Book picks similar to
Fart Squad by Seamus Pilger
humor
middle-grade
kids
childrens-books
The Doldrums
Nicholas Gannon - 2015
Helmsley has grown up in a house full of oddities and treasures collected by his grandparents, the famous explorers. He knows every nook and cranny. He knows them all too well. After all, ever since his grandparents went missing on an iceberg, his mother barely lets him leave the house.Archer longs for adventure. Grand adventures, with parachutes and exotic sunsets and interesting characters. But how can he have an adventure when he can’t leave his house?It helps that he has friends like Adélaïde L. Belmont, who must have had many adventures to end up with a wooden leg. (Perhaps from a run-in with a crocodile. Perhaps not.) And Oliver Glub. Oliver will worry about all the details (so that Archer doesn’t have to).And so Archer, Adélaïde, and Oliver make a plan. A plan to get out of the house, out of their town entirely. It’s a good plan.Well, it’s not bad, anyway.But nothing goes quite as they expect.
Magic Marks the Spot
Caroline Carlson - 2013
“My dear,” he said, “let me be clear: You are a young lady. You will not tell silly tales and you will never be a pirate.”Hilary Westfield has always dreamed of being a pirate. She can tread water for thirty-seven minutes. She can tie a knot faster than a fleet of sailors. She particularly enjoys defying authority, and she already owns a rather pointy sword. There’s only one problem: The Very Nearly Honorable League of Pirates refuses to let any girl join their ranks of scourges and scallywags.Girls belong at Miss Pimm’s Finishing School for Delicate Ladies, learning to waltz, faint, and cursty. But Hilary and her dearest friend, the gargoyle, have no use for such frivolous lessons—they are pirates! (Or very nearly.)To escape from a life of petticoats and politeness, Hilary answers a curious advertisement for a pirate crew and suddenly finds herself swept up in a seafaring adventure that may or may not involve a map without an X, a magical treasure that likely doesn’t exist, a rogue governess who insists on propriety, a crew of misfit scallywags, and the most treacherous—and unexpected—villain on the High Seas.Will Hilary find the treasure in time? Will she become a true pirate after all? And what will become of the gargoyle?
Two Dogs in a Trench Coat Go to School
Julie Falatko - 2018
They keep out squirrels and imminent intruders. They make sure there are no stray meatballs or muffin crumbs in the kitchen. And most of all, they protect their boy, Stewart. But something is wrong. Every day Stewart trudges off to an awful place called school. The dogs know it's awful because Stewart's parents ask him what he does at school, and he says, "Nothing." And he smells like a weird mixture of boredom and anxiety. They have to save him! Plus maybe there's an evil overlord! Or a squirrel!Waldo and Sassy hatch a plan to save Stewart by disguising themselves as a human. They can be a new student! Have they figured out any other aspect of their plan? Nope. They'll just figure it out as they go along. That's sure to work. But they find out that being a human student isn't quite what they imagined. There's gym (frisbee!), music (singing!), an alleged bully, and a teacher who is deeply suspicious of this new student. And best of all, they get lunch.This book kicks off the "Two Dogs in a Trench Coat" series. Be sure to read to learn if Waldo and Sassy can save Stewart from the evil overlord, if they can use their sad puppy eyes to get more than one lunch, and if they can get all the humans to think they're good dogs without actually revealing the fact that they are, you know, dogs.
Frozen: The Junior Novelization
Sarah Nathan - 2013
Teaming up with an adventurer named Kristoff and his reindeer, Sven, Anna searches for her sister, Elsa, whose icy powers have trapped the kingdom in eternal winter. Enjoy this retelling with eight pages of full-color scenes from the film!
Changeling
William Ritter - 2019
To renew it, goblins must perform an ancient ritual involving the rarest of their kind—a newborn changeling. But when the fateful night arrives to trade a human baby for a goblin one, something goes terribly wrong. After laying the changeling in a human infant’s crib, the goblin Kull is briefly distracted from his task. By the time he turns back, the changeling has already perfectly mimicked the human child. Too perfectly: Kull cannot tell them apart. Not knowing which to bring back, he leaves both babies behind.Tinn and Cole are raised as human twins, neither knowing what secrets may be buried deep inside one of them. Then when they are twelve years old, a mysterious message arrives, calling the brothers to be heroes and protectors of magic. The boys must leave behind their sleepy town of Endsborough and risk their lives in the Wild Wood, crossing the perilous Oddmire swamp and journeying through the Deep Dark to reach the goblin horde and discover who they truly are.
Pickle: The (Formerly) Anonymous Prank Club of Fountain Point Middle School
Kim Baker - 2012
Ben: who began it all by sneaking in one night and filling homeroom with ball-pit balls.Frank: who figured out that an official club, say a pickle making club, could receive funding from the PTA.Oliver: who once convinced half of the class that his real parents had found him and he was going to live in a submarine.Bean: who wasn't exactly invited, but her parents own a costume shop, which comes in handy if you want to dress up like a giant squirrel and try to scare people at the zoo.TOGETHER, they are an unstoppable prank-pulling force, and Fountain Point Middle School will never be the same.
