A Very Punchable Face


Colin Jost - 2020
    From growing up in a family of firefighters on Staten Island to commuting three hours a day to high school and “seeing the sights” (like watching a Russian woman throw a stroller off the back of a ferry), to attending Harvard while Facebook was created, Jost shares how he has navigated the world like a slightly smarter Forrest Gump.You’ll also discover things about Jost that will surprise and confuse you, like how Jimmy Buffett saved his life, how Czech teenagers attacked him with potato salad, how an insect laid eggs inside his legs, and how he competed in a twenty-five-man match at WrestleMania (and almost won). You’ll go behind the scenes at SNL and Weekend Update (where he’s written some of the most memorable sketches and jokes of the past fifteen years). And you’ll experience the life of a touring stand-up comedian—from performing in rural college cafeterias at noon to opening for Dave Chappelle at Radio City Music Hall.For every accomplishment (hosting the Emmys), there is a setback (hosting the Emmys). And for every absurd moment (watching paramedics give CPR to a raccoon), there is an honest, emotional one (recounting his mother’s experience on the scene of the Twin Towers’ collapse on 9/11). Told with a healthy dose of self-deprecation, A Very Punchable Face reveals the brilliant mind behind some of the dumbest sketches on television, and lays bare the heart and humor of a hardworking guy—with a face you can’t help but want to punch.

The New Uxbridge English Dictionary


Jon Naismith - 2005
    This crafty revision of English vocabulary posits that Platypus should signify “to give your cat pigtails;” that Flemish should mean “rather like snot;” and that Celtic is in fact a prison for fleas. With nearly 600 new definitions, this side-splitting resource pushes the boundaries of the English language to riotous new limits.

Penguins with People Problems


Mary Laura Philpott - 2015
    They understand the agony of social awkwardness, the power of the perfect smoky eye, and the arm-(or wing)-flapping terror of having a bee in the car. In fact, these winged characters get into the same sticky situations we all do. They are Penguins with People Problems. So meet your favorite new flightless friends. They're brutally honest (except when they're lying), comically insecure, and totally relatable.

Word Freak: Heartbreak, Triumph, Genius, and Obsession in the World of Competitive Scrabble Players


Stefan Fatsis - 2001
    But for every group of "living-room players" there is someone who is "at one with the board." In Word Freak, Stefan Fatsis introduces readers to those few, exploring the underground world of colorful characters for which the Scrabble game is life — playing competitively in tournaments across the country. It is also the story of how the Scrabble game was invented by an unemployed architect during the Great Depression and how it has grown into the hugely successful, challenging, and beloved game it is today. Along the way, Fatsis chronicles his own obsession with the game and his development as a player from novice to expert. More than a book about hardcore Scrabble players, Word Freak is also an examination of notions of brilliance, memory, language, competition, and the mind that celebrates the uncanny creative powers in us all.

Taskmaster: 220 Extraordinary Tasks for Ordinary People


Alex Horne - 2018
    Your time starts now …In the TV show and on my marriage certificate, my job description is ‘Taskmaster’s Assistant’. That’s what I do and it’s an honour. I like Taskmaster a lot. And, of course, I love The Taskmaster. He’s mountainous. If you feel in any way the same as me then you should enjoy this book.There are tasks for you, your friends and your family. There are secret things and sneaky tricks. And there is one swear word. So it’s almost exactly like being on the show.Good luck. Make good choices. Let’s do Him proud.Alex HorneTaskmaster’s Assistant

The Red Hat Club


Haywood Smith - 2003
    Best friends since high school, a tightly knit club of five southern women rallies together when one of their husbands is discovered to be having an affair.

Homebody: A Guide to Creating Spaces You Never Want to Leave


Joanna Gaines - 2018
    This comprehensive guide will help you assess your priorities and your instincts, as well as your likes and dislikes, with practical steps for navigating and embracing your authentic design style.Room by room, Homebody gives you an in-depth look at how these styles are iterated as well as how to blend the genres you’re drawn to in order to create spaces that look and feel distinctly yours.In each chapter are practical takeaways to help problem solve potential pain points in your home. A fold out design guidebook at the back of the book offers a place for you to take notes and sketch out your own design plans as you make your way through the rooms.The insight shared in Homebody will instill in you the confidence to thoughtfully create spaces that you never want to leave.

101 Secrets for Your Twenties


Paul Angone - 2013
    Our twenties are filled with confusion, terrible jobs, anticipation, disappointment, cubicles, break-ups, transition, quarter-life crisis, loneliness, post-college what the heck, moderate success sandwiched in-between complete failure, and we need a worn, weathered guide stashed somewhere close by to help shed some light on this defining decade.This is that book.Expanded from the blog post, "21 Secrets for Your 20s" that spread like Internet wildfire with nearly a million readers in 190 countries, 101 Secrets for Your Twenties will encourage, inspire, prompt a plethora of LOLs, and kick-start your life forward with its witty, honest, and hilarious wisdom-stuffed-pearls to help you rock life in your twenties."Wow, may I just say how freakishly applicable these "secrets" are to my life in my 20s?"@ABsport19"I haven't laughed all day, until I read this. Hysterical & brilliant truth...So thankful for @PaulAngone"@kenin312"Probably some of the best pieces of advice for 20-somethings ever. I especially love 5Flol"@Emilyann54"I wish I had this list when I was in my 20s...I hope more people in their 20s, feeling all alone can read this."Reader, AllGroanUp.com

The Home Edit Life: The Complete Guide to Organizing Absolutely Everything at Work, at Home, and on the Go


Clea Shearer - 2020
    The Home Edit mentality is all about embracing your life--whether you're a busy mom, a roommate living with three, or someone who's always traveling for work. You just need to know how to set up a system that works for you.In the next phase of the home organizing craze, Clea Shearer and Joanna Teplin go beyond the pantry and bookshelf to show you how to contain the chaos in all aspects of your life from office space to traveling bags to pet supplies and holiday storage. Take quizzes and get to know your organizing style, tailor it to your family's lifestyle, and lead the low-guilt life as you apply more genius ideas to every aspect of your life.Clea and Joanna are here to remind you that "it's okay to own things" (we all do!) in the quest for pretty and smart spaces. With The Home Edit Life, you'll be corralling phone cords, archiving old photos, packing your suitcase like a pro, and arranging your phone apps by color in no time.

