He's confronted the HOA. He's even taken on Santa himself. He doesn't usually win. These are the tales of the Dumb White Husband and they are all available here in this collected edition.This handsome volume includes:Dumb White Husband vs. the Grocery Store - John would rather sit and watch the game, but his wife needs some things at the store. Can he complete the list and get back in time to see the end of the game?Dumb White Husband vs. Halloween - Every Halloween, Chris has the scariest house on the block and gives out the best candy. But, this year, someone is showing him up and he'll stop at nothing to find out who.Dumb White Husband vs. Santa - Erik has planned the perfect Christmas for his family. The plan is foolproof, bulletproof and flame retardant. Nothing can undo the hours of planning and preparation. Nothing except maybe odd-shaped packages, ill-timed fruitcakes or an errant neighborhood Santa Claus.Dumb White Husband vs. the Tooth Fairy - Erik always has a plan and he's sure he would have figured out the whole Tooth Fairy thing eventually. But, when his three-year-old son takes a frisbee to the mouth, he's forced to speed things up. Between neighborhood kids with big mouths and unhelpful dentists he's going to need to improvise. Will he bend to the pressure of inflation? Will he get caught in the act? And, what do you do with those teeth anyway?Dumb White Husband for President (A novella) - There comes a time in every man's life when he must stand for the things he believes in. John doesn't believe in bagging his grass. So, when a new allergy-prone neighbor gets the HOA to require it, there's only one thing he can do - run for President of The Creeks of Sage Valley Phase II.John, Chris and Erik put aside most of their differences to run a campaign that they hope will see John elected as President and end the meddling of the rule-loving new kid on the block. Will they succeed? It's doubtful.

    Not thinking about what might be lurking in the shadows, he soon finds out that you are never truly alone in the woods.

    People spend their entire lives staving off the dark—but no matter the measures taken, black paths and shadowy pits lurk in the unlikeliest of places, waiting to pull the unwary into the depths of despair.These eleven tales offer a morbid sampling of the many forms and fashions of terror—from the subtle prickling of neck hairs at the kiss of a ghostly breeze to the raw-throated screams and feverish clawing of a desperate fight for survival.Witness eleven people torn from their ordinary lives and cast into twisted realities that test their sanity, faith, and very will to live…A pilot must land a crippled aircraft on an impossible runway…A doctor feels far too much sympathy for his deformed patients…A schoolgirl’s secret contract could cost her mother’s soul…A woman whose pack-rat obsessions hide the obscene…For these and seven others, the darkness comes from within and without, subtle, deadly…and relentless.

    Brown. Brown is the winner of the Texas Book of The Year Prize, 2013. The New York Times calls his work a rekindling of the faith in the shocking, weird and beautiful power of words. Brown finally sold the ship, The Sea Section, upon which he lived for years in the Long Beach harbor, after which he took to hunting for a city that was affordable and had a bustling writer s community. He landed in Austin, Texas and when the progress of that town got to be intense, he moved to the nearby countryside in Elgin, Texas, and from that pastoral setting came unfurling this new collection of his most personal work to date. Brown has been known as one of the most touring, well travelled living poets in America. He has based his whole writing career on changing peoples minds about poetry and he feels a quality, unforgettable live experience can achieve that. Brown told himself he needed a 10-year hiatus from writing poetry when he felt the well of creativity had dried up. 2 years ago, he wrote a one-hour long poetic play called Strange Light, commissioned by The Noord Nederlands Dans Group in Holland. The piece was performed by 14 dancers and accompanied by a live orchestra using music composed by fellow Americans, Emily Wells and Timmy Straw. While he was working on a new libretto for Wayne State University in Detroit, he was set up in a seemingly pastoral country setting, where, as Brown says, an incredible war broke out inside and out, such bright, massive storms, snakes, guns, howling wind, hard sun: all kinds of poems gushed forth. I gave in to the process and my best work to date was born, this will be my 5th book. Our Poison Horse touches on more autobiography than the romantic and fantastical that was so present in his past work. In Derrick Brown s words: I found a poetry in the real events that shaped or broke me. Every morning, I would quiet down, stare out into the field where we were watching our neighbors horse, a horse that was poisoned with pesticide by some local boys, a horse with massive scars all down its body from it s skin peeling from the poison sprayed upon it maliciously by some bastard kids. I watched the horse heal and finally come to me, and trust me and eat carrots. Something about that horse, Lacey, about it not trusting me and then warming up pulled something out of me that I didn t know I was ready for. There is a theme that in beautiful places, you will"

    Don't open the door. Jake Austin finds himself standing in the middle of a dirt road, looking at an old farmhouse with no memory of how he got there. It isn’t the first time he’s been somewhere and not remember how—but it is the first time he’s woken up alone. Valley Draper has lived in the farmhouse for as long as she can remember. It might be haunted, but nothing comes without a price. When the handsome if not confused Jake comes in like he owns the place, Valley decides quickly that he needs a rude awakening. With a storm coming closer and time ticking away, can Jake find a way back home? Or are he and Valley stuck in a place that is much more than either of them bargained for?

