Damaged Angels: An Adoptive Mother Discovers the Tragic Toll of Alcohol in Pregnancy


Bonnie Buxton - 2004
    Her book also offers guidance to parents who have children with FASD. By the time Bonnie's daughter Colette hit first grade, her parents were coping with her frequent stealing and lying, and the necessity of special education. At fourteen, she discovered drugs and sex; by eighteen, she was a crack addict living on the streets. After many frustrating years consulting numerous therapists, a TV news story gave Bonnie the answer she was looking for — and sent her on a quest for a diagnosis and help for Colette. Damaged Angels can aid and comfort all those affected by FASD — the most common cause of intellectual impairments in most industrialized nations — and reduce the number of babies born with this disorder in the future. The most important book on fetal alcohol disorder since Michael Dorris's The Broken Cord, Damaged Angels is a book for every parent, practitioner, and teacher working with a child with FASD.

I Am Intelligent: From Heartbreak to Healing--A Mother and Daughter's Journey Through Autism


Peyton Goddard - 2012
    Robbed of speech and bodily control, and despite her loving parents' best efforts to help her, Peyton Goddard suffered neglect and ongoing abuse by many who dismissed her as autistic and severely mentally retarded. Peyton's violent outbursts and bizarre, self-destructive behavior left her parents terrified at the prospect of having to institutionalize their daughter. No one could have imagined that she possessed a brilliant mind in her uncooperative body until her first opportunity to communicate electronically at age 22 when she typed "I AM INTLGENT," a breakthrough reminiscent of "The Miracle Worker." After two decades, mother and daughter are finally able to communicate, and Peyton goes on to graduate valedictorian from college. Her story challenges assumptions that any child, regardless of competence, can be less of a human being. Today Peyton is following through on her vow to be an advocate on behalf of other devalued people. Her inspirational life helps readers transcend stereotypes and join her in the radical notion that, as she says, "All people are vastly valuable. Treasure all because great is each."

Adoption Nation How The Adoption Revolution Is Transforming America


Adam Pertman - 2000
    Adoption is both sweeping the nation and changing it, accelerating our transformation into a more multicultural and multiethnic country and helping to redefine our understanding of "family." Adoption Nation is essential reading for adoptive families, for anyone contemplating adopting a child, and for everyone touched by this extraordinary cultural transformation.

Secret Thoughts of an Adoptive Mother


Jana Wolff - 1997
    Often irreverent, always insightful, surprisingly funny and stunningly honest, Secret Thoughts tells it like it is: How it feels for a woman to look nothing like her child and to know the woman who does. This fiercely honest and funny book answers questions no one dares to ask: What if I don't like the child I get? Will she want the baby back? If this is the happiest day of my life, why am I so sad? Am I too white for a kid this black? Chapter titles include: The Myth of Bliss, Friendly Racism, Meeting Your Child's Mother, and Adopted Poop Doesn't Smell Any Different.

The Lunch-Box Chronicles: Notes from the Parenting Underground


Marion Winik - 1998
    . . ."   With the candor and often hilarious outlook that have made her a beloved commentator on NPR, Marion Winik takes the reader on an unforgettable journey through modern parenthood, with all of its attendant anxieties and joys.        A single mother with two small boys, Winik knows exactly what she's talking about, from battles over breakfast and bedtime to the virtues of pre-packaged food and weightier issues like sex education and sibling rivalry. Part memoir and part survival guide, The Lunch-Box Chronicles is an engaging philosophy of parenting from a staunch realist, who knows that kids and their parents both will inevitably fall far short of perfection, and that a "good enough mom" really is, in fact, good enough.

Black Baby White Hands: A View from the Crib


Jaiya John - 2002
    It is only three months following the assassination of Martin Luther King, Jr., and the nation is burning. Black and White America are locked in the tense grip of massive change. Into this inferno steps an unsuspecting young White couple. Neither had truly known even a single African American person while growing up. Now, a child will change all of that forever. In this fateful moment, a Black baby becomes perhaps the first in the history of New Mexico to be adopted by a White family. Here is a brazenly honest glimpse into the mind and heart of that child, a true story for the ages that flows like a soulful river-separated from his mother at birth, placed into foster care, adopted, and finally reunited with his biological family in adulthood-an astounding journey of personal discovery. Jaiya John has opened the floodgates on his own childhood with this piercing memoir. Black Baby White Hands, a waterfall of jazz splashing over the rocks of love, pain and the honoring of family. Magically, this book finds a way to sing as it cries, and to exude compassion even as it dispels well-entrenched myths. Destined to become a classic, this stirring account is sure to find itself well worn, stained by tears, and brushed by laughter in the lap of parents, adolescents, educators, students, and professionals. Here comes the rain and the sunshine, all at once.

