Packed full of zingers and hilarious illustrations, if this doesn't put a smile on your face, nothing will. What's not to like:The other day someone left a piece of plasticine in my dressing room. I didn't know what to make of it. I'm against hunting. I'm actually a hunt saboteur. I go out the night before and shoot the fox. I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah. He was trying to pull a fast one. Black holes. I don't know what people see in them. So I fancied a game of darts with my mate. He said, 'Nearest the bull goes first.' He went 'Baah' and I went 'Moo'. He said 'You're closest.' Velcro. What a rip-off. Black Beauty. He's a dark horse. I've got a sponge front door. Hey, don't knock it.

    62 pages of chapter summaries, quotes, character analysis, themes, and more – everything you need to sharpen your knowledge of Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff. This detailed literature summary also contains Topics for Discussion and a Free Quiz on Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff by Christopher Moore.

    But home poker games shouldn't just be about winning: they're about stripping your opponents bare without their ever suspecting a thing. Teaming up with Mickey Lynn, Penn Jillette gives a home poker player everything he needs to know in one tidy volume. Lousy with attitude, stylish with swagger, How to Cheat Your Friends at Poker delivers a lifetime's worth of card-shark knowledge, including how to:--pick your marks--mark cards--use "shiners" to keep track of other player's hands--cut cards--stash holdoutsThis is not a book about how to play poker-the shelves are already full of those-it's about how to cheat, make money, and win big. If you're in the game, you're either a fish or a shark. How to Cheat Your Friends at Poker is the ultimate shark's playbook.

    When the system begins to misfire under the workload, the ill-equipped representatives of God and the Devil tasked with managing the process are given an ultimatum. Fix The Afternet or go back to your previous afterlives. They begin an odyssey through the hordes of souls awaiting judgement and the oblivious living in search of a solution. Rich in comic detail and populated with characters real and imagined from throughout time, their quest is never going to be straightforward…

    Phipps is “one of those rescues who are all the rage these days,” an upscale Manhattan dog with a rich owner, a great dog walker and an idyllic New York lifestyle. But his world is turned upside down when his owner, Angie DeSoto, suddenly passes from pancreatic cancer. The good news is that Angie leaves her millions to Mr. Phipps and he finds himself temporarily in the care of Devin McCloud, his dog walker and best bud. The bad news is that her adult children, a contentious clan at best, are furious about being left out in the cold, money-wise. And there's more. According to the terms of the will, Mr. Phipps and his millions will go to one of Angie's progeny, specifically the one best qualified to take care of him. After a brief trial period in which each one takes the dog, their efforts will be judged by a panel of dog experts – a famous, Cesar Millan-style dog trainer, a pet psychic and a renowned behaviorist. To further complicate matters, love will strike on several fronts as Mr. Phipps tells his story and his fate unfolds in this charming canine romantic comedy that reads like a date night version of "Marley and Me".

    Here, featuring gloriously pseudo-scientific diagrams and the inimitable writing style that made footballcliches.com a smash hit, they are covered in all their glory.

     After seven years of self-imposed exile after the love of her life cheated on her, Becca is finally going home. She’d like to think she’s being brave but in her honest moments she knows she’s being forced into it by the loss of her job. Can she trust herself not to hunt down her cheating ex and fling herself into his arms? Will she ever find the true love that she yearns for? Finding the perfect home with a hot but unavailable landlord and a life far better than she could have hoped for, Becca is still plagued by self-doubt. Is she annoying? Is she the most accident prone person in the world? Is she dislikeable? She thinks she might be all of these, but most importantly, is she normal? Because normal people don’t have The Beccabird squawking in their ears...

    You are clearly a fan of this legendary game that goes by the name of MINECRAFT! I encourage you to take a leap of faith and download this great and funny comedy book, which You wont regret! “MINECRAFT: Funny clean Minecraft jokes and memes for Children. (Minecraft, Minecraft Secrets, Minecraft Stories, Minecraft Books For Kids, Minecraft Books, Minecraft Comics, Minecraft Xbox)” is a great choice for anyone with a sense of humor, especially a fan of this great and iconic game! You will find great PICTURES with funny memes, hilarious jokes and wise quotes all in one place Let the laughs begin…

    (Edward Vernon is a pen name of a well known British doctor/author.) Set in the 1970s, in a small town in the English midlands, the book describes the medical misadventures of a young, harassed GP who is learning on the job. There's the embarrassed vicar with the guilty secret, the private patient who pays him to keep her ill, a beautiful young patient who insists on being examined in the bath, a six year old marble swallower and an a difficult encounter with a patient who can't speak a word of English. A huge hit in the UK and the USA when first published these books have only now been made available as ebooks on Amazon. Here's what the critics said about the Edward Vernon books: Warm and humorous...the anecdotes pour out of every page - Lancashire Evening Post Genuinely funny - South Wales Argus Wise, funny, sad and heartwarming - Chattanooga Times Most of his adventures are funny, some hilarious; but he has the good sense to leven the comedy lump with some that are sad, some touching. All are written lightly, easily, entertainingly - Oxford Times Good fun - Homes and Gardens The funniest of the funny doctor books - Richard Gordon Jolly good reading - Publishers Weekly Truthful, well observed and consistently readable - Daily Telegraph Will amuse, amaze and entertain - Yorkshire Post Views the human species he treats with much the same affection, compassion and humour as Herriot brings to the animal world - Cleveland Plain Daler Thoroughly delightful - Fresno Bee Hilarious - Titbits A delightfully funny book that keeps the reader laughing and appeals to one's sense of the ridiculous - Sunday Advocate, Baton Rouge For entertainment, a chapter or two before bedtime is just what the doctor ordered - Sacromento Bee Does for British GPs what Herriot has done for vets - Booklist Hilarious, written with skill and zest - Evening Telegraph Very funny - Citizen, Gloucester etc etc

     When Jack Waldie and his wife Nicola buy a house in rural Spain they intend to start a new life there, away from the hustle and bustle of Glasgow, but when things go awry between them Jack chooses to keep the spacious old place and moves there to write his crime novels in peace. In the small village in an area known as Spanish Lapland, due to its ever decreasing population, Jack befriends key local people who refuse to allow their birthplace to die. When he’s persuaded to look for a lodger in order to further their aims, the scene is set for a far more eventful summer than he anticipated.