    He expected a lot of shouting, a lot of tears, but in the end, he hoped to have a stronger foundation upon which they could start rebuilding what they had once had.What he wasn't expecting was the home invasion……and the hell that awaited them beneath the rented cabin.

    It will then be about them only. It will be all about the one they loved like thunder, about the one they struggled hard to keep, about the one who had left them in the middle of their 'forever', about their world shattering into pieces, about them gluing together every piece, and about them falling in love one more time.And if you still think it is about you and me, you haven't loved someone like thunder, yet.

    At early stage he was unaware that he was in love with Siyaa but when their school ended and both of their paths were separated, he went into deep depression. As time passes Ayyan tries many times to get Siyaa back in his life, But what's going on in Siyaa's mind?

    He was so impressed with the entries that he recommended they be published together in one book, which Cemetery Dance Publications and Hodder & Stoughton are pleased to report has become a reality. The six stories are: WILD SWIMMING by Elodie Harper EAU-DE-ERIC by Manuela Saragosa THE SPOTS by Paul Bassett Davies THE UNPICKING by Michael Button LA MORT DE L'AMANT by Stuart Johnstone THE BEAR TRAP by Neil Hudson Reader beware: the stories will make you think twice before cuddling up to your old soft toy, dipping your toe into the water or counting the spots on a leopard…

    It didn't give you the date and it didn't give you specifics. It just spat out a sliver of paper upon which were printed, in careful block letters, the words DROWNED or CANCER or OLD AGE or CHOKED ON A HANDFUL OF POPCORN. It let people know how they were going to die." Machine of Death tells thirty-four different stories about people who know how they will die. Prepare to have your tears jerked, your spine tingled, your funny bone tickled, your mind blown, your pulse quickened, or your heart warmed. Or better yet, simply prepare to be surprised. Because even when people do have perfect knowledge of the future, there's no telling exactly how things will turn out. Featuring stories by: * Randall Munroe* Ben "Yahtzee" Croshaw* Tom Francis* Camille Alexa* Erin McKean* James L. Sutter* Douglas J. Lane* and many others.Featuring illustrations by: * Kate Beaton* Kazu Kibuishi* Aaron Diaz* Jeffrey Brown* Scott C.* Roger Langridge* Karl Kerschl* Cameron Stewart* and many others

    A sleepwalker is stalked by a sinister spirit in the shadow world between dreams and reality. And in a town ravaged by a savage beast, a desperate man will do anything to protect his loved one.Scare Street is proud to present the best in bone-chilling supernatural horror. This volume contains three spine-tingling tales for your reading pleasure. But first, lock the doors, close the windows, and be sure to turn on the lights.Safe and sound, you begin to read. But wait… something scratches on your bedroom door. And you realize all the locks in the world can’t protect you. Because the thing you fear most is already inside.The lights go out, the door creaks open. And the real nightmare begins…

    All things unknown and unknowable are coming to light... Strange creatures wander the dark canopies of Germany's Black Forest. A young boy harbors something both dark and divine within him. A man learns to control his dreams, only to find an ancient evil imprisoned within them. Something lurks in the shadows of a woman's house, and it wants her baby. All of these things and more in this riveting new collection of 18 terrifying cosmic and paranormal tales. Get it now and discover the terrors that lurk within.

    Andrew and James are looking forward to meeting their favorite author, but when a homeless woman, who claims to be the author’s “biggest fan,” begins to stalk the two friends, they have to wonder if this creepy old woman is who she appears to be, and why the sound of bells follows her wherever she goes.

    A simple touch sending currents of electricity flowing through a body. The feeling of coming home. Friends become lovers. Strangers become soulmates. The chemistry ignited when two people are falling in love is undeniable. Over the course of five short stories, follow these couples on journeys of passion and discover what happens when they decide to let sparks fly…

     A detective has the chance to solve cases that have baffled her colleagues for decades. But only if she can work out who he is, before he gets to her. Because - in a story where not everything is what it seems - not even murder is black and white. Killing Kind is a tense novella with a twist that will stay with you. From UK and US bestselling author Gregg Dunnett.