Book picks similar to
The Maze Bummer: A Parody of The Maze Runner by Steve Lookner
humor
maze-runner
not-in-library
young-adult
Sorry I Missed You
Suzy Krause - 2020
Mackenzie’s sister, Sunna’s best friend, and Maude’s fiancé—all gone with no explanation.So when a mangled, near-indecipherable letter arrives in their shared mailbox—hinting at long-awaited answers—each tenant assumes it’s for her. The mismatched trio decides to stake out the coffee shop named in the letter—the only clue they have—and in the process, a bizarre kinship forms. But the more they learn about each other, the more questions (and suspicions) they begin to have. All the while, creepy sounds and strange happenings around the property suggest that the ghosts from their pasts might not be all that’s haunting them…Will any of the housemates find the closure they are looking for? Or are some doors meant to remain closed?Quirky, humorous, and utterly original, Sorry I Missed You is the perfect read for anyone who has ever felt haunted by their past (or by anything else).
Ink & Sigil
Kevin Hearne - 2020
He is blessed with an extraordinary white moustache, an appreciation for craft cocktails – and a most unique magical talent. He can cast spells with magically enchanted ink and he uses his gifts to protect our world from rogue minions of various pantheons, especially the Fae.But he is also cursed. Anyone who hears his voice will begin to feel an inexplicable hatred for Al, so he can only communicate through the written word or speech apps. And his apprentices keep dying in peculiar freak accidents. As his personal life crumbles around him, he devotes his life to his work, all the while trying to crack the secret of his curse.But when his latest apprentice, Gordie, turns up dead in his Glasgow flat, Al discovers evidence that Gordie was living a secret life of crime. Now Al is forced to play detective – while avoiding actual detectives who are wondering why death seems to always follow Al. Investigating his apprentice’s death will take him through Scotland’s magical underworld, and he’ll need the help of a mischievous hobgoblin if he’s to survive.
Ranger's Apprentice
Books LLC - 2010
Chapters: Ranger's Apprentice Books, Ranger's Apprentice Characters, List of Characters in Ranger's Apprentice, the Ruins of Gorlan, Oakleaf Bearers, Erak's Ransom, the Icebound Land, the Sorcerer in the North, the Kings of Clonmel, the Siege of Macindaw, the Burning Bridge, Will Treaty, Halt, Halt's Peril. Excerpt: Ranger's Apprentice is the title of a series of fantasy novels written by Australian author John Flanagan. The first book in the series, titled The Ruins of Gorlan, was released in Australia on 1 November 2004 and in the United States on 16 June 2005. So far, nine books have been released in Australia and New Zealand, with other countries including the United States and United Kingdom following behind. The series follows the adventures of Will, an orphan who is taken as an apprentice Ranger, as he strives to keep the Kingdom of Araluen safe from invaders, traitors and threats. He is joined on his adventures by his mentor Halt and his best friend Horace among others. The series has been sold to over 20 countries and has sold over 2 million copies worldwide. Will was an apprentice throughout the books The Ruins of Gorlan, The Burning Bridge, The Icebound Land, Oakleaf Bearers and Erak's Ransom. The first four books told the story of Will at his first two years as an apprentice while Erak's Ransom told about Will's final mission as an apprentice. Will grew up as as orphan in Castle Redmont by the charity of Baron Arald. The orphans there are educated and given food. When the orphans turn 15, they will become an apprentice to a craft of their choice. However, if they are not chosen, the child is sent to help grow crops. When the day comes for Will, no one is willing to accept him as an apprentice until the Ranger Halt gave the Baron Arald a p... More: http://booksllc.net/?id=5750241
Fat Vampire Value Meal
Johnny B. Truant - 2013
And when Maurice turns Reginald to save his life, it's just Reginald's own further bad luck that he wakes up to discover he's become the slowest, weakest, most out-of-shape vampire ever born, doomed to "heal" to his corpulent self for all of eternity.As Reginald struggles with the downsides of being a fat vampire -- too slow to catch people to feed on, mocked by those he tries to glamour, assaulted by his intended prey and left for undead -- he discovers in himself rare powers that few vampires have… and just in time too, because the Vampire Council might just want his head for being an inferior representative of their race. Fat Vampire is the story of an unlikely hero who, after having an imperfect eternity shoved into his grease-stained hands, must learn to turn the afterlife's lemons into tasty lemon danishes.
