And after he handed in a scorching book report of the classic novel, Old Shep, My Pal, detention is just what he’s been handed. He is sure he’s done nothing wrong: he hated every minute of that book, especially when the dog dies in the end! Why do dogs always die at the end? Wallace refuses to do a rewrite of his report, so his English teacher, who happens to be directing the school play of Old Shep, My Pal, forces him go to the rehearsals to teach him a lesson on why the story is the way it is. Surrounded by theater kids who are apprehensive of him, Wallace sets out to prove himself. But not by changing his mind. Instead, he changes the play into a rock-and-roll rendition, complete with Rollerblades and a moped!

    Polonius-on-the-Fjord is the annual Tasting of the Sacred Bear Liver. Each citizen over twelve must eat one bite of liver to prevent the recurrence of the Great Hibernation, when the town founder's fell asleep for months.This year is Jean Huddy's first time to taste the liver. It doesn't go well. A few hours later, all the adults fall asleep. And no one can wake them.The kids are left to run things, and they're having a blast. That is, until the town bullies take over the mayor's office and the police force.Jean suspects that this "hibernation" was actually engineered by someone in town. She starts to investigate, and inspires other kids to join her in a secret plan to save St. Polonius.

    Just as cats go miaow and cows go moo, The Truth Pixie can only say things that are true.

    Its affectionate, wacky, and wryly realistic portrayal of an American family’s typical Christmas joys and travails in small-town Depression-era Indiana has entered our imagination and our hearts with a force equal to It’s a Wonderful Life and Miracle on 34th Street.This edition of A Christmas Story gathers together in one hilarious volume the gems of autobiographical humor that Jean Shepherd drew upon to create this enduring film. Here is young Ralphie Parker’s shocking discovery that his decoder ring is really a device to promote Ovaltine; his mother and father’s pitched battle over the fate of a lascivious leg lamp; the unleashed and unnerving savagery of Ralphie’s duel in the show with the odious bullies Scut Farkas and Grover Dill; and, most crucially, Ralphie’s unstoppable campaign to get Santa—or anyone else—to give him a Red Ryder carbine action 200-shot range model air rifle. Who cares that the whole adult world is telling him, “You’ll shoot your eye out, kid”?The pieces that comprise A Christmas Story, previously published in the larger collections In God We Trust, All Others Pay Cash and Wanda Hickey’s Night of Golden Memories, coalesce in a magical fashion to become an irresistible piece of Americana, quite the equal of the film in its ability to warm the heart and tickle the funny bone.From the Hardcover edition.

    Profane, loving, and deeply cathartic, You Have to Fucking Eat breaks the code of child-rearing silence, giving moms and dads new, old, grand-, and expectant a much-needed chance to laugh about a universal problem.A perfect gift book like the smash hit Go the Fuck to Sleep (over 1.5 million copies sold worldwide!), You Have to Fucking Eat perfectly captures Adam Mansbach's trademark humor, which is simultaneously affectionate and radically honest. You probably shouldn't read it to your kids.Adam Mansbach is the author of the #1 international bestseller Go the Fuck to Sleep, as well as the novels Rage Is Back, Angry Black White Boy, The Dead Run, and The End of the Jews, winner of the California Book Award. He has written for the New Yorker, the New York Times, Esquire, the Believer, and National Public Radio’s All Things Considered. His daughter Vivien is six.Owen Brozman has illustrated for National Geographic, Time Out New York, Scholastic, Ninja Tune, Definitive Jux, and numerous other clients. He and Mansbach recently collaborated on the acclaimed graphic novel Nature of the Beast, and his work has been recognized by the Society of Illustrators of Los Angeles, Creative Quarterly, 3x3 magazine, and many more. He lives in Brooklyn, New York, with his wife and daughter, whose favorite food is bananas.

    Join Adrienne, her guardian dragon, Sparky, and their plucky friend Bedelia as they begin their own quest in this one of a kind, action packed, all-ages adventure!Graphic Novel. Collects issues 1-4 of Princeless.

    Alice always thought fairy tales had happy endings. That--along with everything else--changed the day she met her first fairyWhen Alice's father goes down in a shipwreck, she is sent to live with her uncle Geryon--an uncle she's never heard of and knows nothing about. He lives in an enormous manor with a massive library that is off-limits to Alice. But then she meets a talking cat. And even for a rule-follower, when a talking cat sneaks you into a forbidden library and introduces you to an arrogant boy who dares you to open a book, it's hard to resist. Especially if you're a reader to begin with. Soon Alice finds herself INSIDE the book, and the only way out is to defeat the creature imprisoned within.It seems her uncle is more than he says he is. But then so is Alice.

    Can Hiccup do it without being torn limb from limb?Join his adventures and misadventures as he finds a new way to train dragons--and becomes a hero. This action-packed, hilarious, and perfectly illustrated novel is a modern classic beloved by millions across the globe.

    Every morning, employees arrive to find broken Kjerring bookshelves, shattered Glans water goblets, and smashed Liripip wardrobes. Sales are down, security cameras reveal nothing, and store managers are panicking. To unravel the mystery, three employees volunteer to work a nine-hour dusk-till-dawn shift. In the dead of the night, they’ll patrol the empty showroom floor, investigate strange sights and sounds, and encounter horrors that defy the imagination. A traditional haunted house story in a thoroughly contemporary setting, Horrorstör is designed to retain its luster and natural appearance for a lifetime of use. Pleasingly proportioned with generous French flaps and a softcover binding, Horrorstör delivers the psychological terror you need in the elegant package you deserve.Designed by Andie Reid, cover photography by Christine Ferrara.

