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Cautionary Tales
Stephen Tobolowsky - 2011
He has played everyone from Ned Ryerson in "Groundhog Day" to Sandy Ryerson in "Glee." He has amused thousands with his true stories on "The Tobolowsky Files" at Slashfilm.com. Here he shares some homespun philosophy and more true stories that prove tales of sex, drugs, and rock and roll are often the most humiliating and almost always the most enjoyable.
Pickup Lines
Holly Jacobs - 2005
Good books, the beach...life doesn't get any better. But when her aging car blows up she's desperate enough to take part in WLVH's newest contest - live in a truck for a chance to win it. It's not exactly how she planned to spend her vacation, but the scenery - AKA her opponent - is just as nice to look at as the beach would be, but he's tough to read. One minute she thinks he likes her, the next he's standoffish again.The last thing Ethan Westbrook wants to do is live in a truck, but his father convinces him that it's a great publicity stunt for their family-owned chain of pharmacies. He went into the truck counting down the seconds until he could get out of it, but after a few days with Mary, staying put didn't seem so bad. As a matter of fact, he couldn't think of anywhere he'd rather be.A guy, a girl, and a truck...things are heating up at WLVH, Love Handles, where love is more than just a song!
The Ducks In The Bathroom Are Not Mine: A decade of procrastination 2007 - 2017
David Thorne - 2017
Includes Overdue Account, Walter's Cargo Shorts, Simon's Piecharts, Missing Missy, Obviously a Foggot, Formal Complaints, Justin’s Floodlight, Matthew’s Party, Permission Slip and many more.
The Deepest State: A Satirical Epic
Oliver Willis - 2018
Donald Trump. Ivanka Trump. Hillary Clinton. Oprah. Barack Obama. Paul Ryan. Joe Biden. John Kerry. And a cast of thousands as the story behind the headlines you can't believe is exposed. Part political thriller, part soap opera, partially insane. The Deepest State was a viral hit - and this edition has the EXCLUSIVE, never before seen short story, "Enter the Bidenverse." Here's what they're saying about The Deepest State: "One of the greatest threads in Twitter history" – Richard Metzger "An amazing read" – A. Whitney Brown "Just keeps getting more amazing" – Jon Cryer "Amazing well written and riveting" – Merrill Markoe "This… is glorious" – Joy Reid "Epic, epic thread" – Jill Lawrence "A Twitter thread for the ages" – Marsha Warfield "Fucking brilliant" – Jeff Jarvis "Fantastic." – Steven Boyer "The most gorgeous thing I have read in a long time" – Penelope Patsuris "Good times" – Eliza Skinner "Comedy gold" – PJ Manney
Falling for the Dr: A Small Town Medical RomCom
Piper Sullivan - 2021
Stephen Fry Does "The Knowledge"
Stephen Fry - 2011
The Google generation thinks it doesn’t need to carry much of it around in its head any more. Much has already been written about the internet changing the way we think and learn. But is knowledge less valuable than it used to be?This absorbing programme explores the concept of ‘knowledge’, drawing on a variety of diverse sources: quiz games, psychology, education, news, trivia shows, satellite navigation and comedy. Featuring cab drivers, philosophers, memory champions and members of the Brains Trust, it looks at topics including cultural relativism, language learning and prodigious feats of memory. Plus, it attempts to answer such questions as: what constitutes useful knowledge in an era when we can find anything very quickly?; why has 'useless knowledge' gained in currency?; and, if Typhoo put the tea in Britain, should we take the piss out of epistemology?’Packed with interviews, debates and a feast of archive clips from the past three decades, this is an enlightening and entertaining overview of the world of knowledge, both general and specific.Presenting an archive-rich investigation into the changing value of knowledge from an original angle—the London black cabbie's famed �Knowledge” test—starring Britain's favorite examiner of language and culture, Stephen Fry.
Why Your Prescription Takes So Damn Long to Fill
Drugmonkey, Master of Pharmacy - 2010
I call your doctors office and am put on hold for 5 minutes, then informed that your prescription was phoned in to my competitor on the other side of town. Phoning the competitor, I am immediately put on hold for 5 minutes before speaking to a clerk, who puts me back on hold to wait for the pharmacist. Your prescription is then transferred to me, and now I have to get the 2 phone calls that have been put on hold while this was being done. Now I return to the counter to ask if we've ever filled prescriptions for you before. For some reason, you think that "for you" means "for your cousin" and you answer my question with a "yes", whereupon I go the computer and see you are not on file. The phone rings..." That's part of the reason why your prescription takes so long to fill, and after almost 20 years of this, a question I was never quite able to answer loomed larger and larger each day: "Why did I get into this profession?" Cranky customers whose only questions seem to involve their insurance co-pays. Pointless paperwork. People begging for early narcotic refills. Staff cuts. That was my workday. The struggle to get people the medicine and information they needed seemed almost futile at times. Then one day I got the answer. It hit me like a ton of bricks while driving home one spring evening along the California coast. I was born again, but it had nothing to do with Jesus. It did have a lot to do with a little plastic motorcycle. And I did become the pharmacist who saved Christmas. I absolutely know now why I became a pharmacist. I still don't know why your co-pay is so high.