Belief Is Its Own Kind of Truth, Maybe


Lori Jakiela - 2015
    She told Lori, “We all have two lives and we carry the maps of those lives with us. Our left hands mark the lives we’re born with. Our right hands mark the lives we make for ourselves.”Belief Is Its Own Kind of Truth, Maybe is a book about mapping those lives – the lives we are born with and the lives we are allowed – and lucky enough – to make for ourselves.Belief is part adoption narrative and part meditation on family, motherhood, nature vs. nurture, and what it means to make our own authentic human connections. It extends the possibilities of creative nonfiction at a time when many people are talking about what exactly truth-in-memoir means. The book’s patchwork form mirrors the fragmented experience of being an adoptee confronting — and trying to heal — her roots.Belief is the story of one woman’s search for her birth mother coupled with the parallel story of her own motherhood and her own re-making. It’s about what it means to be a mother, what it’s like to have two very different blood connections, and what it means to form a family.Belief is about searching for roots and what that means, exactly. It’s about finding a balance between the families we’re born into and the ones we make ourselves.

Ithaka: A Daughter's Memoir of Being Found


Sarah Saffian - 1998
    I think I'm your birth mother."The phone call, wholly unexpected, instantly turned Sarah Saffian's world upside-down, threatening her sense of family, identity, self. Adopted as an infant twenty-three years before, living happily in New York, Sarah had been "found" by her biological parents despite her reluctance to embrace them.In this searing, lyrical memoir, Sarah chronicles her painful journey from confusion and anger to acceptance and, finally, reunion--but not until three soul-searching years had passed. In spare, luminous prose, Sarah Saffian crafts a powerful story of self-discovery and belonging--a deeply personal memoir told with grace, eloquence, and compassion. At once heartbreaking and profoundly uplifting, Ithaka is sure to touch anyone who has grappled with who they are.

Instant Mom


Nia Vardalos - 2013
    So she made a choice that shocked friends, family, and even herself: with only fourteen hours' notice, she adopted a preschooler.Instant Mom is Vardalos's poignant and hilarious true chronicle of trying to become a mother while fielding nosy "frenemies" and Hollywood reporters asking, "Any baby news?" With genuine and frank honesty, she describes how she and husband Ian Gomez eventually found their daughter . . . and what happened next. Vardalos explores innovative ways to conquer the challenges all new moms face, from sleep to personal grooming, and learns that whether via biology, relationship, or adoption—motherhood comes in many forms.The book includes laugh-out-loud behind the scenes Hollywood anecdotes, plus an Appendix on how to adopt worldwide. Vardalos will donate proceeds from the book sales to charities.Vardalos candidly shares her instant motherhood story that is relatable for all new moms (and dads!)

Until We All Come Home: A Harrowing Journey, a Mother's Courage, a Race to Freedom


Kim De Blecourt - 2012
    Nothing, however, could have prepared de Blecourt for the twisted nightmare she would endure. During her year-long struggle to extricate her newly adopted little boy from that post-Soviet country's corrupt social service and judicial systems, de Blecourt was insulted, physically assaulted, and arrested. Worse, her months of loneliness, worry, and fear drove her to the brink of spiritual despair. But God had no intention of abandoning de Blecourt or her family. Her amazing story-culminating in a spine-chilling race to freedom-offers dramatic proof that God's light shines on even in the deepest darkness.

The A-Z of Therapeutic Parenting: Strategies and Solutions


Sarah Naish - 2018
    This book provides everything you need to know in order to be able to effectively therapeutically parent.Providing a model of intervention, The A-Z of Therapeutic Parenting gives parents or caregivers an easy to follow process to use when responding to issues with their children. The following A-Z covers 60 common problems parents face, from acting aggressively to difficulties with sleep, with advice on what might trigger these issues, and how to respond.Easy to navigate and written in a straightforward style, this book is a 'must have' for all therapeutic parents.

