A collection of 45 ridiculous 911 emergency calls, submitted by 911 Call Center Operators across the U.S.Dedicated to you, the Taxpayer who funded these calls.Note: A quick 10-minute read of humorous quotes from real calls.Just enough for a grin of the day!

    For more than twenty years and from Blackwood, Wales to Tokyo, Japan, Nicky Wire has kept a personal visual history of the band in their various stages from Generation Terrorists through Holy Bible and right up to last year's remarkable album, Postcards from a Young Man. Edited down from over 1,000 of Wire's personal polaroids and with accompanying text by the man himself, Death of The Polaroid promises to be a rich, visual biography of one of the most loved and iconoclastic British bands of the past two decades.

    Emergencies:--when to call your child's physician immediately-what to do in case of burns, bites, stings, poisoning, choking, and injuriesCommon Illnesses:-when it's safe to treat your child at home-step-by-step instructions on dealing with fever, infections, allergies, rashes, earaches, croup and other common ailmentsBehavior Problems:-proven strategies for colic, sleep disturbances, toilet training problems, thumbsucking, and the video game craze-no-nonsense discipline techniques for biting, temper tantrums, sibling fighting, and school refusalHealth Promotion: From Birth Through Adolescence:-essential advice on newborn baby care, nutrition, cholesterol testing, immunizations, and sex education-ways of preventing spoiled children, picky eaters, overeating, tooth decay, accidents, and homework problems

    Together they provide a complete painting programme.

    100 color illustrations.

    Throughout his life, Churchill painted to relieve his mind from the demands of leadership—and to stave off depression. Included in this volume are Churchill’s meditations on painting as a salve for the spirit and an important method of relaxation—particularly for people under considerable stress over a long period of time. In addition, it includes 18 reprints of Churchill’s original work in oil, giving the reader a window into the little-known creative and artistic talent of this prominent figure in contemporary history. ABOUT THE AUTHOR Sir Winston Churchill was awarded the Nobel Prize in Literature in 1953 “for his mastery of historical and biographical description as well as for brilliant oratory in defending exalted human values.” Over a 64-year span, Churchill published over 40 books, many multi-volume definitive accounts of historical events to which he was a witness and participant. All are beautifully written and as accessible and relevant today as when first published. During his fifty-year political career, Churchill served twice as Prime Minister in addition to other prominent positions—including President of the Board of Trade, First Lord of the Admiralty, Chancellor of the Exchequer, and Home Secretary. In the 1930s, Churchill was one of the first to recognize the danger of the rising Nazi power in Germany and to campaign for rearmament in Britain. His leadership and inspired broadcasts and speeches during World War II helped strengthen British resistance to Adolf Hitler—and played an important part in the Allies’ eventual triumph. One of the most inspiring wartime leaders of modern history, Churchill was also an orator, a historian, a journalist, and an artist. All of these aspects of Churchill are fully represented in this collection of his works. ABOUT THE SERIES When the Conservative government was defeated in Britain’s 1929 general election, Winston Churchill was exiled from the party—chiefly because of his disagreements with party leaders over Indian Home Rule and protective tariffs, as well as his connections with financiers, press barons, and others who were not trusted by Conservative leadership. This period, between 1929 and 1939, came to be known as Churchill’s “wilderness years.” During this time, he focused on his writing—and served as an important voice for British armament against the rise of Hitler. Many of his works published during this time—including collections of newspaper articles and one very rare short story—are considered lost classics in the Churchill canon.

    Each single-sided page includes such agression-relieving words as 'Shitballs', 'Twat Waffle' and 'Asshat' laid over therapeutic, mandala and nature inspired patterns. The #1 Gag Gift for Friends with a Sense of Humor! Introducing the world's first swear word coloring book printed on black paper. You've never experienced anything like this before. This bestselling adult coloring book features 40 classic swear words. Using this beautiful midnight edition will make your designs vibrant with color. Never again worry about coloring inside the lines... let the black paper take care of it! Unwind and relax with this beautiful coloring book... let your steam loose! What's Inside - 40 Classic Swear Words to Color (see list below) - Beautiful Abstract Designs with Intricate Details - Each Swear Word Is Printed on Black Paper - Includes Free PDF Bonus Inside! Sometimes, you just need to SWEAR at someone... List of Words - Bullshit - Fuck - Piss Off - Asshole - Bitch - Slut - Whore - Cunt - Bastard - Douche - Shit - Damn - Shitballs - Sugartits - Twat Waffle - Baggy Vag - Piss Flaps - Bollocks - Crap - Fuckwit - Fucktard - Dipshit - Shit-a-brick - Wanker - Beaver Dam - Cum Guzzler - Cuntcake - Asshat - Gutter Slut - Skank - Prick - Slutbag - Moron - Fuck Off - Idiot - Twunt - Dickhead - Cockbag - Fucknugget - Cunt Muffin Join the foulmouthed masses and unwind with Release Your Anger. Color designs featuring both classic swear words like -Bullshit- and more creative ones like -Cum Guzzler-. Each page is designed with beautiful patterns, swirls, paisleys, mandalas, flowers, and leaves... color away while letting the steam out. Simply sit back, relax, and choose the swear word that connects with you. Then color in the swear word with your choice of color pencil, pen, marker, and/or crayon. Enjoy mindfulness and relaxation with this brilliant anti-stress therapy, also the perfect gag-gift! This beautiful coloring book features: - 40 Classic and Angry Swear Words to Color - Beautiful Designs with Intricate Details - Designs Printed on Black Paper - 40 Single-Sided Pages at 8.5 x 11- - Includes Digital PDF Bonus Inside the Book Order now and get started. Your inner peace is waiting, and it has some choice words for you. Preview the book at swearybook.com/midnight TAGS: black coloring book, midnight coloring book, black adult coloring book, midnight adult coloring book, sweary coloring book, swear word coloring book, swear words adult coloring book, bullshit book, bullshit coloring book, james alexander, memos to shitty people, calm the fuck down, chill the fuck out, sasha o'hara, james alexander, donald trump

