Purchase includes a free trial membership in the publisher's book club where you can select from more than a million books without charge. Chapters: Still Life With Woodpecker, Villa Incognito, Fierce Invalids Home From Hot Climates, Jitterbug Perfume, Even Cowgirls Get the Blues, Skinny Legs and All, Another Roadside Attraction, Half Asleep in Frog Pajamas. Source: Wikipedia. Free updates online. Not illustrated. Excerpt: Still Life With Woodpecker (1980) is the third novel by Tom Robbins, concerning the love affair between an environmentalist princess and an outlaw. As with most of Robbins' books, it encompasses a broad range of topics, from aliens and redheads to consumerism, the building of bombs, romance, royalty, the moon, and a pack of Camels. The novel continuously addresses the question of how to make love stay. The story is sometimes called a post-modern fairy tale. The book begins in "the final quarter of the twentieth century," at a year never specified, presumably in the early 1980s. It revolves around a family of deposed European royalty living in a small house in the suburbs outside of Seattle, under the protection of the CIA. They consist of: the father, King Max, a former gambler and poker player whose prosthetic heart valve makes a loud scraping noise when he gets excited; the mother, Queen Tilli, an opera-lover with a strong foreign accent and a fondness for saying "Oh, oh, spaghetti-o"; Gulietta, the non-English-speaking maid (and, as it turns out, Max's half-sister) and the daughter, Leigh-Cheri, a redheaded vegetarian liberal princess and former cheerleader, having pulled out of classes after being asked to resign from the cheer squad after having a miscarriage while cheering at a football game. Leigh-Cheri proclaims herself celibate, withdraws from public life and cloisters herself in her room, only to emerge to ask her parents for permission to go to the Care Fest, a lib...More: http: //booksllc.net/?id=217300

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    Casey, author of Stygian Doorways

    He watched his father ascend the ranks within the academy to become one of the most respected warriors in the kingdom. The only thing he has ever wanted is to become an academy student and follow the path of his father. Unfortunately, only the best can enter the academy and Justan is a horrible fighter. Everyone tells him that he is more suited to scholarly work than swordplay. In desperation he hurls himself into training, eager to overcome the doubters and walk into the academy triumphant, unaware that secretive powers plot to disrupt his plans. Meanwhile, an evil wizard of immense power is using magic to twist the bodies of the creatures of the land and transform them into monsters. With these creatures and the peoples of the wilds, he is building an army . . . Ogres and dragons, warriors and wizards are destined to clash, their fates guided by The Bowl of Souls.

    Telling three interconnected stories taking place on the same day, two weeks after events in "The Foul Mouth and the Mancy Martial Artist" this novel is a can't miss for fans of THE KING HENRY TAPES. Spending equal time with Tyson Bonnie, Eva Reti, and King Henry Price himself, KING HENRY AND THE THREE LITTLE TRIPS shows the fallout from the Days of Supernatural Exhibit in both the personal cost for our characters and the political cost for supernatural organizations worldwide as fear of the Curator spreads to even the Asylum itself. Read as Tyson Bonnie escorts Vicky Welf to the Coyote Nation compound, find out if Eva Reti can survive the anima experiment inflicted upon her, and follow King Henry as he returns to the Asylum seeking Plutarch's help. The queue for the "Foul Mouth and the Pit of No Return" roller-coaster begins here! THE KING HENRY TAPES Book 1 - "The Foul Mouth and the Fanged Lady" (released) Book 2 - "The Foul Mouth and the Cat Killing Coyotes" (released) Book 3 - "The Foul Mouth and the Troubled Boomworm" (released) Book 4 - "The Foul Mouth and the Headless Hunny" (released) Book 5 - "The Foul Mouth and the Mancy Martial Artist" (released) Book 5.5 - "King Henry and the Three Little Trips" (released) Book 6 - "The Foul Mouth and the Pit of No Return" (forthcoming)

    But monsters come in many forms. Teenage boys, drug addiction, underage sex - single mother Sarah battles to keep these demons from her daughters.As the long nights of worry start to feed Sarah's paranoia, she must take desperate measures to save her family.Although sometimes, the only way to kill a monster......is to become one."The epitome of chilling vampire noir. Cements Jenkins' pre-eminence in the realm of terror."NATHAN JONES - Author of THE NOWHERE

     A restless Wind spirit... A treacherous shaman... A golden walrus... And one courageous young girl. . In the frozen north, a land of deadly weather and unforgiving spirits, the shaman is all that stands in the way of disaster. When Alaana is called upon to become shaman for the Anatatook people she discovers a kaleidoscopic world where everything is alive, where the tent skins whisper at night and even the soapstone pot has tales to tell. She faces vengeful ghosts and hungry demons as she travels the dangerous path to becoming a shaman. And there's just one other problem. Girls aren't allowed to be shamans. This is Book One in an epic fantasy series with a unique arctic setting. All fans of fantasy will enjoy these five novels.

