Last week I had an IQ so low that I sometimes forgot how to get home, and could barely stumble through sentences. This week I am the owner of the most advanced space station in the known universe and I wield powers that can alter reality itself. If I have the energy that my power is dependent upon... You see I get more energy every day, it's a set amount. I can stockpile it or burn it all up on one giant "upgrade" as I like to call it. This power comes from one of the wishes I made, yes, on a magical genie's lamp. I know that sounds crazy. So what do a Viking woman from 800AD, a U.S. Army combat veteran, and a fat gaming nerd have in common? Well, they're my team, and if I can save up enough energy I can use my new power to give them superpowers of their own. That's the plan at least. The problem with my plan is that I have some shadow organization looking for me. They'll kill me, my family, my friends, and everyone I have ever loved to get the lamp. What do they want? As far as I can tell they want to rewrite our universe into some kind of communist paradise where freewill comes second to safety and the government. I have to find some way to keep the lamp from the organization going after it that involves more than just hiding up in my space station. I refuse to be a hermit coward. I also have an ingrained need to help people, and now I have the power to do that. I have more resources at my disposal than any law enforcement agency on earth, and a team of people willing to help me. I want to be a hero, but I have no idea what I'm doing. Did I mention I was a barely functioning idiot last week? Content Warning: This book contains foul language, mild gore, and fictional politics.

     Kek has spent his life being treated like a dog, but he's only dog-like in appearance. You see, he's a kobold who originally came from a dungeon. And he's spent most of his life enslaved to a gang of exiled mercenaries hiding out in a deadly jungle. When Kek gains the power to see the hidden mechanics of reality and learns to "game" them to expand his skills and find hidden meanings, he is soon entrusted with a noble quest. He must return to the dungeon where he came from and rescue his people from servitude to the dungeon lord! Faced with untold dangers, Kek is going to need allies—such as a sweet muck fairy with a killer streak, a deadly-beautiful siren who fights best au natural, and a sensual cat woman with lightning quick moves. They are sure going to keep this lone kobold on his toes. Throughout this quest, Kek will learn the hard way that one of the greatest opponents a hero confronts is his own self-doubt. This is a LitRPG with a twist. There is no VR. The fantasy world is real. The game mechanics are part of a unique magical power that only the lucky few obtain. If you're not into this sort of thing, maybe it's time you give it a go. There's also a fun and adventure-packed story that will keep any fantasy reader engrossed right up until the end. Book two in the series is planned for launch early 2018!

    Try, "I was overcome by the urge to alphabetize my pets," or perhaps a simple "Had ninja trouble." Steve has used both these excuses, and here they are hilariously illustrated. He also has claimed to have become temporarily feral, accidentally sold himself on eBay, and gotten stuck in a romantic montage. An illustration of Steve with Darth Vader accompanies the inarguable excuse "I was seduced by the Dark Side." He also gets lost in his duvet, and discovers he has a rather unusual superpower.

    Why else would you be looking at this book? If you have ever wanted to see behind the front lines of retail, this is the book for you. If you want to validate your own experiences in retail, this is the book for you. If you just want to laugh at humorous things from funny people, this is the book for you. Packed full of true short stories from working in one of these super stores, only one conclusion can be reached in the end: Wal-Mart is the craziest place on Earth!

    Does she have what it takes?

     Reawakening the forces of magic... And letting in monsters of myth and their dark-elf masters. Now, the fate of all will fall upon two women gifted with magical powers and a veteran Special Forces soldier. If they fail, it won’t just be the end of the Dark-Elf War. It’ll be the end of all human life. *** Read the complete story now! Includes: - Book 1: Starlight - Book 2: Gunz - Book 3: Ranger The Dark Elf War trilogy by former army officer William Stacey is a thrilling blend of urban fantasy and military sci-fi. You’ll love these books for their breathless pacing, believable characters, and non-stop action. Get the complete Dark Elf War Trilogy, more than 1500 pages of magic, monsters, and Special Forces action. Grab all three now!

    It might be the last decision you ever make. Grab the entire series in one complete boxed set today! All 8 books are included! Resurrection of the Damned: Three months ago there was a demon invasion. Due to that, the world has been dealing with changes in just who the enemy really is.While old rules are thrown aside. The mercenary named Katie (or KatieDora by some) is trying to take a much-needed vacation. Unfortunately, both friends and foes want her in the worst possible way. Katie's Killers are facing a new reality, one where they are needed more because the world's eyes have just been uncovered. Sometimes it just doesn't pay to get up in the morning. No Quarter: The rules have changed. Now the Damned can go on vacation, and even hook up. Without Pandora near him, can Calvin get a little action in Cabo? Unfortunately, the general has a different demand of Katie coming from a whole industry. Requested to be in New York, Katie is working a side job or two. Her mercenary skills are useful, and profitable, for other types of hard jobs. And this time, the Damned can help a child. There will be hell to pay when Katie and Pandora come calling, with no quarter for the demons. Dark is the Night: This time it's about money. Well, some of it is about money. How is a Damned going to pay for her condo and keep up with the Joneses? Still in New York, Katie is working on creating an additional base for herself and her team as Pandora contemplates how she can mess up Calvin's love life. What will happen when Katie meets the woman who means the most to her?And what is Calvin going to do, since the gang in Mexico is not giving up?Dark is the night when the heroes come out to play. Dim Glows the Horizon: It's all about a good time. Katie has the ability and desire to see Brock again, and show him and his guys agood time. Will that include any special time for the two of them? (Pandora hopes so). That stranger left a message about a sword and Armor... But is Pandora willing to help or does she even know what he was talking about?Someone is stalking Calvin's girlfriend. He has to ask a couple of humans he respects for a little help—even if they won't remember who he is. Even in the middle of a war, humans will always want some hope for the future. Plus: Waking the Leviathan Subversive Giants Juntto Redemption " *****Be warned...

