“You’re about as useful as a windshield wiper on a goat’s butt.” Keep this book handy, someday you’ll be glad you have it. “Let's play horse. I'll be the front end and you just be yourself.” Pick any of the many jaw-dropping insults then laugh at the look on your adversary’s face when you whip one out and use it on them. You’ll leave no doubt in their mind that you are a master of sarcastic insults! ADDED BONUS: In addition to the fresh and hilarious insults in this book, you’ll also find great sarcastic observations about life hidden inside this book’s pages, like… “I think the reason so many people have smart phones is because opposites attract!” You’re no idiot, so you need this book to start your new life as the master of sarcastic insults and put-downs! “Hey! Who left the Idiot Box open? Now they're everywhere!”

    Learn how to make a 5-cent wedding band, leather iPod case, and paracord bullwhip!

    Now you can extend it for personal, corporate and enterprise use with advanced plugins and this professional development guide. Learn how to create plugins using the WordPress plugin API: utilize hooks, store custom settings, craft translation files, secure your plugins, set custom user roles, integrate widgets, work with JavaScript and AJAX, create custom post types. You'll find a practical, solutions-based approach, lots of helpful examples, and plenty of code you can incorporate!Shows you how to develop advanced plugins for the most popular CMS platform today, WordPress Covers plugin fundamentals, how to create and customize hooks, internationalizing your site with translation files, securing plugins, how to create customer users, and ways to lock down specific areas for use in corporate settings Delves into advanced topics, including creating widgets and metaboxes, debugging, using JavaScript and AJAX, Cron integration, custom post types, short codes, multi site functions, and working with the HTTP API Includes pointers on how to debug, profile and optimize your code, and how to market your custom plugin Learn advanced plugin techniques and extend WordPress into the corporate environment.

    But developing these systems brings its own set of headaches. With lots of examples and practical advice, this book takes a holistic view of the topics that system architects and administrators must consider when building, managing, and evolving microservice architectures.Microservice technologies are moving quickly. Author Sam Newman provides you with a firm grounding in the concepts while diving into current solutions for modeling, integrating, testing, deploying, and monitoring your own autonomous services. You'll follow a fictional company throughout the book to learn how building a microservice architecture affects a single domain.Discover how microservices allow you to align your system design with your organization's goalsLearn options for integrating a service with the rest of your systemTake an incremental approach when splitting monolithic codebasesDeploy individual microservices through continuous integrationExamine the complexities of testing and monitoring distributed servicesManage security with user-to-service and service-to-service modelsUnderstand the challenges of scaling microservice architectures

    This hands-on guide provides invaluable insight for creating successful test-driven development processes. With source code and examples featured in both C# and .NET, the book walks you through the TDD methodology and shows how it is applied to a real-world application. You'll witness the application built from scratch and details each step that is involved in the development, as well as any problems that were encountered and the solutions that were applied.Clarifies the motivation behind test-driven development (TDD), what it is, and how it works Reviews the various steps involved in developing an application and the testing that is involved prior to implementing the functionality Discusses unit testing and refactoring Professional Test-Driven Development with C# shows you how to create great TDD processes right away.

    Fueled by significant benefits and an impressive portfolio of real-world applications already in production, Rails is destined to continue making significant inroads in coming years.Each new Rails application showing up on the web adds yet more to the collective wisdom of the Rails development community. Yesterday's best practices yield to today's latest and greatest techniques, as the state of the art is continually refined in kitchens all across the Internet. Indeed, these are times of great progress.At the same time, it's easy to get left behind in the wake of progress. Advanced Rails Recipes keeps you on the cutting edge of Rails development and, more importantly, continues to turn this fast-paced framework to your advantage.Advanced Rails Recipes is filled with pragmatic recipes you'll use on every Rails project. And by taking the code in these recipes and slipping it into your application you'll not only deliver your application quicker, you'll do so with the confidence that it's done right.The book includes contributions from Aaron Batalion, Adam Keys, Adam Wiggins, Andre Lewis, Andrew Kappen, Benjamin Curtis, Ben Smith, Chris Bernard, Chris Haupt, Chris Wanstrath, Cody Fauser, Dan Benjamin, Dan Manges, Daniel Fischer, David Bock, David Chelimsky, David Heinemeier Hansson, Erik Hatcher, Ezra Zygmuntowicz, Geoffrey Grosenbach, Giles Bowkett, Greg Hansen, Gregg Pollack, Hemant Kumar, Hugh Bien, Jamie Orchard-Hays, Jamis Buck, Jared Haworth, Jarkko Laine, Jason LaPier, Jay Fields, John Dewey, Jonathan Dahl, Josep Blanquer, Josh Stephenson, Josh Susser, Kevin Clark, Luke Francl, Mark Bates, Marty Haught, Matthew Bass, Michael Slater, Mike Clark, Mike Hagedorn, Mike Mangino, Mike Naberezny, Mike Subelsky, Nathaniel Talbott, PJ Hyett, Patrick Reagan, Peter Marklund, Pierre-Alexandre Meyer, Rick Olson, Ryan Bates, Scott Barron, Tony Primerano, Val Aleksenko, and Warren Konkel.

