Book picks similar to
May Contain Nuts by Jonathan Meres


middle-grade
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Magic Marks the Spot


Caroline Carlson - 2013
    “My dear,” he said, “let me be clear: You are a young lady. You will not tell silly tales and you will never be a pirate.”Hilary Westfield has always dreamed of being a pirate. She can tread water for thirty-seven minutes. She can tie a knot faster than a fleet of sailors. She particularly enjoys defying authority, and she already owns a rather pointy sword. There’s only one problem: The Very Nearly Honorable League of Pirates refuses to let any girl join their ranks of scourges and scallywags.Girls belong at Miss Pimm’s Finishing School for Delicate Ladies, learning to waltz, faint, and cursty. But Hilary and her dearest friend, the gargoyle, have no use for such frivolous lessons—they are pirates! (Or very nearly.)To escape from a life of petticoats and politeness, Hilary answers a curious advertisement for a pirate crew and suddenly finds herself swept up in a seafaring adventure that may or may not involve a map without an X, a magical treasure that likely doesn’t exist, a rogue governess who insists on propriety, a crew of misfit scallywags, and the most treacherous—and unexpected—villain on the High Seas.Will Hilary find the treasure in time? Will she become a true pirate after all? And what will become of the gargoyle?

E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial in His Adventure on Earth


William Kotzwinkle - 1982
    First you find a friend...Filmaker STEVEN SPIELBERG and novelist WILLIAM KOTZWINKLE together create a magical story about two unforgettable friends: a gentle being from another world who is stranded on Earth, hunted, afraid and alone....and a ten-year-old boy who finds him and takes him home.--from back cover of paperback version

The Book of Time


Guillaume Prévost - 2006
    They look as dusty as everything else in the Faulkner Antiquarian Bookstore, where 14-year-old Sam Faulkner seeks his father, who's been missing for days. But when Sam slips the coin into the statue, he's swept back in time -- to Scotland in 800 A.D. -- where he must find both the statue and another coin in order to return to the present. It's the first step in an adventure that will take him to ancient Egypt, World War I, even Dracula's castle -- and a mystery that will end only when Sam saves his father, or loses him in time . . .

Madame Doubtfire


Anne Fine - 1987
    Their parents' divorce has not made family life any easier in either home. The children bounce to and from their volatile mother, Miranda, and their out-of-work actor father, Daniel. Then Miranda advertises for a cleaning lady who will look after and mind the children after work - and Daniel gets the job, disguised as Madame Doubtfire. This bittersweet, touching and extremely funny book inspired the highly successful film "Mrs Doubtfire", starring Robin Williams

The Dark Hills Divide


Patrick Carman - 2003
    Alexa is curious about what lies beyond the massive ramparts that surround the city and the walled roads that link Bridewell to nearby towns; soon after town leader Thomas Warvold passes away, Alexa finds herself outside the walls, acquires a stone with remarkable powers, and discovers that she's meant to stop a potential war from occurring.[Author notes in a video blog at http://www.patrickcarman.com/wp-conte..., about the series reading order that the books in the original trilogy (The Dark Divide #1, Beyond The Valley of Thorns #2 and The Tenth City #3) should be read in that order and that Stargazer #4 read after the original trilogy. Otherwise is up to reader preference. Into The Mist, is a chronological prequel to the trilogy, but the story is told by characters on the boat where The Tenth City left off; it can be read before or after the original trilogy.]

Beauty and the Beast: Lost in a Book


Jennifer Donnelly - 2017
    When she comes upon Nevermore, an enchanted book unlike anything else she has seen in the castle, Belle finds herself pulled into its pages and transported to a world of glamour and intrigue. The adventures Belle has always imagined, the dreams she was forced to give up when she became a prisoner, seem within reach again.The charming and mysterious characters Belle meets within the pages of Nevermore offer her glamorous conversation, a life of dazzling Parisian luxury, and even a reunion she never thought possible. Here Belle can have everything she has ever wished for. But what about her friends in the Beast’s castle? Can Belle trust her new companions inside the pages of Nevermore? Is Nevermore’s world even real? Belle must uncover the truth about the book, before she loses herself in it forever.

Mistakes Were Made


Stephan Pastis - 2013
    Created by New York Times best-selling cartoonist Stephan Pastis.Take eleven-year-old Timmy Failure — the clueless, comically self-confident CEO of the best detective agency in town, perhaps even the nation. Add his impressively lazy business partner, a very large polar bear named Total. Throw in the Failuremobile — Timmy’s mom’s Segway — and what you have is Total Failure, Inc., a global enterprise destined to make Timmy so rich his mother won’t have to stress out about the bills anymore. Of course, Timmy’s plan does not include the four-foot-tall female whose name shall not be uttered. And it doesn’t include Rollo Tookus, who is so obsessed with getting into "Stanfurd" that he can’t carry out a no-brainer spy mission. From the offbeat creator of Pearls Before Swine comes an endearingly bumbling hero in a caper whose peerless hilarity is accompanied by a whodunit twist. With perfectly paced visual humor, Stephan Pastis gets you snorting with laughter, then slyly carries the joke a beat further — or sweetens it with an unexpected poignant moment — making this a comics-inspired story (the first in a new series) that truly stands apart from the pack.

Lights, Camera, Middle School!


Jennifer L. Holm - 2017
    You can never be sure who s a friend and who's an enemy, and the halls are filled with mean-girl zombies. Instead of brains, the zombies hunger for stuff the perfect wedge sandals or the right shade of sparkly lip gloss and they expect everyone to be just like them. But Babymouse doesn't want to fit in she wants to stand out! So she joins the film club to write and direct a sweeping cinematic epic. Will making the film of her dreams turn into a nightmare?