Demon Dentist
David Walliams - 2013
Strange things were happening in the dead of night. Children would put a tooth under their pillow for the tooth fairy, but in the morning they would wake up to find… a dead slug; a live spider; hundreds of earwigs creeping and crawling beneath their pillow.Evil was at work. But who or what was behind it…?
Operation Bunny
Sally Gardner - 2012
But a fairy-hating witch, a mischievous set of golden keys, and a train full of brightly coloured bunnies are just a few of the surprises that come with it.With the help of a talking cat called Fidget and a grumpy fairy detective called Buster, it's up to Emily to get to the bottom of Operation Bunny.
The Adventures of Miss Petitfour
Anne Michaels - 2015
The first book for children by an internationally acclaimed novelist and poet. Miss Petitfour enjoys having adventures that are "just the right size - fitting into a single, magical day." She is an expert at baking and eating fancy iced cakes, and her favorite mode of travel is par avion. On windy days, she takes her sixteen cats out for an airing: Minky, Misty, Taffy, Purrsia, Pirate, Mustard, Moutarde, Hemdela, Earring, Grigorovitch, Clasby, Captain Captain, Captain Catkin, Captain Cothespin, Your Shyness and Sizzles. With the aid of her favorite tea party tablecloth as a makeshift balloon, Miss Petitfour and her charges fly over her village, having many little adventures along the way. Join Miss Petitfour and her equally eccentric felines on five magical outings -- a search for marmalade, to a spring jumble sale, on a quest for "birthday cheddar", the retrieval of a lost rare stamp and as they compete in the village's annual Festooning Festival. A whimsical, beautifully illustrated collection of tales that celebrates language, storytelling and small pleasures, especially the edible kind!
Destiny, Rewritten
Kathryn Fitzmaurice - 2013
Meanwhile, even though her English-professor mother insists that Emily is destined to become a poet (she named her after Emily Dickinson!), Emily secretly corresponds with her idol, romance writer Danielle Steel.As Publishers Weekly says, "Fitzmaurice's story deftly mingles Dickinson, Danielle Steel, a budding crush, and protesting tree sitters while maintaining suspense that leads to a satisfying ending."
The Fairy's Mistake
Gail Carson Levine - 1999
Rosella is kind and helpful. Her reward: Jewels and gems tumble out of her mouth whenever she speaks. Myrtle is rude and spiteful. Her punishment: Bugs and vipers slither out of her mouth. The fairy Ethelinda feels she's meted out justice just right--until she discovers Rosella has been locked up by a greedy prince and Myrtle is having the time of her life!
Elliot and the Goblin War
Jennifer A. Nielsen - 2010
95 CHILDREN successfully read the first chapter, but upon beginning chapter 2, they started BLABBERING in some language known only as "flibberish." 38 CHILDREN made it halfway through this wretched book before they began SUCKING THEIR THUMBS THROUGH THEIR NOSES.If you're VERY BRAVE, perhaps you are willing to TAKE YOUR CHANCES. Be sure that you have told your family who gets your favorite toys if you DO NOT SURVIVE this book. Read it now, IF YOU DARE. But don't say you haven't been warned, for this is the story that unfolds the MYSTERIES OF THE UNDERWORLD.Book Details:
Format: Hardcover
Publication Date: 10/1/2010
Pages: 208
Reading Level: Age 8 and Up
Crunch
Leslie Connor - 2010
Suddenly everyone needs a bike. And nobody wants to wait.Meanwhile, the crunch has stranded Dewey's parents far up north with an empty fuel tank and no way home. It's up to Dewey and his older sister, Lil, to look after their younger siblings and run the bike shop all on their own.Each day Dewey and his siblings feel their parents' absence more and more. The Marriss Bike Barn is busier than ever. And just when he is starting to feel crunched himself, Dewey discovers that bike parts are missing from the shop. He's sure he knows who's responsible—or does he? Will exposing the thief only make more trouble for Dewey and his siblings?Award-winning author Leslie Connor has created another timely family story infused with humor and hope.
Awful End
Philip Ardagh - 2000
Eddie Dickens is sent off to stay with his aunt and uncle and a riotously funny comedy of errors ensues. When both Eddie Dickens's parents catch a disease that makes them turn yellow, go a bit crinkly around the edges, and smell of hot water bottles, it's agreed he should go and stay with relatives at their house, Awful End. Unfortunately for Eddie, those relatives are Mad Uncle Jack and Even-Madder Aunt Maud. . . . This hilarious historical spoof, the first in the Eddie Dickens trilogy, has been called ""a scrumptious cross between Dickens and Monty Python.""
