Steven went first. He was kind of our test subject. Like those monkeys that NASA sent off into space in the fifties, all the while knowing they’d never make it back.And now another poor rocket is ready to launch.But this isn’t just any posh New York wedding. You’ve seen my friends, you’ve met our families, you know you're in for a treat. Everyone wants their wedding to be memorable. This one’s going to be un-frigging-forgettable.Holy Frigging Matrimony takes place about a year after Tangled’s end and is from Drew’s POV.

    Or until I fell in love. Whichever came first. How hard could one year of swipes and matches and awkward first dates be? In a word: bad. In nine words: bad and also hilarious, demoralizing, exhausting, and ridiculously amusing.But the only thing worse than dating in the era of hookup apps and unsolicited dick pics is the absolute whole-life-flail of falling in love.Listening Length: 8 hours and 15 minutes

    How charming. That is, unless you have the misfortune of finding yourself in an English Murder Village, where danger lurks around each picturesque cobblestone corner and every sip of tea may be your last. If you insist on your travels, do yourself a favor and bring a copy of this little book. It may just keep you alive. Brought to life with dozens of Gorey-esque drawings by illustrator Jay Cooper and peppered with allusions to classic crime series and unmistakably British murder lore, Your Guide to Not Getting Murdered in a Quaint English Village gives you the tools you need to avoid the same fate, should you find yourself in a suspiciously cozy English village (or simply dream of going). Good luck, and whatever you do, avoid the vicar.

    With topics such as pointless professional development where the author learned how to make bird noises, insanely incompetent teachers who make the good ones look bad, the shit parades that are parent conferences, lack of discipline even for kids who attack people with weapons, outrageous parent requests such as checking the size and color of a teenager's poop, this follow-up to the wildly popular memoir Teacher Misery does not disappoint! Think the stories in Teacher Misery were crazy? Just wait till you read More Teacher Misery!"Morris opens up about the comical misery that has become the teaching profession-giving a voice to teachers everywhere." Parent Herald"One of the funniest teacher books you'll ever read!" Bored Teachers"The stories that Morris tells about the school system are riveting. The antics and violence and outright stupidity that she and other teachers have had to endure are outright insane -- some of it is so crazy it's almost unbelievable." Mission Incomplete"A must read for every single human being on this world, from teachers to parents, students, administrators,  just name it. Let me be honest, nonfiction kind of book is not my cup of tea, but this book is simply amazing, hilarious, keep surprising me non stop!" Jessica's Book Blog"This one is just the most hilarious and heart-breaking ever! Laugh out loud funny!" Teachers Are Terrific"Her stories are so ridiculous, that a non-educator might actually believe they're fabricated. Unfortunately, those of us who are on the inside know it's all too real. Her stories are laugh out loud funny, touching, and at times, maddening." Having a Mom Moment"This book is a great read and a real eye-opener." Carpe Librum"I recommend this book for many reasons. Morris is a great writer who did a great job at presenting her case. She is funny and entertaining. She is above all honest with her interpretation and the things that she sees around her. I liked the variation in text and material. Overall, this books needs to be spread around the country. She isn't the only person that feels this way. There are thousands of other people out there like her and their voices need to be heard." The Next Book on my List"This book was a HILARIOUS read!" The Simply Organized Teacher"I dare you not to laugh out loud!" Robin O'Bryant, New York Times bestselling author of Ketchup is a Vegetable and Other Lies Moms Tell Themselves "Jane is a gifted storyteller, you will chuckle and you will sig. The perfect gift for your kid's teacher or a teacher friend!" Joyce Kaufman, EdD, Host of The Joyce Kaufman Show, Newstalk 850 WFTL "Jane Morris gives us a beautifully written exposé about the worst sides of today's students, parents and school administrators." Bruce Tulgan, bestselling author of Not Everyone Gets a Trophy: How to Manage the Millenials "Jane Morris lifts the curtain on the horror teachers in our country face every day." Laurie Notaro, New York Times bestselling author of The Idiot Girls' Action-Adventure Club "The stories Morris tells are unbelievable and yet, I'm positive they're true." Jen Mann, New York Times bestselling author of People I Want to Punch in the Throat "Morris dishes on the truth about trying to teach in this culture and it is hilarious, informative, and insightful." Stefanie Wilder Taylor, New York Times bestselling author of Sippy Cups Are Not for Chardonnay "A compelling answer to anyone thoughtless enough to assert that teachers have it easy.

    Working two jobs and pursuing her degree takes all of her time. Besides, the guys she has dated haven't been much better than the random barfly.It's a good thing Luke's body is honed by the long hours of carpentry and construction because he carries the weight of his family on his shoulders. School hasn't been an option for him since he dropped out to make the house payments his mother had failed to make. Luke finds what he's been longing for in a night with Savannah. She's determined to stop with a one-night stand, but he wants more. Neither can deny the perfection of their passionate interludes, but with such imperfect lives, do they have any chance for a future together? Suddenly she's losing her heart and it's all happening much too fast.Not recommended for readers under age 18 due to language and sexual content.

     “Absolutely hilarious! One of the funniest books of the year.” The Guardian “Guaranteed to leave you in stitches.” The Boston Globe “I once stabbed a stripper in the car park of Paradise City Gentlemen’s Club. Her body is buried in a field at coordinates 38°51'40.1"N 78°51'41.2"W.” JM, senior citizen

     Poppy Porter's ex is getting married ... to her ex best friend. To land her dream job of partner in the most prestigious firm on the Upper East Side, Poppy must now pull double shifts as their wedding planner and maid of honor. And the icing on a truly craptastic cake? Leo Nass. Handsome, infuriating, womanizer, and … the best man. Despite their longstanding loathing, Poppy doesn't see Leo coming. Literally. One ruined cake. One archnemesis. One hour to save the wedding. Can they put their hatred aside long enough to save Poppy’s job and Bridezilla's head from exploding? Piece of cake, right?

