I call your doctors office and am put on hold for 5 minutes, then informed that your prescription was phoned in to my competitor on the other side of town. Phoning the competitor, I am immediately put on hold for 5 minutes before speaking to a clerk, who puts me back on hold to wait for the pharmacist. Your prescription is then transferred to me, and now I have to get the 2 phone calls that have been put on hold while this was being done. Now I return to the counter to ask if we've ever filled prescriptions for you before. For some reason, you think that "for you" means "for your cousin" and you answer my question with a "yes", whereupon I go the computer and see you are not on file. The phone rings..." That's part of the reason why your prescription takes so long to fill, and after almost 20 years of this, a question I was never quite able to answer loomed larger and larger each day: "Why did I get into this profession?" Cranky customers whose only questions seem to involve their insurance co-pays. Pointless paperwork. People begging for early narcotic refills. Staff cuts. That was my workday. The struggle to get people the medicine and information they needed seemed almost futile at times. Then one day I got the answer. It hit me like a ton of bricks while driving home one spring evening along the California coast. I was born again, but it had nothing to do with Jesus. It did have a lot to do with a little plastic motorcycle. And I did become the pharmacist who saved Christmas. I absolutely know now why I became a pharmacist. I still don't know why your co-pay is so high.

    Having longed for children since before she can remember, she was suddenly faced with an array of unfamiliar, unexpected and sometimes downright embarrassing emotional and physical reactions. And when Poppy (and a year later Daisy) was born she had to learn a whole new set of skills.From trying to conceive and a first positive pregnancy test to Poppy's first birthday, Minus Nine To One takes you through the worries, surprises, excitement, miracles and sheer bloody hard work that Jools - and all new mums in their own different ways - have to cope with along the way. As Jools writes, 'This certainly isn't meant to be read as a guidebook, or a medical reference book - it is simply my story and I hope that you can relate to it in some way (and maybe even relax with it in the bath!).'Down to earth, personal and very, very funny, this is the book no aspiring mother will want to be without.

    Kliban’s Cat, All I Need to Know I Learned from My Cat, and Bad Cat, comes a new book that answers the question all cat lovers ask: How do I make my cat like me?97 Ways to Make a Cat Like You is the perfect interactive guide to these mysterious, fickle, seemingly aloof—yet really, just particular—pets. Paired with a full-color photograph of friendly, extroverted, happy cats (in case you’ve forgotten what a cat looks like when he “likes” you), the 97 inspired, occasionally silly but always behaviorally-based tips and tricks prove that when a cat is treated right, he or she will respond in kind. Within reason. There’s the “Eye on the Ball”—record a tennis match or a Ping-Pong game on TV to play back for your cat when he needs a bit of exercise. “Cat Burrito”—wrap your cat in a towel, burrito-style, which is particularly good for anxious pets or trips to the vet. The “Boing, Boing!”—wind pipe cleaners around a pencil in a spiral shape to create springs. Carefully slide off the pencil so the spirals go “boing” when pressed. The classic “Tickle, Tickle”—tickle Kitty under her chin and softly say “gitchy, gitchy, gitchy” in your highest-pitched voice. And for the cat owner willing to go the distance, the “There’s No Business Like Show Business”—practice your best Ethel Merman by belting out favorite show tunes for your cat. Kitty won’t care if you’re off-key and she’ll enjoy the stimulation.

    Rhoda Morgenstern) takes on those phony "fabulous at 50" books written by women whose skin is free of laugh lines and who wouldn't know a cellulite pocket if it bit them on the backside. With her trademark shoot-from-the-hip, call-'em-like-she-sees-'em style, she helps women celebrate, with humor and grace, what it means to be middle aged.Harper's essays explore the treacherous terrain women must travel -- from the tyrannies of fashion to the unmentionables of menopause. She tackles the most perplexing questions of the day: If you wear a size zero, do you exist? Would menopause be revered if it happened to men? Do calories count if you eat standing up? Are dressing rooms fitted with fun house mirrors? Today I Am a Ma'am is the perfect antidote to the youth obsession of our culture, offered by America's most reliable girlfriend. It is Humor Replacement Therapy for midlife women, a book you can pick up when ever you need a laugh or a reminder that midriff drift is not the end of the world.

