Sex Hell


Joe Canzano - 2016
    How is love related to sex, and how is sex related to love--and do love and sex need to be related at all?*This book contains profanity and adult situations

Midlife Happy Hour: Our Reward for Surviving Careers, Kids, and Chaos (Midlife Cabernet Book 2)


Elaine Ambrose - 2016
    Elaine Ambrose boldly writes her latest kiss-my-attitude book as a sassy sequel to Midlife Cabernet. Ambrose shares her festive life experiences and career-crushing anecdotes as she explains how to remain relevant after age 50, why grown children make great travel companions, and how to balance midlife without falling over. Ambrose notes that her feminine mystique sprung a leak after years of competing as a funny female in a serious male job market. Now the hard work is done, and she invites midlife women to join her for Happy Hour.

Ronald Rabbit is a Dirty Old Man


Lawrence Block - 1971
    His boss realized that his editorial position was made redundant months ago, his wife’s discovered that she’s got more in common with his best friend Steve, and his ex-wife and her father are on his case for the alimony he owes. What’s a guy to do? How about write them all letters telling them just what he thinks and letting them know that life hasn’t got Laurence down—it’s got him running away on a lurid and highly erotic adventure with a bevy of naughty young things.   This ebook features an illustrated biography of Lawrence Block, including rare photos and never-before-seen documents from his personal collection, and a new afterword written by the author.

Doughnut


Tom Holt - 2013
    A circle of fried doughy perfection. A source of comfort in trying times, perhaps. For Theo Bernstein, however, it is far, far more.Things have been going pretty badly for Theo Bernstein. An unfortunate accident at work has lost him his job (and his work involved a Very Very Large Hadron Collider, so he's unlikely to get it back). His wife has left him. And he doesn't have any money.Before Theo has time to fully appreciate the pointlessness of his own miserable existence, news arrives that his good friend Professor Pieter van Goyen, renowned physicist and Nobel laureate, has died.By leaving the apparently worthless contents of his safety deposit to Theo, however, the professor has set him on a quest of epic proportions. A journey that will rewrite the laws of physics. A battle to save humanity itself.This is the tale of a man who had nothing and gave it all up to find his destiny -- and a doughnut.

Air Mail: Letters From The World's Most Troublesome Passenger


Terry Ravenscroft - 2007
    But are they? He is probably the only man who has ever requested the recipe for an airline’s lasagna or wanted to enjoy his flight with an inflatable rubber woman sat on his knee. Prepare to meet the man who must have his diet of stir-fried mulberry leaves accommodated and the man who left his false teeth on a flight and is sure he recognized them on a later flight—in a flight attendant's mouth. Ravenscroft's correspondence tackles travel annoyances like excess baggage charges alongside more surreal letters, such as the one starting out asking an Australian airline if they offer an authentic Australian experience (for instance, Australian cuisine or in-flight movies) which then moves on to the question of at what age a baby is safe from being swallowed by a dingo.

Duncan Delaney and the Cadillac of Doom


A.L. Haskett - 2000
    And that's not the craziest part of the story. A.L. Haskett opens a can of worms by asking the age-old question: Where does a sensitive cowboy artist go to escape the clutches of his mother's wealth so he can pursue his art in peace? Well, not Los Angeles, but Duncan Delaney doesn't know this. Haunted by his father's unfortunate death, Duncan is spurred to action by love and a lunatic Indian pal. Like so many who come to La La Land searching for a brighter future, Duncan finds himself on the seedy side of Hollywood trying in vain to dodge the Cadillac of Doom. A finely told cautionary tale for anyone fond of strippers, bikers, and art dealers.

Chihuahua Karma


Debby Rice - 2011
    Cherry Paget's is a Chihuahua.Cherry was young, beautiful and rich-just golden enough to imagine that she had the world by the balls. Death was the furthest thing from her mind. But even a morbid obsession with the afterlife could not have prepared her for what happened.Chihuahua Karma chronicles the horrendous consequences of Cherry's bad choices. She trades love for a Black American Express card. She dumps veterinarian, Richard Preston, to marry gangster, Larry Finkelstein. And, when a smudge of magenta lipstick confirms that Larry is cheating she washes down a fist-full of Vicoden with a bottle of wine for breakfast. That mistake is the beginning of her problems.In an inebriated attempt at tanning, Cherry plunges from the terrace of her penthouse to the street below. She escapes extinction only to encounter a more complicated fate. Cherry regains consciousness trapped inside the body of a very tiny dog.Cherry's diminutive prison is a mini Chi named Sugar. The Lucky Dream Dry Cleaners is her dismal new home. With the unwitting assistance of her former housekeeper, Cherry escapes the dirty clothes and cotton dust. Once again ensconced in Larry's luxurious penthouse, she becomes his girlfriend's prized purse-buddy.In her diminished state, Cherry finds new perspective. She yearns for Richard. And she forms an unlikely alliance with Don Paco Fernandez, a temperamental ghost with a taste for tequila and pretty ladies. Through Don Paco, Cherry discovers that only she can save an orphaned child from her impending adoption by a sinister couple. The cast of off-beat characters collides, and Cherry meets her destiny at a casino night Christmas party.Chihuahua Karma could easily share a shelf with humorous fiction like the Devil Wears Prada and the Nanny Diaries. Sugars fans include women who love fashion, passion and small dogs and any reader who enjoys unraveling a quirky plot to its surprising conclusion.Debby Rice is a writer from Chicago. She has spent time in Mexico City, San Miguel Allende, New Orleans and San Francisco, and her experiences in those cities color her work. Rice blurs the distinctions between fantasy and reality and immerses her readers in a vividly imagined new world.

