Those who still believe in them are often wildly misinformed. So what do you think will happen when Johnny McNormalpants finds himself face to face with a bloodthirsty vampire? Probably crap his pants, but then what? An informed citizen would know exactly what to do in this situation. If only there was some way to enlighten the public about this often forgotten subject, preferably in the form of a mock informative guide or something. From Matt Melvin, one of the creators of Explosm.net and the hit online comic Cyanide & Happiness, comes Dracula Is A Racist, the definitive guide to vampires, answering those gravely important questions that keep you up at night. . . Was Dracula really a racist?How do vampires do their hair if they don't have any reflection?Is it gross for immortals to be attracted to high school girls if they're stuck in a 17-year-old body?Was Sesame Street ever truly safe from The Count?Is dressing in all black and acting snobby toward everyone enough to fake being a vampire?Just how much more badass are vampires than zombies?Dracula Is A Racist is the essential vampire handbook that digs up all the dirt and backs it up with hard vampirical evidence. That's totally true. Really. Matt Melvin is a 25-year-old T-shirt aficionado and sideburn enthusiast. Along with three other dudes, he runs Explosm.net, a pretty awesome website full of awesome things. When not adding even more filth to the Internet, he enjoys criticizing and complaining about movies, listening to music and inventing obscure types of niche sexual acts. He currently lives in San Diego. He is very tall."

     He has spent six years living the quiet life in the suburbs after losing his job as Lord of Hell and now he thinks it’s time to indulge in all that life has to offer. Whether it’s dating the older woman, demonstrating supreme loyalty to his local coffee shop or fighting the scourge of the lollipop lady, Clovenhoof knows how to enjoy himself to the fullest. Join Clovenhoof as he continues his year-long journey to tackle the big issues in life.

    Here's what you'll find in this issue:"Jenny's House" is a great place to play, but an unexpected playmate makes for a dark session of show-and-tell.Three kids seek to steal from a traveling carnival and get more than they bargained for in "A Lullaby for Caliban"In "The Last Nephew", Nephew yearns to be free of Uncle's depredations, but when Uncle leaves his pocket watch behind one night, it gives him the key to his escape.Crossing "The Cornfield" is harrowing on the best of winter nights, but this night, Jack turns to see eyes in the darkness, and knows that something is following him...In "The Ginger Men", mother is baking a special ingredient into a treat for father, an ingredient that gives her pie dough a life of its own. Featuring stories by Ada Hoffmann, Julie Jansen, Mark Onspaugh, Mike Trier, and Elizabeth Twist.Be sure to check out the other volumes in this ongoing anthology series, and watch for new volumes coming soon!

    GRAPHIC GORE. GRAPHIC SNARK. What would you do if you received a three-week warning of the coming zombie apocalypse? How would you prepare? What if the warning was wrong - and the undead rose a full week before you were ready?Joe Daniels may be luckier than most, but heʼs still in a jam. After weeks of prepping, he gets caught in a zombie storm. To accomplish his plans and stay alive, he has to rescue his wife, Clare, and travel 1,300 miles through Americaʼs zombie-infested countryside to the safety of northern Michigan.But, first, he has to battle his way out of New Orleans. With his cat, Azazel, in tow.Bloodbath in the Big Easy is the first book in the Zombie Chaos series. If you like the drama of The Walking Dead, the gore of Romeroʼs Dead series, and the humor of Shaun of the Dead, follow Joe on his journey through zombie-filled New Orleans.Join the survivors and pick up a copy of Zombie Chaos Book 1 today.

    * New Edition. * Includes a new translation of 'Fotikchand'.

    For fans of Stephen King, David Gerrold, and Richard Matheson, picture this: the world is being eaten by monsters and there’s nothing you can do about it.