    But will the trip – and a life-threatening adventure – fix their relationship… or break it for good?A beautiful story of family, forgiveness, and finding out who you are, from the author of the highly-acclaimed Ella on the Outside.

     Kell discovers that his neighbor, Bree Hendricks, turns 9-years-old next month and she wants a party with an alien theme. That should be simple as flying from star to star. But things aren’t that easy: Earthling’s ideas about aliens are totally wrong. Even worse, Principal Lynx is a UFO-Chaser and suspects aliens around every corner. Will the Aliens totally blow the Aliens Party? Will Principal Lynx capture Kell and his family and them over to the government? Will an alien boy find school friends? Kell must find a way to fit into the school life and make friends. In art class, music class and home room, he must learn the ways of Earthlings. His next door neighbor, Bree, makes it easier and helps the family find a way to make a living. A new spin on books for readers in grades two, three, four, and five Easy Chapter Book series Chapter Book Series for boys Chapter Book Series for Girls Chapter Book Series for ages 7-10 Humor for Kids – “A Funny Book” The alien family, the Smiths, understand little of Earth’s culture, which results in funny situations. For one thing, Bixsters are hatched, not born. When Kell finds out that humans cook with eggs, he is horrified. And there are those bugs that bite or sting. Kell can’t get away from them. Discover what other readers already know “Amusing, accessible, engaging” – Publisher’s Weekly Scroll up and get your copy of Kell, the Alien at the everyday low price! Read more of the ALIENS INC. CHAPTER BOOK SERIES BOOK 1: Kell, the Alien BOOK 2: Kell and the Horse Apple Parade BOOK 3: Kell and the Giants BOOK 4: Kell and the Detectives Art Teachers: Every volume stars with a scene in the art classroom, creating something fun. Family story: When th Smith family is shipwrecked on Earth, they must learn to depend on each other.

    Daisy and Hazel invite you to discover their untold stories . . .Daisy Wells and Hazel Wong are famous for the murder cases they have solved - but there are many other mysteries in the pages of Hazel's casebook.From the macabre Case of the Deepdean Vampire, to the baffling Case of the Blue Violet, and their very first case of all: the Case of Lavinia's Missing Tie.Just like Daisy and Hazel's cases, there's more to this book than meets the eye, including: Brilliant mini-mysteries, including two brand-new and never seen before storiesDaisy and Hazel's own tips, tricks and facts.This is the perfect book for Agatha Christies In Waiting and fans of the award-winning, bestselling Murder Most Unladylike series. Cream Buns and Crime Note: Cream Buns and Crime is a short story collection containing; #0.5, The Case of Lavinia's Missing Tie, #3.5 The Case of the Blue Violet and #4.5 The Case of the Deepdean Vampire.

    "All the world, in ink and blood, vellum and parchment, leather and hide. It is the world, and it is yours to save or lose." An unusual murder brings together three strangers, John, Jack, and Charles, on a rainy night in London during the first World War. An eccentric little man called Bert tells them that they are now the caretakers of the Imaginarium Geographica -- an atlas of all the lands that have ever existed in myth and legend, fable and fairy tale. These lands, Bert claims, can be traveled to in his ship the Indigo Dragon, one of only seven vessels that is able to cross the Frontier between worlds into the Archipelago of Dreams.Pursued by strange and terrifying creatures, the companions flee London aboard the Dragonship. Traveling to the very realm of the imagination itself, they must learn to overcome their fears and trust in one another if they are to defeat the dark forces that threaten the destiny of two worlds.An extraordinary journey of myth, magic, and mystery, Here, There Be Dragons introduces James A. Owen as a formidable new talent.

    Brought up by her aunt's family in New Jersey, book-and-music-loving Olivia feels out of place in their life of high fashion and fancy cars. But she never could have imagined how out of place she really was until Mia Thermopolis, Princess of Genovia, pops into her school and announces that Olivia is her long-lost sister. Olivia is a princess. A dream come true, right? But princesses have problems too.In FROM THE NOTEBOOKS OF A MIDDLE SCHOOL PRINCESS a new middle grade series, readers will see Genovia, this time through the illustrated diaries of a spunky new heroine, 12 year old Olivia Grace, who happens to be the long lost half-sister of Princess Mia Thermopolis.The original Princess Diaries series sold over 5 million copies in the US (15 million worldwide), spent 82 weeks on the USA Today bestsellers list, and inspired two beloved films.

    Armstrong. But then, the most unexpected thing happens—the school principal, Mrs. Sniggles, suggests Max run for class president.Max isn’t the only kid on the ballot, however. His archenemy, Abby Purcell, is also up for election—and she’s out to defeat him at all costs. To win, Max is going to need the 24/7 help of his best friend, Hugo, and he’s going to have to run the campaign of a lifetime.Max may not be the smartest or fastest kid, or the handsomest, but he just might be the funniest kid you’ll ever meet—and it’s this talent that could turn him from underdog to top dog. Max for President!Matt Stanton brings his veteran children’s book chops to this hilarious new series, perfect for early middle grade readers looking for side-splitting laughs!