Any similarity to actual persons living or in Los Angeles is strictly unintentional, including the stuff on page 54 that will remind many people of Snigbert Knuddsen.From the turkeys extremely large ego to its arrogant behavior, the traits are classified. Boynton traces the turkey's influence on history, the neighborhood, the family, more. Several profiles in turkitude and a pop quiz further uncover turkeys in the immediate vicinity. Forewarned is forearmed: turkeys possess absolutely unwarranted and absolutely unshakable self-confidence. They insist on high visibility, and can show up at a party, in an argument, on the jogging path. The reader's best defense is through study of this important manual, keying in on the single most important turkey fact: a turkey never knows that it is a turkey.

    In spades.We ask that when you pore over this glorious work you spare some thought for the humble cartographers and surveyors who made journeys into the darker corners of our metropolis - no less dangerous than the wilds of Skund or Bhangbhangduc. To some the only memorial is the map you now possess. Others, in their quest for knowledge, paid the highest price that scholarship demands, which is to say, a day off in lieu.And so we dedicate this map and these accompanying words to the officers, councilors and members of the Merchants' Guild and to all who will find in its pages paths yet to tread and places yet to explore within the magnificentbwonder that is the city of Ankh-Morpork.

    In her trademark bossy, witty, and authoritative way, Miss Manners gives advice that will make the big day more pleasant for one and all, including the bride. 15 line drawings.

    The soft, reflective, and often humorous words and pictures create a glimpse into everyday life through wide and wondering eyes that blends the familiar with the profoundly spiritual.

    Her honest, hilarious and moving account of the whys and hows of having a baby makes perfect reading for expectant mothers and fathers everywhere, as well as those who've been there, done that, and wonder how on earth they did.In this very funny book she writes candidly about her own personal experience exploring the decision to have a baby when she doesn't even like them, the importance of cheese during pregnancy, why she took hair straighteners to the labour ward, plus the apocalyptic newborn days, childcare, work and the inevitable impact on life and love and most importantly, her breasts.

    Start with the book: a rich, oversize anthology, jam-packed with America's most provocative and pointed satire -- including 80 Sunday strips in full color. From O.J. and Mr. Butts to Whitewater and Tailgate, from Mike, Kim, and Alex's funky software start-up company to Duke and Earl's Las Vegas long shots, Trudeau tracks the fierce strangeness of end-of-century life through the ever-intertwining fortunes of his substantial cast.Bundled with this impressive tome is the Doonesbury Flashbacks CD-ROM, a complete account of all things Doonesbury over the course of the strip's first 25 years. The disc contains more than 9,000 strips, archived with every search mode imaginable -- readers can locate strips by character, topic, chronology, dialogue, or location. Contemporary newspaper headlines, articles, quotes, and factoids give useful context for the historically clueless. Other features include a digital bibliography of Doonesbury books, posters, videos, and audio recordings; a Doonesbury trivia game, complete with unctuous host (Mike) and decorative hostess (Boopsie); a Doonesbury timeline; elaborate character bios; and animation. A useful print capability lets users generate crisp refrigerator art from any strip.Thanks to this digital cornucopia you can relive the ages of Aquarius, Reagan, and O.J. through the eyes of G.B. Trudeau and his merry band of misfits.

    They may have nine lives but there is much cats can teach us about getting the most out of the one we have. Whether it’s advice for purrfecting your downtime, navigating romance, friendships or your career, this book features 100 essential lessons to help you through the ups and downs of life, such as:- A beautiful mane takes serious work- … and so does the perfect set of nails - Preserve your dignity at all times- Stretch regularly- Demand the bestSo, put down your self-help book and pick up your cat. It’s time to take a nap with the life guru you never knew you had. (Please see life lesson no.1.)Perfect for fans of Simon's Cat and How to Tell if Your Cat is Plotting to Kill You .

    He's been a bird-watcher for over thirty years. He's probably the only person ho could have written this book. Only he combines the inside knowledge with the tactlessness and lack of decency required to spill the beans. The misery, the scandal, the heartbreak of bird-watching - it's all in BILL ODDIE'S LITTLE BLACK BIRD BOOK.

    His stable is a matchbox with a tic-tac box conservatory and with a cocktail stick, some cotton and a hawthorn berry, Tim can play swingball.

    Now I know why my dog likes her better. 2. I wish this were the worst thing she’d ever told me. About the book In “The Warlizard Chronicles”, Warlizard tells the tales of a misspent youth, from the story of his “dog-gasmic” ex-fiancée to the logic of serving as a German linguist in Iraq. The stories are light, fast-paced, graphic, and not remotely safe for work. You have been warned. Reader feedback: - “You tell all women that story? You should wash out your mouth!” - “I think I could listen to your stories for hours.” - “So you owe your marriage to the people who brought down the world trade center?” - “I have nothing else I can add or ask, except MORE STORIES.” - “Holy s**t. I wish I was you.” - “You slept with another man's wife and then lied to him about it, and can say with a straight face it was the right thing to do?” - “Godda***t, I spewed out laughter too loud at work, now I have to leave because everyone knows I'm not doing s**t. F*** this is hilarious, and disconcerting, at the same time.” - “He is the most interesting man in the world.” - “I feel like a failure reading these stories, they're awesome.” - “Your life experience makes me feel good. You good sir are somewhat of a new idol of mine. Nothing much you can do about that. Have a good day sir.” - “Warlizard doesn't always drink beer, but when he does, he prefers Dos Equis.” - “I just can't wrap my mind around the fact that not only a story like this exists but that a Reddit regular would be living it. And it kinda has this enthusiastic ‘and then it happened...’ moments in it that kinda style like you'd write fiction on the go.” - “This guy is either the most creative man in the world or the most interesting man in the world. Either way...”

