This ebook documents the most egregious – and most hilarious – offenders from the moment Superman flew onto the Atari 2600 in 1978 all the way through 1992, when Konami's classic X-Men sucked in quarter after quarter in arcades. NEARLY 80 SUPERHERO GAMES Some you've played. Some you haven't. And quite a few you never even knew existed in the first place. Some high-/lowlights: Purple Dark Knight vs. Green Joker in Batman: The Video Game (NES) Proven instances of "slapping a license" on an already-developed game Games that stripped Wolverine and He-Man of their most iconic weaponry A questionable transportation method for the Man of Steel in Superman (NES) A Transformers game from the creator of Pitfall! The strangest comic book license ever to hit the Sega Genesis The most unnecessary tie-in to a superhero animated series of all time The Danger Mouse Trilogy That one lonely Thundercats game ANSWERS TO BURNING QUESTIONS YOU DIDN'T EVEN KNOW TO ASK Who is "the Princess Peach of superhero games"? Who was the first Marvel character to be featured in three games? And what's the single gaming appearance he's had since 1985? Which super-character is most consistently misrepresented in games? What common superhero gaming feature was pioneered by LJN's otherwise absolutely horrible X-Men NES game? Which hero's primary gaming nemesis is someone he still has yet to even meet in the comics? What do an NES game and a major restaurant chain agree is Wolverine's favorite food? Why is Carnage getting naked on my SNES?! GAMING PLATFORMS YOU LOVED...OR DIDN'T KNOW EXISTED Atari 2600 | Intellivision | Commodore 64 | Nintendo Entertainment System | Game Boy | Super NES | Sega Master System | Genesis | Game Gear | Lynx | ZX Spectrum | MSX | PC-DOS | MORE! YOUR FAVORITE HEROES (AND SOME YOU'VE NEVER HEARD OF) From Marvel! Spider-Man | Wolverine and the X-Men | Hulk | Captain America, Iron Man, Hawkeye, Vision, and a bunch of other Avengers | Punisher | Human Torch and the Thing from the Fantastic Four | Silver Surfer | Howard the Duck From DC! Superman | Batman | Flash | Swamp Thing From Other Comic Publishers! Conan | Flash Gordon | Judge Dredd | Ex-Mutants From Toy Lines and Cartoons! Transformers | Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles | He-Man and the Masters of the Universe | Bartman and Radioactive Man from The Simpsons | G.I.

    He is frustrated, confused, baffled and, quite frequently, very funny. He is also a GP. These are his confessions.A woman troubled by pornographic dreams about Tom Jones. An 80-year-old man who can't remember why he's come to see the doctor. A woman with a common cold demanding (but not receiving) antibiotics. A man with a sore knee. A young woman who has been trying to conceive for a while but now finds herself pregnant and isn't sure she wants to go through with it. A 7-year-old boy with 'tummy aches' that don't really exist.These are his patients.Confessions of a GP is a witty insight into the life of a family doctor. Funny and moving in equal measure it will change the way you look at your GP next time you pop in with the sniffles.

    Foster carer Mia Marconi was thrilled when he first arrived – a boy the same age as her son.It can be so bewildering for foster children when they arrive. The older ones are usually withdrawn and sullen. The younger ones will be screaming, spitting at you, making themselves sick and throwing themselves on the floor.For Mia, it’s normally her boisterous, happy children who provide the comfort at the beginning, because why should they trust another adult. Children always feel safe and secure when there are other children about. Mia believes it’s through making relationships with other children that they begin to trust adults again. But little did she know that six-year-old Brody was actually taking his anger and frustration out on her son. She quickly begins to realise the heavy price her family has had to pay. (Amazon.com)

    And The Grand Tour has seen some of them. That’s why few people are better placed to lead you around this vast planet of ours than Jeremy Clarkson, Richard Hammond and James May. As long as you don’t mind getting hot and lost. Welcome, everyone, to The Grand Tour Guide to The World.In this indispensable guide, you will find an abundance of information, most of which is probably wrong and possibly dangerous. As well as occasionally accurate guides to the places visited on the show, you’ll find exclusive interviews with the presenters and discover their favourite locations for car-based cocking about.As well as being a factually dubious encyclopaedia, The Grand Tour Guide to the World is also a travel companion for those of you who have been inspired by the Grand Tour circus. You’ll find tips on how to sing like a native in the Bahamas, how to speak Welsh (wrongly), and how to navigate the magic roundabout in Swindon. On top of all this, we reveal the world’s fastest cop cars and the greatest car makers. And there’s a picture of James May in an anorak.