    Over the past few years, incremental developments in core engineering practices for software development have created the foundations for rethinking how architecture changes over time, along with ways to protect important architectural characteristics as it evolves. This practical guide ties those parts together with a new way to think about architecture and time.

    Others who have no intention of ever studying the subject have this notion that calculus is impossibly difficult unless you happen to be a direct descendant of Einstein. Well, the good news is that you can master calculus. It's not nearly as tough as its mystique would lead you to think. Much of calculus is really just very advanced algebra, geometry, and trig. It builds upon and is a logical extension of those subjects. If you can do algebra, geometry, and trig, you can do calculus.Calculus For Dummies is intended for three groups of readers:Students taking their first calculus course - If you're enrolled in a calculus course and you find your textbook less than crystal clear, this is the book for you. It covers the most important topics in the first year of calculus: differentiation, integration, and infinite series.Students who need to brush up on their calculus to prepare for other studies - If you've had elementary calculus, but it's been a couple of years and you want to review the concepts to prepare for, say, some graduate program, Calculus For Dummies will give you a thorough, no-nonsense refresher course.Adults of all ages who'd like a good introduction to the subject - Non-student readers will find the book's exposition clear and accessible. Calculus For Dummies takes calculus out of the ivory tower and brings it down to earth. This is a user-friendly math book. Whenever possible, the author explains the calculus concepts by showing you connections between the calculus ideas and easier ideas from algebra and geometry. Then, you'll see how the calculus concepts work in concrete examples. All explanations are in plain English, not math-speak. Calculus For Dummies covers the following topics and more:Real-world examples of calculus The two big ideas of calculus: differentiation and integration Why calculus works Pre-algebra and algebra review Common functions and their graphs Limits and continuity Integration and approximating area Sequences and series Don't buy the misconception. Sure calculus is difficult - but it's manageable, doable. You made it through algebra, geometry, and trigonometry. Well, calculus just picks up where they leave off - it's simply the next step in a logical progression.

     Rails(TM) AntiPatterns identifies these widespread Rails code and design problems, explains why they're bad and why they happen--and shows exactly what to do instead.The book is organized into concise, modular chapters--each outlines a single common AntiPattern and offers detailed, cookbook-style code solutions that were previously difficult or impossible to find. Leading Rails developers Chad Pytel and Tammer Saleh also offer specific guidance for refactoring existing bad code or design to reflect sound object-oriented principles and established Rails best practices. With their help, developers, architects, and testers can dramatically improve new and existing applications, avoid future problems, and establish superior Rails coding standards throughout their organizations.This book will help you understand, avoid, and solve problems withModel layer code, from general object-oriented programming violations to complex SQL and excessive redundancy Domain modeling, including schema and database issues such as normalization and serialization View layer tools and conventions Controller-layer code, including RESTful code Service-related APIs, including timeouts, exceptions, backgrounding, and response codes Third-party code, including plug-ins and gems Testing, from test suites to test-driven development processes Scaling and deployment Database issues, including migrations and validations System design for "graceful degradation" in the real world

    Its humorous title begins with the punch line of a classic joke about someone who is baffled by technology. It was written by a 40-year computer veteran who wants to take the mystery out of computers and allow everyone to gain a true understanding of exactly what computers are, and also what they are not. Years of writing, diagramming, piloting and editing have culminated in one easy to read volume that contains all of the basic principles of computers written so that everyone can understand them. There used to be only two types of book that delved into the insides of computers. The simple ones point out the major parts and describe their functions in broad general terms. Computer Science textbooks eventually tell the whole story, but along the way, they include every detail that an engineer could conceivably ever need to know. Like Momma Bear's porridge, But How Do It Know? is just right, but it is much more than just a happy medium. For the first time, this book thoroughly demonstrates each of the basic principles that have been used in every computer ever built, while at the same time showing the integral role that codes play in everything that computers are able to do. It cuts through all of the electronics and mathematics, and gets right to practical matters. Here is a simple part, see what it does. Connect a few of these together and you get a new part that does another simple thing. After just a few iterations of connecting up simple parts - voilà! - it's a computer. And it is much simpler than anyone ever imagined. But How Do It Know? really explains how computers work. They are far simpler than anyone has ever permitted you to believe. It contains everything you need to know, and nothing you don't need to know. No technical background of any kind is required. The basic principles of computers have not changed one iota since they were invented in the mid 20th century. "Since the day I learned how computers work, it always felt like I knew a giant secret, but couldn't tell anyone," says the author. Now he's taken the time to explain it in such a manner that anyone can have that same moment of enlightenment and thereafter see computers in an entirely new light.

