ve never actually met any of them.” • P. J. O’Rourke notes: “Fortitude is quaint. We praise the greatest generation for having it, but they had aluminum siding, church on Sunday, and jobs that required them to wear neckties or nylons (but never at the same time). We don’t want those either.” • Christine Rosen writes: “A fellowship grounded in sociality means enjoying the company of those with whom you actually share physical space rather than those with whom you regularly and enthusiastically exchange cat videos.” • Rob Long offers his version of modern day justice: if you sleep late on the weekend, you are forced to wait thirty minutes in line at Costco. • Jonah Goldberg offers: “There was a time when this desire-to-do-good-in-all-things was considered the only kind of integrity: ‘Angels are better than mortals. They’re always certain about what is right because, by definition, they’re doing God’s will.’ Gabriel knew when it was okay to remove a mattress tag and Sandalphon always tipped the correct amount.” • Sonny Bunch dissects forbearance, observing that the fictional Two Minutes Hate of George Orwell’s 1984 is now actually a reality directed at living, breathing people. Thanks, in part, to the Internet, “Its targets are designated by a spontaneously created mob—one that, due to its hive-mind nature—is virtually impossible to call off.”   By the time readers have completed The Seven Deadly Virtues, they won’t even realize that they’ve just been catechized into an entirely different—and better—moral universe.

How To Use The Power Of Prayer


Joseph Murphy - 2012
    Through the study and application of mental laws, you can find the way to health, harmony, peace, and prosperity; scientific prayer is the practice of the Presence of God.

That All May Be Edified: Talks, Sermons & Commentary


Boyd K. Packer - 1982
    That All May Be Edified concentrates on building -- the building of souls.Exquisitely detailed illustrations of basic structural forms introduce the seven sections into which the book is divided: The foundation of the edifice is instruction. Walls of encouragement are lifted up. Comfort spreads a shelter against despair. Windows of enlightenment let in the light of faith. A closed door symbolizes a warning, for there are places that we must not enter if we are to be protected against danger. An exhortation is a buttress to correct error and strengthen the structure. Pure witness becomes the steeple, the capstone, the pinnacle.Each section begins with a specially written commentary and includes some of Elder Packer's most memorable addresses and writings on such timely tops as the plan of salvation, thought control, prayer, miracles, nonmember spouses, family life, marriage, morality, obedience, the arts, the Atonement, and many more. The author's clear expression, creative presentation, and powerful testimony ensure that every reader will indeed be edified.

The Inner Bitch Guide to Men, Relationships, Dating, Etc.


Elizabeth Hilts - 1999
    No more romantic cul-de-sacs. No more saying "Yes" when you mean "No." Don't even pretend you don't know what I'm talkingabout.Your Inner Bitch, that integral, powerful part of you, is essential when you're falling in love, and even more essential when you're falling out of love. Looking for romance? Looking for a date? Looking for a relationship? Let your Inner Bitch be your guide."Remember, lust makes you stupid." --Nicole Hollander

The Gospel at 30,000 Feet


Dieter F. Uchtdorf - 2017
    In this colorful, inviting format, more than 20 of his best-loved stories come together under five major themes: Principles of Flight, Lift, Guidance on the Journey, Weathering the Turbulence, and Our Eternal Destination.

Diary of an Adorable Fat Girl: The Complete, Full-length Novel: For anyone who's ever been on a diet (yes - all of us!)


Bernice Bloom - 2017
    She's also about six stone overweight. When she realises she can't cross her legs, has trouble bending over to tie her shoelaces without wheezing like an elderly chain-smoker, and discovers that even her hands and feet look fat, it's time to take action. But what action? She's tried every diet under the sun. This is the hysterical story of what happens when Mary joins 'Fat Club' where she meets a cast of funny characters and one particular man who catches her eye. The story is laugh-out-loud funny and will resonate with anyone who has dieted, tried to keep up with any sort of exercise programme or spent 10 minutes in a changing room trying to extricate herself from a way too-small garment that she ambitiously tried on and is now completely stuck in. Bernice Bloom is the big, new name in comedy writing...this is the first full-length novel after her series of laugh-out-loud mini books.

