Book picks similar to
The Female Dominant: Games She Plays by Claudia Varrin


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Sexual Outsiders: Understanding BDSM Sexualities and Communities


David M. Ortmann - 2012
    While misunderstandings surrounding these communities prevail, BDSM sexuality cuts across race, gender, nationality, and sexual orientation. BDSM describes forms of sexuality that incorporate restraint, pressure, sensation, training, and elements of both erotic and non-erotic power exchange between the engaged parties. Some BDSM "scenes" include role-playing, spanking, blindfolds, ropes, and erotic costuming. Sexual Outsiders is designed as a guide for BDSM community members who must wade through the quagmire of unique problems they face: coming out to family, friends and partners; distinguishing abusive relationships from healthy consensual ones; finding and developing community; overcoming shame and denial; exploring whether BDSM sexuality can be a healing tool; gaining access to quality, culturally competent psychotherapy; and finding strategies to develop a healthy sexual self-esteem in the face of current medical and social standards that view them as sick or pathological. The book also serves as an educational primer for those whose partners, friends, and family members are involved in BDSM. In terms of challenges faced by BDSM communities, the most significant is living with a stigmatized sexuality shame, prejudice, discrimination, isolation, depression, and a lack of adequate, competent mental health care. Issues such as coming out as a sexual minority, finding community and partners, and dealing with scenes and relationships that go wrong are some the common experiences shared by members of BDSM communities. Sexual Outsiders employs common sense, good humor, and vivid anecdotes while incorporating basic ideas about human behavior, psychology, philosophy, interviews, history, and clinical case studies to illustrate the real lives and experiences of men and women in BDSM communities. Anyone wanting to learn more about this unique, and more-common-than-you-think expression of sexuality, will find in these pages insight into the various challenges BDSM practitioners face, and the many strengths that people in the BDSM communities have developed in the face of social stigma and prejudice.

Jay Wiseman's Erotic Bondage Handbook


Jay Wiseman - 2000
    It has the potential to enrich your life enrich your relationship and can even be a means of profound personal growth. This 6" x 9" softbound 323-page handbook is a compendium of sensible sensational advice about how to tie up your sweetie or get tied up yourself! It is an essential read for anyone interested in bondage... as intelligent and entertaining as it is informative.

Bow Down: Lessons from Dominatrixes on How to Be a Boss in Life, Love, and Work


Lindsay Goldwert - 2021
    Where women not only stop apologizing, but seize—and enjoy—control. This is the quickly mainstreaming world of BDSM (bondage, discipline, sadism, masochism)—and it has a lot to teach women about empowerment, negotiation, open-mindedness, and more. Journalist Lindsay Goldwert, intrigued by this seismic cultural shift, traveled across the United States to meet the stars of the subculture, who spoke frankly with her about their lives and work. In this “lively, funny, thoughtful channeling of wisdom” (Sara Benincasa, author of Real Artists Have Day Jobs), these Alpha women show you how you can reset the power dynamic in any situation to get what you want—whether it’s from a husband, a boss, or partner. They share strategies for revolutionizing not only your sex life, but your career, your relationships, and most importantly, your inner foundations. With bondage gear popping up on the big screen, the runway, the red carpet, and in celebrity lingerie lines, BDSM is officially moving out of the dungeon and into the sun. Let Bow Down help you learn how to use it. “Whether your fantasies lie in the bedroom or the boardroom, Lindsay will give you the courage to go forth and dominate.” (Sarah Cooper, author of How to Be Successful without Hurting Men’s Feelings).

BDSM The Naked Truth


Charley Ferrer - 2011
    Charley Ferrer pulls back the leather curtain and exposes the world of Dominance and submission. Whether you're a novice, curious seeker, or have been dabbling in power exchange relationships for some time, BDSM The Naked Truth provides valuable information and dispels many of the misconceptions in this often misrepresented and highly erotic lifestyle. Doctor Charley reveals why men and women seek bondage, discipline and sadomasochistic activities; why a submissive yearns to surrender; and why a Dominant nourishes that craving. Discover the affection, respect and love expressed during these interactions. BDSM--it's not who you love but HOW you love them!

