How NOT to RV; The Rvers Guide to RVing in the Absurd (The How NOT To Guides)


Jennifer Flower - 2011
    Here's what some have said:- "I had a great time reading (and laughing out loud)"- "hard to put down, easy to pick up"- "funniest bumpy ride ever ... stand-up comics take note"- "Hilarious mishaps and thought-provoking reflections"- "I was fascinated from beginning to end" RVs, RVing, and how (NOT) to RV by a recovering New York psychoanalyst on a trip to nowhere in particular. Whether you're a woman traveling alone, a family looking for budget travel, or a retiree seeking adventure in retirement, here you'll find travel tips, camping advice, trip planning, how to buy an RV, and how to screw up on all of it, still have a great time, and maybe even change your life. These are the bloopers that most RVers won't tell you. If you're planning a road trip in a motor home, a travel trailer, or modified hearse these cautionary but inspirational tales will help you avoid the most common RVing mistakes. So you've waited until now to hit the road. That's OK, because here, finally, are the missing, very specific instructions on how NOT to do it but how to get out there anyway, how to have a great adventure, conquering fear one failure at a time.

Six-Gun Snow White


Catherynne M. Valente - 2013
    Picture instead a masterfully evoked Old West where you are more likely to find coyotes as the seven dwarves. Insert into this scene a plain-spoken, appealing narrator who relates the history of our heroine’s parents—a Nevada silver baron who forced the Crow people to give up one of their most beautiful daughters, Gun That Sings, in marriage to him. Although her mother’s life ended as hers began, so begins a remarkable tale: equal parts heartbreak and strength. This girl has been born into a world with no place for a half-native, half-white child. After being hidden for years, a very wicked stepmother finally gifts her with the name Snow White, referring to the pale skin she will never have. Filled with fascinating glimpses through the fabled looking glass and a close-up look at hard living in the gritty gun-slinging West, this is an utterly enchanting story…at once familiar and entirely new.

Stash Envy: And Other Quilting Confessions And Adventures


Lisa Boyer - 2005
    And she's determined to enjoy making quilts. In fact, she will not -- absolutely will not -- let the risk of making a mistake, or a less-than- perfect quilt, keep her from relishing the task! In the 34 chapters of this new book, Lisa covers: The need for new fabric colors -- "blurple," "rorange," and "brellow," to name a few; The virtues of lumps in a quilt; How to share your bum fat quarter at a fabric exchange; How crocheting doilies will drive you back to quilting; How to cope when your quilts lack depth and dimension. Lisa Boyer is a breeze of fresh air. She brings you back to the pleasure of quilting with her confessions and adventures in Stash Envy!

The Risks of Sunbathing Topless: And Other Funny Stories from the Road


Kate Chynoweth - 2005
    If they had, we wouldn't hear the delicious details of how horribly wrong it all went. Like Marrit Ingman's disastrous honeymoon in Maui—and the repercussions of societal pressure for the perfect love escape in paradise. Or of how the entire kitchen of C. Lill Ahrens's new Seoul apartment is literally lost in translation. Or why Ayun Halliday would attempt to climb Mount Kilimanjaro, when her training consisted of drinking beer and rolling her own cigarettes, and her gear cost $14.99 at Sportmart. From Kandahar to Baja to Moscow, these wry, amusing stories capture the comic essence of bad travel, and of the female experience on the road.Roughly translated / C. Lill Ahrens --Kilimanjaro / Ayun Halliday --Hamil's house of fun / Kay Sexton --I could do this in my sleep / Karin Palmquist --Adventure Pete / L.A. Miller --Constipated in Palinuro / Judith Levin --The trail / Erica J. Green --How to travel with a man / Kate Chynoweth --A useful and comprehensive travel dictionary for girls / Buzzy Jackson --Tri training in Russia / Mara Vorhees --Worry warts / Lisa Taggart --In search of Sami / Ann Lombardi --Bigger than France / Spike Gillespie --Souvenirs from Ecuador / Bethany Gumper --Heading South / Samantha Schoech --Knocked off my high horse in New Zealand / Catherine Giayvia --The lion sleeps tonight / Sarah Franklin --No strings attached / Paige Porter --Y2K in Kandahar / Hannah Bloch --Prada on the Plaka / Michele Peterson --Honeymoon in Hell / Marrit Ingman --The occidental tourist / Judy Wolf

Young Ravens And Hidden Blades: A Short Tale From Norse America


Colin Taber - 2013
    If you have already discovered Colin Taber’s alternate history setting, The United States of Vinland (USV), this short takes place in Markland (what we know as Labrador, around 1000 years ago), and is placed in that timeline midway between USV#1: The Landing and USV#2: Loki’s Rage. Familiarity with the broader USV series and characters is not required. This short story is approximately 30 pages long and is a standalone ebook. For paperback readers of USV, this tale will be included in the front of USV#2: Loki’s Rage as bonus material.

Never Stop Shutting Up: A Book of Advice and Other Things You Didn't Ask For


Mike Falzone - 2012