No Reading Allowed: The WORST Read-Aloud Book Ever
Raj Haldar - 2020
And sometimes two words that sound alike can be spelled completely differently. Ptolemy the pterodactyl is back to show us all how absurd and fun language can be when homophones, homonyms, and tricky punctuation are at play!No Reading Allowed allows children and their parents to laugh together while also learning something new. Perfect for baby gifts, birthday gifts, teacher gifts, and anyone who finds humor in the absurdity of the English language.
Rupert's Snowman
Phillipa Warden - 2020
Sledging, building snowmen, making snow angels and having snowball fights. But wait! What is this? Why is Rupert racing back up the hill? Join him and his mummy as they are forced to embark on a Snowy Adventure Rescue...
Take Me Out of the Bathtub and Other Silly Dilly Songs
Alan Katz - 2001
"Take Me Out to the
Ballgame"
and
"I've Been Working on the
Railroad"?
Well, forget 'em!
Songwriter and comedy writer extraordinaire Alan Katz has turned those and other old favorites on their ears and created new nonsense songs kids will love. With zany, spirited pictures by illustrator and cartoonist David Catrow, this kooky collection guarantees laughs and plenty of silly dillyness for kids everywhere!
Yes Day!
Amy Krouse Rosenthal - 2009
With humor and appreciation for life's little pleasures, Yes Day! captures the excitement of being a kid.
If You Ever Want to Bring a Piano to the Beach, Don't!
Elise Parsley - 2016
She is NOT talking about the piano. But Magnolia is a little girl with a big idea, determination, and one very heavy upright piano that, she insists, she needs to take with her. What's the worst that can happen? In a riotous series of mishaps, Magnolia quickly learns that--not surprisingly--a piano doesn't mix well with sand, sun, and seagulls!
You Have to Fucking Eat
Adam Mansbach - 2014
Profane, loving, and deeply cathartic, You Have to Fucking Eat breaks the code of child-rearing silence, giving moms and dads new, old, grand-, and expectant a much-needed chance to laugh about a universal problem.A perfect gift book like the smash hit Go the Fuck to Sleep (over 1.5 million copies sold worldwide!), You Have to Fucking Eat perfectly captures Adam Mansbach's trademark humor, which is simultaneously affectionate and radically honest. You probably shouldn't read it to your kids.Adam Mansbach is the author of the #1 international bestseller Go the Fuck to Sleep, as well as the novels Rage Is Back, Angry Black White Boy, The Dead Run, and The End of the Jews, winner of the California Book Award. He has written for the New Yorker, the New York Times, Esquire, the Believer, and National Public Radio’s All Things Considered. His daughter Vivien is six.Owen Brozman has illustrated for National Geographic, Time Out New York, Scholastic, Ninja Tune, Definitive Jux, and numerous other clients. He and Mansbach recently collaborated on the acclaimed graphic novel Nature of the Beast, and his work has been recognized by the Society of Illustrators of Los Angeles, Creative Quarterly, 3x3 magazine, and many more. He lives in Brooklyn, New York, with his wife and daughter, whose favorite food is bananas.
Walter the Farting Dog
William Kotzwinkle - 2001
Walter is a fine dog, except for one small problem: he has gas. He can't help it; it's just the way he is. Fortunately, the kids Billy and Betty love him regardless, but Father says he's got to go! Poor Walter, he's going to the dog pound tomorrow. And then, in the night, burglars strike. Walter has his chance to be a hero. A children's beloved classic, this story will have kids rolling on the floor with laughter. Adults are permitted to laugh too.
Dory Fantasmagory
Abby Hanlon - 2014
Jones and Ivy & Bean! Here comes a lovably energetic little sister with a BIG personality—and an imagination to match!As the youngest in her family, Dory really wants attention, and more than anything she wants her brother and sister to play with her. But she’s too much of a baby for them, so she’s left to her own devices—including her wild imagination and untiring energy. Her siblings may roll their eyes at her childish games, but Dory has lots of things to do: outsmarting the monsters all over the house, escaping from prison (aka time-out), and exacting revenge on her sister’s favorite doll. And when they really need her, daring Dory will prove her bravery, and finally get exactly what she has been looking for.With plenty of pictures bursting with charm and character, this hilarious book about an irresistible rascal is the new must-read for the chapter book set.
Fat Camp Commandos
Daniel Pinkwater - 2001
Revenge was never so sweet...or so funny!Fed up with the systematic jeering and abuse at Camp Noo Yoo, where frantic parents send their pudgy little darlings in the hopes that they will shed a few of those socially unacceptable pounds, Ralph and Sylvia Nebula and their friend, Mavis Goldfarb, hop a bus back to Pokooksie. There, they seek revenge. Revenge on their parents. Revenge on Dr. Frizzbender, founder of Anti-Fat day. And revenge on Richard "Dick" Tator, the overweight and overbearing owner of Camp Noo Yoo.