    The poems are accompanied by line drawings.

    When the bird refuses to leave Tom's side, the young teacher has no choice but to take it with him and look after it. This is their story.

    But when the small, prickly creature says he is a pirate — and that Buddy is a pirate too — the two mismatched friends are off on a grand adventure.In this first book in the Buddy and Earl series, a dog who likes to play by the rules meets a hedgehog who knows no limits. Their friendship is tender and loyal, and their adventures are funny and imaginative. Maureen Fergus’s text is witty and understated, and Carey Sookocheff’s art emphasizes both the humor and the warmth of this odd and loveable animal couple.Coming in 2016 — Buddy and Earl Go Exploring and Buddy and Earl and the Great Big Baby.

    Do you have any idea what animal can paint a recognizable figure on a canvass using a paintbrush? Do you know of any animal that can teach themselves how to open canned food? How about those that can play computer games, solve math problems and logical puzzles just like humans…or even better than humans? The fun does not stop there.Any idea what animal has razor sharp memory that can recognize the meaning of a word or a face from years ago? And of course there is the animal that communicates by singing lengthy songs. If another animal of the same species hears the song, it will repeat the exact same song as a response! And speaking of songs, let’s not forget the animal who can sing lullabies while nursing her young. This Book Has Amazing Facts & Photos of 15 Incredibly Smart Animals. For centuries, understanding how animals act and think has always been a very intriguing topic for scientists. After all, though humans are branded to be the most intelligent species on the planet, it is undeniable that our fellow occupants in the animal kingdom have their own fascinating brainpower, instincts and unique survival tactics to boast. Just as humans have a unique way to communicate; other creatures have also forged special ways to understand each other and to respond to their environments. Scientists did countless laboratory experiments to capture not just their communicating abilities but also their feelings and emotions, learning processes, memory capacity, and their ability to use tools or even to pick up a foreign language.This book is fully illustrated and has simple blocks of text that will make learning fun for your child.The following animals are featured: Spiders Ants Sea Lions Crows Raccoons Horses Falcons Cats Squirrels Elephants Dogs Whales Dolphins Pigs Chimpanzees Yours kids can have fun while learning!Prepare to learn the most astonishing facts about how these animals stand out from the rest in terms of intelligence.This book is part of a series called, "Weird & Wonderful Animals" all of which are great for bedtime reading. Collect the series!

    ‘That Bear Ate My Pants!’, ‘Don’t Need The Whole Dog!’ and ‘Kamikaze Kangaroos!’ follow on from one another to form a hilarious and heart-warming adventure that spans the globe.Over a thousand pages in total, with more than 1,900 5-star reviews across Amazon, these three tales are guaranteed to keep you chuckling into the early hours. *** Save 1/3 off the individual cover prices with this special box-set edition for a limited time only! *** 'That Bear Ate My Pants!' The incredible TRUE story of one man's struggle to survive in an Ecuadorian animal refuge.There comes a time in every man’s life when he says to himself, "Holy crap! I’m about to be eaten by a bear!"Tony James Slater went to Ecuador, determined to become a man.It never occurred to him that 'or die trying' might be an option...The trouble with volunteering in a South American animal refuge is that everything wants a piece of you. And the trouble with being Tony, is that most of them got one.Just how do you 'look after' something that’s trying it’s damnedest to kill you and eat you?And how do you find love when you a) don’t speak the language, and b) are constantly covered in excrement and entrails?If only he’d had some relevant experience. Other than owning a pet rabbit when he was nine. And if only he’d bought some travel insurance... 'Don’t Need The Whole Dog!’ The bizarre-but-true story of one man's epic mission to escape the daily grind, and find his destiny in paradise. In the summer of 2004, Tony James Slater went to Ecuador, looking to become a man.Not all of him returned. But the bit that did was fuelled by a burning desire to do... something.Something that mattered.And, ideally, to get the hell out of England in the process.His dream was to blatantly steal his friend Toby's dream –of escaping to Thailand and becoming a professional diver.But when a man like this goes on a search for adventure, it's bound to end in tears.After all, this isn't just any old idiot.This is Tony James Slater – the man who was carrying that jaguar when it woke up.And to make things worse – he's not alone…So batten down the hatches! Lock up your power tools! Andfor gawd's sake turn the electricity off.Because that idiot from Ecuador is back.And this time, he's brought the whole family… ‘Kamikaze Kangaroos!’ Tony James Slater knew nothing about Australia.Except for the fact that he’d just arrived there.The stage is set for an outrageous adventure: three people, one van, on an epic, 20,000 mile road trip around Australia.What could possibly go wrong?Of course, the van – nicknamed ‘Rusty’ – is a crumbling wreck, held together by the world’s most garish paint job.