     The first story is a special Valentine's Book soon to be released in late January! Author's Note: All stories are intended for 18+ and are stand alone romances with a HEA.

    Funny jokes, Knock Knock jokes, Kids Jokes.Jokes for Kids, Best Joke Book for Kids is styled for as kids grow older they find certain jokes less and less funny. This means you have to come up with age appropriate jokes to keep them entertained. Jokes are more than just for laughs. They also stimulate thought and educate. That does not mean you go stiff on the kids, far from it. You want jokes that are funny, corny and have some substance. Usually the really good jokes will give even you the tickles.Kids jokes, with over 200 funny jokes, this will keep the kids, and adult laughing for some time.

    Magic’s memory is longer, and far more dangerous. After a century spent as a tree, Finn awakens into a world she barely recognizes. Dark shapes lurk just out of sight, watching her every move as she tries to regain the memories of her past. As if by fate, travelers are drawn to her side. Scholars, thieves, and Iseult, a sellsword who seems to know more about her past than he’s letting on. When one of Finn’s companions is taken by the Faie, she will be forced to make a choice: rescue a woman she barely knows, or leave her newfound friends behind in search of an ancient relic that may hold the answers she so desperately seeks. Enter a world of Enchantment, filled with Celtic lore, magic, and just a touch of romance. Now a complete series! This set includes: -Tree of Ages -The Melted Sea Other books in the series: -The Blood Forest -Queen of Wands -The Oaken Throne

    Illustrator and writer's Carolyn Marie Castagna's first shared short story.A small icicle hanging from a roof peers inside a window at a small reading room, and learns about magical human qualities, and the importance of the one most special human feeling.

    Over 2000 pages of awesome reading! Her blood is fire…and she’s going to burn the whole place down... Amber’s life on the Fringe is simple. Serve those above her, keep her highly unpopular opinions to herself, and above all…don’t stir things up. Unfortunately, for a girl with fire in her blood, that’s not easy. On the day of Collection, when all towns across the Fringe give tribute to those they serve, Amber’s world turns upside down. A dark secret from her past is revealed, and her sister taken into a life of slavery. Suddenly, Amber finds herself setting off on a perilous journey she never anticipated, venturing to the heart of the ruling city of Olympus with her best friend, Jude, to get her sister back. Facing great odds, and men and women of strange and mystical power, Amber must quickly adapt to survive. And, more importantly, save those she loves. Will she succeed in reuniting her family, or fall into darkness? The Chosen is set within a dystopian future that is unlike anything you’ve read before. Prepare to lose yourself in a fantastical world where nothing is quite as it seems. Included in this collection: 1. The Chosen 2. Trial of the Chosen 3. Blood of the Chosen 4. March of the Chosen 5. War of the Chosen 6. Fall of the Chosen 7. Rise of the Chosen 8. Fate of the Chosen

    Fans of Fruits Basket, rejoice! Natsuki Takaya is back with the first of three new chapters in the Fruits Basket story revolving around The Three Musketeers, and you can read it digitally at the same time as Japan! Our favorite trio takes center stage, as Shigure and Ayame descend on Hatori for an impromptu Three Musketeers' banquet and hijinks ensue!(SPOILER WARNING) This story takes place around the same time as the last chapter of Fruits Basket, so for those who haven't read all of the manga, please proceed with caution!

    Doctor Ravinder Shah speaking. No case too weird, no problem too bizarre. Strangeness a speciality. How can I help you?” London Social Worker Rav Shah moonlights as a paranormal detective, aided by one of his clients and a Border Collie he rents by the hour. It was supposed to be a bit of fun: a search for truths out there; a quest for a life more interesting than the one that fate, destiny, and personal apathy had granted him. But then a case involving a Yorkshire farmer and a herd of flying pigs leads him into a world darker and more dangerous than he’d ever dreamed. The truth is indeed out there. And it’s got Rav square in its sights.

    What the what?! Is there really a secret treasure hidden in the school’s basement?! Based on Cartoon Network’s award-winning original series, Gumball and Darwin head back to school! It’s a brand-new collection of shorts and illustrations featuring everyone’s favorite mischief-makers.