(Except secretly you really do you masochistic, beastly person you.) Illustrated, painfully funny and drop-your-jaw ridiculous, this is trivia from the cesspit of time that you won't be able to stop reading once you start.*To aid childbirth.**They exploded it with 100 times too much dynamite and rained blubber down on unsuspecting people and buildings.***Decency prevents us from answering this one here. You'll have to buy the book to find out.

    Estes Kefauver High School in Dacron, Ohio!  They’re all back in glorious black and white with color Magic Marker–Chuck U. Farley, Maria Teresa Spermatozoa, Purdy “Psycho” Lee Spackle, Faun Laurel Rosenberg, and, of course, Dacron’s most famous son, Larry Kroger.  Learn everything there is to know about Kroger’s past before he became the pop-culture legend Pinto (Tom Hulce), the virgin fraternity pledge in National Lampoon’s Animal House. With a hilarious “Where are they now?” addendum and a brilliantly funny new introduction by P. J. O’Rourke, the 39th Reunion Edition is sure to be the talk of the baby boomers who grew up with National Lampoon and of the new generation of comedy fans spawned by the success of The Onion.

    In the same interactive format as the best-selling Lennon Legend, this innovative book features rare photographs and 20 removable facsimiles, including Marley's handwritten lyrics and concert memorabilia, even a private sketchbook. The package also includes a 50-minute spoken word CD featuring archival Marley interviews. Rock journalist James Henke relates the dramatic story of Marley's life, from his impoverished childhood in Jamaica's Trenchtown to his spiritual awakening through Rastafarianism, his multinational musical success, and his death from cancer at age 36. In addition to interviews with Marley's family and associates conducted especially for this book, Henke includes thoughts on favorite Marley songs from such diverse artists as U2's Bono, Sean Paul, Ben Harper, and Chrissie Hynde. Marley's message was one of love, peace, and equalityand in words and pictures, Marley Legend shows why Bob Marley is, as Entertainment Weekly recently called him, "still the world's biggest rock star."

    G. Browne seamlessly gift wraps this horrific and hilarious sequel to his “extremely strong” (Publishers Weekly, starred review) zombie novel Breathers. He sees you when you’re sleeping . . . he knows when you’re undead. How does the leader of a failed zombie civil rights movement from California rescue a group of his undead brethren and help a lonely Breather girl as he hides from a band of medical researchers while disguised as Santa Claus? If you’ve never believed in Christmas miracles, then you wouldn’t understand. Andy Warner has just escaped from a zombie research facility in Portland, Oregon, where he’s been subjected to experimental testing for the past year. With Christmas just days away, Andy figures that donning a jolly old St. Nick costume to throw off his would-be captors is just the ticket. But he never expects to encounter a sweet, lonesome nine-year-old girl who not only reminds Andy of the family he’s lost but who thinks he’s the real Santa. He also doesn’t count on being recognized as last year’s national quasi-celebrity by a clandestine group of decaying supporters who look to him for leadership. For the living and the undead, this unforgettable holiday tale will truly put on display just who is gnawing and who is nice. . . .

    Written to help her Gentile husband and others like him who fall for believing a Jewish mother-in-law when she says, "Don't bother driving me, I'll take a cab," Jewish as a Second Language shows how to be one of the family—how to worry, how to interrupt, how to change your hotel room. It's not Yiddish. Though non-Jews can endear themselves by learning how to mis-use words like schmendrick and schmatta—providing both laughs and confirmation of Jewish superiority—this Jewish language is about the complex twists and somersaults of everyday speech, of unexpected nuances, hidden meanings, and swampy thickets of behavior, of wins, losses, and draws in competitions you never knew you entered. It's about the most common OAQs (obsessive anal questions): "This mole looks okay, doesn't it?" "Can Saltines go bad?" "They'll de-ice the wings before takeoff, right?" The Four Basic Shrugs. Acronyms never to use again: NASCAR, STD, and MRSA (Methicillin Resistant Staphylococcus Aureus, the potentially deadly skin virus that’s spread by contact, and also by talking about it casually). The things non-Jews do for fun and what Jews do: Contra dance/Contradict, Read the comics/Read the obituaries, Get your boobs done/Get your taxes done. Stuff never found in a Jewish home (trout flies, a lineoleum knife, a Lay-Z-Boy, a rottweiler) or mouth (Miracle Whip, marshmallow fluff, Bud).So you'll sit, you'll read, you'll laugh until you're nauseous. It's a nice book.

