Diary of an Expectant Father


Pete Sortwell - 2013
    That changes when he meets Alison on a work night out. Unfortunately for Graham, however, things change so drastically that within a month of dating Alison he gets the news that he’s about to become a father for the first time.'The Diary of an Expectant Father' charts the months leading up to what should be the happiest day of a young couple's life, but with a relationship so new and a career so bad, can Graham keep everything together for the sake of his unborn child?With all the pitfalls and worries of an expectant father charted, this book is for all those who have been through pregnancy or just want to know how a man deals with all these things internally.'Expectant Father' is the first in a series of diaries by Graham Peterson, who sometimes thinks he’s writing to an Alien Warlord from the future. The next in the series, ‘The Diary of a Hapless Father: Months 1-3’, charts those first three terrifying months of parenthood.

Stephen Fry Does "The Knowledge"


Stephen Fry - 2011
    The Google generation thinks it doesn’t need to carry much of it around in its head any more. Much has already been written about the internet changing the way we think and learn. But is knowledge less valuable than it used to be?This absorbing programme explores the concept of ‘knowledge’, drawing on a variety of diverse sources: quiz games, psychology, education, news, trivia shows, satellite navigation and comedy. Featuring cab drivers, philosophers, memory champions and members of the Brains Trust, it looks at topics including cultural relativism, language learning and prodigious feats of memory. Plus, it attempts to answer such questions as: what constitutes useful knowledge in an era when we can find anything very quickly?; why has 'useless knowledge' gained in currency?; and, if Typhoo put the tea in Britain, should we take the piss out of epistemology?’Packed with interviews, debates and a feast of archive clips from the past three decades, this is an enlightening and entertaining overview of the world of knowledge, both general and specific.Presenting an archive-rich investigation into the changing value of knowledge from an original angle—the London black cabbie's famed �Knowledge” test—starring Britain's favorite examiner of language and culture, Stephen Fry.

My Story: Schapelle Corby: Fully Revised and Updated Since Her Release and Return Home


Schapelle Corby - 2019
    She had been Hotel K's most famous inmate.Schapelle was a 27-year-old beauty-school student when, in 2004, Bali customs officers found 4.2 kilograms of marijuana in her boogie-board bag. She was convicted of a crime she still vehemently denies committing.She spent ten years in Hotel K, where she survived unimaginable horrors, corrupt guards, degrading conditions, and abuse at the hands of other prisoners, but also, amazingly, found the love of her life - a love that still burns strong.In this revised and updated edition of My Story, first published in 2006, Schapelle describes her descent into madness, and finding her way back, the chaos of her release, the trials of surviving outside on parole and, eventually, her dramatic return to Australia, all the while hounded mercilessly by the media.This is the first time since 2006 that Schapelle has spoken, driven by a determination to show she has emerged, scarred, but with her dignity, humour and courage intact.Written with bestselling author Kathryn Bonella, this is a deeply unsettling but utterly compelling tale of what should have been a holiday in paradise but instead turned into 13 years of living hell. You won't be able to put it down.

What Would Susie Say?: Bullsh*t Wisdom About Love, Life and Comedy


Susie Essman - 2009
    Emerging as one of the most successful performers in her field, Essman goes behind the scenes of a life in comedy with her funny cohorts, including Joy Behar, Rodney Dangerfield, and, of course, Jeff Garlin and Larry David, while also providing sidesplittingly funny wisdom on a range of topics that she's highly unqualified to expound upon, including men, sports, hypochondria, and stepparenthood.WHAT WOULD SUSIE SAY ABOUT...MARRIAGE?"It took me a long time to find the man I was willing to commit myself to. Even the word commit is troublesome. One is committed to a mental institution."MEN WITH DOGS?"As a dog lover, I've researched many different breeds and I've begun to realize that you can tell a lot about a person by what breed of dog they choose to associate with. A bit self-conscious about your cellulite? A guy with a shar-pei is for you. They're hard to find, but cheaper than lipo."THE BEAUTY OF MENOPAUSE?"I guess I just have to accept the fact that I'm going to end up a bald, fat, sweaty, irritable woman with a dry vagina and a full beard who never sleeps and has memory loss so I won't even be able to remember how hot I used to look!"STEPPARENTHOOD?"My mother used to tell me 'you can't buy your kids' love.' Bullshit. You can, and it's exponential. They're like Russian mail-order brides -- the more you spend, the more they love you." WHAT WOULD SUSIE SAY? is Essman's irreverent, refreshingly candid, and hilarious retort to the dubious facts of life that we all face.