Once Upon an Alphabet: Short Stories for all the Letters
Oliver Jeffers - 2014
In this menagerie we have stories made of words, made FOR all the letters. The most inventive and irresistible book of the year spans a mere 26 letters (don't they all!) and 112 pages. From an Astronaut who's afraid of heights, to a Bridge that ends up burned between friends, to a Cup stuck in a cupboard and longing for freedom, Once Upon an Alphabet is a creative tour de force from A through Z. Slyly funny in a way kids can't resist, and gorgeously illustrated in a way readers of all ages will pour over, this series of interconnected stories and characters explores the alphabet in a way that will forever raise the bar. In Once Upon an Alphabet, #1 New York Times bestseller Oliver Jeffers has created a stunning collection of words and artwork that is a story book, alphabet book, and gorgeously designed art book all in one.Praise for ONCE UPON AN ALPHABET: * "The silly, spare, slightly surreal text occasionally rhymes and endlessly surprises. An utterly delightful alphabet book."–Kirkus Review, starred review * "An altogether stimulating, surprising, and satisfying reading experience."–School Library Journal, starred review "Jeffers knows how to catch the attention of his young audience while challenging their imagination, intellect and vocabulary. This whimsical exploration of letters and language begs to be read over and over again."–Book Page
Dragons at Crumbling Castle: And Other Stories
Terry Pratchett - 2014
It’s a disaster!Luckily, there’s a spare suit of armour and a very small boy called Ralph who’s willing to fill it. Together with Fortnight the Friday knight and Fossfiddle the wizard, Ralph sets out to defeat the fearsome fire-breathers.But there's a teeny weeny surprise in store . . .Fourteen fantastically funny stories from master storyteller Sir Terry Pratchett, full of time travel and tortoises, monsters and mayhem!‘So funny I dropped my spoon laughing!’ – King Arthur
Darth Vader and Son
Jeffrey Brown - 2012
Celebrated artist Jeffrey Brown's delightful illustrations give classic Star Wars moments a fresh twist, presenting the trials and joys of parenting through the lens of a galaxy far, far away. Life lessons include lightsaber batting practice, using the Force to raid the cookie jar, Take Your Child to Work Day on the Death Star ("Er, he looks just like you, Lord Vader!"), and the special bond shared between any father and son.
The Legend of Rock Paper Scissors
Drew Daywalt - 2017
Now read the legend of how it all began . . .Long ago, in an ancient and distant realm called the Kingdom of Backyard, there lived a warrior named ROCK.Meanwhile in the Empire of Mom’s Home Office, a second great warrior sought the glory of battle. And his name was PAPER.At the same time, in the Kitchen Realm, in the tiny village of Junk Drawer, lived a third warrior. They called her SCISSORS.These three were the strongest, smartest, and fastest in all the land. Time and again they beat the most fearsome opponents they could find: an apricot, a computer printer—even frozen, breaded, dinosaur-shaped chicken nuggets! But when the warriors finally meet each other, the most epic round of battles begins . . . and never ends. That is why, to this day, children around the world honor these worthy adversaries by playing ROCK, PAPER, SCISSORS!
You're Only Old Once!: A Book for Obsolete Children
Dr. Seuss - 1986
Seuss creates a classic picture-book ode to aging in You're Only Old Once! On a visit to "the Golden Years Clinic on Century Square for Spleen Readjustment and Muffler Repair," readers will laugh with familiar horror at the poking and prodding and testing and ogling that go hand in hand with the dreaded appellation of "senior citizen." Though Dr. Seuss is known for his peerless work in books for children, this comical look at what it's like to get older is ideal for Seuss fans of advanced years. In his own words, this is "a book for obsolete children." A perfect gift for retirement, birthdays, and holidays!
All My Friends Are Dead
Avery Monsen - 2010
In other words, perfect."
- The Huffington PostAn amusing and captivating tale that's a delightful primer for laughing at the inevitable: If you're a dinosaur, all of your friends are dead. If you're a pirate, all of your friends have scurvy. If you're a tree, all of your friends are end tables. Each page of this laugh-out-loud, illustrated humor book showcases the downside of being everything from a clown to a cassette tape to a zombie. Cute and dark all at once, this hilarious children's book for adults teaches valuable lessons about life.From the sock whose only friends have gone missing to the houseplant whose friends are being slowly killed by irresponsible plant owners (like you), All My Friends Are Dead presents hilariously entertaining stories about life and existential predicaments.The simple yet effective imagery, the personification of inanimate objects, and short, hilarious quips come together to create an amusing adventure through each character's unique grievance and wide-eyed dilemmas.Written by Avery Monsen, an actor, artist, and writer and Jory John, a writer, editor, and journalist. They are friends, and neither is dead. Yet.All My Friends Are Dead is both the saddest funny book and the funniest sad book you'll ever read.Children's book written for adults Displayed in an accessible cartoon form