    He’s the biggest player of them all.They shouldn’t be together. But this summer’s just too tempting.Sixteen-year-old Emilia Moretti’s goal for the summer is simple: forget her brother’s best friend—Nick Grawsky—ever existed. It should be easy: He’s spending his summer in the Hamptons, adding girls in tiny bikinis to his list of broken hearts. Guarantee he won’t be telling them they’re like his little sisters. This summer, Emilia won’t stay awake at night thinking about him. She’ll need flawless ballet movements to have a shot at next year’s showcase, and she’s finally ready to search for her birth parents. But when Nick decides to stay in the city, Emilia’s resolve disappears in a pirouette. Maybe it’s the spin they needed to be together. As long as she doesn’t get stuck believing in happily ever after…Nick is tired of pretending to be the happy, let’s-have-fun guy. His father wants him to change his career from professional dancer to…lawyer. He needs to put all of his focus on dancing to prove to Daddy Dearest he’s good enough to make it big. And he may have a case of the bluest balls in history courtesy of Emilia. She’s off-limits: The bro code with Roberto even forbids the dirty thoughts he has about her. Besides, he’s not boyfriend material. He only has time for flings, for girls who don’t expect much, for girls he doesn’t want to kiss goodnight. He knows he should resist her, but he’s not sure he wants to…At least for this summer.It’s going to be a summer like no other. Companion novella of ONE, TWO, THREE

    . .Ellen’s figured out that finding the right guy is all about compatibility. That’s why she signs up for Detailed Dating—the local online dating scene in Sacramento. They ask men the hard questions, compare their answers with hers, then she filters through the profiles of each provided “match.” After numerous email exchanges, she narrows it down to two promising candidates she’s excited to meet in person. When Ellen’s best friend asks her for a favor, dog-sitting leads to disaster and Ellen ends up at the local vet where she meets a man she can’t get out of her mind. Henry isn’t a logical choice, but she finds herself paying for dog obedience class to spend more time with him. Ellen knows that in order to have a lasting relationship, she should take the safe route and go for one of the pre-screened guys. But, how can she think with her head when her heart keeps begging her to give Henry a chance?

    No commitment. No strings. Now she’s found the perfect guy — and it’s not me. I should move on, but I need her. And I never back down from a fight. Now I've got one last lesson for her: I’m going to make her mine.

     Quick! Knock on the barn wood because the fates are not finished with Anabel yet! She still has the wedding extravaganza, the huge reception dance, and her favorite part--the much anticipated wedding night ahead of her, where the new bride will get the most shocking wedding present imaginable! Did Anabel marry the man of her dreams, if she was the kind a girl who had wedding man dreams, or was marrying Luke Drake the deadliest mistake of her life? A Wedding Written in the Stars will delight you and then stun you to the toes of your seriously sexy, fancy, high-heeled wedding reception shoes! (Author's Note: A Wedding Written in the Stars was written to entertain an adult audience.)

    Reception to follow. The Summer family comes together once more as the final sister prepares to tie the knot. Take a journey with each couple, from the rehearsal to the reception, and the wedding in between. And don’t forget about the grandparents! You never know what they’ll have up their sleeves… *This book is a 25,000-word novella that would be enjoyed best after reading My Kinda Forever, Summer Sisters book 6. Though part of a series, this book can be read as a standalone. It is intended for those 18 and over due to graphic language, descriptive sex, and the world’s most inappropriate grandparents.

     Rule number one for a professional matchmaker? Don’t fall in love with your client. I screwed that up when I fell for my best friend, Reid Fortino. He’s gorgeous, successful, and sexy as hell. I figured it would be easy to find him a match—and save the family business at the same time. But the more time I spend attempting to find the perfect girl, the more I realize how much I want him for my own. What’s the harm if we give in for just one night? I should have known that would never be enough. Now I’m on the verge of losing my job and my heart. We were an imperfect match from the start, but I don’t know how to let him go.

    His hard, chiseled muscles and playful invitations are irresistible.Bared before their windows, framed and displayed above the streets of Paris, they embark upon a provocative affair. Their daring game of exhibitionism lures her back for more and more, and she quickly realizes he is the man she has dreamed about.Yet she's never heard his voice. Never felt his touch. Never thought she'd experience something this exquisite.Or this bold...Paris SecretsDo you dare?

    As clever as it is hilarious, as profound as it is captivating.” –James Dashner, Author of The Maze Runner “A stinging science fiction satire that takes the downsides of modern living to their hilarious and horrifying conclusion.” – Foreword Reviews "A cultured, witty, and very British attack on vapid reality TV values, set in an empty-souled tomorrow." –Kirkus Reviews ABOUT ALWAYS GREENER: Life's biggest victim, please step up and claim your prize! A smash-hit reality show is offering a lifetime of luxury to the one person living the world’s worst life, and now everyone is out to prove just how bad they’ve got it. Want in? All you’ve got to do is accept ocular implants that let the whole world see life through your eyes, twenty-four hour a day, seven days a week. Fortunately, there’s still one person who hasn’t lost faith in all humanity. The show’s ever-smiling host is determined to wring some tiny bit of meaning out of this twisted competition and your unhappy existence. There has to be a purpose behind all this misery. …doesn’t there? Launching in February 2020, ALWAYS GREENER mixes the whimsical wordplay of Douglas Adams with the ominous relevance of the TV show “Black Mirror.” Set in a near-future corporate dystopia, this satirical sci-fi novel explores how individuals willingly sacrifice privacy and control of their own lives in exchange for new technologies and a few minutes of fame.