Now, in this uproarious collection, she sneaks her sharp wit through airport security and delivers her most absurd and hilarious stories ever.On safari in Africa, it's anyone's guess as to what's more dangerous: the wildlife or Chelsea. But whether she's fumbling the seduction of a guide by not knowing where tigers live (Asia, duh) or wearing a bathrobe into the bush because her clothes stopped fitting seven margaritas ago, she's always game for the next misadventure.The situation gets down and dirty as she defiles a kayak in the Bahamas, and outright sweaty as she escapes from a German hospital on crutches. When things get truly scary, like finding herself stuck next to a passenger with bad breath, she knows she can rely on her family to make matters even worse. Thank goodness she has the devoted Chunk by her side-except for the time she loses him in Telluride.Complete with answers to the most frequently asked traveler's questions, hot travel trips, and travel etiquette, none of which should be believed, UGANDA BE KIDDING ME has Chelsea taking on the world, one laugh-out-loud incident at a time.

    But why do people root so passionately for tragically inept teams like the Boston Red Sox, the Chicago Cubs, and the Philadelphia Phillies? Why do people organize their emotional lives around lackluster franchises such as the Cleveland Cavaliers, the San Diego Padres, and the Phoenix Suns, none of whom have ever won a single championship in their entire history? Is it pure tribalism? An attempt to maintain contact with one's vanished childhood?In True Believers, humorist and lifelong Philly fan Joe Queenan answers these and many other questions, shedding light on--and reveling in--the culture and psychology of his countless fellow fans.

    Now it’s a worldwide community…. Even its darkest moments are lightened by Karen and Georgia's effortlessly funny banter and genuine empathy.” — RollingStone.comAt the Publisher's request, this title is being sold without Digital Rights Management Software (DRM) applied.

    In the fall of 2012, she went through a harrowing cycle of panic attacks and dread that wouldn't abate for months. So she began @sosadtoday, an anonymous Twitter feed that allowed her to express her darkest feelings, and which quickly gained a dedicated following. In So Sad Today, Broder delves deeper into the existential themes she explores on Twitter, grappling with sex, death, love, low self-esteem, addiction, and the drama of waiting for the universe to text you back. With insights as sharp as her humor, Broder explores—in prose that is both gutsy and beautiful, aggressively colloquial and achingly poetic—questions most of us are afraid to even acknowledge, let alone answer, in order to discover what it really means to be a person in this modern world.

    They remove the books that patrons no longer check out. And they put back the books they treasure. Annie Spence, who has a decade of experience as a Midwestern librarian, does this not only at her Michigan library but also at home, for her neighbors, at cocktail parties—everywhere. In Dear Fahrenheit 451, she addresses those books directly. We read her love letters to The Goldfinch and Matilda, as well as her snarky break-ups with Fifty Shades of Grey and Dear John. Her notes to The Virgin Suicides and The Time Traveler’s Wife feel like classics, sure to strike a powerful chord with readers. Through the lens of the books in her life, Annie comments on everything from women’s psychology to gay culture to health to poverty to childhood aspirations. Hilarious, compassionate, and wise, Dear Fahrenheit 451 is the consummate book-lover's birthday present, stocking stuffer, holiday gift, and all-purpose humor book.

    Thinking this is his rock bottom, little does James know that by the end of the year he will have befouled himself in a Los Angeles steakhouse and disrespected a pensioner on television. Luckily, there is one thing he can rely on for comfort – music. In true Acaster fashion, this ends up with a completely unnecessary mission: to buy as much music as he can released in 2016, the year before everything went wrong (for James, at least). Some albums are life-changing masterpieces, others are ‘Howdilly Doodilly’ by Okilly Dokilly, a metalcore album devoted to The Simpsons character Ned Flanders. But all of them play a part in the year that James gets his life back on track.In PERFECT SOUND WHATEVER, James takes us through the music of 2016, the bullshit of 2017, and how the beauty of one defeated the ugliness of the other. He will also reveal how he stole a cookie from Clint Eastwood and attempted to complete his musical odyssey by reforming one of Kettering’s most overlooked bands.