    Real mermaids don't have fins. Summoning ocean currents at will and feeling the auras of those around her are Candeon capabilities completely wasted at high school. When the memory of an underwater battle surfaces in her dreams, Haelo realizes there is more to her story than she thought. And Dagger, the only other Candeon at school, might have the answers she needs. Haelo is about to discover that high school is poor preparation for the alarming future set out before her.

    There, he hopes to find a miracle. As the Brotherhood of Beggars informed him that a Thaumaturge may live there, in the form of the true Magietrois. However, Smoke's quest for his friends' resurrection is on constrained time. Duke Burmistrz of Centzo City plans to attack Verbrannt within a year's time.

     "Those who try to change Form without likewise shifting Function are doomed to a lifetime of agony and mediocrity--or they make the best assassins." -Auld Wynfor Ganlin An orphan with powers not seen in a thousand years, trapped in a world only she can see, her life a waking nightmare. A boy long ago lost to his family, forced to masquerade as the enemy by one of his own, his continued facade his people's only hope of salvation. An immortal trapped in the flesh of a man, a prisoner for something he has not yet done, fleeing something he thought he had killed. A girl abandoned in the mountains, without memories or a note, her people the stuff of legends, but whose villages have never been found. Meet these and many more incredible characters as they engage in a complex struggle for survival in the latest gripping King book, set in a realm about to plunge in a downward spiral of politics, death, and treachery. Like all King novels, every chapter of this epic fantasy adventure will leave you immersed in her world until you've turned the very last page, going toe-to-toe with the classics. If you enjoy sword and sorcery and are looking for a heart-pounding action & adventure, get ready to be blown away. This is an ILLUSTRATED serialized novel, with each part being approximately 70,000 words, and containing exclusive access to Lance MacCarty's desktop backgrounds and full-resolution downloadable images of the scenes contained within the book.

    The Victorian house near the cliffs holds much more than painful memories, and when lightning strikes midnight, family secrets unfold. She and her sisters have no choice but to work together, as they find strength they never knew they had . . . and face danger from a place they never knew existed.

    

    For Claire Anderson, this crosses the line. To make matters worse, they’re on the lam and can’t be returned to sender until In Between, the afterlife way station, can arrange transportation to pick them up. In the meantime, Claire tries to contain this motley crew, hoping to stave off an international incident. How do they manage to walk among us? Will Claire succeed in repatriating them? And at what cost? The Afterlife Coach is a humorous tale of second chances, self-awareness and, for those among us who make bad choices, demonstrates just how hard it is to die happily ever after.

    In this first volume of his misadventures, Gussett sets his sights on the most prestigious prize in golf, the petrified middle finger of St. Andrew, patron saint of Scotland. Presiding over the world's most cantankerous golf club, Gussett must motivate his members through battles with incontinence, single malt Scotch, and a litany of other unmentionable afflictions in a friendly competition with their ancient rivals, the notorious McGregor clan. Anyone who loves the game or knows someone who does will be unable to resist Feherty's hilarious storytelling and golfing gravitas.

    The call is so powerful that no one can resist. The only way to stop the calling is to trek up the treacherous Drakken Peak to confront your destiny.Dima Marren is a simple peasant from the small village of Pithe in the Darkken Empire. Her life was never meant to amount to anything, until she hears the Call of the Dragons. Honor and wealth await, if she can survive what’s to come.If chosen, riders must attend the Legion Academy and take part in the deadly Dragon Games--a brutal competition designed to cull the weak.On her quest, Dima meets Arlen, a gorgeous, but infuriating Noble Rider who reveals the truth about the academy and games. Despite hating one another, they will need each other to survive what's to come.If she can trust him, the truth will change everything.