Though the characters may not be human, the situations in these stories bear an uncanny resemblance to the insanity of everyday life. In "The Toad, the Turtle, and the Duck," three strangers commiserate about animal bureaucracy while waiting in a complaint line. In "Hello Kitty," a cynical feline struggles to sit through his prison-mandated AA meetings. In "The Squirrel and the Chipmunk," a pair of star-crossed lovers is separated by prejudiced family members.With original illustrations by Ian Falconer, author of the bestselling Olivia series of children's books, these stories are David Sedaris at his most observant, poignant, and surprising.

    In his latest New York Times bestseller, Hiaasen introduces impassioned, possibly bipolar, self-proclaimed queen of lost causes Honey Santana, who schemes to help rid the world of irresponsibility, indifference, and dinnertime sales calls.

    She represents everything he's so artfully avoided. Happy in her home life, a divorced mother of two, Billie is the epitome of stability. They have nothing in common.To his horror, Nick is fascinated-- and irresistibly attracted. When Billie generously offers to share her home with Nick's crazy cousin Deedee for a while, Nick finds himself visiting-- often. And while each is slowly seduced by the other's charms, and both are wildly encouraged by devious Deedee, Billie and Nick find out that what they have in common is most important of all. But neither one knows that danger is lurking where they least expect it and a killer is closing in on them.

    And they all want to own me. The workplace is for working, right? But in the interview I notice the head bartender checking me out. And the owner. And the chef. There's no way they're all into me. NO WAY. But Kellan, Joshua, and Austin are all interested. They each made it more than clear. In the supply closet, the bathroom, the kitchen. It might be wrong, but I refuse to give up one of them - any of them. The lusty desire is mutual, and honestly.... I'm happy to be served. Serve Me is a super steamy MFMM romance. There are MF and MFMM scenes in this book. It has a HEA and NO Cliffhanger. There are a few bonus books for your reading pleasure. Enjoy!

     They didn't expect actual mermaids.  They certainly didn't expect those mermaids to have teeth. This is the story of the Atargatis, lost at sea with all hands.  Some have called it a hoax; others have called it a maritime tragedy.  Whatever the truth may be, it will only be found below the bathypelagic zone in the Mariana Trench…and the depths are very good at keeping secrets.

    The coat. It was elegant. It was beautiful. It was so close that he could have reached out and touched it.And it was unquestionably his.

    Storms loves eliminating jerks and pests. His drug-addled partner Coleman loves cartoons. Hot stripper Sharon Rhodes loves cocaine, especially when purchased with rich dead men's money.On the other hand, there's Sean and David, who love fishing and are kind to animals -- and who are about to cross paths with a suitcase filled with $5 million in stolen insurance money. Serge wants the suitcase. Sharon wants the suitcase. Coleman wants more drugs . . . and the suitcase. In the meantime, there's murder by gun, Space Shuttle, Barbie doll, and Levi's 501s.In other words, welcome to Tim Dorsey's Florida -- where nobody gets out unscathed and untanned!

    His fleeting fame as the drummer for a one-hit wonder rock band is nearly a decade behind him. His ex-wife is about to marry a terrific guy. And his Princeton-bound teenage daughter Casey has just confided in him that she’s pregnant—because Silver is the one she cares least about letting down.So when Silver learns that he requires emergency life-saving heart surgery, he makes the radical decision to refuse the operation, choosing instead to spend what time he has left to repair his relationship with Casey, become a better man, and live in the moment—even if that moment isn’t going to last very long. As his exasperated family looks on, Silver grapples with the ultimate question of whether or not his own life is worth saving.

    But no one knows about the early life of the Son of God, the missing years—except Biff, the Messiah's best bud, who has been resurrected to tell the story in the divinely hilarious yet heartfelt work "reminiscent of Vonnegut and Douglas Adams" (Philadelphia Inquirer).Verily, the story Biff has to tell is a miraculous one, filled with remarkable journeys, magic, healings, kung fu, corpse reanimations, demons, and hot babes. Even the considerable wiles and devotion of the Savior's pal may not be enough to divert Joshua from his tragic destiny. But there's no one who loves Josh more—except maybe "Maggie," Mary of Magdala—and Biff isn't about to let his extraordinary pal suffer and ascend without a fight.

