Dear Nobody: The True Diary of Mary Rose


Gillian McCain - 2014
    But Dear Nobody is a true teen diary so raw and so edgy its authenticity rings off every page"I am a freak."The words and drawings of Mary Rose present a gritty, powerful, no-holds-barred true experience of a teen girl so desperate to be loved, so eager to fit in that she'll go to extremes that could cost her her life.This is not a story about addiction. Or sexual promiscuity. Or cystic fibrosis. It's the story of a young woman with a powerful will to live, who more than anything wants to be heard...and loved.This compelling, emotional account ensures her voice will not be forgotten.

Painkiller Addict: From wreckage to redemption - my true story


Cathryn Kemp - 2012
    Cathryn Kemp was a successful travel journalist who was struck down by a life-threatening illness, pancreatitis. After four years of operations and mis-diagnoses she left hospital with a repeat prescription for fentanyl, a painkiller 100 times stronger than heroin. Within two years she was taking more than ten times the NHS maximum, all on prescription. Her family struggled to understand; her boyfriend left her, she hit rock bottom. Discovering she had only six months to live if she didn't give up the drugs she sold everything she owned and checked into rehab. In the addiction treatment centre she was told that she was unlikely to recover from 'the highest level of opiate-abuse in the clinic's history'. To everyone's amazement, she proved them wrong. This is an extraordinarily poignant, vivid and honest memoir. Based on the twenty-four diaries that the author kept during this period, we travel with Cathryn through her hospital agony, descend with her into the hell of addiction and cheer her as she pulls herself out and upwards. It is a love story, a horror story, a survival story, and one that shows only too clearly the very real dangers of the over-prescription of painkillers and tranquillisers. There is also a resource section for sufferers and their loved ones.

Needle


Craig Jordan Goodman - 2012
    Sometimes, I wish it wasn't. Regardless, in many ways I still can't believe it actually happened. After all, I’d graduated from a prestigious university, was reared in an affluent home and knew that drugs were for losers. In fact, I’m not even sure when the metamorphosis occurred—when I made the official leap from struggling musician to struggling junky—but it was definitely before I first stuck myself with a needle and began selling liquor camouflaged in fruit juice to underage children of the rich and famous. Of course, that was merely the tip of the illicit iceberg as so much remains hidden in that shadowy world where dope dealers pose as sales associates in drug fronts disguised as clothing boutiques, and chemically dependent cabbies provide shuttle services to junkies on a quest for the perfect fix. But certainly, the veil of deception would eventually be torn away when I was banished to that awful place, that asylum for the wretched, where another horrific decision would seal my fate with the watery wreckage of an international tragedy.***Profits from NEEDLE will be used to eliminate animal cruelty and improve the lives of homeless pets.***

Dying to Survive: Surviving Drug Addiction


Rachael Keogh - 2009
    Her addiction to the drug took her to a place about as low as a person can go. She stole and turned to prostitution to help her feed her habit. Rachel had grown up in Ballymun and had, like many others, succumbed to the lure of drugs during her teenage years. This is Rachael Keogh’s own story written in her own words. She is now thirty, a student of psychotherapy, an attractive and optimistic young woman. Her story is a remarkable account of recovery from the very edge of personal destruction. It is a heart-lifting story of human redemption.

Lucy in the Sky


Anonymous - 2012
    She lived in an upper middle class neighborhood in Santa Monica with her mom, dad, and Berkeley-bound older brother. She was a good girl, living a good life...but one party changed everything. One party, where she took one taste—and liked it. Really liked it.Social drinking and drugging lead to more, faster, harder... She convinced herself that she was no different from anyone else who liked to party. But the evidence indicates otherwise: Soon she was she hanging out with an edgy crowd, blowing off school and everything she used to care about, all to find her next high.But what goes up must come down, and everything—from her first swig, to her last breath—is chronicled in the diary she left behind.

The Average American Male


Chad Kultgen - 2007
    I suspect it may be both.” --Toby Young, New York Times bestselling author of How to Lose Friends and Alienate PeopleAn offensive, in-your-face, brutally honest and completely hilarious look at male inner life and sexual fantasy. In the course of this hilariously honest book, our narrator suffers through a relationship with his vapid wannabe-actress girlfriend until he finds the perfect girl. But when he moves into the new relationship, he slowly learns that all women are pretty much the same, that man's true desires will never be fulfilled, and the decision between living life alone or biting the marriage bullet must be made.