    His wife Helen feels isolated in their large suburban home where her social life has all but disappeared as a result of their life long friends relocating to various retirement communities around the country. Mike is dead set against such a move, viewing it as a giant step closer to the grave. Mike and Helen struggle to come to a mutually agreeable solution spending countless hours visiting one retirement community after another. Their journey takes them from Connecticut to Florida and numerous stops in between. You guessed it. Mike finds objections everywhere and voices them non-stop to every sales agent. Then out of the blue all their plans take an unexpected turn.

    But by day Gerry is Gerrard, who is not only married, he’s a vicar. A vicar with doubts. Although Lucinda, his wife, has very few doubts when a trip to Birmingham goes startlingly right. And ageing gigolo Nelson never sees himself as a messiah until Albert convinces him he can walk on water – or is that just revenge for Nelson having put his head down the toilet at school? Does Gerrard really witness the Second Coming? Will Lucinda’s American prove himself in Hong Kong? And will the Late Contessa ever retrieve her Bentley?Find out in Giles Curtis’s twelfth rip-roaring, hilarious romp through the intricacies of fidelity, faith and epiphanies.

    After a long career spent rescuing prisoners from the KGB or helping defectors across the Berlin Wall the world has changed. The Wall has gone and no longer is there a need for a Russian speaking, ice-cold killer. The bad guys now all speak Arabic and state secrets are transmitted via satellite using blowfish algorithms impenetrable to anybody over the age of twelve. Counting down the days to his retirement by babysitting drunken visiting politicos he is seconded by MI6 for one last case. £250,000,000 of government money destined as a payoff for the dictator of a strategic African nation goes missing on its way to a remote Cornish airfield. Tremayne is dispatched to retrieve the money and nothing is going to stand in his way. Armed with an IQ of 165 and a bewildering array of weaponry and gadgets he is not about to be outmanoeuvred by the inhabitants of a small Cornish fishing village. Or is he? The Money That Never Was is a hilarious new novel by the author of the best selling "Return of The Hippy". Combining the innocent humour of the old Ealing Comedies with themes of alienation and belonging David Luddington manages to weave an engaging tale of one man's personal struggle with a world gone mad. It just happens that the man who is struggling is a trained MI6 agent, ruthless and efficient and the world with which is is struggling consists of fish & chips, cider and fudge. Not to mention the bungling Barry Penwrith desperate to hang on to his windfall.

    --Karin Gillespie"She's like a modern-day, southern-fried Erma Bombeck or Dave Barry."--BooklistAimed at anyone with a funny bone, these all new stories and essays by Gannett-syndicated columnist Susan Reinhardt tackle domestic life, particularly of the Southern persuasion, with sidesplitting observations and searing confessions. Reinhardt candidly lets readers into her world as she goes mano a mano with her Bubba of a husband--and occasionally her mother. From discovering she's getting a dreaded "front fanny" to revealing her husband's experiments with a Norelco shaver and their Pomeranian pooch, Reinhardt scrapes bare the bedrock truth about married life and love. She also poignantly shares her struggles with a depression that secretly plunged her downward and her reaction to the unexpected helping hands that pulled her up. Totally uncensored and blisteringly honest, Reinhardt is all heart--and a storyteller to savor and remember."So engaging. . .so honest. . .will make you laugh out loud."--The Asheville Citizen-Times"Like hanging out with your bluntest, most mischievous friend, the one who never fails to crack you up." --Chicago Sun-Times"Funny and touching. . .Reinhardt is not afraid to put it all out there."--The Pilot (N.C.)"Susan Reinhardt takes the naked, honest truth and sets it on fire in a blaze of laughter. . . will have you holding your sides the whole time." --Laurie Notaro, Autobiography of a Fat Girl"She can break your heart in one sentence and leave you laughing till you're breathless in the next." --Julie Cannon, True Love & Homegrown TomatoesSusan Reinhardt is a syndicated columnist and feature writer whose work has appeared all over the world in major newspapers such as the Washington Post, London Daily Mirror, Newsday, and other Tribune Media and Gannett publications. Reinhardt has won dozens of awards for her writing, including several Best of Gannett honors and a Pulitzer Prize nomination. A long-time volunteer fund-raiser for Hospice, the United Way, the American Lymphoma and Leukemia Society, the PTO and other worthwhile and not so worthwhile causes, Reinhardt is also a proud member of the Not Quite Write Book Club, a group of ten women who drink wine and pretend to act literary. A true Daughter of the South, Susan Reinhardt was born in South Carolina, was raised in Georgia, and currently makes her home in Asheville, North Carolina, the jewel city of the Blue Ridge Mountains. She has two adorable children and still calls her mama every night.

    Join Ricky Gervais, Steve Merchant and Karl Pilkington as they probe the nature of human society.In this episode: Athenian democracy and arboreal investments; Karl on road safety; President Pilkington's pronouncements; Malthusian musings; Karl's adoption agency; the ins and outs of organ donation; social injustice on the busses; morality and entomology; Karl's Luddite attitude to plate sanitation; euthanized ensifera; social orthodoxy at the orthodontist's; and splenetic etiquette.