    Seemingly, a manual for the hedonist about town, the Kama Sutra reveals another tale—written in blood—of broken hearts, lyrical violence, ageless love, and unbridled lust! Set in 273 AD, in a land fraught with war and unrest, Kama is the story of a catastrophic day in a writer-artist’s life that sets him off on a journey unto himself, beyond the boundaries of love, family and betrayal. This fast-paced story of tragedy and triumph beguiles and captivates as it flits seamlessly between an agonising past, an erotic present and a cataclysmic future."

    Peter and Natasha's journey starts in drizzle and wind as they scale Croagh Patrick, Ireland's Holy Mountain in Mayo, before setting off immediately afterwards for the Pyrenees in France. There, they start walking the Camino, the Way of St James, to Santiago de Compostela. It is a grueling trek over three mountain ranges; through fields and valleys, villages, towns and cities, to the lush countryside and forests of Galicia, and eventually to Finisterre, the pagan end of the earth. Along the way, they meet a motley collection of other pilgrims with whom they laugh, cry and above all have fun amid moments of high drama, exhilaration and sometimes exhaustion. They run with the bulls and parade in a fiesta; they pray with the faithful, and explore the Camino's rich Christian and pagan history; they stay in its sometimes Spartan pilgrim hostels and appreciate the richness of living simply. "A lovely book for those who have done the Camino, or like me, are thinking of doing it."--The Dubliner. "This is a travel book, certainly, but it is much much, more than that. It's about family and friendship and camaraderie, and it is, in the end, a wonderfully warm story about the bond between a loving adventurous father and his daughter ready to embrace the world."-The Irish Mail on Sunday.

    I Did. Now What?! Now it's time for her to write about the real love of her life: Wendell. Her dog.*Do you talk about your dog non-stop? *Do you suspect your dog is a genius? *Do you name each of your dog's toys?*Does your dog get more heavy petting than your spouse? *Do all holidays revolve around your dog? If any of these scenarios sound familiar, you probably have a healthy admiration for your dog. But if all of the scenarios in What Wendell Wants sound familiar, well, it's obvious that your appreciation of your pooch has truly crossed the line into true love--dysfunctional, sure, but who cares?! Jenny Lee knows this obsession inside and out, and her advice is not to fight it: there's simply no cure. Instead, she offers hysterical accounts of her own experiences--from fretting over her dog's haircut to getting his portrait painted a la Picasso to trying desperately to impress the Bed & Biscuit dog kennel--to give all kindred dog-loving spirits out there some consolation that they're not alone.From the Hardcover edition.

    And he shares them with brutal honesty in this very book, along with plenty of hilarious (and sometimes painful) anecdotes about his career.This is not a book that will tell you how to format a manuscript or write a compelling query letter. It's a book about how to cope with rejection and bad reviews. Book signings where nobody shows up. Helplessly watching your peers go on to greater success than you. He's been through all of that and so much more, and in these pages you'll have a bunch of laughs as you commiserate and figure out how to get through it all.

    (Continued from National Geographic's "Battlefield Afghanistan")This is undoubtedly the most honest and raw account of an Officer's thoughts and actions during combat that has ever been written. After publishing this book, Donny O'Malley's job options are now reduced to low level sales and day labor construction. It is still unclear how he ever made it out of the Marines without court martial.Senior officer's will slam him, military historians will be shocked, and all civilians will be 100% certain he's psychotic.Fortunately, the book is written for the opposite of those mentioned above. It’s written for Enlisted guys.Officers who are brave enough to read will either cry themselves to sleep, jerk themselves off to Donny's picture, or will ask their buddies to write them up for an award with V for having the moral courage to finish the book."My moto boner is still raging strong and I read this book three days ago. I'm certain that my dick is going to explode, and I really don't care, because this book was that fucking good."-Marine I served with."858-555-5555- Hey bro that's my wife's phone number. You can fuck her whenever you want, just wear a condom and try not to blow anywhere near the face. I understand mistakes happen, but do your best. Thanks for writing the book, I really needed that." -Marine I never served with"Just wanted to say that your book is cracking me up. I think the people on the subway think I'm nuts because I can't stop uncontrollably laughing. I think I crack up because I know your jabroni ass and know that the shit you write about that is going on in your head is true, no bullshit. You are completely fucked up, in the good way. If people were to question if you were making this up I could say that it's no bullshit because I spent enough time with you to know that you beat off 10 times a day. I slept above you on ship and heard you beating dick all the time. Fuck it, what man doesn't beat off constantly?It's raw and honest. Like you said, as professional as all of us try to be (officers especially) deep down we are fuckin animals, neanderthals who just love pussy and talking about sucking dick, in a gay way, and when we get the chance, killing bad guys. Anyone who denies that, other than maybe the Col, is a fuckin liar.......PS-your description of Major Dyce is spot on... fuckin moron. Someone should have blew him up." -Lieutenant I served with.A message from the author-This book is a reach-around to all enlisted, and a FUCK YOU to every Officer who has ever written a politically correct, full-of-shit, “I’m a great leader,” book about combat. Every single one of those fucking jerkoffs wrote a book for civilians that not a single enlisted guy ever gave two-shits about. The truth is that Marines love killing more than they love pussy; they fantasize about mowing down insurgents with a 240 on post while 70 virgins take turns blowing them.This is who we are, and I’m sick and tired of nerdy ass book writers hiding our reality from the public.