    • Exhausting—when you realize you’ll most likely never sleep again--like EVER. • Explosive—OMG these kids spew from both ends! And that’s just the beginning. Whitney shares the ridiculous highs and excruciating lows of her catapult into motherhood. Enjoy the ride as this new mom vows to give up profanity while falling in love with… you guessed it, Costco. Be careful, because if you’re anything like Whitney, you may just pee a little. Motherhood Martyrdom & Costco Runs takes the reader on a roller coaster of emotions as Whitney plummets into postpartum depression, desperately tries to get her kids to stop yodeling in public restrooms, and comes to terms with the fact she’ll never quite be queen of her own kingdom. Get ready to laugh, cry, cheer, and pat yourself on the back for the sake of mommies everywhere. And while you’re at it, stop by Costco for a case of toilet paper and a Very Berry Sundae. You won’t regret it!

    After being fired from his job as the clandestine stooge on hit TV show Ghostbusters UK, Elliott returns home to find his girlfriend missing. To make matters worse, Hapkido Valentine, the legendary 1980s wrestler, has returned from the dead and taken up residency in Elliott’s flat. Despite a voracious appetite for sausage sandwiches, Hapkido is convinced he has finally become the mystical Japanese warrior he once portrayed in the ring.Together they must undertake a dangerous journey to find out why the Universe created this most unlikely of partnerships. All that stands in their way is a medallion wearing TV psychic, a train-spotting assassin and the murderous intentions of the local over 75’s women’s group. If Elliott thought the day started badly, things are about to get a whole lot worse.

    Now in this beautiful keepsake edition, Bombeck's moving words are paired with original art that bring to life the warm portrait of motherhood contained within. An angel marvels at the detail and overtime that the good Lord is putting into his creation of mothers. Despite the six pairs of hands and the three pairs of eyes that every mother needs, the angel thinks she has discovered a flaw:"There's a leak," she pronounced. "I told you that you were trying to put too much into this model.""It's not a leak," said the Lord. "It's a tear.""What's it for?""It's for joy, sadness, disappointment, pain, loneliness and pride.""You are a genius," said the angel.The Lord looked somber, "I didn't put it there." Every mother will treasure this moving tribute, penned by America's most beloved expert on motherhood.

    TRULY TASTELESS JOKES took America by storm and made it laugh at itself. It's all in here, disgusting, repulsive, cruel, and just plain tasteless jokes and stories that will make you smile, laugh, or groan--and love every minute of it.

    He has been a busy man. Yet, for the last two years, he has also managed to squeeze in a weekly column for The Times. Without fail, he sat down every week and wracked his brain to think of something to write 900 words about. Dispatches From the Sofa is the brilliant result. Alighting on such random topics as the potential demise of Margaret Thatcher, the love-hate relationship with your football club, Mike Read's musical of Oscar Wilde, fat pop stars, Serbian breakfast banter, the pleasures of air-guitar, the banking crisis and the evil phenomenon of Jedward, this is a thought-provoking, wide-reaching, hilarious and self-deprecating collection - which also includes the first two chapters from his unpublished novel - from one of our funniest, quickest and most beloved comedians.

    Jackasses are those who make our lives needlessly harder. They drive too slowly in the fast lane and too quickly in the slow lane, reply all, heat up fish in the microwave at work and share way too much information about their cleanse on Facebook. They live in our homes, work in our offices and shop at our stores. Jackasses are among us, and we have some bad news for you: if you can't spot the Jackass at the (enter literally any place on the planet), then the Jackass is you. After a lifetime of research, Scott and Alison Stratten offer the definitive guide to surviving the Jackassery in your life and making the world a better place, one set of noise-cancelling headphones at a time.