    Actor and author Evan Handleras new book, Itas Only Temporary, is both a deeply personal memoir and a series of meditations on life, love, faith, gratitude, and mortality. In closely examining his own triumphs, mistakes, and less-than-ideal relationships since his miraculous recovery from a supposedly incurable leukemia more than twenty years ago, Handler zeroes in on the most profound question facing every human being: How can a person live well with the knowledge that time is limited? In doing so, Handler has created a poignant and wildly funny rumination on the ironies of human existence. Structured as a collection of incisive and probing autobiographical stories, Itas Only Temporary is a startlingly candid portrait of one manas struggle to find love and happiness within a life he knows heas lucky just to have. By turns hilarious and heart-wrenching, blunt and shocking, Handleras defiantly unconventional memoir ultimately succeeds as both a stirring love story and a classic coming-of-age tale. Itas Only Temporary celebrates the transformation from boy to manaeven if it took Handler more than forty years to get there.

    Le Guin, and with an introduction by Karen Joy Fowler, a collection of thoughts—always adroit, often acerbic—on aging, belief, the state of literature, and the state of the nation.Ursula K. Le Guin has taken readers to imaginary worlds for decades. Now she’s in the last great frontier of life, old age, and exploring new literary territory: the blog, a forum where her voice—sharp, witty, as compassionate as it is critical—shines. No Time to Spare collects the best of Ursula’s blog, presenting perfectly crystallized dispatches on what matters to her now, her concerns with this world, and her wonder at it.   On the absurdity of denying your age, she says, If I’m ninety and believe I’m forty-five, I’m headed for a very bad time trying to get out of the bathtub. On cultural perceptions of fantasy: The direction of escape is toward freedom. So what is ‘escapism’ an accusation of? On her new cat: He still won’t sit on a lap…I don’t know if he ever will. He just doesn’t accept the lap hypothesis. On breakfast: Eating an egg from the shell takes not only practice, but resolution, even courage, possibly willingness to commit crime. And on all that is unknown, all that we discover as we muddle through life: How rich we are in knowledge, and in all that lies around us yet to learn. Billionaires, all of us.

    In 2007 they left their jobs, as newt catchers, and their native English shores for beautiful green Galicia, in the remote northwest of Spain – a place of mystery and mists, Celtic legends and bagpipes, and a language of its very own. There, they set to work to self-renovate a derelict farmhouse, whilst trying to become self-sufficient and learn more about this untamed part of the Iberian peninsula.When S suggested a three week holiday, walking one of the old pilgrim routes to Santiago de Compostela, little did they know it would change their lives totally. From the outset with too much weight and too little training they realised their Camino goal was not going to be met. With failure looming, they chose to abandon their pilgrimage to view abandoned houses instead. “We first saw A Casa do Campo on a rainswept November morning. Mists were rising and water dripped onto the rusted kitchen range from gaping holes in the roof. There were bird’s nests in the bedrooms and bats in the hallway. Bare, dead looking trees surrounded the property which the Spanish estate agent enthusiastically promised us would be laden with fruit come August. It was love at first sight.”If only buying it were so easy!Deaths, taxes and even Spanish bureaucracy fail to dent their enthusiasm and eventually Lisa and S head off for their new Good Life abroad with an overloaded Ford Escort, tool bags, vegetable seeds and a trusty stereo stacking system. Oh, and two deckchairs in which to relax in the evenings.Plum, Courgette & Green Bean Tart tells the story of that first 12 months living la vida dulce, The Good Life, in this beautiful green part of mainland Spain, Galicia, or Galiza in its own language.This fly on the wall account uses genuine letters home and diary entries to tell a true story: a story of battles with Spanish bureaucracy and mañana timekeeping; of struggles to self-renovate a derelict home before the bats and the weather reclaim it; of learning to protect chickens against aerial assassins and precious food for the table from underground vegetable thieves; of gardening in bizarre weather conditions; of discovering how to cook delicious and sometimes interesting meals on a finally mouse-free wood burning stove; and of falling in love. Plum, Courgette & Green Bean Tart, Book One of the ‘writing home’ series, has an immediacy which has you falling under its spell. Twelve chapters tell a story of twelve months, of four seasons, of a whole year to write home about. Also included are genuine Galician recipes plus a plum, courgette & green bean tart to make, and a free photo album to follow as the story unfolds. The interwoven information and anecdotes about Galicia are told by someone who has truly fallen in love with this little known and timeless green region with its gentle people and erratic weather, ensuring this will truly be a book to write home about.

