Don't make a man feel like a woman by talking to him like you would your girlfriend.

    So here's the 3-word summary for ya: BE THE LIGHT.What does that mean? Well, 5000 or so letters I've received from women readers on their dating woes can all be boiled down to this: Does my butt look good in these pants?Well, okay, sorta. What they're really asking is Am I enough? Well, are you? Answer: Wrong question!. Because that's not a game you can win! Focus on this question instead: How can I make the people around me feel like a million bucks?How to Generate the Love You Want Instead of Waiting for It to HappenBecause at any point in life, you have the option to elevate those around you -- with a look, a touch, a phrase of praise, genuine appreciation. Hey, love what you've done with that outfit. That was a great book! Learned so much. Thanks for that fabulous home-cooked meal!When you appreciate and elevate others, they light up. And because we're hypersocial, empathic beings equipped with mirror neurons, YOU light up, and everyone notices: Who is that glow-in-the-dark girl? I want to be around that!Now, you've got a crowd gathered around you. Lonely no more! And instead of coming from a place of lack or need, you're coming from abundance, joy, and choice. A much stronger starting point for any relationship.But most important: Butts and butt fashions change. The power to elevate, on the other hand, is power that cannot be taken away from you. The Tao of Dating is your manual for learning how to be the light and come into your authentic power.What readers say: The content is intelligent and compassionate and enriching far beyond anything to do with dating. In essence, this book somehow, magically, alchemically, brings you back to yourself. Everyday TV and other media specialize in portraying women as cheap and disposable. This book is the antidote. Just by reading it, one is restored to one's own heart. I can think of no better praise. I have read many books about relationships and dating, but The Tao of Dating is one of a kind, so different and mind-blowing in its common sense and simplicity that it is impossible to put it down once you start reading. Thanks to this specific book, I went from having a nonexistent dating life, with empty weeks stretching ahead, to being booked every night of the week...The results were dramatic: I now feel like I have my pick of the litter with a slew of fabulous guys who all clamor for my attention. Why I wrote this book: When I was an advisor at Harvard, I noticed that smart women like yourself were having unfulfilling love lives on an epidemic scale. They either couldn't find the right guy, were with the wrong guy, had relationships that didn't last, or had given up on dating entirely. I wrote this book to remedy the situation.This is not your grandma's dating guide. Partially because I'm not your grandma, and partially because the 21st century poses unprecedented challenges to the modern woman. Is there time for love within a high-powered career? And nowadays, lots of guys are less educated and affluent than you. What to do? I give you tips on how to handle all that.Ancient Wisdom + Modern Science = lasting love + happiness for successful women like yourself. This is a heart-centered, science-based, practical guide to finding fulfillment in your love lives and far beyond, all through a series of small, simple steps that put the fun back in dating. Join the tens of thousands of women who who have transformed their lives with The Tao of Dating.

    F. Heller reveal how an understanding of attachment theory-the most advanced relationship science in existence today-can help us find and sustain love. Attachment theory forms the basis for many bestselling books on the parent/child relationship, but there has yet to be an accessible guide to what this fascinating science has to tell us about adult romantic relationships-until now.Attachment theory owes its inception to British psychologist and psychoanalyst John Bowlby, who in the 1950s examined the tremendous impact that our early relationships with our parents or caregivers has on the people we become. Also central to attachment theory is the discovery that our need to be in a close relationship with one or more individuals is embedded in our genes.In Attached, Levine and Heller trace how these evolutionary influences continue to shape who we are in our relationships today. According to attachment theory, every person behaves in relationships in one of three distinct ways:*ANXIOUS people are often preoccupied with their relationships and tend to worry about their partner's ability to love them back.*AVOIDANT people equate intimacy with a loss of independence and constantly try to minimize closeness.*SECURE people feel comfortable with intimacy and are usually warm and loving.Attached guides readers in determining what attachment style they and their mate (or potential mates) follow. It also offers readers a wealth of advice on how to navigate their relationships more wisely given their attachment style and that of their partner. An insightful look at the science behind love, Attached offers readers a road map for building stronger, more fulfilling connections.

    And yet, this extremely common human experience is so poorly understood. What are we to make of this time-honored taboo—universally forbidden yet universally practiced? Why do people cheat—even those in happy marriages? Why does an affair hurt so much? When we say infidelity, what exactly do we mean? Do our romantic expectations of marriage set us up for betrayal? Is there such a thing as an affair-proof marriage? Is it possible to love more than one person at once? Can an affair ever help a marriage? Perel weaves real-life case stories with incisive psychological and cultural analysis in this fast-paced and compelling book.For the past ten years, Perel has traveled the globe and worked with hundreds of couples who have grappled with infidelity. Betrayal hurts, she writes, but it can be healed. An affair can even be the doorway to a new marriage—with the same person. With the right approach, couples can grow and learn from these tumultuous experiences, together or apart.Affairs, she argues, have a lot to teach us about modern relationships—what we expect, what we think we want, and what we feel entitled to. They offer a unique window into our personal and cultural attitudes about love, lust, and commitment. Through examining illicit love from multiple angles, Perel invites readers into an honest, enlightened, and entertaining exploration of modern marriage in its many variations.Fiercely intelligent, The State of Affairs provides a daring framework for understanding the intricacies of love and desire. As Perel observes, “Love is messy; infidelity more so. But it is also a window, like no other, into the crevices of the human heart.”