A Second Helping
Robin O'Bryant - 2012
From realizing she should have paid more attention when the hula hoops were passed out in gym class, to near death by spray tanning, to realizing her daughters have given her more gifts than she could ever give them in return, A Second Helping is sure to make you laugh out loud and realize that being a parent is hilarious-- when it's happening to someone else.
Sex, Lies and The Dirty
Nik Richie - 2013
Phil, Anderson Cooper 360, Nancy Grace, and 20/20 suddenly provided him with notoriety as the Internet’s bad boy, whose site is employed by angry ex-mates (of both sexes) to post sordid and vengeful revelations online.TheDirty.com also presents opinionated comments from Nik himself about the shape of women’s bodies, as well as a language particular to his site. “Porta-Potties” describes women who prostitute themselves to perverse Saudi royalty. “The Greg” refers to his or anyone else’s penis, and “Scooby” refers to his sidekick friend.Sex, Lies and The Dirty is Nik’s confession of the backstage realities of his website, and his sordid lifestyle prior to hooking up with his lovely wife Shayne.Nik Richie is the host of a weekly web-radio show that commands a million listeners each week. And along with his wife Shayne, he will star in the upcoming VH1 reality series, Couples Therapy. The controversy has just begun.
Silver Dolphins: The Emblem of the Enlisted Submariner
Richard Hansher - 2015
The author doesn't pull any punches describing the good, the bad, the funny and the just plain ridiculous of the Submarine Service. Besides a wealth of information about what it's like to serve on a submarine, you'll meet real life characters like Tongue, Snake and Button Butt John. Did submarines make them rude, crude, and crazy. Or does the Submarine Service act as a magnet for every nut in the Navy? One thing is sure, after two months underwater, and with their back pay in their back pocket, Sub Sailors are as wild as cowboys after a cattle drive. Bar the doors and hide your daughters. Every reader owes it to themselves to use Amazons "Look In" feature to take a peek inside this unique and entertaining book.
It's Really 10 Months Special Delivery: A Collection of Stories from Girth to Birth
Natalie Guenther - 2015
We promise to make you laugh and give you that much needed break in the middle of all the crazy.We have partnered with the most talented bunch of moms and dads to bring you the best, the funniest, and the most outrageous stories to get you from girth to birth.Are you having strange cravings? Have you asked yourself what in the hell is happening to my body? Have strangers touched your belly? If you've answered yes to any of these questions then this is the book for you! Prop up your cankles, grab a bowl of your favorite ice cream covered in olives and have a laugh with our crew. Things are about to get real.
Broken Bananah: Life, Love, and Sex... Without a Penis
Ross Asdourian - 2018
Broken Bananah is my completely true and overly honest journey through severe genital trauma. What happens when you lose something you love? And... can you really break a penis? Absolutely, and mine was one of the worst on file. Tethered to a catheter and surrounded by that’s-what-she-said jokes, I learned one of life’s greatest lessons: it can always be worse. Experience life and love without a penis in a recovery story that could only happen in New York City. Let’s laugh til we cry, dive into the weird, and grapple with the power of sex in this modern coming-of-something tale.
Text Fails: 101 Epic Text Fails that Temporarily Ruined People's Lives (Autocorrect Fails)
Chris Chappelle - 2015
Note: These texting fails contain profanity, not for children.When are people going to learn that autocorrect can't be trusted? With FAILS like these, we actually hope that's not for a long time.This book complies 101 of the funniest, most viral and cringeworthy autocorrect screenshots to date.Guaranteed to put you on the floor laughing!
Riding Standing Up: A Memoir
Sparrow Spaulding - 2018
Two loving parents, a beautiful home, and grandparents that doted on her. Life was a dream until the day that changed everything. Sparrow's perfect life was ripped away at age three in one tragic moment that would forever change her. Follow her on her journey as she tells the story of her traumatic childhood and how she fought hard to stay strong despite her circumstances. In Riding Standing Up, Spaulding’s compelling storytelling will have you on the edge of your seat. Get ready to laugh out loud and cry more tears than you’d like as you follow her on her journey to empowerment, never knowing what’s around the corner. Brutally honest, truth-teller Sparrow Spaulding has been an unsung antiheroine…until now. She shows us we don’t have to be perfect to be worthy and that there’s power in being real.
War: A Four Horsemen Short Story
Dave Turner - 2019
1965.
War's found himself deep in the glamorous yet lethal world of international espionage. Unhappy with both the treachery and restrictive dress-code, when a name from the past reappears in his life War realises he must risk everything to keep the world safe once again. This short story follows on from the How To Be Dead series and continues the tale of everybody's favourite grumpy Horseman of the Apocalypse...
What Amazon readers are saying about the How To Be Dead Comedy Fantasy Series:
★★★★★ “Dave Turner is a funny man and ‘How To Be Dead’ is a brilliant read.”★★★★★ “If Neil Gaiman and Simon Pegg sat down to write a story together they might come up with something like this.”★★★★★ “Hilarious and unexpectedly moving.”★★★★★ "Laughs and excitement combined!"★★★★★ “Laugh out loud funny… It’s been a while since an author has made me laugh more than Pratchett does.”★★★★★ "If you like Tom Holt, Douglas Adams or Terry Pratchett, Dave Turner's books will fit perfectly into your collection."