And it carries through to the vote that made Barack Obama the forty-fourth president of the United States.

    This heart-wrenching and heartwarming book chronicles Rodney's triumphant journey to full remission after following a little known but highly effective cancer treatment.What if you were told you had 90 days to live?For Rodney and Paige Stamps, Rodney's "out-of-the-blue" cancer diagnosis quickly turned a normally hypothetical question horribly real.When Paige met Rodney, a nationally touring heavy-metal drummer, they both fell hard. Rodney swapped his drumsticks for marriage, family, a job, and then, his own business.The '90-Days' diagnosis hit just as their business was starting to soar."You're going to die" was the solemn verdict from numerous MDs, who promised only to briefly extend Rodney's life. With both a growing family and business, and so much living still to do, Rodney's response to the no-hope prognosis? "I don't think so."90 Days to Live recounts the Stamps' incredible and inspirational journey to find an alternative "answer to cancer." In the end...They'd beaten the cancer and built a million dollar business.While his weight dropped from 190 to 138 lbs., Rodney and Paige explored countless cancer "cures" of widely varying value. They even exposed a scam treatment being peddled by a mob boss--crossing paths with the FDA and FBI!Alternately heart-wrenching and heart-warming--and delivered in an engaging dual-author format--90 Days to Live will speak to anyone struggling with an "incurable" disease, building a business under trying circumstances, or anyone who just loves a good old-fashioned, "beating-the-odds" story.

    Homeland Insecurity is Volume 17 in the always bestselling and always entertaining Onion series.The Onion is the world’s most popular humor publication, with more than 3.8 million weekly visitors to its website (theonion.com) and a print circulation of more than 500,000. More than a million copies of its various books have been sold to date, beginning with Our Dumb Century, which was a #1 New York Times bestseller and winner of the Thurber Prize for American Humor.

    A collection of 45 ridiculous 911 emergency calls, submitted by 911 Call Center Operators across the U.S.Dedicated to you, the Taxpayer who funded these calls.Note: A quick 10-minute read of humorous quotes from real calls.Just enough for a grin of the day!

    Book by Jenkins, Dan

    If you or someone you know is discontented, distressed, or downright disturbed, maybe the Great White North is right for you, eh. But how much do you really know about Canada? Can you do a job that Canada needs (do you play hockey, drill for oil, or make poutine?)? Can you identify the best Canadian province for your lifestyle (lots of tundra or just some tundra?)? Can you master the proper pronunciation of "sorry"? What strange wizardry is the Canadian government? Is maple syrup acceptable substitution for currency? At long last, How to Move to Canada can help make your vague threat into a cold Canadian reality. This book is also full of activities such as: Color the flag of your new homeland Match the strange Canuck dialect with their local definitions And more! PLEASE NOTE: This is a humor book. It won't really help you emigrate. Rather, it's a subversive mix of real information on the Great White North plus a hilarious look at all the reasons why you won't like it there any better — and why they probably won't have you anyway.

    Some stories are funny, some poetic, some vulgar, and some are a little disturbing. Each story has been lovingly crafted to amuse and entertain you in six words.Six Word Wonder is a social media sensation, with over 10,000 followers on Instagram @sixwordwonderNow, for the first time, Doug brings his best tiny stories together in one collection. Unlocking the cage, she stepped out.Cupid. Tomorrow, aim for his head.Home alone, but toilet just flushed.Baby loves whining. Mother loves wine.…reader. I’m a very gifted mind…I poured two glasses… then remembered.Take a moment out of your hectic schedule to enjoy a Six Word Wonder.

    It was a time of hatred, racism, violence, obese children, war, untaxed rich people, and incandescent light bulbs -- perhaps the worst days we had ever seen. And at the heart of it all was a thuggish, thoughtless man, George W. Bush, who lashed out angrily at whatever he didn't understand -- and he understood so very little. Then there was that laugh of his -- that horrible snicker that mocked everything intelligent and nuanced. Also, he looked like a chimp. It seemed like the end for the United States of America. We would crumble in the hands of vicious, superstitious dimwits determined to hunt "ter'ists" or other figments of Bush's rotten mind. There was nothing left to do but head to Whole Foods to prepare our organic, sustainable, fair-trade last meal as the country ended around us. Despair had overtaken us, and we wondered aloud whether we could ever feel hope again. And then a man emerged who firmly answered, "Yes we can!" Oh, but Barack Obama was no mere man. He was a paragon of intelligence and civilized society. A savior to the world's depressed. A lightbringer. A genius thinking thoughts the common man could never hope to comprehend. And his words -- his beautiful words read from crystal panes -- reached down to our souls and told us all would be well. With the simple act of casting a ballot for Barack Obama, we could make the world an immeasurably better place -- a world of peace, of love, of understanding, of unicorns, of rainbows, of expanded entitlements. This was his promise. And now, having had him as president for more than two years, we can say without reservation that he has delivered all his promises and more and is the best president this country -- or any country -- has ever had or could even imagine to have.