Just Cause
Ian Thomas Healy - 2007
Mustang Sally runs. A third-generation superhero, Sally's life changes forever when she fights and loses to the notorious villain Destroyer, who killed her father just before she was born. She dedicates herself to tracking him down so she can even the score.When all you can do is run, you'd better be fast, but can even the fastest girl in the world run quick enough to save her teammates' lives from Destroyer and his growing parahuman army?
Dark Homecoming
William Patterson - 2016
Their honeymoon was idyllic and Liz is blissfully happy—at first. But she feels increasingly uneasy in her lavish new home. Huntington House and its staff still seem to be in the thrall of David’s first wife. In fact, the housekeeper, Mrs. Hoffman, has made it clear that Liz can never measure up to the stunning, sophisticated, deceased, Dominique. Though Dominique drowned in a yachting accident, Liz still senses her spirit in the house. She hears unexplained noises…sees shadowy figures vanishing down the long corridors. The scent of Dominique’s favorite flowers fills the air. But Liz’s fears are more than insecurity. Two young women connected to Huntington House have already met terrible deaths. More will die—and soon. Because behind the house’s polished façade is an unimaginable secret and a love turned to twisted, unnatural obsession…Praise for William Patterson’s The Inn "The Conjuring meets The Shining in William Patterson's deliciously creepy thriller. Fast-paced, horror-filled, clever and impossible-to-predict, this heart-pounding tale will leave you breathless." --Kevin O’Brien, New York Times bestselling author
The Answer to Everything
Elyse Friedman - 2014
Turned out on the street by his fully employed, entirely fed up girlfriend, he goes on the hunt for cheap shared accommodation and stumbles upon the ideal set-up—a bedroom in the home of Amy, an attractive psychology student who has been abandoned by her condo-buying roommate. Not only does Amy have a surprisingly affordable penthouse apartment with rooftop patio and a fridge full of high-quality comestibles, but she also has a mysterious across-the-hall neighbour, Eldrich, who appears to be home all day, smoking weed and receiving an odd assortment of visitors. Before long, John is availing himself of Eldrich's pot, food and wine. He notices that these staples are provided gratis to Eldrich by friends and acquaintances who rely on him for spiritual guidance. That's when John, atheist and misanthrope, decides to start a New Age cult with Eldrich as guru. And so, as half art project, half money-making scheme, the Answer Institute is born. With Amy as a partner in the enterprise, the cult flourishes and grows exponentially, attracting a wide range of broken, strange and spiritually hungry individuals, including an obscenely wealthy Singaporean expat, a psilocybin-dealing hippie, a conservative mom mourning the death of her only child, and the star of a popular sci-fi TV show. Eldrich begins to embrace his role as Leader with a little too much zeal and introduces his followers to increasingly peculiar rituals. Amy becomes progressively more enamoured of the funds pouring into the coffers, and John lets sexual jealousy get the better of him. The more successful the Institute gets, the more it spirals out of control, culminating in a bizarre ayahuasca ceremony that ends in a way nobody could have expected. With humour and pathos, The Answer to Everything examines the gap between reason and faith, and the human need for connection, love and transcendence.
The Hunger Pains: A Parody
The Harvard Lampoon - 2012
When Kantkiss Neverclean replaces her sister as a contestant on the Hunger Games—the second-highest-rated reality TV show in Peaceland, behind Extreme Home Makeover—she has no idea what to expect. Having lived her entire life in the telemarketing district’s worst neighborhood, the Crack, Kantkiss feels unprepared to fight to the death while simultaneously winking and looking adorable for the cameras. But when her survival rests on choosing between the dreamy hunk from home, Carol Handsomestein, or the doughy klutz, Pita Malarkey, Kantkiss discovers that the toughest conflicts may not be found on the battlefield but in her own heart . . . which is unfortunately on a battlefield.
The Photo Traveler
Arthur J. Gonzalez - 2013
Left alone in the world after his parents died in a fire when he was four, he was placed in foster care, which for him meant ending up in an abusive home with an alcoholic adoptive father.Gavin’s only escape is in taking and creating images. His camera is his refuge from the unending torture and isolation of daily life in his “family.”Until he learns by accident that he isn’t alone in the world after all. His father’s parents are still alive and living in Washington DC.When he takes the plunge and travels 3,000 miles to find his grandparents, he learns that they—and he—are part of something much bigger, and more dangerous, than he could ever have imagined. Something that has always put his family at risk and that will now threaten his own life, while forever changing it. He learns that he is one of the last descendants of a small group of Photo Travelers—people who can travel through time and space through images. But his initial excitement turns to fear, when he soon discovers that he and his grandparents are being pursued by the fierce remnants of a radical European Photo Traveler cult, the Peace Hunters. What Gavin has, they want!His adventure will take him to past eras, like The Great Depression and the Salem Witch Trials. Gavin will have to discover who he really is and must make choices that spell the difference between life and death for himself, for the relatives he now knows and loves, and for the girl he will come to love.For Gavin Hillstone, life will never be the same.