Cherry


Nico Walker - 2018
    A young man is just a college freshman when he meets Emily. They share a passion for Edward Albee and ecstasy and fall hard and fast in love. But soon Emily has to move home to Elba, New York, and he flunks out of school and joins the army. Desperate to keep their relationship alive, they marry before he ships out to Iraq. But as an army medic, he is unprepared for the grisly reality that awaits him. His fellow soldiers smoke; they huff computer duster; they take painkillers; they watch porn. And many of them die. He and Emily try to make their long-distance marriage work, but when he returns from Iraq, his PTSD is profound, and the drugs on the street have changed. The opioid crisis is beginning to swallow up the Midwest. Soon he is hooked on heroin, and so is Emily. They attempt a normal life, but with their money drying up, he turns to the one thing he thinks he could be really good at – robbing banks.Hammered out on a prison typewriter, Cherry marks the arrival of a raw, bleakly hilarious, and surprisingly poignant voice straight from the dark heart of America.

Dopefiend


Donald Goines - 1971
    It started while he was doing military service in Korea and ended with his murder at the age of thirty nine. He had worked up to a hundred dollars a day habit and out of the agonizing hell came Dopefiend. It is the shocking nightmare story of a black heroin addict. Trapped in the festering sore of a major American ghetto, a young man and his girlfriend- both handsome, talented, and full of promise- are inexorably pulled into death of the hardcore junkie!

The Contortionist's Handbook


Craig Clevenger - 2002
    In the face of his impending institutionalization, he continually reinvents himself to escape the legal and mental health authorities and to save himself from a life of incarceration. But running turns out to be costly. Vincent's clients in the L.A. underworld lose patience, the hospital evaluator may not be fooled by his story, and the only person in as much danger as himself is the woman who knows his real name.

Kiss Me, Judas


Will Christopher Baer - 1998
    Red dress, black hair, body like a knife. He takes her back to his room and wakes the next morning in a bathtub full of blood and ice, missing a kidney.Dragging himself from a hospital bed, Phineas discovers he wants to be with Jude like a hunger -- and he wants to find her and kill her. Falling for her is the start of a twisted love story that takes him from the snowy streets of Denver to the high plains of Texas where the boundaries between torturer and victim, killer and accomplice, become nightmarishly distorted.

Wasting Talent


Ryan Leone - 2014
    His music could have made Damien Cantwell the star of his generation.But living fast has its consequences, and Damien soon finds himself spiraling into a dark world full of unfettered debauchery and brutal violence.The horrors of drug addiction are painted in sharp, biting prose in this novel about throwing away everything and finding that some things are too precious to lose

Bad Sex on Speed


Jerry Stahl - 2013
    Told with no concession to traditional narrative, in the voices of those in the grips and on the fringes, the stories that emerge are at once devastating, hysterical, and—perhaps most terrifying of all—going on all around you, all the time. Stahl digs deep into the psyche of the most demented and dispossessed among us, returning with a vision so unsparing that those not prepared to experience the screaming depths of speed psychosis up close and on the page should back slowly away and return to their lives unscathed.

And I Don't Want to Live This Life: A Mother's Story of Her Daughter's Murder


Deborah Spungen - 1983
    But for Deborah Spungen, the mother of Nancy, who was stabbed to death at the Chelsea Hotel, it was both a relief and a tragedy. Here is the incredible story of an infant who never stopped screaming, a toddler who attacked people, a teenager addicted to drugs, violence, and easy sex, a daughter completely out of control--who almost destroyed her parents' marriage and the happiness of the rest of her family.

The Taste of Cigarettes: A Memoir of a Heroin Addict


Jon Vreeland - 2018
     After three decades of living in the sandy suburbs of Huntington Beach, Jon Vreeland’s heroin addiction has finally destroyed his once promising music career, and estranged him from his wife and his two daughters. Now Vreeland broods over his daughter’s absence while living in his old, broken-down tour van. He and Zooey Leigh—his brand new lover and longtime junkie—sell and shoot heroin in the van. They move from place to place, from crime to crime, and rob the undeserving in a brazen attempt to escape their hypodermic reality. No matter where they go or who they stay with, they always circle back to the shores of Huntington Beach, where the dark nights are their lonely playground. But Jon isn’t meant for this life. He wants nothing more than to rid himself of this nightmare, and return to his estranged family and career. This is the story of how he began to get out.

My Own Worst Enemy: A Memoir of Addiction


Ronnie Steele - 2011
    Here is the story of a man who has done both with equal passion and despair. Join him on a journey as he finds himself lost in the deepest throes of substance abuse and later scaling the mountain that is recovery. My Own Worst Enemy offers a harrowing look at the very face of drug and alcohol addiction and the glory that accompanies one addict's vindication. Ronnie shares with the reader his most intimate trials and victories, from a childhood of abuse to the birth of his first child. At once painful and beautiful, his story is a testament to the strength and enlightenment that comes with sobriety and gives hope to those still struggling that they, too, can find freedom from addiction.