The 100 Best Yo Mama Jokes.

    Enjoy these hilarious stories about stupid criminals, their hilarious attempts at crime, and bizarre mistakes they made that prevented them from getting away with their crimes.

    Big trouble. And she was going to clean it off if it was the last thing she'd do... which it was looking like it very well might be. Daisy had a simple rule for space travel. Don't blow up. So far she'd been managing to abide by that, but something was very much not right. With the powerful AI supercomputer guiding the craft beginning to show some disconcerting quirks of its own, and its unsettling cyborg assistant nosing into her affairs, Daisy’s unease was rapidly growing, as was her bigotry toward artificially intelligent beings. Add to the mix a crew of mechanically-enhanced humans, any one of whom she suspected might not be what they seemed, and Daisy found herself with a sense of pending dread tickling the periphery of her mind. Something was very much not right––she could feel it in her bones. The tricky part now was going to be overcoming her biases and figuring out what the threat was, before it could manifest from a mere sinking feeling in her gut into a potentially deadly reality. Only things were far different and far worse than she could ever have imagined, forcing her to repeatedly adjust and overcome a reality that turned out to be far from what it had originally seemed. The complete series set of all five of the Clockwork Chimera books: 1. Daisy's Run 2. Pushing Daisy 3. Daisy's Gambit 4. Chasing Daisy 5. Daisy's War A space opera adventure featuring damaged spaceships, rogue artificial intelligence, homicidal cyborgs, mechanically-enhanced humans, genetic engineering, nanotech, and, of course, bloodthirsty aliens.

    Rapid expansion into habitable worlds brings immense prosperity and a new age of exploration unlike any humanity has seen. WAR Conflicts over control of the colonial worlds spawn a massive, generation-long war among humans. Under a shaky armistice, humanity has just begun to crawl out of the shadows of destruction, but suspicion and bitter hostility run deep. INVASION On a rocky, desolate planet, a small band of gold prospectors find themselves making a discovery they never expected—valuable and powerful relics of the galaxy's deep past. The prospectors also discover a hostile alien species, ruthless beings who do not tolerate humans and wipe them out on sight. Humanity's first contact with intelligent aliens becomes a war for survival. The invasion has begun...but the beginning of the invasion is also the beginning of the resistance. "Resistance is a terrific space opera adventure. It combines mystery, heart-pounding action, and a good dose of humor. It's Aliens meets Tremors. I can't wait to read the sequel." -Daniel Arenson, USA Today bestselling author of the Earthrise series

    A freelance reporter struggling to get into the 'big time'...A rookie officer starting her career in public safety...A cargo ship captain trying to outlive a terminal illness that has no cure...A bounty hunter returning a long-hunted fugitive to Earth...A terrible plague that threatens to destroy the human race...The 25th century is not starting off very well."Fall of the Core" is a 150,000 word stand-alone novel in the Frontiers Saga Universe."

    He is mistaken.Abducted by aliens and whisked across the galaxy, Cal is thrown into a team of misfits and criminals, and sent on a top secret mission for the President of Space. And that's when everything starts to go very, very wrong...This box set collects the first three bestselling adventures of Cal Carver and the crew of the dread ship Shatner, by multi-award-winning author, Barry J. Hutchison: Space Team Space Team: The Wrath of Vajazzle Space Team: The Search for Splurt

    

    Along the way, readers join the author in discovering: • The scary side of fishing; • Why it’s wrong when board games become blood sports; • The unexpected connection between cooking classes and true romance; • How the author's cat convinced him to take up yoga (and why that was a terrible idea); • Golfing for the ball challenged; • The thrill of jumping out of an airplane without risking your life; • The eternal appeal of Elly May Clampett; and, • How to do nothing without feeling guilty about it.