Shibari You Can Use: Japanese Rope Bondage and Erotic Macram


Lee Harrington - 2007
    Bondage artist and educator Lee Bridgett Harrington takes you step-by-step through a variety of concepts and ties, giving you the tools to make aesthetically rewarding rope work. Each tutorial is broken down into easy to follow photographs by Circle23 with detailed descriptions, including how to tie all those knots (first secret of Japanese bondage revealed- there are only a few simple knots). From restrictive poses that limit movement to decorative rope work that accentuates the human form, Shibari You Can Use includes instruction on creating: - Shinju (Chest Harnesses) - Gyakuebi (Asian Style Hogtie) - Ebi or Kuri (Shrimp or Ball ties) - Rope Corsets - Strap-on Harnesses and Crotch Ropes - ...and much more! Shake off your fears of looking silly the first time you tie someone up, get some rope, and you too can learn Japanese rope bondage.

Concertina: The Life And Loves Of A Dominatrix


Susan Winemaker - 1972
    'Concertina' is a memoir of a young woman's experiences working as a professional chef and dominatrix - her passions, loves, thoughts and feelings.

The Seductive Art of Japanese Bondage


Midori - 2001
    Now, accomplished Japanese-born pro-domme and bondage practitioner Midori shows step by step how to achieve beautiful and exciting Japanese bondage on a variety of genders and body types.Each chapter starts with a spectacular, tasteful full-color photo of the finished bondage pose -- harnesses, hogties, standing and bent-over poses, and more -- then goes back and explains with text and line art how each rope and knot is placed to achieve the final result. Readers can use the detailed instructions to experiment safely and erotically with their own partners -- or simply enjoy viewing the pictures of Midori's expertise.

Her New Toy (BDSM Femdom Erotica) (Her Toy 1)


Margeaux Adler - 2014
    They share one important passion: female dominance in the bedroom.Her last relationship ended when she told her ex about her interest in using a strap-on. Can Rob handle Elyse’s femdom desires?For adults only, “Her New Toy” is a 7,500 word story featuring:BDSMFemdomStrap-on sexCFNM (Clothed Female Naked Male)Orgasm control/Orgasm denialAnal sexOral sexMasturbationToy useFrom the story:Rob groaned and his eyes fluttered shut for a moment. “I do want to please you, Mistress. I do.”“And how would you please me, slut?” Before he could answer, she slid her hand down and cupped him.“Thank you, Mistress,” he said. His eyes closed completely now and he pushed his hips toward her. “I’d please you however you wanted, Mistress.”“Do you remember what I told you last night?”“I’m not sure, Mistress. I’m sorry. You said a lot of things to me.”Silly slut, she thought.“I said I wanted to be rough with you, slut,” she said, tightening her grip on him until he gasped and squirmed.

How to be a Healthy and Happy Submissive


Kate Kinsey - 2014
    Whether you want to explore your own submissive fantasies, or you're just curious about what BDSM is really like, this book will answer all your questions, plus some you didn't know you had. Erotic author Kate Kinsey ("Red," and "The Totally Uncensored Kinky Adventures of Chloe St. Claire, Sex Slave") brings over a decade of experience as a submissive and kinky educator to this practical step-by-step guide to being a healthy and happy submissive. Topics covered include: the differences between dominants and masters, submissives and slaves, and tops and bottoms; the different dominant styles; the truth about "training" to be a submissive; how to find like-minded folks in your area; how to negotiate scenes and relationships; what to expect at your first dungeon party; why some people actually enjoy pain; and the warning signs to look out for when talking to potential partners. "Kinsey has written a no-nonsense guide that thoroughly explains the various kinks and fetishes that come under the umbrella of BDSM. Most importantly, she emphasizes the importance of protecting yourself along the way with knowledge, friends and self-awareness." "This is not fiction, but reality. Kate Kinsey has the experience to tell it like it is, not the way some vanilla writer imagines it to be."

