What Dave Barry did for American history in Dave Barry Slept Here and for getting older in Dave Barry Turns Forty, he does for everything else in America! Tupperware ladies, eighties people and leisure-concept salesmen beware: Dave Barry is on the loose and no one is safe!

    Donald Trump. Ivanka Trump. Hillary Clinton. Oprah. Barack Obama. Paul Ryan. Joe Biden. John Kerry. And a cast of thousands as the story behind the headlines you can't believe is exposed. Part political thriller, part soap opera, partially insane. The Deepest State was a viral hit - and this edition has the EXCLUSIVE, never before seen short story, "Enter the Bidenverse." Here's what they're saying about The Deepest State: "One of the greatest threads in Twitter history" – Richard Metzger "An amazing read" – A. Whitney Brown "Just keeps getting more amazing" – Jon Cryer "Amazing well written and riveting" – Merrill Markoe "This… is glorious" – Joy Reid "Epic, epic thread" – Jill Lawrence "A Twitter thread for the ages" – Marsha Warfield "Fucking brilliant" – Jeff Jarvis "Fantastic." – Steven Boyer "The most gorgeous thing I have read in a long time" – Penelope Patsuris "Good times" – Eliza Skinner "Comedy gold" – PJ Manney

    Julia, the girl you went out with last night, has been TAKEN HOSTAGE. What will you do? Will you go to the police and ask for help? Will you burst into the hideout, killing everyone in sight, then tell Julia that she shouldn’t misinterpret this as some sort of big commitment? Or will you unplug your phone and just get really, really drunk? The choice is yours!You awake to the sound of the phone ringing.“Hello?”You hear a man’s voice. It is muffled. “We’ve got Julia.”“Wait, what do you mean?”“We have kidnapped your girlfriend. If you ever want to see her again---”“Whoa, she’s not my girlfriend,” you say. “I just met her. I mean, I had a good time with her and all, but I wanna take it slow with this one, I think.”“We understand,” the voice says. “But she’s new to the city, and presently, you’re all she has. Give us fifty thousand dollars by tomorrow or we’ll blow her head off.”If you want to go and ask your parents if you can borrow fifty thousand dollars, go to page 173.If you want to have sex with your ex-girlfriend, consider getting back together with her, then think better of it, go to page 183.BE VERY CAREFUL! You’re directing the story and the CHOICES you make can result in MURDER, GRADUATE SCHOOL ENROLLMENT, TORTURE, MARRIAGE, POST-APOCALYPTIC SLAVERY, UNWANTED PREGNANCY, even TEMPING! It’s YOUR STORY and YOUR LIFE. All you’ve got to do is decide which page you want to turn to. JUST MAKE A CHOICE!

    Offered for free by Apple and Touchstone, a trademark of Simon & Schuster Inc., contains selections from the two books mentioned in the title.

    Taught to drive at the age of ten by his father, Luke can do more damage with a stick and a clutch than most men can do with a bottle of whiskey and a lousy mood. He counts down the days to his sixteenth birthday when he can finally get his license. Unfortunately, the first thing he does with it is "borrow" his neighbor's car. When Luke is pulled over and found in possession of an air pistol, a ski mask, a stolen TV, and a bag of pot, the unforgiving local magistrate takes scissors to his license and vows to lock him up if he ever stands in front of her again. As Luke's mother explores bad relationships and the lure of vodka, Luke moves in with his older brother, Nick, an easygoing ex-con who wants to steer Luke onto the straight and narrow. In the gnarled, muggy summer that follows, Luke contends with a lovely kleptomaniac girlfriend, a duffel bag full of cocaine, and the realization that he must save his family from themselves even as he plots to beat a path out of town. Dubbed the "Great American Redneck Novel" by Big Fish author Daniel Wallace, Drive Like Hell is a hilarious one-of-a-kind tale set in late '70s Georgia, complete with stock car racing, honky-tonk dancing, pro wrestling, drug dealing, and syndicated television. Dallas Hudgens brilliantly evokes Southern culture in this unforgettable debut that is raucous and wrenching, funny and wise.

    In this "terminally irreverent" ( "Richmond News-Leader" ) novel, he finds himself taking on everyone from his editor and his girlfriend to the fundamentalists and vegetarians covered on his beat - and along the way, learns some surprising (and hilarious) lessons about life, love, and the press. • Welter's "I Want to Buy a Vowel," also a Berkley Signature Edition, was named one of "Booklist's" Best Books of 1996. • Great reviews in the Berkley Signature Edition tradition. • The author has been compared to everyone from John Irving to Jonathan Swift, Frank Capra to Carl Hiaasen, John Kennedy Toole to Dave Barry.

    Well, that is what Rosie did.Buying the house was an accident. She only went out for bananas.Rosie embarks on renovating her 22 room ‘new’ home in Italy with a non-negotiable move-in date of Christmas Eve.Surrounded by a cast of interesting characters, the Irish woman learns the Italian way of life and house renovating in the country she wants to call home. But when the project manager goes AWOL, non-Italian speaking Rosie has no option but to take control with the help of a translation app.With no heating, windows disappearing, mystery holes in the garden, water flooding down the stairs, a pandemic destroyed business and with a move-in date that seems more laughable than doable, Rosie begins to question if she was crazy to follow through on her fabulous midlife crisis dream of renovating a villa in Italy.

    This collection includes 8 traditional British mystery novels: A COIN OF EDWARD VII THE SOLITARY FARM HAGAR OF THE PAWN-SHOP RED MONEY THE BISHOP'S SECRET THE GREEN MUMMY THE MYSTERY OF A HANSOM CAB THE MYSTERY QUEEN

    Illustrated with 16 pages of photographs.

    The first sufferer is Harold Greensmeyer, who contracts USAC while at the supermarket. He is soon confined to a mental hospital, where he encounters a cast of curious characters – the compulsive psychiatrist who tries to treat him, a woman convinced that she and Harold are fated to marry, and a befuddled cop who believes Harold is a mystic. When USAC spreads and the hospital is quarantined, they escape together in search of answers, love, and a cure.

    Flames of Chaos spread, swallowing up all they can with horrific hunger, bringing pain and madness to all they cross. Across the ocean, the lands have long since begun to die. The Empire of mankind struggles to maintain against the pressing weight of drought, famine, and the long-standing dangers of the Eastern Mountains, where ancient Dwarven [Constructs] and monsters roam. The people whisper of a coming doom, and some say even the Emperor's own Seers claim the end has begun... But none of these things have anything to do with a Tiny Snake. Not in the slightest. ------ From the online web-serial, comes a story of reincarnation, comedy, and the winding path towards existential redemption: All Hail The Tiny Snake God!

    She's also about six stone overweight. When she realises she can't cross her legs, has trouble bending over to tie her shoelaces without wheezing like an elderly chain-smoker, and discovers that even her hands and feet look fat, it's time to take action. But what action? She's tried every diet under the sun. This is the hysterical story of what happens when Mary joins 'Fat Club' where she meets a cast of funny characters and one particular man who catches her eye. The story is laugh-out-loud funny and will resonate with anyone who has dieted, tried to keep up with any sort of exercise programme or spent 10 minutes in a changing room trying to extricate herself from a way too-small garment that she ambitiously tried on and is now completely stuck in. Bernice Bloom is the big, new name in comedy writing...this is the first full-length novel after her series of laugh-out-loud mini books.