    What time is the 3:00 parade? Why does a child need to be 40 inches tall to ride a roller coaster? What happens when the president of France gets lost inside Pirates of the Caribbean? A former employee, or "cast member", at Walt Disney World's Magic Kingdom answers these and other questions while sharing humorous stories about working inside the world's most popular theme park."Stories from a Theme Park Insider" takes you inside the park's famous tunnels and backstage for a look at how theme parks really work, and the funny moments and embarrassments that can happen when your work is someone else's vacation.

    A box set consisting of three Bill Bryson books, 'Notes from a Small Island', 'Notes from a Big Country' and 'A Walk in the Woods'.

    Inside, you'll find hundreds of jokes that are guaranteed to stir up a room full of smiles, including knock-knocks, witty puns, and one-liners. Complete with hilarious quotes from celebrities like Jon Stewart, Lewis Black, and Jerry Seinfeld, everyone will revel in each gut-busting moment.So whether you're looking to add a few jokes to your repertoire, impress your buds, or improve your banter, this sidesplitting book arms you with the perfect joke for any occasion!

    There are treatments available that can halt, and in some cases, even reverse the aging process.But how do you know what treatments are best for you? Which of the hippest, hottest, and newest are fabulously effective and which are nothing more than new-age snake oil? Let us be your guides. Dr. and Mrs. Guinea Pig Present The Only Guide You'll Ever Need to the Best Anti-Aging Treatments will outline all the best techniques and treatments, from the so-new-you-haven t-heard-of-them-yet to the tried-and-true; from the perfectly legal to the are-you-trying-to-get-me-arrested; from the simple to the outrageous; and from the cheapest drugstore creams to the most complicated surgeries. We will provide you with the information and research you need to create your own, unique anti-aging plan to look and feel your best forever!"

    Help, Thanks, Wow ...in 30 minutes is the concise guide to quickly understanding the three simple prayers outlined in Anne Lamott's best-selling book, Help, Thanks, Wow: The Three Essential Prayers. Understand the thought-provoking ideas behind Help, Thanks, Wow:* Learn what it means to pray, and the life-opening power of prayer, independent of your faith or lack thereof.* Inspirational stories convey Lamott's personal insight and exploration of faith.* Discover how the three essential prayers help us endure difficult times and continue to move ahead. In Help, Thanks, Wow, best-selling author Anne Lamott demystifies prayer, declaring that there are no rules--a higher power can be called anything, and people can believe in any religion they'd like (or none at all) and still pray.Prayer can take countless forms, but Lamott believes that it all boils down to three essential prayers: Help, Thanks, and Wow. Help is an admission of powerlessness and a plea for assistance; Thanks is a cry of gratitude; and Wow is the experience of awe.A thought-provoking spirituality guide for people of all faiths and creeds, Help, Thanks, Wow examines the importance of the three prayers vital to enduring hardship and experiencing a transformative sense of gratitude and wonder in the world.Help, Thanks, Wow ...in 30 minutesDesigned for those whose desire to enrich their faith exceeds the time they have available, Help, Thanks, Wow ...in 30 minutes enable readers to rapidly understand the essential ideas behind critically acclaimed books. With a condensed format and chapter-by-chapter synopsis that highlights key insights, this summary helps readers easily devote time to growing their faith.