Suck Your Stomach in and Put Some Color On!: What Southern Mamas Tell Their Daughters That the Rest of Y'All Should Know Too


Shellie Rushing Tomlinson - 2008
    Readers will discover why blue eye shadow is trashy and learn to interpret regional dialect like the Southern Mama APB, a bulletin translated on Southern streets as: "Give your heart to Jesus, girl, because your butt is all mine!"Shellie carefully breaks down the teachings behind those famous manners and social graces through her firsthand observations and dry wit. Here's everything you need to know from how to cope with the unexpected, compete in the Mr. Right Game Show, raise children, and how to keep that marriage knot tied tight over time. Woven with quotes from real Southern Mamas and sprinkled with recipes and other Southern secrets, this book's a bona-fide celebration of all things south of the Mason-Dixon Line.

Zeus Grants Stupid Wishes: A No-Bullshit Guide to World Mythology


Cory O'Brien - 2013
    In reality, mythology is more screwed up than a schizophrenic shaman doing hits of unidentified. Wait, it all makes sense now. In Zeus Grants Stupid Wishes, Cory O’Brien, creator of Myths RETOLD!, sets the stories straight. These are rude, crude, totally sacred texts told the way they were meant to be told: loudly, and with lots of four-letter words. Skeptical? Here are just a few gems to consider: � Zeus once stuffed an unborn fetus inside his thigh to save its life after he exploded its mother by being too good in bed. � The entire Egyptian universe was saved because Sekhmet just got too hammered to keep murdering everyone. � The Hindu universe is run by a married couple who only stop murdering in order to throw sweet dance parties…on the corpses of their enemies. � The Norse goddess Freyja once consented to a four-dwarf gangbang in exchange for one shiny necklace. And there’s more dysfunctional goodness where that came from.

#IMomSoHard


Kristin Hensley - 2019
    Perhaps you’ve seen one of their insanely popular videos musing on everything from impractical swimsuit fashions to “Things I Found in My Bra.” Or maybe you’ve gone to one of the shows on their sold-out tour, hailed as “monster truck rallies for moms.” Or you might have just taken a break from mom-ing so hard yourself and decided to read some adult words for a few minutes. Did you pour yourself some wine?This is not a self-help book. Kristin and Jen know that you probably didn’t get to shower today and that the last thing you need is advice on all the stuff you’re doing wrong. Instead, Kristin and Jen talk nipple hair, sex after marriage, Mom-bods, and their unhealthy obsession with Khal Drogo from Game of Thrones. #IMomSoHard is packed with the back-and-forth laugh-out-loud best-friend banter that Kristin and Jen are known for, with plenty of real talk about post-partum depression, bullying, and the dark thoughts that plague every mom. Throughout it all, they know the ups and downs of motherhood often have nothing to do with your kids—it’s the female friendships and solidarity you have with other moms that makes it all worthwhile.#IMomSoHard is like a long, funny, gab session with your best mom friends. Kristin and Jen know 6:00–8:00 pm is the worst time to call you. They know not to give harass you when you show up to a playdate in a free t-shirt you got from the dentist. They won’t give pep talks, but they will talk you down from the motherhood ledge, because, congrats: you’re passing with a “C”—and that’s all any of us can hope for.

How to Insult, Abuse & Insinuate in Classical Latin


Michelle Lovric - 1998
    Learn to express your outrage in the words of such late, great Romans as Horace, Cicero, Virgil, and Ovid -- guys who could "dis" with class! Unapologetically quoting these famous Latin writers entirely out of context, the authors have compiled a witty, wicked little lexicon of insults and invective that will soon have you demeaning, defaming, and degrading your enemies with real "animus." 6 1/2" x 7 1/4". Black-and-white illustrations.

The Nerdist Way: How to Reach the Next Level (In Real Life)


Chris Hardwick - 2011
    As a lifelong member of "The Nerd Herd," as he calls it, Chris Hardwick has learned all there is to know about Nerds. Developing a system, blog, and podcasts, Hardwick shares hard-earned wisdom about turning seeming weakness into world-dominating strengths in the hilarious self-help book, "The Nerdist Way."From keeping their heart rate below hummingbird levels to managing the avalanche of sadness that is their in-boxes; from becoming evil geniuses to attracting wealth by turning down work, Hardwick reveals the secrets that can help readers achieve their goals by tapping into their true nerdtastic selves.Here Nerds will learn how to: Become their own time cop Tell panic attacks to go suck it Use incremental fitness to ward off predatorsA Nerd's brain is a laser-it's time they learn to point and fire!

The Dangerous Book for Dogs: A Parody


Rex & Sparky - 2007
    It also contains portraits of noble dogs throughout history, the mysteries of cats and humans, and everything else your dog ever wanted to know but was afraid to ask–like how to make toys out of human's household items, or how to escape from a humiliating reindeer costume.Generously illustrated with drawings by cartoonist Emily Flake, this hilarious parody is for good dogs, bad dogs, and the millions of people who love them.Rex and Sparky wrote this parody without authorization (because they are dogs and they do what they want.)