    The elves are way too obsessed with playing Dungeons and Dragons, Frosty has a Hitler mustache made of coal, the reindeer have a tendency of exploding for no apparent reason, and Santa is a piratey mutant with a body made of sausages.

    Constable Wood was a disaster waiting to happen. He was the sort of cop who was happier helping little old ladies across the street (even when they were quite content where they were) than pursuing the perpetrators of dreadful deeds. But if he failed to strike fear into the hearts of the criminal underworld, his superiors had a real problem on their hands. Never before had they been forced to deal with such a well-meaning but accident-prone officer and they hoped, fervently, never to see his like again. From his early encounters with a less-than-impressed public, through the terrifying days of the Springbok Tour riots, to the gradual realisation that perhaps he wasn’t cut out for life on the beat, this is the hilarious story of a young cop who created a severe disturbance in the force.

    The year is 1364, and the brothers Grossbart have embarked on a naïve quest for fortune. Descended from a long line of graverobbers, they are determined to follow their family's footsteps to the fabled crypts of Gyptland. To get there, they will have to brave dangerous and unknown lands and keep company with all manner of desperate travelers-merchants, priests, and scoundrels alike. For theirs is a world both familiar and distant; a world of living saints and livelier demons, of monsters and madmen. The Brothers Grossbart are about to discover that all legends have their truths, and worse fates than death await those who would take the red road of villainy.

    Award-winning comedian Milton Jones unleashes a rapid-fire string of brilliant one-liners about life, the universe, God, Jesus, the Church and being a Christian in turn hilarious, surreal, shocking and profound, but all designed to make us think about faith from a completely different perspective. The book is illustrated with Milton s own cartoons. It will appeal to fans of Dave Walker and Adrian Plass, although Milton Jones voice is refreshingly unique. Not for the easily offended! Meanwhile, the sequel 'EVEN MORE CONCISE TEN SECOND SERMONS' has also arrived and is available in all good bookstores.

    Gill is an unashamedly intolerant perfectionist whose witty observations and scathing criticism have made him one of the most respected critics to walk through a restaurant's doors. 'Table Talk' is an idiosyncratic selection of A.A. Gill's writing about food, taken from his Sunday Times and Tatler columns.

    The book behind the successful comedy show.Guy Pratt came of age just as playing bass became cool, with the likes of Paul Simonon and Bruce Foxton. Having dallied with Funkapolitan, Pratt suddenly found himself on Top of the Pops and supporting David Bowie with smooth Australian outfit Icehouse. At a ludicrously young age Guy Pratt became a sought after bass player to the stars, finding himself crawling from studio to bar, from hotel to stadium portacabin with Robert Palmer, Womack & Womack, Bernard Edwards, Bryan Ferry and David Crosby, etc. The eighties were in their prime, and with a number of Crolla-suited appearances in windswept videos behind him, he was invited to join Pink Floyd for a series of stadium of extravaganzas to make Bono & co look fairly modest. Pratt has recorded with Madonna, and spent time in the studio with Michael Jackson. He was in The Smiths for a week, has travelled through customs in a wheelchair after a flight with Jimmy Page, and has lived to tell all. MY BASS AND OTHER ANIMALS emerges from the successful stand-up tour of the same name. It charts his journey from a Mod band in Southend to playing with Roxy Music at Live 8.

    The manuscript is comprised of the lyrics to Denis Leary's popular Christmas song of the same title (plus three new verses written for this book), and includes 25 newly commissioned illustrations in the style of classic stop-motion TV Christmas specials.

    After a highly publicized and controversial exit from Mormonism, Lamborn intertwines the story of his awakening with psychological aspects of religious belief.

    Witty and unexpected, this collection of customer reviews is sure to show you a new, hilarious, and completely candid side of Amazon products and reviews you never knew existed.

    A sexy fling wasn’t on her Christmas list this year, but Santa has a trick up his sleeve for the hard-working business owner – and his name is Tobin Looney. A missed flight and a few shots of Fireball later, a silent night is the last thing on their minds. Sinclair and Tobin find themselves in a spicy, sweet, and sticky situation. Will the serious Sinclair throw caution to the wind for the very sexy and wild Tobin Looney? Find out in Not So Silent Night.