When Heaven Invades Earth Devotional & Journal


Bill Johnson - 2005
    It focuses on walking in the divine as a lifestyle, shaping one's attitudes and worldview.

Works by David Sedaris: Naked, When You Are Engulfed in Flames, Me Talk Pretty One Day, Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim


Books LLC - 2010
    Purchase includes a free trial membership in the publisher's book club where you can select from more than a million books without charge. Chapters: Naked, When You Are Engulfed in Flames, Me Talk Pretty One Day, Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim, Holidays on Ice, Santaland Diaries, Barrel Fever. Source: Wikipedia. Free updates online. Not illustrated. Excerpt: Naked, published in 1997, is a collection of essays by American humorist David Sedaris. The book details Sedaris life, from his unusual upbringing in the suburbs of Raleigh, North Carolina, to his booze-and-drug-ridden college years, to his Kerouacian wandering as a young adult. The book became a best-seller and was acclaimed for its wit, dark humor and irreverent tackling of tragic events, including the death of Sedaris mother. Prior to publication, several of the essays were read by the author on the NPR program This American Life. About the early life of the Sedaris family, and David's hopes to one day be rich and famous. It is revealed that the family is actually middle class. A description of Sedaris' obsessive-compulsive and Tourettic tendencies as a child. His behavior quirks include licking light switches and kissing newspapers, and they frequently land him in trouble at school. These tendencies are abandoned when he begins smoking at college. An account of Sedaris' elderly (and slightly senile) grandmother, known as Ya-Ya. After suffering an injury she is forced to live with his family, resulting in tension for all. Eventually, at the urging of Sedaris' mom (who was against Ya-Ya moving in with the family in the first place), she is put into a low-grade nursing home. When she dies, only his father seems to mourn. A description of events regarding a pornographic book that Sedaris finds when he is a child. The book is passed between his siblings, and eventually confiscated by his mother, who in turn reads it. A description of...More: http: //booksllc.net/?id=89168

Covenant Keepers


Wendy Watson Nelson - 2016
    She teaches us how we can ask for angels to help us and those we love; how our premortal covenants can help us make meaning out of the anguishing experiences of this mortal life; how the covenant of sacrifice and the covenant of service, and even the very words of our covenants, can give us access to power we may have been overlooking.Encouraging us to participate in a 21-day experiment that changed the lives of stressed-out young mothers, Sister Nelson takes us behind the scenes into a most unexpected journey she personally has been on, sharing three truths that now compel her life.

The Best Joke Book (Period): Hundreds of the Funniest, Silliest, Most Ridiculous Jokes Ever


William Donohue - 2014
    Inside, you'll find hundreds of jokes that are guaranteed to stir up a room full of smiles, including knock-knocks, witty puns, and one-liners. Complete with hilarious quotes from celebrities like Jon Stewart, Lewis Black, and Jerry Seinfeld, everyone will revel in each gut-busting moment.So whether you're looking to add a few jokes to your repertoire, impress your buds, or improve your banter, this sidesplitting book arms you with the perfect joke for any occasion!

The Fall of the Roman Umpire


Ron Luciano - 1986
    Illustrated with 16 pages of photographs.

A Mormon Mother


Annie Clark Tanner - 2008
    

Confessions of a She-Fan: The Course of True Love with the New York Yankees


Jane Heller - 2009
    Her words inflamed the passions of sports lovers across the country, and her piece quickly became the newspaper's most e-mailed and talked-about article in the week it ran. The intense reaction of fans forced Heller to look inward, and to re-examine her feelings about winning and losing. Was she a "bandwagon" fan, as some branded her? A traitor? Confessions of a She-Fan is a witty, observant, and decidedly female look at the nature of the bond between fan and team. Jane Heller goes in search of answers. With her husband as her traveling partner, she literally follows the Bronx Bombers through the rest of their challenging 2007 season, hoping to score interviews with the players, watch every game in every city, and inject some excitement into her marriage. Through interactions with other fans, as well as members of the media covering the Yankees, plus game-by-game analyses, Heller learns personal life lessons about competition, loyalty, and acceptance--and about why baseball, like any truly romantic relationship, requires commitment, patience, and a deep, abiding love.