Like the bungling burglar who logged on to his own Facebook page at his victim's house - and forgot to turn the computer off when he left, or the stupid bank robber who made his escape in his own car - complete with personalised number plates, or the idiotic criminal who tried to hand himself into the police... in order to collect the reward. Award-winning writer Andrew Penman has scoured the country for this hilarious collection of those who are not just bad, but also dim very dim. 'Andrew Penman enjoys a laugh at the expense of Britain's most stupid burglars' - The Mirror 'Exploits so dim-witted it's surprising they ever managed to keep themselves breathing long enough to commit any crime' - Wales Online Illustrated with cartoons drawn by Neil Kerber.

    Years later—one struggling with his identity in a world hostile to his ancestry, the other creating the world’s most famous detective while in love with a woman who is not his wife–their fates become inextricably connected.In Arthur & George, Julian Barnes explores the grand tapestry of late-Victorian Britain to create his most intriguing and engrossing novel yet.

    The Job is an explosive and intriguing account of what it takes to be a criminal investigator at the highest level.

    Some of his tales will seem far fetched, unless you're a cop and then you know that anything can happen - and just when you think you've seen it all, someone will surprise you.

    She has no identification on her, just a scribbled note for an appointment that morning with Madeleine Porter, a local family historian. Did she fall or was she pushed? The police struggle to identify the mystery woman and Madeleine, intrigued by the case, decides to do her own investigation. She uncovers a mixture of adultery, ballroom dancing and greed before discovering the reason behind her presence on the beach.

    On his release from one of America's toughest prisons, Howard made a promise to himself to go straight. No more drugs, no more smuggling, no more fake passports. He would retire to a quiet life with his family in the Balearic Islands of Spain. It didn't quite work out that way.This was the mid-nineties, the height of the ecstasy and clubbing boom, and Ibiza was at the very centre of the vortex for the 'E generation'. Pills had taken the place of marijuana, Paul Oakenfold had replaced The Rolling Stones as the music of the masses, but some people are just born for life on the other side of the law.It wasn't long before Howard found himself trying pure ecstasy and rubbing shoulders with some of the king-pins of the pill trade. These included some of Britain's most notorious gangsters, who were laundering millions of pounds of gold stolen from the legendary Brink's-Mat bullion raid. As Britons descended on Ibiza ahead of one of the greatest summers of the nineties, Howard was preparing for his most outrageous operation yet.Incredibly funny, moving and scabrous, Howard Marks' Mr Smiley follows a journey to the heartland of the clubbing and British crime scene. It is also a fitting last word from one of Britain's best loved bad boys.

    A meditation on life, a philosophical enquiry into human nature and a profoundly funny dissection of urban madness.Christopher Ross, philosopher and traveller, decided to cease his journeyings and go underground, working for a year as a station assistant on Platform 6 (northbound Victoria Line) at Oxford Circus. After training school, where he is taught how not to electrocute himself and always to look a member of the public in the eye as they are assaulting you, he faces up to his new duties with a mixture of curiosity and foreboding.‘Tunnel Visions’ is a delightful mixture of lived experience in the sureal world of London’s Underground and the more elevated ideas, thoughts and imaginings that experience provokes. Oxford Circus station, complete with its weeping wall, its streakers, buskers, onanists and cupboard containing one employee whose ideal working day was to sleep soundly 100 feet below ground, is a Plato’s Cave of reflection and human comedy. Christopher Ross, a still point in the whirling stream of the bizarre and otherworldly life below ground, has written a profoundly funny book.

    Now a journalist is following them.When Stieg Larsson died, the author of The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo had been working on a true mystery that out-twisted his Millennium novels: the assassination on February 28, 1986, of Olof Palme, the Swedish prime minister. It was the first time in history that a head of state had been murdered without a clue who’d done it—and on a Stockholm street at point-blank range.Internationally known for his fictional far-right villains, Larsson was well acquainted with their real-life counterparts and documented extremist activities throughout the world. For years he’d been amassing evidence that linked their terrorist acts to what he called “one of the most astounding murder cases” he’d ever covered. Larsson’s archive was forgotten until journalist Jan Stocklassa was given exclusive access to the author’s secret project.In The Man Who Played with Fire, Stocklassa collects the pieces of Larsson’s true-crime puzzle to follow the trail of intrigue, espionage, and conspiracy begun by one of the world’s most famous thriller writers. Together they set out to solve a mystery that no one else could.

