My twelve-year-old daughter frequently moans that Ballycarrick is the most boring town in Ireland.Nothing ever happens here.She’s right.And as the local police sergeant, this is something I’m delighted about.I’ve enough to worry about - the polar ice-caps, the evil monster that’s shrinking my trousers, not to mention the hot flushes - without having to be like one of those gritty Netflix cops, chasing criminals down alleyways and busting drug deals.So, life is calm and fairly predictable.Until something unthinkable happens in our sleepy backwater.A crime, but not like anything I've ever seen before.It's a complete mystery.And it's up to me to solve it.

     So many times in the career of law enforcement officers, you end up saying "You just can't make this stuff up!" So, here are some insights as to the sorts of things that we have laid eyes on or experienced that we hope you'll enjoy! Please be aware that the stories in this book are REAL and some involve recounting nudity or other PG-16+ situations that you may want to consider if you find such real situations (that cops see and have to learn to laugh at) offensive.

    The outrageous humor of cult favorite and syndicated cartoonist Lynda Barry--one of the world's "shrewdest chroniclers of sex, love and romance" (Mother Jones).

    We find in Beckett's masterful, exquisite prose, the familiar themes from his earlier works here expressed in the anguished murmurings of the solitary human consciousness.

    The planes break, the regs break, metal gets bent, students are lost at sea, and a Top Gun wannabe student, who has four hundred hours of flight instruction, still hasn’t made his first solo flight. “CFI! The Book” is an over-the-top satirical aviation comedy that’s loosely based on real world experiences of flight instruction, but if the FAA asks, this is all strictly fictional.

    This omnibus brings together the first three Reginald Perrin novels containing a lifetime's outrageous and hilarious adventures.When we first meet Reggie, he is sick to death with selling exotic ices at Sunshine Desserts. Driven to desperation by the rat race and the unpunctuality of Britain's trains, Reggie's small eccentricites escalate to the extreme, until finally he leaves the unacceptable face of capitalism behind by driving off in a stolen motorised jelly. In his pursuit of the unconventional, he devotes himself to faking his own death, opening a shop devoted to selling completely useless goods, and setting up a commune strictly for the middle-class and middle-aged.Join Reggie, who didn't get where he is today without some help from some memorable supporting characters, in one man's quest to avoid an everyday existence.

    You may very well find that getting frustrated and enraged might be the only way to get things changed around here.To help you achieve a new state of mild motivation, Screw Calm and Get Angry brings together several centuries of embattled and embittered epithets. It would seem that across the world and across the centuries, there is plenty of evidence to suggest you're not alone in bemoaning the way the odds are stacked:* On Politics: "The word 'politics' is derived from the word 'poly,' meaning 'many,' and the word 'ticks,' meaning 'blood sucking parasites.'" --Larry Hardiman* On Work: "By working faithfully eight hours a day, you may eventually get to be a boss and work twelve hours a day." --Robert Frost* On Money: "The easiest way for your children to learn about money is for you not to have any." --Katherine Whitehorn* On Business: "Nothing is illegal if a hundred businessmen decide to do it, and that's true anywhere in the world." --Andrew Young* On War: "You can't say civilization don't advance...for in every war they kill you a new way." --Will Rogers* On Life: "If you wake up and you're not in pain, you know you're dead." --Russian proverbA parody of the famed Keep Calm and Carry On British motivational poster, and featuring the same successful format as our best-selling Keep Calm and Carry On book, Screw Calm and Get Angry is destined to be the motivational mantra for the realists of the world!

    Each volume is painstakingly edited by the San Francisco Cartoon Art Museum's Bill Blackbeard, the world's foremost authority on early 20th Century American comic strips, and designed by Jimmy Corrigan author Chris Ware. In addition to the 104 full-page black-and-white Sunday strips from 1929 and 1930 (Herriman did not use color until 1935), the book includes an introduction by Blackbeard and reproductions of rare Herriman ephemera from Ware's own extensive collection, as well as annotations and other notes by Ware and Blackbeard.Of special note to collectors, this is the period when Herriman was again liberated from the "grid" constraints of the mid-'20s and was able to compose his pages far more creatively, resulting in richer, more complex, more eye-pleasing compositions. Krazy Kat is a love story, focusing on the relationships of its three main characters. Krazy Kat adored Ignatz Mouse. Ignatz Mouse just tolerated Krazy Kat, except for recurrent onsets of targeting tumescence, which found expression in the fast delivery of bricks to Krazy's cranium. Offisa Pup loved Krazy and sought to protect "her" (Herriman always maintained that Krazy was gender-less) by throwing Ignatz in jail. Each of the characters was ignorant of the others' true motivations, and this simple structure allowed Herriman to build entire worlds of meaning into the actions, building thematic depth and sweeping his readers up by the looping verbal rhythms of Krazy & Co.'s unique dialogue.

    Entwhistle may look like your sweet, old granny...but things happen to her: she's caught up in the witness protection program, stuck in an elevator with an assortment of strangers, her house is burglarized and her dog is kidnapped. But Mrs. Entwhistle is dauntless; she didn't get to be a fesity seventy-eight by wimping out. Come join her on her porch swing, meet her best friend, Maxine, and her dog, Roger. Maxine will probably offer you a bowl of her homemade soup. Sit a while. Come back when you can.

    Afterward, the doctor comes out with the results."I'm afraid I have some very bad news," the doctor says. "You're dying, and you don't have much time left.""Oh, that's terrible!" says the man. "Give it to me straight, Doc. How long have I got?""Ten," the doctor says sadly."Ten?" the man asks. "Ten what? Months? Weeks? What?!""Nine..."

    The manuscript is comprised of the lyrics to Denis Leary's popular Christmas song of the same title (plus three new verses written for this book), and includes 25 newly commissioned illustrations in the style of classic stop-motion TV Christmas specials.

    Technically brilliant, using strict, classical prosody, yet entirely modern in sensibility, Virginia Adair's poetry will play a central role in the ongoing American poetry renaissance.

    The bloke can write. He rhapsodizes about heroin better than anyone since Jim Carroll. With the flick of his enviable pen, he can summarize childhood thus: ‘My very first utterance in life was not a single word, but a sentence. It was, ‘Don’t do that.’... Russell Brand has a compelling story." — New York Times Book ReviewThe gleeful and candid New York Times bestselling autobiography of addiction, recovery, and rise to fame from Russell Brand, star of Forgetting Sarah Marshall and one of the biggest personalities in comedy today.Picking up where he left off in My Booky Wook, movie star and comedian Russell Brand details his rapid climb to fame and fortune in a shockingly candid, resolutely funny, and unbelievably electrifying tell-all: Booky Wook 2. Brand’s performances in Arthur, Get Him to the Greek, and Forgetting Sarah Marshall have earned him a place in fans’ hearts; now, with a drop of Chelsea Handler’s Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang, a dash of Tommy Lee’s Dirt, and a spoonful of Nikki Sixx’s The Heroin Diaries, Brand goes all the way—exposing the mad genius behind the audacious comic we all know (or think we know) and love (or at least, lust).