United States of Apocalypse 2: Razed Country (United States of Apocalypse, #2)


Mark Tufo - 2021
    World War II is a full-blown nightmare for the survivors of the initial attack. American forces have been pushed to the brink and have been forced toward the center of the country in a frenzied bid to regroup and strike out, fending off the aggressors before it is too late and she falls completely under enemy control. Darlene Bobich and her group struggle to elude capture from the Sawyer clan, hell-bent on enslaving everyone in sight. Meanwhile, Mike, BT and what remains of the National Guard forces are caught up in a multi-national conflict that could spell the end of the American way.Can our heroes escape and can anything be done to turn the tide of a war that looks all but lost?

It's Not Me, It's Them: Confessions of a hopeless modern romantic


Joel Dommett - 2018
    It's impossible not to be bowled over by the ending. Most definitely my favourite celebrity memoir in a long time. Brilliant.' - THE SUN**The hilarious debut from I'm A Celeb star Joel Dommett (Live at the Apollo, 8 Out of 10 Cats, Impractical Jokers), for fans of Joe Lycett, James Acaster and Sarah Millican**As a 17-year-old virgin working . . . for Virgin, Joel Dommett has grand ambitions. Firstly, he is going to swap suburbia for the bright lights of Showbiz. Secondly, he is going to find 'the one' in the first forty people he's going to sleep with.What follows is a series of disastrous romantic encounters, including carpets mistaken for toilets, futile grand gestures and the catfishing to end all catfishing.Featuring genuine teenage diary entries and told in Joel's trademark self-deprecating style, this is the brilliant first book from the UK's most exciting comedian.

Idiot


Laura Clery - 2019
    She writes songs about her anatomy, talks trash about her one-eyed rescue pug, and sexually harasses her husband, Stephen. And it pays the bills! Now, in her first-ever book, Laura recounts how she went from being a dangerously impulsive, broke, unemployable, suicidal, cocaine-addicted narcissist, crippled by fear and hopping from one toxic romance to the next…to a more-happy-than-not, somewhat rational, meditating, vegan yogi with good credit, a great marriage, a fantastic career, and four unfortunate-looking rescue animals. Still, above all, Laura remains an amazingly talented, adorable, and vulnerable, self-described…Idiot. With her signature brand of offbeat, no-holds-barred humor, Idiot introduces you to a wildly original—and undeniably relatable—new voice.Oh, the places I've peed --High school Hammer time --My summer of (possibly too much) freedom --How to ignore a hundred red flags --The Damon inside --A spoonful of sugar --Look, Mom! I'm on TV! --New beginnings (but, like, for real) --Two apartments and a home --Maggie: cat --Walking through fear

Don't Go to Jail!: Saul Goodman's Guide to Keeping the Cuffs Off


Saul Goodman - 2016
    Did you know that in New Mexico there’s a law that says “idiots” can’t vote? Or that Massachusetts still has a ban on Quakers and witches? Or that in Georgia it’s illegal to put a donkey in a bathtub?Even if you’re not bathing a donkey (and hey, if you are, no judgment from me!), you could be breaking the law right now and not even know it. That’s why you need Don't Go to Jail! You can carry the advice of a seasoned legal practitioner with you anywhere you go, helping you to stay out of the courts and in the good graces of the criminal justice system.Want to be your own attorney? Want to avoid getting hauled in on a warrant? Want to keep the cops from discovering the baggie of “your friend’s” marijuana stashed under the passenger seat of your car? This is your chance to get those tips and many more savory bits of indispensable legal advice--all for much less than my usual hourly fee.

Leave Me Alone: A memoir of me, myself and Trish


Christian Hull - 2021
    He loves being a little bit famous for his videos, but at the end of the day he's a lone wolf - one who's more interested in Caramilk on the couch than cocktails in the club. He's a strong believer in Netflix and chilling at home, alone; he's always the first to smokebomb social events, and he is in a committed relationship with his indoor plants.Christian tells his behind-the-scenes story with his signature, completely unapologetic honesty, from growing up with triplet brothers to building a career in comedy; from his fear of moths to some of his more daring Grindr sexcapades. He invites you into his personal creative universe, where wearing a wig to make random videos and screaming swearwordsat resin pendants somehow turn out to be great decisions.Leave Me Alone is a story of breaking the mould and embracing exactly who you are, even if that means telling people to leave you the f**k alone.