    While it embodies the entire system of his teaching, with much technical advice and critical comment for the student, it also contains inspiration for those to whom the happiness to be found through all the arts is important.No other American painter attracted such a large, intensely personal group of followers as Henri, whose death in 1929 brought to an end a life that has been completely devoted to art. He was an inspired artist and teacher who believed that everyone is vitally concerned in the happiness and wisdom to be found through the arts. Many of his paintings have been acquired by museums and private collectors. Among them are the Baltimore Museum of Art, the Metropolitan Museum of Art, the National Gallery of Art, the Whitney Museum of American Art, the Wichita Art Museum, and Yale University Art Gallery.

    With the same direct, easy-to-follow approach of Juliette Aristides's previous books, Lessons in Classical Painting presents aspiring artists with the fundamental skills and tools needed to master painting in the atelier style. With more than 25 years of experience in ateliers and as an art instructor, Aristides pairs personal examples and insights with theory, assignments and demonstrations for readers, discussions of technical issues, and inspirational quotes. After taking a bird's eye look at painting as a whole, Aristides breaks down painting into big picture topics like grisaille, temperature, and color, demonstrating how these key subjects can be applied by all painters.

    How to Fish is a gem of a book that gets to the heart of the passion for angling: that there's more to fishing than catching fish.

    More comprehensive than ever before--and now 1,000 pages--this revised edition describes the insider dynamics at hundreds of U.S. and Canadian publishers, with hundreds of names and specialties for book acquisition editors. Nearly 200 of the most powerful literary agents reveal invaluable tips, as if they were having a private conversation with a special friend. With detailed information on what to do (and what not to do) to break the code, break down the walls, and get that first book, second book, or thirtieth book published, bought and read, Jeff Herman's Guide is the go-to source for writers everywhere.

    They were the rank underdogs and they swept to victory on an unprecedented tide of goodwill that washed over the nation. Only Martin Flanagan could bring to life this particular miracle. The club's two guiding spirits - captain Bob Murphy and coach Luke Beveridge - welcomed him in, Beveridge making available his match diaries, pre-match notes and video highlights. Flanagan interviewed every player, watched every match, talked with the trainers, the women in the football department, the fans who never miss a training session, the cheer squad.What Flanagan shows is that the Bulldogs found a new way to play partly because they found a new way to be a team - a new way to support each other, even a new way to be. A Wink from the Universe takes us into the heart of the community Luke Beveridge and Bob Murphy dreamt into being with the support of the Bulldog people around them. This is a classic of sportswriting - a book for fans of the club, and of the game, but also a book for anyone who wants to know how a group of people can will a miracle to happen.

    Learn how to choose and mix colors, and create a multitude of effects using only one set of tubes. Discover how to make your own equipment, set up a "studio" space, and use household materials to save money. Beginners can follow processes stage-by-stage, while more experienced artists can dip in and out for help with specific problems. A unique section on how to develop your art and take it to a wider public is full of professional secrets which can bring you success much more quickly. “Try it” and “Fix it” panels placed throughout the book suggest ways of practicing and developing new skills, and avoiding or correcting common painting errors.

    when, finally reconciled to the inevitable, they returned to Italy one last time.Which, as they say, is another story.Also includes chapters on the idiosyncrasies of the Italian language and the Italian driving experience.

    To millions of football fans across America, he was the “Voice of the NFL.” And as open and giving as Harry Kalas was throughout his professional and personal life, there are countless layers of the man that have remained unknown . . . until now. Author Randy Miller interviewed more than 160 people—including all of Harry’s surviving family, many of his close friends from childhood to present, numerous colleagues from baseball and the NFL, and even Harry’s longtime personal psychologist—to craft a loving and shockingly honest portrayal of one of the most celebrated broadcasters in the history of sports. With incredible details from all phases of his life—from his upbringing in the Chicago suburbs, to his Hall of Fame broadcasting career in baseball, to his ubiquitous voiceover work with the NFL, to his personal vices for drinking and women, to his legendary friendship with Richie “Whitey” Ashburn, to his ongoing feud with on-air partner Chris Wheeler— Harry the K: The Remarkable Life of Harry Kalas will surprise, delight, and enlighten all fans of the man they called “Harry the K.”