    Renowned for serial hostage taking and his rooftop sieges, he is a legend in his own lifetime. Yet behind the crime and the craziness, there is a great deal more to Charlie. He is a man of great warmth and humor; a man of great artistic talent who exhibits his drawings around the country; and a man with an overpowering urge not to let the system get him down. Insanity is a look into the mind of a true individual—a wild, inspired, single-minded, fascinating man, oppressed not only by the workings of his singular mind, but also by the system that confines him.

    This is her true story. During a terrifying journey that began as a 14-year-old armed robber, she has been shot four times, tasered three times by police and served three jail terms. Convicted for armed robbery she was released from prison only to go out and attempt to murder four people. Gypsy Jane has led a life packed with crime, betrayal, drugs and murder but she classes herself as a woman of principles: she values loyalty and honour, and has only ever wanted a 'normal' life.

    There were no screams when she was taken, suggesting the culprit was someone familiar to her, and when she turned up again in a nearby village several days later, she was found in perfect health and happiness. No one was ever accused of a crime. The incident quickly faded from her memory, and her parents never discussed it. To the contrary, they deliberately hid it from her, and she did not learn of it for half a century. This was not the only secret her parents kept from her. For many years, while raising her in draconian isolation and protectiveness, they also hid the fact that she’d been adopted, and that shortly after the kidnapping, her name was changed from Grace to Betty. In Five Days Gone, Laura Cumming brilliantly unspools the tale of her mother’s life and unravels the multiple mysteries at its core. Using photographs from the time, historical documents, and works of art, Cumming investigates this case of stolen identity with the toolset of a detective and the unique intimacy of a daughter trying to understand her family’s past and its legacies. Compulsive, vivid, and profoundly touching, Five Days Gone is a masterful blend of memoir and history, an extraordinary personal narrative unlike any other.

    Her foster father, Sion Jenkins, who had just been appointed headteacher of the local boys' secondary school, was arrested and charged with the murder. In July 1998 he was convicted and sent to prison for life. The case went on to become one of the most controversial in British criminal justice history. After a momentous legal battle, in which there were altogether an unprecedented six court hearings, he was finally acquitted in February 2006. Jenkins was lambasted in newspaper and television reports. So the real facts of the case were buried under an avalanche of innuendo and misinformation. Now, for the first time, this book puts on record his version of what actually happened.

    It's the late 1960s and homosexuality has only just been legalised, and Jeremy Thorpe, the leader of the Liberal party, has a secret he's desperate to hide. As long as Norman Scott, his beautiful, unstable lover is around, Thorpe's brilliant career is at risk. With the help of his fellow politicians, Thorpe schemes, deceives, embezzles - until he can see only one way to silence Scott for good.The trial of Jeremy Thorpe changed our society forever: it was the moment the British public discovered the truth about its political class. Illuminating the darkest secrets of the Establishment, the Thorpe affair revealed such breath-taking deceit and corruption in an entire section of British society that, at the time, hardly anyone dared believe it could be true.

    Among a UK prison population of close to 100,000, fewer than 40 men and women have been told they will end their days in a prison cell. They range from men who crossed continents to slay youngsters, to contract killers who relished their grisly calling. Some planned their killings in a sick and sadistic manner, others killed in an unanticipated explosion of rage, lust, greed or jealously. But whatever their crime, whatever their motive, each of these beasts has one thing in common: they are the most evil people in our prison system. A graphic and harrowing read, this book is the first ever to bring together the case histories of every full-term lifer in Britain's jails. It offers never-before-published information about these extraordinary offenders. Police, lawyers and the relatives of the victims and killers all describe how the truth behind these awful crimes was pieced together and those responsible were brought to justice to face the harshest punishment. These are the 36 monsters deemed beyond redemption, who by their own hands forfeited the right to live among us, forever. These are the killers whose crimes were such that society demanded that ...LIFE MEANS LIFE!

    An excellent corrective to the Hollywood version of cops and crime.’ Miles Corwin ‘These are stories told by one cop to another - raw, unfiltered and funny. This book is both laugh-out-loud hilarious and moving.’ Jane Bussman WE ARE THE COPS is an adrenalin-fuelled ride through the lives of America’s police, told in the authentic voices of the cops themselves. The journey begins with the rookie’s first day on the job, and moves through the heartbreak of officers dying in the line of duty, the bloody reality of policing savage gang wars, the devastating consequences of drug crime, a gut-wrenching cop’s eye view of 9/11, and even an encounter with a runaway gorilla called Little Joe. These real-life stories from crime fighting’s front line come from cops of every rank, from chiefs to street cops, working in big cities and small towns all over the US. The result is a stunning montage of brutal, funny and sometimes tragic true events which paints a vivid and unforgettable portrait of life as an American cop.