    Panda was designed to remove low quality content from the search engine results pages. The surprise to many were some of the big name casualties that were taken out by the update. On 24th April 2012, Google went in for the kill when they released the Penguin update. Few SEOs that had been in the business for any length of time could believe the carnage that this update caused. If Google's Panda was a 1 on the Richter scale of updates, Penguin was surely a 10. It completely changed the way we need to think about SEO. On September 28th 2012, Google released a new algorithm update targeting exact match domains (EMDs). I have updated this book to let you know the consequences of owning EMDs and added my own advice on choosing domain names. While I have never been a huge fan of exact match domains anyway, many other SEO books and courses teach you to use them. I'll tell you why I think those other courses and books are wrong.The EMD update was sandwiched in between another Panda update (on the 27th September) and another Penguin update (5th October).Whereas Panda seems to penalize low quality content, Penguin is more concerned about overly aggressive SEO tactics. Stuff that SEOs had been doing for years, not only didn't work any more, but now can actually cause your site to be penalized and drop out of the rankings. That’s right, just about everything you have been taught about Search Engine Optimization in the last 10 years can be thrown out the Window. Google have moved the goal posts. I have been working in SEO for around 10 years and have always tried to stay within the guidelines laid down by Google. This has not always been easy because to compete with other sites, it often meant using techniques that Google frowned upon. Now, if you use those techniques, Google is likely to catch up with you and demote your rankings. In this book, I want to share with you the new SEO. The SEO for 2013 and Beyond.

    Every religion has angels, Sylvia tells us. Different from spirit guides, angels are spiritual messengers who are available to help us if we will simply ask for their assistance. Sylvia goes on to discuss the properties of angels; the true nature of God, good, evil, and the Other Side; and explains how we can overcome guilt, accept ourselves, and thereby understand our own particular “contract.” In the second half of the program, Sylvia leads a meditation that invokes the presence of our angels and individual spirit guides, and invites them to communicate with us. We feel their protection, receive their healing, and with Sylvia’s encouragement, learn how to ask them for the help we desire.

    If programming intrigues you (for whatever reason), Beginning Programming All-In-One Desk Reference For Dummies is like having a starter programming library all in one handy, if hefty, book.In this practical guide, you'll find out about algorithms, best practices, compiling, debugging your programs, and much more. The concepts are illustrated in several different programming languages, so you'll get a feel for the variety of languages and the needs they fill.Inside you'll discover seven minibooks:Getting Started: From learning methods for writing programs to becoming familiar with types of programming languages, you'll lay the foundation for your programming adventure with this minibook. Programming Basics: Here you'll dive into how programs work, variables, data types, branching, looping, subprograms, objects, and more. Data Structures: From structures, arrays, sets, linked lists, and collections, to stacks, queues, graphs, and trees, you'll dig deeply into the data. Algorithms: This minibook shows you how to sort and search algorithms, how to use string searching, and gets into data compression and encryption. Web Programming: Learn everything you need to know about coding for the web: HyperText. Markup Language (better known simply as HTML), CSS, JavaScript, PHP, and Ruby. Programming Language Syntax: Introduces you to the syntax of various languages - C, C++, Java, C#, Perl, Python, Pascal, Delphi, Visual Basic, REALbasic - so you know when to use which one. Applications: This is the fun part where you put your newly developed programming skills to work in practical ways. Additionally, Beginning Programming All-In-One Desk Reference For Dummies shows you how to decide what you want your program to do, turn your instructions into "machine language" that the computer understands, use programming best practices, explore the "how" and "why" of data structuring, and more. And you'll get a look into various applications like database management, bioinformatics, computer security, and artificial intelligence. After you get this book and start coding, you'll soon realize that -- wow! You're a programmer!

    This question is central to all the great religions, Kreeft demonstrates, for striving toward holiness, moving toward perfect love, is the whole purpose of life.Kreeft admits that he is only a beginner on the climb to holiness, and it is to novices like him that he has written this engaging and encouraging book. Using the insights and experiences of saints and great spiritual writers throughout history, Kreeft shows what holiness is and how it can be achieved. He especially draws upon the spiritual classic Abandonment to Divine Providence by Jean-Pierre de Caussade, S.J. The core of Caussade's timeless gem is that God reveals himself to all of us through the daily events of our lives. The surest way toward spiritual growth, therefore, is by perceiving and accepting the merciful will of God in every situation.Kreeft stresses the simplicity of his approach to holiness, which focuses mainly on the virtue of love. Sanctity is love, he asserts, and only that can give us what we all long for—deep and lasting joy.

    The authors also include examples covering a variety of different integration technologies, such as JMS, MSMQ, TIBCO ActiveEnterprise, Microsoft BizTalk, SOAP, and XSL. A case study describing a bond trading system illustrates the patterns in practice, and the book offers a look at emerging standards, as well as insights into what the future of enterprise integration might hold. This book provides a consistent vocabulary and visual notation framework to describe large-scale integration solutions across many technologies. It also explores in detail the advantages and limitations of asynchronous messaging architectures. The authors present practical advice on designing code that connects an application to a messaging system, and provide extensive information to help you determine when to send a message, how to route it to the proper destination, and how to monitor the health of a messaging system. If you want to know how to manage, monitor, and maintain a messaging system once it is in use, get this book.