    Her escapades range from visiting a nude beach with her seventy-five-year-old mother in tow to going on a raid with a vice squad and SWAT team to crashing a wedding (where she accidentally catches the bouquet). While finding her courage in the most unlikely of circumstances, Sherry ultimately finds herself. For midlifers, fatigued parents, and anyone who may be discontent with their life and looking to shake things up, try new things, or just escape, Finding My Badass Self is proof it's never too late to reinvent yourself--and that the best bucket list of all may be an unbucket list.

    The story captures the struggles of a family as it was pulled apart by poverty and alcohol, yet bound by witty—and sometimes ribald—humor.The cast of characters reads like fiction, but it is actually truth. There’s the father, the sarcastic, anti-government, alcoholic, and general ne’er-do-well. He moved his family from state to state, only to leave them again for years at a time in search of construction work. He’d return with empty pockets and bizarre interests such as ESP, pyramid power, and telekinesis. The mother, an Irish Catholic, stayed devoted to him.Her lack of education and access to transportation in a small town led to a dependence upon welfare.Two older sisters complete the picture, acting as sources of tension and strength throughout the book. And then there’s the narrator, the youngest—the snoop, the clown, and the observer.In the spirit of memoirs such as Blackbird and Angela’s Ashes, the narrative addresses serious issues while avoiding self-pity. Don’t Spend it All on Candy continuously comes back to the humor that sustained them while celebrating the tenacity that led all three daughters to break the cycle of poverty.

     And ladies, if you are carrying some extra weight and don't look or feel much like a marathon runner right now, you may be feeling a little overwhelmed by the wealth of marathon training advice out there...none of which seems relevant for you. DO NOT PANIC!!!! You have plenty of time to get yourself organised and prepared for the biggest adventure of your life....and plus size marathon runner and life coach Julie Creffield will walk you through every stage of the process with her unique mix of humour, realism and practicality. Covering everything from chesticle chaffing, to mingeries...swamp arse, to blister popping. This book goes where no other book dares to go, with its warts and all account of training as a larger lady. Julie committed to running her first marathon back in 2005 weighing in at 20 stone and unable to run to the top of her road. She has gone on to run 4 marathons, a 40 mile ultra marathon and hundreds of other races as well as inspiring and coaching thousands of women around the world to survive and thrive in the world of long distance running. As the creator of the award winning blog The Fat Girls Guide to Running she has transformed the landscape of plus size running, and has worked closely as a coach with more than 100 women to help them train for their first ever marathon. She knows the kind of doubts that women have about their own abilities, and the complexity of marathon training while working and raising a family. Many of the marathon training books out there are great in an ideal world, but let's face it, how many of us live in that ideal world. This is a marathon book for those of us in the real world...and you won't find a more honest account of what preparing for and completing your first marathon feels like. The book will cover everything from - Deciding if the distance is even for you - Securing your race place - Reviewing your habits and deciding your approach - Creating a robust and doable plan - The types of running sessions you need to include - How to get rid of the negative voices in your head - Avoiding injury - Fuelling your marathon journey - Building your support team - What to expect on race day - How to deal with the aftermath...and what to do with your medal This book will give you the confidence, know how and common sense to see you through what is sure to be some of the toughest months of training you will ever do. It will also help you see that so many of the skills and behaviours you pick up during marathon training are applicable to other areas of your life too. If you want to get to the start line and the finish line in one piece...this is the book for you.

    New York Times bestselling author, humorist, and newspaper columnist Michael Perry returns with a new collection of bite-sized essays from his Sunday Wisconsin State Journal column, “Roughneck Grace.” Perry’s perspectives on everything from cleaning the chicken coop to sharing a New York City elevator with supermodels will have you snorting with laughter on one page, blinking back tears on the next, and--no matter your zip code--nodding in recognition throughout.

    But for years Jenna Hollenstein worried that she was using alcohol for the wrong reasons. Though it didn't cause her to spiral out of control, drinking seemed to be detracting from her life in subtler ways: missed opportunities, unaddressed fears, challenges not taken, relationships not cherished, and creativity unexplored. Rather than a series of dramatic events often associated with alcoholism, her decision to stop drinking was based on years of introspection, pros and cons lists, and conversations with friends, family, and a wise therapist. Though she never "hit bottom," Hollenstein eventually realized that drinking was not enhancing her life: it was distracting her from it.

    From the author of Kiss My Tiara comes a funny and poignant collection of true stories about women coming of age that for once isn't about finding a date.