    Reasons to Stay Alive is Matt’s inspiring account of how, minute by minute and day by day, he overcame the disease with the help of reading, writing, and the love of his parents and his girlfriend (and now-wife), Andrea. And eventually, he learned to appreciate life all the more for it. Everyone’s lives are touched by mental illness: if we do not suffer from it ourselves, then we have a friend or loved one who does. Matt’s frankness about his experiences is both inspiring to those who feel daunted by depression and illuminating to those who are mystified by it. Above all, his humor and encouragement never let us lose sight of hope. Speaking as his present self to his former self in the depths of depression, Matt is adamant that the oldest cliché is the truest—there is light at the end of the tunnel. He teaches us to celebrate the small joys and moments of peace that life brings, and reminds us that there are always reasons to stay alive.

    A world-renowned relationship expert shares his research about love and what it takes to develop a trustful, intimate, and emotionally fulfilling bond.In this insightful book, celebrated research psychologist and couples counselor John Gottman plumbs the mysteries of love and shares the results of his famous “Love Lab”: Where does love come from? Why does some love last, and why does some fade? And how can we keep it alive? Based on laboratory findings, this book shows readers how to identify signs, behaviors, and attitudes that indicate a fraying relationship and provides strategies for repairing what may seem lost or broken.

    Apps like Tinder and Bumble are supposed to foster connection, but instead serve as a reminder of how painfully single we are. Certified sexologist and intimacy coach Shan Boodram—the most sought-after sex educator on the internet—is about to change all that. In this essential how-to guide, she addresses the realities of life today—when the rules of love and attraction are fluid—and teaches a group of young women how to become master daters in just sixty days.It starts with you. Shan makes clear that love and self-discovery go hand in hand—your dating life is just as much about you as it is about other people. She challenges you to look inside yourself for what you want out of a partner, a relationship and, most important, yourself. Once you figure out what you want from dating, she shows you exactly how to get it. The Game of Desire empowers you to take the lead, learn your strengths, and identify and correct your weaknesses, all the while getting inspired watching a group of women learn how to succeed in today’s dating pool.While many books tell women why they can’t get a date, Shan teaches you the skills and techniques necessary to take charge in today’s competitive and often confusing dating scene, providing the tools essential to attract—and retain—the partner(s) you want. From learning love languages to debunking dating myths, she helps women build knowledge and confidence. Featuring conversational case studies, comprehensive facts about the psychology of sex and romance, and expert insight into sex culture, and written with her trademark humor and charm, The Game of Desire is a must for all of Shan’s fans and for every woman struggling to feel loved and desired.

    In His Needs, Her Needs, Willard Harley identifies the ten most vital needs of men and women and shows husbands and wives how to satisfy those needs in their spouses. He provides guidance for becoming irresistible to your spouse and for loving more creatively and sensitively, thereby eliminating the problems that often lead to extramarital affairs. The revised anniversary edition of His Needs, Her Needs is a celebration of how the book has helped thousands of couples revitalize their marriages during the last fifteen years. This best-seller identifies the causes of marital difficulties and instructs couples on how to prevent them, guiding them to build a relationship that sustains romance and increases intimacy. With today's soaring divorce rate and prevalence of affairs, Harley's insights are needed more than ever before.An unabridged recording of His Needs, Her Needs, the 15th anniversary edition, is now available as an audio book.

    Great relationships don’t just appear in our lives—they’re the culmination of a series of decisions, including whom to date, how to end it with the wrong person, and when to commit to the right one. But our brains often get in the way. We make poor decisions, which thwart us on our quest to find lasting love. Drawing from years of research, behavioral scientist turned dating coach Logan Ury reveals the hidden forces that cause those mistakes. But awareness on its own doesn’t lead to results. You have to actually change your behavior. Ury shows you how. This “simple-to-use guide” (Lori Gottlieb, New York Times bestselling author of Maybe You Should Talk to Someone) focuses on a different decision in each chapter, incorporating insights from behavioral science, original research, and real-life stories. You’ll learn: -What’s holding you back in dating (and how to break the pattern) -What really matters in a long-term partner (and what really doesn’t) -How to overcome the perils of online dating (and make the apps work for you) -How to meet more people in real life (while doing activities you love) -How to make dates fun again (so they stop feeling like job interviews) -Why “the spark” is a myth (but you’ll find love anyway) This “data-driven” (Time), step-by-step guide to relationships, complete with hands-on exercises, is designed to transform your life. How to Not Die Alone will help you find, build, and keep the relationship of your dreams.