    Bumper to Bumper is newer, longer, and better, touting mostly original stories that include the time Doug crashed his brand-new Porsche company car into a tree, the real story behind the time Doug crushed a Chrysler PT Cruiser, the time Doug bribed a government official in South Africa, the time Doug got detained at the Canadian border on an automotive press trip, and the story of Doug’s relationship with automakers. Also, Doug wrote this description himself in the third person.

    His book, You’re Not Helping… is a collection of short comedy articles that guide you through his delightful, inventive, and often nonsensical take on everything from attention-seeking dolphins to home invasions by the The Barenaked Ladies. You’re Not Helping… blends both humor and heart in what literary critics around the world are describing as “technically a book.” Join the 10s of readers worldwide enchanted by Ryan’s unique brand of wit.Ryan Patricks lives in San Francisco via Philadelphia. He is an aspiring comedy writer and once saw John Cusack at a Jamba Juice. You can follow him on Twitter @Ryan_Patricks or you can choose not to, it’s totally up to you.

    In his first book, Murry describes his decades of experience as a leader in the world of fashion along with personal advice on how he made it to the top of the profession he was destined to have—and how we can do the same in our careers.Murry gives us glimpses of well-known fashion personalities, institutions, and events, and in an easy-going, humble narrative, takes us from his childhood in Houston to the most influential runways of the world, including his travels around the globe and a stint on an oil rig as a young man. Equally important are Murry’s takeaways on what qualities he believes it takes to become a good leader and how we can use them to achieve success in any workplace. This is not a how-to, but rather a thoughtful and straightforward look at the talents and grace that allowed Murry to thrive in his chosen career. Everyone, no matter their career or stage in life—or their knowledge of or interest in the fashion world—will find this book a fun, informative, and inspirational gift from an author who wants everyone to enjoy the same success in their career that he has.

    In it you'll find essays on such topics as: - Menopause Spurs Thoughts of Death and Turkey- I Dreamed a Dream That My Lashes Were Long- Twitter Woes: I've Got Plenty of Characters, Just No Character- Movie To-Do List: Cook Like Julia, Adopt Really Big Kid - Charlie Bit Your Finger? Good! - And other thoughts on the virus that is YouTube- And much more!And much more! For any woman who longs for the good old days when Jane Fonda in legwarmers was the only one who saw you exercise, YOU DON'T SWEAT MUCH FOR A FAT GIRL is comfort food in book form.

    has received more than 50 million views on YouTube alone for his witty Internet videos ("Hastily Made Tourism Video," "Cleveland Browns: Factory of Sadness," and others). Now he delivers the same wicked sense of humor in a book.This hilarious rustbelt satire lampoons Cleveland's quirks, including our boundless obsession with crappy sports teams, the nonstop quest to reinvent our civic image, and a grab-bag collection of odd local celebrities.Polk tackles such timely topics as: Great Places to Take a Dump Downtown . . . Riding the RTA: A Fascinating Cultural Experience . . . A Cleveland Enemies Hall of Fame . . . A Comparison of Three Area Gentlemen's Clubs . . . A Fabulous Remake of Cleveland's Own Flag . . . and much more.Full color photos throughout.

    Here is Erma Bombeck, laughing her way through childhood, marriage, motherhood, and celebrity status, even keeping her sense of humor as she battled terminal illness.

    Essence is the fundamental, universal, loving energy that connects the entire universe and all its living things. This universal loving goodness binds us all together in an intimate and powerful way. Char shows readers how to tap into the power of Essence and draw strength and wisdom from these deep, fundamental connections. Using the universal presence of the Essence, readers will learn: - The truth about living and dying - The 5 sources of power and how to manifest them - About spirits and angels and how to benefit from their aide - How to help departed loved ones find peace - Ways to ward off negative and harmful energies - And much more… With Char as a guide, readers will explore the vast and connected world of Essence and delve into their own inherent spiritual awareness.