Warrior Academy: A Hiro's Journey - Episode 1


G.L. Rathweg - 2017
    Now in a world forever changed, a place where magic is real, and monsters have come to life. A place where magic and science blend with pop culture

Pundragon


Chandra Clarke - 2020
    After all, what’s he going to be able to do about it? He’s just this guy, stuck in a small town, pinned there by a load of student debt and a stalled writing career. Oh, and a wicked case of writer’s block.Or at least he was, until a dragon showed up in his bedroom. At midnight. Quoting Freud and muttering about the space-time continuum.So of course, Ian must Make a Choice and decide whether he wants to follow the dragon back into the Connectome and find his muse again, or stay in a house that surely wants to kill him, one repair bill at a time.Follow Ian on a rollicking adventure, where he finds out that he can make a difference. And that some things are worth fighting for.Even if all you have is a can opener.

Holy Cow


David Duchovny - 2015
    One night, Elsie and Mallory sneak out of their pasture; but while Mallory is interested in flirting with the neighboring bulls, Elsie finds herself drawn to the farmhouse. Through the window, she sees the farmer's family gathered around a bright Box God-and what the Box God reveals about something called an "industrial meat farm" shakes Elsie's understanding of her world to its core.There's only one solution: escape to a better, safer world. And so a motley crew is formed: Elsie; Jerry-excuse me, Shalom-a cranky, Torah-reading pig who's recently converted to Judaism; and Tom, a suave (in his own mind, at least) turkey who can't fly, but who can work an iPhone with his beak. Toting stolen passports and slapdash human disguises, they head for the airport.Elsie is our wise-cracking, pop-culture-reference-dropping, slyly witty narrator; Tom-who does eventually learn to fly (sort of)-dispenses psychiatric advice in a fake German accent; and Shalom, rejected by his adopted people in Jerusalem, ends up unexpectedly uniting Israelis and Palestinians. David Duchovny's charismatic creatures point the way toward a mutual understanding and acceptance that the world desperately needs.

Return to Centaur


Richard Pini - 1990
    

Humorous Ghost Stories


Dorothy Scarborough - 1921
    You may find it for free on the web. Purchase of the Kindle edition includes wireless delivery.

The Pornographer Diaries


Danny King - 2004
    He talks to the models, he reads hundreds of filthy readers' letters, he organises the photoshoots and even gets to direct the action. He has, according to his non-porn friends, "the best job in the world". But Godfrey Bishop has a problem. Godfrey Bishop is going through the sex drought to end all sex droughts. He hasn't been with a woman in over a year and this knee-twisting frustration is magnified a hundred times by his daily grind. He feels like Billy Bunter put in charge of the cake shop, only to have the Atkins diet forced upon him at gun point. Chuck into the mix a twelve girl orgy, a stable of alcoholic co-workers, an angry argumentative feminist, a naked run from justice and an obsessive nutty reader who thinks Godfrey is trying to scupper his chances of marrying the magazine's centre-spread girl and you have Danny King's filthiest and funniest novel yet – according to the back of the book. Godfrey Bishop has "the best job in the world" – and it's doing his f*cking head in.

A Very Klingon Khristmas


Paul Ruditis - 2013
    Illustrated in a classic Norman Rockwell–inspired style, A Very Klingon Khristmas is the perfect holiday gift for every Star Trek fan!

Grimoire Bound


Jeff Sproul - 2017
    His memories are clouded, except for images of glass and metal. He quickly finds that he’s not alone in this new realm. There are others who all arrived just as he did. In this strange world, people are driven by survival against forces that have little interest in continued human existence. But through the use of special tomes known as 'grimoires,' people are able to enhance themselves to increase their abilities and 'life properties,' giving them a fighting chance against the monsters that surround them. Without a chance to acclimate himself, Chaxin is thrown into a bloody confrontation with monsters born of nightmares. He soon realizes that one false step could mean his death. But death isn’t the worst that the Graymos has to offer. Can he survive in such an unforgiving world? If not, more than just his life could be at stake. Grimoire Bound is a LitRPG-Lite novel, inspired by Dark Souls, Lovecraft and Grimgar of Fantasy and Ash.