    Their achievements, rich culture and craftsmanship contributed greatly to our world today, and their explorations helped make up the boundaries of nations. The Vikings: Raiders, Explorers, and Seafaring Warriors by author Lance Hightower will give you a glimpse of the battles that raged for more than 300 years, sparked by the cultural and religious differences that were the trigger for warring with the Franks, England and Ireland, and for trade and exploration into the Muslim empire, the Byzantine Empire, as far as Russia, Spain and North America.They came from Sweden, Norway and Denmark, not as one army, but as separate tribes who assaulted their way through Christendom as retaliation for the destruction of their holy icon. They came from the sea in a way that ingeniously allowed them to go where no conventional ship dared, and they were able to navigate waters without benefit of the sun to guide them. They used boats that made ship-building history – light, fast, and equally efficient in shallow rivers and mighty oceans.They terrorized, traded, bartered, took slaves, colonized, fought and died all in the name of Odin, god of the battle-slain. Perhaps in the end, they fought more for territory and riches than principle, but the history of the Vikings will always remain as one of the most enthralling of all Ages, where honor was crucial, death on the battlefield was preferred to idleness, and the stormy pantheon of their gods still held the greatest influence in their lives.The brilliant sagas come to life with snippets of modern translations, told like tales of old should be told, with dread, heroics and excitement. Lance Hightower combines his own expertise with the latest archeological findings and information given to us from ancient text to present a first-rate portrayal of the Vikings in an easy-to-read format that is a refreshing change from the usual dry delivery of history.

    You might have caught the bug after experiencing that adrenaline rush of completing your first 5k; it might be a desire to finally cross something off your bucket list; or, perhaps it was a bit of an absentminded afterthought while watching TV, crisps in hand, and a niggling voice saying ‘maybe I could do that’ – it was for Vassos, at least. However far along you are in your journey, How to Run A Marathon shows us that absolutely anyone can take those first steps to defeating the distance. In fact, you’ll probably end up enjoying it a lot more than you think.Including inspiring interviews with runners from all walks of life, delightful tales of remarkable marathons all over the world, crucial training and nutrition tips and so much more, Vassos shares all the lessons he’s learnt — from start line to finisher’s medal.Funny, candid and motivating, this book will not only help you succeed in your marathon quest but empower you to complete the distance any way you want. Whether that’s achieving a particular time or simply finishing in one piece, How to Run a Marathon will guide you through.

    However, when James Aden takes up the position of Deputy Agent he does not realise the full extent of what the job entails.He finds himself spending his days negotiating with royalty, farmers, and even wildlife, as well as the imperious Lady Leghorn. In order to survive, James must come to terms with his role quickly, and not let himself get too distracted by Sophie, the pre-college assistant.

    There, any romantic visions they'd had of restoring a villa or stamping their entwined feet in vats of Chianti grapes disappeared faster than the chief witness in a Cosa Nostra trial. Shamus and Gill's tiny apartment in Catania was located in a grim neighborhood opposite a triple-X cinema and a shop selling coffins, nearby Mount Etna erupted soon after their arrival, a mystery ailment left Shamus in a neck brace, they crashed a Vespa, and they had regular dealings with at least one Mafioso. This, then, is an Italian sea change with grit. But it's also a story of optimism, endurance, and acceptance; an exploration of the minutiae of Sicilian culture, history, food, and religion; and an example of how to find beauty—and humor—in the most unexpected of places.

    Especially if you live abroad, where your countrymen aren’t exactly famous for, well, blending in. As his beloved homeland goes Brexit bananas, bestselling humourist Paul Hawkins takes on Britishness - how it looks from the outside, how to be British abroad and what you only learn about home once you leave it. In this self-deprecating (and only mildly treacherous) handbook, he reveals the awkward secrets, cultural blind-spots and private oddness of the people he once shared an island with. (Revenge is a dish best served politely, after all…) Part memoir, part cheat-sheet for decoding a nation of well-meaning misfits, The Bloody British is full of hilarious insights about Britishness gleaned (often begrudgingly) from the author’s own time as another country’s foreigner. Featuring invaluable advice for all Brits, expats, brexpats and visitors to the UK alike, including: · The Brit Abroad Language-Speaking Plan · How to be Rude, Politely (the secret world of passive-aggression) · How to be Mean, Nicely (the unwritten rules of successful banter) · … plus an illustrated Integration Guide for British Refugees in Europe (just in case) For all fans of Very British Problems, Douglas Adams and Bill Bryson, it’s the perfect gift for the socially awkward oddball in your life (especially if that socially awkward oddball is you.) Are you ready to meet The Bloody British?