    But Frampton and Carly are highly advanced (if bumbling) extraterrestrials. And boy, do they have news. The entire cosmos, they tell him, has been hopelessly hooked on humanity’s music ever since “Year Zero” (1977 to us), when American pop songs first reached alien ears. This addiction has driven a vast intergalactic society to commit the biggest copyright violation since the Big Bang. The resulting fines and penalties have bankrupted the whole universe. We humans suddenly own everything—and the aliens are not amused. Nick now has forty-eight hours to save humanity, while hopefully wowing the hot girl who lives down the hall from him.

    soil can only be stopped by…The Midnight WatchIn the dead of night, a faceless enemy hacks into the Smithsonian Institution’s network of servers, but it is only the first strike masking a larger attack. To rescue a biologist trapped in the National Museum of Natural History and to discover the true intent behind an assault that grows bolder and bloodier by the minute, Sigma Force must unleash its most headstrong operative—Joe Kowalski—to do what he does best: lay waste to anything between him and his goal. From a daring rescue to a cross-city chase like no other, Kowalski will discover the shocking truth hidden in the most unexpected of places: the heart of the National Zoo.Included with this short story is a sneak peek at The Bone Labyrinth, where events that unfold here explode into one of Sigma Force’s greatest adventures of all time.

     But my plane was grounded, and this guy...he looked like he could take me places. He had gorgeous grey eyes, a tongue that cracked like a whip and a body stacked with purpose. One sleepless night should have been enough. But he won't leave my mind. After everything I've been through, that's the surest sign I need to walk away. Problem is, he's not just some businessman. He's rich. The sort of rich that makes the Kennedys look middle-class. And he's not done with me. A sexy, wealthy playboy trying to make you his? It's every girl's dream. And it's the last thing I want. Now someone tell my body that. DEACON: My family's been trying to cram a silver spoon in my mouth since the day I was born. I just keep spitting it out and do things my way. When business goes really well, I allow myself a treat. And this girl, she was a feast: curvy hips, tender lips, sultry brown hair. Plus, a brain backing it all up. She's the most perfect creature I've ever met. She thinks I'm gonna let her slip away after one taste? Not a chance in hell, sweetheart. Nothing's going to keep her from me. Not work, not family. Not even her. Deacon is a sexy-sweet standalone novel with a well-earned HEA. It features sizzling banter, steamy sexual situations and intense drama. Mature audiences only! Please note, this title was previously published under a different name.

    Cops and criminals alike tremble before him, which is just the way he likes it. He has to be harder than the hardest criminals to root the bad guys out of his city.Then his boss forces him to work with a scholar who is studying dominance in law enforcement. Alex doesn't have time to babysit a pencil-dick geek writing a useless dissertation. He's busy doing real police work. Putting bad guys behind bars.But when the pencil-dick geek turns out to be the scholarly but gorgeous and alluring Caitlin Summers, Alex realizes that the only thing he wants trembling is Caitlin . . . . naked, and beneath him.The minute Caitlin lays eyes on the smoldering, charismatic Alex, she knows that focusing on her dissertation is going to be harder than she anticipated--not to mention dangerous. Because with a track record like Alex's, the bad guys are always looking for a soft spot--and she's the perfect soft spot. When Caitlin comes under attack, Alex realizes that his most important mission is keeping Caitlin safe . . . and making her his own.**Note: A Fine Specimen was previously published by another publisher. The new edition has been lightly edited and updated.**

    Several retirees are enticed by the promise of indulgent living at a bargain price, but upon arriving, they are dismayed to find that restoration of the once sophisiticated hotel has stalled, and that such amenities as water and electricity are . . . infrequent. But what their new life lacks in luxury, they come to find, it’s plentiful in adventure, stunning beauty, and unexpected love.--penguinrandomhouse.com

    But at thirty-five, she traded in her badge for the stability of marriage and motherhood. Now Corie is married to the brilliant and remarkably handsome Judge Josh Geller and is the adoptive mother of his lovely 14-year-old daughter. Between cooking meals and playing chauffeur, Corie scouts Arabic fiction for a few literary agencies and, on Wednesdays, has lunch with her fellow Shorehaven freelancers at a so-so French restaurant. Life is, as they say, fine.But at her weekly lunches, Corie senses that something's off. Pete Delaney, a milquetoast package designer, always shows up early, sits in the same spot (often with a different phone in hand), and keeps one eye on the Jeep he parks in the lot across the street. Corie intuitively feels that Pete is hiding something--and as someone who is accustomed to keeping her FBI past from her new neighbors, she should know. But does Pete really have a shady alternate life, or is Corie just imagining things, desperate to add some spark to her humdrum suburban existence? She decides that the only way to find out is to dust off her FBI toolkit and take a deep dive into Pete Delaney's affairs.Always sassy, smart, and wickedly witty, Susan Isaacs is at her formidable best in a novel that is both bitingly wry and ominously thrilling.