    It’s something you do," teaches Terry Real. "It’s a minute-by-minute practice of connecting to others through empathy, vulnerability, and accountability." With Fierce Intimacy, this renowned author offers a revolutionary way of living in connection—one that allows you to cherish your partner, yourself, and your relationship in equal measure.How to Communicate with Love and Respect—Even When You Argue Terry’s approach to relationship is called "full-respect living"—to skillfully and honestly assert your needs while also honoring your partner’s needs. In these six sessions, he presents invaluable training for individuals and couples on developing the skills necessary for this authentic way of connecting. You’ll begin by learning how to clear away the outdated beliefs and habits that keep you from developing healthy self-esteem. Then Terry will help you and your partner transform the Five Losing Strategies that sabotage relationships into the Five Winning Strategies that lead to clear communication, trust, and mutual support. "When we dare to be more vulnerable and open and honest, we are forging new territory," says Terry Real. Whether you’re still seeking a partner or want to breathe new life into your existing relationship, Fierce Intimacy brings you essential tools for connecting with true respect, uncompromising honesty, and ever-deepening love.HIGHLIGHTS • The adaptive child—how to recognize and defuse self-sabotaging habits • Unhealthy self-esteem traps for men and women • Identifying your CNI (Core Negative Image)—a key to making arguments constructive instead of destructive • The Feedback Wheel—a four-step approach to revolutionize your communication • The Five Losing Strategies: our impulses to control, retaliate, and be right all the time • The Five Winning Strategies for shared happiness, connection, and success

    Mars and Venus on a Date is  thorough understanding of the fives stages of dating: attraction, uncertainty, exclusivity, intimacy and engagement as well as a guide to knowing what kind of person you might be looking for and the unexpected places you might just find your soulmate. Filled with practical guidelines, inventive techniques, and witty insight Mars and Venus on a Date will help everyone navigate the dating world.

    For a rising generation young women, the sky is the limit. Women can be anything and have everything. They are outpacing their male peers in higher education and earning the corner office at work. Smart, driven, assertive women are succeeding at just about everything they do--except romance. Why are so many men afraid to date smart women? Modern men claim to want smarts, success, and independence in romantic partners. Or so says the data collected by scientists and dating websites. If that's the case, why are so many independent, successful women winning in life, but losing in love? Journalist Jenna Birch has finally named the perplexing reason: "the love gap"--or that confusing rift between who men say they want to date and who they actually commit to. Backed by extensive data, research, in-depth interviews with experts and real-life relationship stories, The Love Gap is the first book to explore the most talked-about dating trend today. The guide also establishes a new framework for navigating modern relationships, and the tricky new gender dynamics that impact them. Women can, and should, have it all without settling.

    A mate, on the other hand, is becoming harder and harder to find. The age-old quest for true love requires more effort than ever before. Let’s face it: Dating is work.Which, as it happens, is exactly where it began, in the nineteenth century—as prostitution. In Labor of Love, Moira Weigel dives into the secret history of dating while holding up a mirror to the contemporary dating landscape, revealing why we date the way we do and explaining why it feels so much like work. This isn’t a guide to “getting the guy”; there are no ridiculous “rules” to follow in Labor of Love. This is a brilliant, fresh, and utterly original approach to help us understand how dating was invented and, hopefully, to lead us closer to the happy ending that it promises.

     For as far back as humanity goes, women have struggled to understand why men behave the way they do. Does he like me? Why won’t he commit? Why doesn’t he text back? Does he mean what he says? Why is he withdrawing? How does he really feel? These are just a few examples of questions that women all over the world are desperate to know the answers to… and now they can, once and for all. This book takes a look at the most common relationship scenarios—the ones that cause the most confusion—and explains everything. It provides a breakdown of the male psyche, as well as honest confessions from the authors and men who were brave enough to share their stories. 10 Things Every Woman Needs to Know About Men will free you from all your doubts and confusion and give you the gift of clarity. You will never again feel the need to try to figure him out… instead you can bask in the joy of just understanding exactly why he does what he does.

    Mystery gained mainstream attention for his role in Neil Strauss's New York Times bestselling exposé, The Game. Now he has written the definitive handbook on the art of the pickup.He developed his unique method over years of observing social dynamics and interacting with women in clubs to learn how to overcome the guard shield that many women use to deflect come-ons from "average frustrated chumps."The Mystery Method: How to Get Beautiful Women Into Bed shares tips such as:*Give more attention to her less attractive friend at first, so your target will get jealous and try to win your attention.*Always approach a target within 3 seconds of noticing her. If a woman senses your hesitation, her perception of your value will be lower.*Don't be picky. Approach as many groups of people in a bar as you can and entertain them with fun conversation. As you move about the room, positive perception of you will grow. Now it's easy to meet anyone you want.*Smile. Guys who don't get laid, don't smile.