Rescuing Julia Twice: A Mother's Tale of Russian Adoption and Overcoming Reactive Attachment Disorder


Tina Traster - 2014
    Why wouldn’t she look her parents in the eye or accept their embraces? Why didn’t she cry when she got hurt? Why didn’t she make friends at school? Traster de­scribes how uncertainty turned to despair as she blamed herself and her mothering skills for her daughter’s troublesome behavioral is­sues, until she came to understand that Julia suffered from reactive attachment disorder, a serious condition associated with infants and young children who have been neglect­ed, abused, or orphaned in infancy. <!--?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /-->Hoping to help lift the veil of secrecy and shame that too often surrounds parents struggling with attachment issues, Traster describes how with work, commitment, and acceptance, she and her husband have been able to close the gulf between them and their daughter to form a loving bond, and concludes by providing practical advice, strategies, and resources for parents and caregivers.

Believing It All: Lessons I Learned from My Children


Marc Parent - 2001
    The acclaimed book in which a natural-born storyteller relays the vital lessons and inspiration he has drawn from life's most perfect teachers: children.

Inconceivable: A Medical Mistake, the Baby We Couldn't Keep, and Our Choice to Deliver the Ultimate Gift


Carolyn Savage - 2011
    An unthinkable situation . . . you’re pregnant with the wrong baby. You can terminate, but you can’t keep him. What choice would you make?Carolyn and Sean Savage had been trying to expand their family for years. When they underwent an IVF transfer in February 2009, they knew it would be their last chance. If they became pregnant, they would celebrate the baby as an answer to their prayers. If not, they would be grateful for the family they had and leave their fertility struggles behind forever.They never imagined a third option. The pregnancy test was positive, but the clinic had transferred the wrong embryos. Carolyn was pregnant with someone else’s baby.The Savages faced a series of heartbreaking decisions: terminate the pregnancy, sue for custody, or hand over the infant to his genetic parents upon delivery. Knowing that Carolyn was carrying another couple’s hope for a baby, the Savages wanted to do what they prayed the other family would do for them if the situation was reversed. Sean and Carolyn Savage decided to give the ultimate gift, the gift of life, to a family they didn’t know, no strings attached.Inconceivable provides an inside look at how modern medicine, which creates miracles daily, could allow such a tragic mistake, and the many legal ramifications that ensued with both the genetic family and the clinic. Chronicling their tumultuous pregnancy and its aftermath, which tested the Savage’s faith, their relationship to their church, and their marriage, Inconceivable is ultimately a testament to love. Carolyn and Sean loved this baby, making it impossible for them to imagine how they could give him life and then give him away.In the end, Inconceivable is a story of what it is to be a parent, someone who nurtures a life, protects a soul, only to release that child into the world long before you’re ready to let him go.

Love Works Like This: Moving from One Kind of Life to Another


Lauren Slater - 2002
    Slater, career-oriented and willfully autonomous, charts her own personal journey and decision-making process, starting with a list of the pros and cons, about having a child. The cons are many, the pros only one: “learning a new kind of love.” But what will that love look like? How does one reconcile the needs of the self with the demands of others? How do couples go from the dyad that is a marriage to the triad that is a family? And how can Slater adjust to losing precious control of her own carefully developed life?Slater’s complex biological and psychological history also lies at the core of this unique and yet strikingly universal story. One of the first people ever to take Prozac, she chronicles the impossibly conflicting advice regarding pregnancy and antidepressants, and explains the rationale behind her eventual decision to stop taking the medication during her first trimester. This is Slater’s first encounter with self-sacrifice, and for her a crossroad at which modern medicine and basic human love meet. Love Works Like This is a richly written book by “an enormously poetic and ebullient writer” (Elle magazine), an author who writes with “beauty and bravery” (Los Angeles Times Book Review) about falling in love, about growing into the ability to put someone else’s life ahead of your own, and about the rich rewards we can draw from the courage to exchange one kind of happy life for another.