    Death and Dark Dreams. Monsters and Mayhem. Literary Vision and Wonder. Each volume of the +Horror Library+ series is packed with heart-pounding thrills and creepy contemplations as to what truly lurks among the shadows of the world(s) we live in.Containing 33 stories, read “The Best of Volumes 1–5” in this ongoing anthology series, and then continue with the other volumes.Shamble no longer through the banal humdrum of normalcy, but ENTER THE HORROR LIBRARY!Included within “The Best of Volumes 1–5”:• In “The Station,” a married couple discover an abandoned gas station where corpses tell the future. • In “Trapped Light Medium,” a tabloid photographer is able to foresee the future and be present at the perfect moment to capture on film horrifying events.• In “Footprints Fading in the Desert,” a woman stranded in the desert finds a barefoot savior who promises help.• . . . and more!

    

    In this creepy tale, the twist comes with the very last word…

    When environmental consultant Jack McDarvid's boss is killed in a shootout near the Capitol, McDarvid becomes enmeshed in a diabolical plot behind the scenes of the environmental movement.

    A new outbreak is about to begin. The world's most deadly disease is loose, and anyone who catches it is doomed. Symptoms include coughing, sneezing, abdominal pain, and rotting of the flesh. There is no cure. Infection is 100% fatal. Stay calm. Please do not panic. The situation is under control. It is under control. The Peeling & Other Terrifying Tales is a collection of novellas and short stories from bestselling horror author Iain Rob Wright. It begins with the 80-page novella THE PEELING, and also includes several short stories, most of which have never been published before. Full table of contents below: 1. THE PEELING 2018 (novella) 2. THE PEELING OF SAMUEL LLOYD COLLINS 3. THE PEELING OMNIBUS (5 previously released novellas set in The Peeling universe) 4. EHLLF (short story) 5. VLOG LIFE (short story) 6. HEIRLOOMS (short story) 7. THE EAGLE & THE WOLF (short story) 8. CHICKEN BOY (short story) 9. THE WITNESS (short story) 10. THE BOB SAGA (1 previously released short story & 1 previously unpublished) "Iain Rob Wright scares the Hell out of me!" - J. A. Konrath "Iain Rob Wright is sick and twisted." - David Moody "A master of the genre." - Matt Shaw

    A young man finds out from a fortune teller that there’s always a price to be paid. A rich man doesn’t quite have the 25th high school reunion experience he expected. Beware of strangers on a train. A dog may not be man’s best friend. An aging hitman takes a trip down memory lane.

    Please note this is the only release of these titles in hardback, as the mass market release for all three title was done in PB only. Includes - The Joiner King, The Unseen Queen, and The Swarm War.

    This genre-spanning collection of 16 short stories features familiar characters like Kate and Jim, Liam and Wy, and Bill and Moses, but also ranges farther afield than many readers will expect, leaping from modern-day Anchorage to 22nd-century Mars to the fantasy kingdom of Mnemosynea. Remarkably disparate, but indisputably Stabenow, whose fertile imagination is anything but predictable.Titles in this collection: "Nooses Give," "Conspiracy," "Under the Influence," "Wreck Rights," "Cherchez la Femme," "Siren Song," "The Eyak Interpreter," "Any Taint of Vice," "On the Evidence," "Missing, Presumed…," "The Perfect Gift," "Gold Fever," "Cheechako," "No Place Like Home," "Justice is a Two-edged Sword," and "A Woman’s Work."

     Do you like puppets? Well, we have a marvelous one. This poor little thing was left all alone to die, only to wake up with a taste for revenge. If smiling, red-nosed clowns bore you, you’ve come to the right place. Just follow the bloody path of mutilated clowns, and it will lead you to a room filled with gruesome revelations. But that’s not all. Ready for a mind-bending experience? Wonderful! Our contortionist won’t just showcase her extreme flexibility, she’ll also shock you with her insatiable appetite. Want to know her secret? She’s cursed—but shhhhhh, don’t tell. So grab your friends and join us as we create the most bone-chilling atmosphere. Because we’re coming to your town… …and we’re bringing the Carnival of Fear.