Book picks similar to
The Retired Kid by Jon Agee


picture-books
picture-book
children
humor

Tea Party Rules


Ame Dyckman - 2013
    And she has several strong opinions on how Tea Party must be played. Cub tries to follow her rules . . . but just how much can one bear take, even for cookies? A laugh-out-loud funny look at the required give-and-take of playtime, Tea Party Rules is an eventual friendship story that will delight grubby cubs, fancy girls, and cookie lovers everywhere.

Children Make Terrible Pets


Peter Brown - 2010
    Meet Lucy's Pet. She calls him Squeaker. Lucy and Squeaker have the best day ever. Until things start to go wrong...Do children make terrible pets? What do you think?

Leo: A Ghost Story


Mac Barnett - 2015
    He likes to draw, he makes delicious snacks, and most people can't even see him. Because Leo is also a ghost. When a new family moves into his home and Leo's efforts to welcome them are misunderstood, Leo decides it is time to leave and see the world. That is how he meets Jane, a kid with a tremendous imagination and an open position for a worthy knight. That is how Leo and Jane become friends. And that is when their adventures begin. This charming tale of friendship—from two of the best young minds in picture books: the author of the Caldecott Honor–winning Extra Yarn and the illustrator of the Bologna Ragazzi Award–winning Josephine—is destined to become a modern classic that will delight readers for years to come.

Chopsticks


Amy Krouse Rosenthal - 2012
    But one day, this inseparable pair comes to a fork in the road. And for the very first time, they have to figure out how to function apart. From New York Times best-selling author Amy Krouse Rosenthal and rising artistic talent Scott Magoon, this witty and inventive tale celebrates both independence and the unbreakable bonds of friendship.

The Book with No Pictures


B.J. Novak - 2014
    Words that might make you say silly sounds... In ridiculous voices...Hey, what kind of book is this, anyway?At once disarmingly simple and ingeniously imaginative, The Book With No Pictures inspires laughter every time it is opened, creating a warm and joyous experience to share--and introducing young children to the powerful idea that the written word can be an unending source of mischief and delight.

Be Quiet!


Ryan T. Higgins - 2017
    One that's visually stimulating! With scenic pictures! And style! He has plenty of ideas about what makes a great book, but his friends just WON'T. STOP. TALKING.Children and adults alike will chuckle at this comedic take on bookmaking from acclaimed author-illustrator Ryan T. Higgins.

This Moose Belongs to Me


Oliver Jeffers - 2012
    He hadn't always owned a moose. The moose came to him a while ago and he knew, just KNEW, that it was meant to be his. He thought he would call him Marcel. Most of the time Marcel is very obedient, abiding by the many rules of How to Be a Good Pet. But imagine Wilfred's surprise when one dark day, while deep in the woods, someone else claims the moose as their own...

Diary of a Spider


Doreen Cronin - 1996
    of a spider. But don't be worried – he's more scared of you and your gigantic shoe! Actually, he's a lot like you. He goes to gym class and has Grandparents' Day at school. But he also spins sticky webs, scales walls, and takes wind–catching lessons. Lucky for him, his best friend is a fly!Doreen Cronin and Harry Bliss, the team behind the #1 bestselling Diary Of A Worm, spin a hilarious tale about the upside–down web world of an eight–legged charmer and his unlikely friend, Fly.

Those Darn Squirrels and the Cat Next Door


Adam Rubin - 2011
    But now that it's spring and his beloved birds are back, nothing can spoil his good mood--until a cat named Muffins arrives next door. Muffins terrifies the birds and interrupts Fookwire's painting. He even gives the squirrels wet willies! How can this bully be stopped? Someone had better come up with a plan.It's brains versus brawn in this hilarious picture book, and the results surprise everyone. Except, perhaps, those darn squirrels.

Unicorn Thinks He's Pretty Great


Bob Shea - 2013
    Things were just fine around here until UNICORN showed up.So what if he can fly?Or make it rain cupcakes?And turn stuff into gold?Big deal. I can do some cool stuff too, like...Hey! What are you doing? Why are you opening the book?He's just going to tell you how great he is. Blah, blah, blah.Go ahead. Just don't say I didn't warn you.Dopey Unicorn.

Library Lion


Michelle Knudsen - 2006
    No running allowed. And you must be quiet. But when a lion comes to the library one day, no one is sure what to do. There aren't any rules about lions in the library. And, as it turns out, this lion seems very well suited to library visiting. His big feet are quiet on the library floor. He makes a comfy backrest for the children at story hour. And he never roars in the library, at least not anymore. But when something terrible happens, the lion quickly comes to the rescue in the only way he knows how. Michelle Knudsen's disarming story, illustrated by the matchless Kevin Hawkes in an expressive timeless style, will win over even the most ardent of rule keepers.

A Bad Case of Stripes


David Shannon - 1998
    One of the worst I've ever seen!"Camilla Cream loves lima beans, but she never eats them. Why? Because the other kids in her school don't like them. And Camilla Cream is very, very worried about what other people think of her. In fact, she's so worried that she's about to break out in...a bad case of stripes!

A Unicorn Named Sparkle


Amy Young - 2016
    She imagines the flowers that she'll braid into his beautiful pink mane, and she even picks the perfect name for him: Sparkle. But when Sparkle arrives, his ears are too long, his horn is too short, he smells funny--and oh, he has fleas. Lucy isn't pleased, but in the end she warms up to Sparkle and realizes that even though he wasn't exactly the unicorn she wanted, he might be just the one she needs.

Crankenstein


Samantha Berger - 2013
    BEWARE OF CRANKENSTEIN! Who is Crankenstein?HE IS A MONSTER OF GRUMPINESS THAT NO ONE CAN DESTROY!MEHHRRRR!!! HE'S ALIVE!He may look like any ordinary boy, but when faced with a rainy day, a melting popsicle, or an early bedtime, one little boy transforms into a mumbling, grumbling Crankenstein! When Crankenstein meets his match in a fellow Crankenstein, the results could be catastrophic-or they could be just what he needs to brighten his day!

17 Things I'm Not Allowed to Do Anymore


Jenny Offill - 2004
    For example, in the morning, gluing her brother's bunny slippers to the floor sounds like a good plan. But now she's not allowed to use glue anymore. And what about when she shows Joey Whipple her underpants--they're only underpants, right? Turns out she's not allowed to do that again, either. And isn't broccoli the perfect gift for any brother? It's just too bad her parents don't think so. But she has the last laugh in this humerous picture book about not-so-great behavior. And don't miss the companion book to "17 Things I'm Not Allowed to Do Anymore: ""11 Experiments that Failed," a zany exploration of the scientific method by everyone's favorite troublemaking protagonist.