Things Grak Hates
Peter J. Story - 2014
Lots of things. And with a peculiar intensity too.Grak’s contempt is so strong, in fact, that it often leaves his fellow tribesmen bewildered. And when attempting to describe his personality, they find themselves in need of words with greater nuance. “Neurotic” is typically used. “Sociopath” and “narcissist” are also common terms. The most popular descriptor, however, is “pathological.”Grak, on the other hand, sees his situation in a rather different light. He finds his behavior “necessary” and “selfless,” or even “benevolent” when his mood is just so. Most often, though, he simply attributes his nature to “being human.”But of all the things Grak despises, his antipathy for olives takes precedence. In his efforts to be rid of this nuisance, he gets his first taste of power and ignites a series of events with troubling consequences. Unwilling to give up his newfound influence, he sets about honing his only true talent: manipulation. But as his grip tightens, Grak’s naively selfish exterior crumbles to reveal a dark and malicious evil …In his debut work, author Peter J Story brews a robust psychological satire infused with dry humor and a pinch of emotion. Set just prior to recorded history, Things Grak Hates chronicles the life of a bizarre nomad and his descent toward evil. Along the way, this unconventional and introspective allegory explores a variety of complex issues. Among them: power, politics, religion, redemption, the dissemination of ideas, and human nature itself.
Ultimate Nyssa Glass: The Complete Series
H.L. Burke - 2016
Nyssa Glass is a reformed cat burglar turned electrician's apprentice, settled into a life repairing videophones and radio-sets. However, when her past comes calling, she finds herself on the run for a murder she did not commit. As her quiet life goes up in sparks, she must face killer robots, menacing villains, and sarcastic computers in a race for survival. Nyssa has her hands full just trying to stay one step ahead of the police, but she still has time for adventure, humor, and even a taste of romance.
The Book of Moon
George Crowder - 2016
Not that Moon's death is imminent--far from it--but his thoughts have turned to gallows humor, as his world disintegrates along with his parents' marriage. His older brother skateboards through life with ease, but Moon is deeply troubled.Just as he is solving for romantic unknowns with a gorgeous older girl, Moon must contend with his dad's sudden absence, his mom-gone-wild's sexcapades, and his best friends' curious penchant for self-destruction. Not to mention his newfound role in agitating to end an African guerrilla's bloody rampage.To make sense of it all, Moon embarks on a quest to unravel the riddle of God's injustice to man.In this humorous and touching coming-of-age novel, Moon struggles to understand his parents--who they are, what brought them together, what broke them apart--and what that all means for his future.
Throne of Lies
Sara Secora - 2016
She finds herself forever torn between duty and desire—desperately craving freedom, yet bound by the burden of her bloodline. With the realm of Vataenya divided by intolerance, and stained by a veiled and violent past, none take kindly to those who are different. For Amethysta’s sake, her mother must conceal her daughter’s mystifying secret from all—including from Amethysta herself.Once driven to her wit’s end, Amethysta sets out on an unrelenting search for answers that will leave her teetering on the very edge of anguish and strife. With each harrowing turn, Amethysta encounters devastating loss, uncovers the mortifying unknown, and comes face to face with the calamitous heartache that awaits her. All the while, an enigmatic blue glow sleeps below the surface, ready to unfold a world of chaos.
Death and Mr. Right
Kendra L. Saunders - 2013
Everyone knows They don't look lightly on important items getting lost or an agent falling in love.Can the diva-like Death navigate the modern world, recover what was stolen from him (the names of the damned ooops!) and get his job back? Or will he fall in love with Lola, the pretty thief who got him into all this trouble in the first place?
Night of the Living Trekkies
Kevin David Anderson - 2010
Jim Pike, the disillusioned manager of a hotel that is hosting a Star Trek convention, finds himself leading a ragtag crew of survivors as a strange virus turns the convention-goers into zombies...