SAS great escapes


Damien Lewis - 2020
    No water. Out of ammo. Safety is south. But between there and here is 150 miles of barren desert – freezing at night, boiling in the day – populated solely by Ernst Rommel’s fearsome and deadly Afrika Corps.What would you do? Give up? Or get on with it? For the seven SAS supermen in Damien Lewis’s explosive new audio exclusive, the answer was simple: Escape. Evade. Survive. From the mountains of Italy, to the deserts of Africa, these heroes epitomise the bravery, esprit de corps and daring do of Britain’s finest elite fighting force. Fans of Ant Middleton’s First Man In and Ben MacIntyre’s SAS: Rogue Heroes are in for a treat, as the SAS’s master chronicler, Damien Lewis, has produced a gripping, heart-in-the-mouth, real-life thriller. A Sunday Times number one best-selling author, this fresh look at the most audacious escapes the SAS made in the Second World War is white-knuckle listening of the highest calibre. Because if you put a fence in front of these men...they’ll climb it.

The Book of the Year 2018: Your Definitive Guide to the World’s Weirdest News


James Harkin - 2018
    Every week for the past four years, Dan, James, Anna and Andy – the creators of the award-winning, chart-topping comedy podcast No Such Thing As A Fish – have wowed each other and millions of their listeners with the most astonishing trivia they have learned over the previous seven days. Now, once again, they have put down the microphones, picked up their pencils, and transformed a year’s worth of weird and wonderful happenings into one uplifting book that you won’t be able to put down.Discover how Peruvian mummies affected the World Cup, and why Love Island contestants are experts in game theory – as well as hundreds of stories that may have passed you by entirely, including the news that:· NASA sent a man with a fear of heights to the International Space Station. · An ice hotel in Canada caught fire. · Mark Zuckerberg’s private data was compromised while he was talking to Congress about compromised data.From Kim Jong Un’s personal potty to Jeremy Corbyn’s valuable vegetables, The Book of the Year 2018 is an eye-opening tour of yet another incredible year you didn’t know you’d lived through.

NPR Holiday Favorites


David Sedaris - 2008
    Like an overstuffed stocking on Christmas morning, NPR Holiday Favorites is full of unexpected pleasures and evergreen delights.• David Sedaris contributes his now classic “Santaland Diaries,” his account of his experiences playing Santa’s little helper at Macy’s in New York.• Susan Stamberg sneaks her mother-in-law’s recipe for cranberry relish onto the air—again.• Storyteller Kevin Kling finds an invitation to participate in a production of The Nutcracker too tempting to resist.• Ghanian-born commentator Meri Danquah shares her thoughts on Kwanzaa.• Cowboy poet Baxter Black describes a Christmas cookie with “the denseness of an anvil and the half-life of a radial tire.”• Robert Siegel goes in search of the correct spelling for December’s Jewish holiday.• The Thanksgiving tables are turned on unsuspecting Bostonians in “When Turkeys Attack.”And more...

Idle Thoughts of an Idle Fellow


Jerome K. Jerome - 1886
    This book wouldn't elevate a cow. I cannot conscientiously recommend it for any useful purposes whatever. All I can suggest is that when you get tired of reading 'the best hundred books, ' you may take this up for half an hour. It will be a change." (from the Preface to "Idle Thoughts of an Idle Fellow by Jerome Jerome)

An Utterly Impartial History of Britain or 2000 Years of Upper Class Idiots In Charge


John O'Farrell - 2007
    Back then 'The Origins of the Industrial Revolution' somehow seemed less compelling than the chance to test the bold claim on Timothy Johnson's 'Shatterproof' ruler. But here at last is a chance to have a good laugh and learn all that stuff you feel you really ought to know by now...In this "Horrible History for Grown Ups", you can read how Anglo-Saxon liberals struggled to be positive about immigration; 'Look I think we have to try and respect the religious customs of our new Viking friends - oi, he's nicked my bloody ox!' Discover how England's peculiar class system was established by some snobby French nobles whose posh descendants still have wine cellars and second homes in the Dordogne today. And explore the complex socio-economic reasons why Britain's kings were the first in Europe to be brought to heel; (because the Stuarts were such a useless bunch of untalented, incompetent, arrogant, upper-class thickoes that Parliament didn't have much choice.) A book about then that is also incisive and illuminating about now, "2000 Years of Upper Class Idiots in Charge" is a hilarious, informative and cantankerous journey through Britain' fascinating and bizarre history. It is as entertaining as a witch burning, and a lot more laughs.

Facts and Fancies


Armando Iannucci - 1997
    A look at the absurdities of modern life.