    

     Goth Sullus and his empire have fallen. With the Legion and the rest of the galaxy watching from the still-smoldering galactic core, Carter, a former legionnaire turned private contractor, and Jack Bowie, a Navy spy with nowhere left to turn, sign up to work for an enterprising private contractor looking to make a statement on the planet Kublar. Plans are in motion dating back to the Savage Wars, and as the galaxy rushes to fill in the vacuum created by the fall of the Imperial Republic, the bodies are hitting the floor. But every plan has a reckoning… Takeover is the thrilling aftermath of the final, desperate execution of Article Nineteen and the looming rebirth of the Legion and the galaxy itself as Galaxy’s Edge: Season Two begins! Available now in Audio book format performed by Ray Porter!

     “The Log of the Gray Wolf" is a self-published science fiction novel. Readers have found it to be a fast-paced and packed with action. This is a story crafted around a young man becoming a man, an officer, and a hero. It is a story set against incredible odds, where this underdog crew of gray wolves and young pups must somehow escape their world, steal a damaged ship and fight their way through enemy forces while raining pain down on the enemies of mankind. The adventure begins in a future time when Earth has colonized new worlds and has also found new enemies. The Karduans are a race of blue-skinned humanoids ruled by a matriarchal society. The Blues, as they are nicknamed - are aggressive and militant with their female rulers possessing telepathy to control their subservient male population. Most human worlds are ruled by the United Confederation of Earth, which had evolved from the old United Nations format after the Apocalypse War. At this time period, Earth has been at war for several years. Our hero, Mike Collins former midshipmen, now an Ensign, finds himself trapped on a breakaway world that has made a deal with the Karduans. This leads him and his classmates along with a group of retired veterans to plan an escape to rejoin Earth's forces. Join the fight! Note from Author: This book has been revised and re-edited since first self-published. Ratings and comments from early readers about editing are from before latest edits. Please look at reader ratings talking about content as editing has been pretty much fixed. I hope you enjoy it.

    

    Edited to improve the timelines with new scenes.We all dream of discovering our superpower. For seventeen-year-old Jennifer Gallagher, that superpower is an IQ of 206. Captivated with the StarCruiser Brilliant movie franchise since she was five, she has a chance to intern with the Hollywood studio that produces the series.She knows that StarCruiser Brilliant is the key to finding out what happened to her father, but discovers that Brilliant will take her to the stars on her search.The first book of the StarCruiser Brilliant series will thrill and excite you as you get to watch Jennifer grow from a precocious teen to a powerful, professional woman and discover her true superpower.If you have read Brilliant before and would like the new edition, send me an e-mail at rilakin - at - gmail - dot - com and answer the following question: In the Virtual Copa, what was the name of the dancer Tayla replaced when she danced with Gene Kelly?Specify e-book, mobi, or pdf and I will send you the updated version and thanks for reading.

    Of her worst day... Monday morning, about ten... A Human female's life will be saved because an ancient alien can't stand dickheads. Harry (the Human female, her dad had a family issue) hoped a new job as detective marshal on the planet Smuds, would bring adventure and weird aliens. It did. Chunglie is weirder than most, and proud of it. When bodies are found on a spaceship, Chunglie comes to realise his new friend is the only one who can solve the mystery and find the killer. But the killer has worked that out too, and it's up to Chunglie to keep Harry alive. You will enjoy this story, because everyone likes to see the dauntless alien sidekick come through for the win… yes?

    Chaos rules the final days of the Forerunner empire. The Flood—a horrifying, shape-changing, and unstoppable parasite—has arrived in force, aided by unexpected allies, and internal strife has desperately weakened Forerunner defenses. Facing the imminent collapse of their civilization, the Forerunners known as the Ur-Didact and the Librarian reveal what they know about the relationship between the long-vanished race of the Precursors and the Flood. While the Precursors created many technological species, including those of the Forerunners and humanity itself, the roots of the Flood may be found in an act of enormous barbarity, carried out beyond our galaxy ten million years before. Because of that savagery, a greater evil looms. Only the Ur-Didact and the Librarian—husband and wife pushed into desperate conflict—hold the keys to a solution. As they face the consequences of a mythic tragedy, one of them must now commit the greatest atrocity of all time—a shocking act designed to prevent an insane abomination from dominating the entire galaxy…