Beowulf: A New Telling


Robert Nye - 1968
    When he leaves, a trail of blood is all that remains. He is a monster,  Grendel, and all who know of him live in fear. Hrothgar, the king of the Danes, knows something  must be done to stop Grendel. But who will guard the great hall he has built, where so many men have lost their lives to the monster while keeping watch?Only one man dares to stand up to  Grendel's fury --Beowulf.

Zombiekins


Kevin Bolger - 2010
    He's cowardly, shy, and spends most of his time hiding from the school bully, Knuckles Bruzkowski! Then Stanley stumbles upon the yard sale of his neighbor, Old Lady Imavitch, where he buys a mysterious stuffed animal. But this isn't any old toy . . . it's Zombiekins! He's a little bit teddy, a little bit bunny, and a whole lotta ZOMBIE! And he's coming this way! Stump! Scri-i-i-i-itch . . .Stump! Scri-i-i-i-itch . . .Stanley brings Zombiekins to school and unleashes the worst zombie plague in fourth grade history! Can Stanley find the courage to save the day before his teachers notice the class is full of zombies? Or will he soon join the ranks of the snuggily UNDEAD?

The Education of Little Tree


Forrest Carter - 1976
    Little Tree as his grandparents call him is shown how to hunt and survive in the mountains, to respect nature in the Cherokee Way, taking only what is needed, leaving the rest for nature to run its course. Little Tree also learns the often callous ways of white businessmen and tax collectors, and how Granpa, in hilarious vignettes, scares them away from his illegal attempts to enter the cash economy. Granma teaches Little Tree the joys of reading and education. But when Little Tree is taken away by whites for schooling, we learn of the cruelty meted out to Indian children in an attempt to assimilate them and of Little Tree's perception of the Anglo world and how it differs from the Cherokee Way. A classic of its era, and an enduring book for all ages, The Education of Little Tree has now been redesigned for this twenty-fifth anniversary edition.

Switched


Sienna Mercer - 2007
    Then she meets Ivy Vega. At first, Ivy, pale and dressed all in black, looks like Olivia's opposite. Then the girls look beyond the glittery pink blush and thick black eyeliner to discover they're identical--identical twins!Olivia and Ivy are brimming with plans to switch places and pull every twin trick in the book. But Olivia soon discovers that she and Ivy aren't exactly the same. Ivy's a vampire. And she's not the only one in town.

Everything I Need To Know I Learned From a Little Golden Book


Diane Muldrow - 2013
    In this age of debt, depression, and diabetes, could we adults use a refresher course in the gentle lessons from these adorable books, she wondered—a "Little Golden guide to life"? Yes, we could! Muldrow's humorous yet practical tips for getting the most out of life ("Don't forget to enjoy your wedding!" "Be a hugger." "Sweatpants are bad for morale."), drawn from more than 60 stories, are paired with delightful images from these best-loved children's books of all time—among them The Poky Little Puppy, Pantaloon, Mister Dog, Nurse Nancy, We Help Mommy, Five Pennies to Spend, and The Little Red Hen. The Golden greats of children's illustration are represented here as well: Richard Scarry, Garth Williams, Eloise Wilkin, J. P. Miller, and Mary Blair, among many others. Sure to bring memories and a smile, this book is a perfect gift for baby boomers, recent grads, lovers of children's literature—or anyone who cherishes the sturdy little books with the shiny cardboard covers and gold foil spines!

The Littlest Bigfoot


Jennifer Weiner - 2016
    Ignored by her family and shipped off to her eighth boarding school, Alice would like a friend. And when she rescues Millie Maximus from drowning in a lake one day, she finds one.But Millie is a Bigfoot, part of a clan who dwells deep in the woods. Most Bigfoots believe that people—No-Furs, as they call them—are dangerous, yet Millie is fascinated with the No-Fur world. She is convinced that humans will appreciate all the things about her that her Bigfoot tribe does not: her fearless nature, her lovely singing voice, and her desire to be a star.Alice swears to protect Millie’s secret. But a league of Bigfoot hunters is on their trail, led by a lonely kid named Jeremy. And in order to survive, Alice and Millie have to put their trust in each other—and have faith in themselves—above all else.

The School for Good and Evil


Soman Chainani - 2013
    Some years it was two boys taken, some years two girls, sometimes one of each. But if at first the choices seemed random, soon the pattern became clear. One was always beautiful and good, the child every parent wanted as their own. The other was homely and odd, an outcast from birth. An opposing pair, plucked from youth and spirited away.This year, best friends Sophie and Agatha are about to discover where all the lost children go: the fabled School for Good & Evil, where ordinary boys and girls are trained to be fairy tale heroes and villains. As the most beautiful girl in Gavaldon, Sophie has dreamed of being kidnapped into an enchanted world her whole life. With her pink dresses, glass slippers, and devotion to good deeds, she knows she’ll earn top marks at the School for Good and graduate a storybook princess. Meanwhile Agatha, with her shapeless black frocks, wicked pet cat, and dislike of nearly everyone, seems a natural fit for the School for Evil.But when the two girls are swept into the Endless Woods, they find their fortunes reversed—Sophie’s dumped in the School for Evil to take Uglification, Death Curses, and Henchmen Training, while Agatha finds herself in the School For Good, thrust amongst handsome princes and fair maidens for classes in Princess Etiquette and Animal Communication.. But what if the mistake is actually the first clue to discovering who Sophie and Agatha really are…?