Master's Manual


Jack Rinella - 1994
    In this book he relays personal experience of leatherfolk, scenes, kink and becoming a successful leather top. Written in an addictive first-person format, The Master's Manual offers insights into the gay leather community and how to find your stride with domination, submission and play. Covering multiple topics in quickly-digestible chapters, The Master's Manual is a compendium of light-bite advice to offer answers to your questions and provide guidance to assist you in your endeavors. No subject is too taboo for Rinella as he guides you through his personal experiences and annotates them with retrospective advice to sate your curiosity about all aspects of the gay leather scene. 199 pages.

Mind Play: A Guide to Erotic Hypnosis


Mark Wiseman - 2013
    Many of us know that hypnosis doesn't really have the kind of mind-melting power we see in movies. Still, we can't help but get turned on at the thought of either controlling someone, or being controlled by someone, into doing things we've been told we shouldn't do ... but really, inside, kind of want to.In this book, Mark Wiseman (Wiseguy) will teach you how to put your partner into a hypnotic trance safely and effectively. Then the fun begins as you learn how to:Create or intensify arousal and desire Turn their entire body into an erogenous zone eager for your touch Get kinky with hypnotic bondage, flogging, or tickling Give them intense pleasure using his Five-Point Palm Exploding Orgasm technique and more! Whether you are new to hypnosis or have already learned the basics, Mind Play will give you the tools you need to become a skilled, responsible erotic hypnotist.

Techniques of Pleasure: BDSM and the Circuits of Sexuality


Margot Weiss - 2011
    Margot Weiss’s research entailed attending dungeon play parties, workshops on SM techniques, and business meetings of the Society of Janus, one of America’s oldest BDSM organizations. She interviewed more than sixty SM practitioners, including dungeon owners, well-known prodommes (professional dominants), and community experts. Weiss vividly evokes the feel of the BDSM scene in San Francisco area in the early 2000s.At the same time, she challenges notions of SM as inherently transgressive, revealing a technique-oriented community, largely organized around classes, rules, and the acquisition of expensive sex toys. Most members of the Bay Area’s BDSM community were white, heterosexual, middle-aged, well-off, and involved in long-term relationships.Weiss analyzed SM “scenes”—sexual encounters involving roles, costumes, and props—including dramatizations of slave markets and the creation of the Abu Ghraib photographs. She contends that such performances eroticize social inequality, reproducing hierarchies based on race, ethnicity, gender, and sexuality, rather than offering a safe space, separate from real-world inequities.

50 Shades of Kink


Tristan Taormino - 2012
    Whether readers want to get up close and personal with blindfolds, crops, and paddles or are just looking for some inspiration to keep things fresh in the bedroom, 50 Shades of Kink is ideal for everyone and their lover(s). Included are techniques and creative ideas for bondage, spanking, flogging, sensation play, and rough sex; lessons on how to eroticize power, cultivate deeper connections, and incorporate kink into one's sex life; and role-playing fantasies from the popular to the taboo.

Sensuous Magic: A Guide for Adventurous Lovers


Patrick Califia-Rice - 1993
    Sensuous Magic has the answers. Writer, therapist, and sex radical Patrick Califia-Rice has updated his classic introduction to S/M and power play to embrace couples of all persuasions and at every stage of experience. Although not a comprehensive technical guide (you will need a book on rope bondage, for instance, if you want to learn appropriate knots and techniques), Califia-Rice's text offers insightful warnings, advice, and commentary, the kind of guidance you might expect from a seasoned mentor. It is especially well-suited to daring beginners, who can learn the basics on safety and communication, while being titillated by more advanced topics like whip selection and master/slave contracts. --Regina Marler

Spanked


Rachel Kramer BusselTenille Brown - 2008
    In this enticing collection, spanking enthusiast Rachel Kramer Bussel has assembled 22 tales of red-cheeked arousal. Whether being disciplined for naughtiness or simply because they crave the sting of a hand against flesh, the men and women in these stories revel in being bent over, paddled, punished, and possessed by their spankers. Those delivering the blows find extreme pleasure in pushing their bottoms' buttons, making them -- and the reader -- tremble and quiver in anticipation as they await the next smack. Featuring stories by Alison Tyler, Sage Vivant, Stan Kent, Elizabeth Coldwell, Thomas Roche, and others, this sizzling collection offers tales so breathtakingly vivid that readers might find their own cheeks sore just from reading it.