A collection of 45 ridiculous 911 emergency calls, submitted by 911 Call Center Operators across the U.S.Dedicated to you, the Taxpayer who funded these calls.Note: A quick 10-minute read of humorous quotes from real calls.Just enough for a grin of the day!

    He has proudly told "dick jokes for cash" in pretty much every comedy club and festival in Australia, and taken his knob gags international at all the major festivals from Edinburgh to Auckland to Montreal, and graced some of the most famous stages in the world in New York and LA.In 2008 Wil was named GQ's Comedic Talent of the Year, and given an excellent trophy which he immediately misplaced while drunk at the after party.

    She taught her family how to read Scott’s medical chart and to ask pointed questions, no longer leaving his care to the medical professionals who had overdosed him with drugs to the very brink of death in less than three days.“Jo, you have to tell people what they’ve done to me. You have to tell them!”pleaded her little brother, as he lay writhing in agony.In “For the Love of Scott!”, the author recollects her family’s poignant story of love, bewilderment, and lingering frustration when faced with catastrophic medical mistakes. Read the experiences of Scott Hamilton’s family members as they struggle through a storm of horrific medical errors that could have been prevented and recognize what you need to do when someone you love is faced with life-threatening circumstances created by health experts.It took Jo 27 years to put this heartbreaking event down on paper. Writing opened old wounds and required hours of research and documentation. It forced her family to relive a chapter in their own lives that they desperately wanted closed. Yet, they rallied together to help Jo with her mission to keep that promise.To help further her goals, Jo Hamilton will be donating a portion of the proceeds from the sale of her book, to the 1984 Olympic Gold Medal Winner, Scott Hamilton's foundation, The Scott Hamilton CARES Initiative. The Scott Hamilton CARES Initiative was created to help with cancer research, support cancer patients and their families, and find a cure cancer.

    Betrayed by his employer and left for dead, Kovac decides to lie low in Tokyo.His plan? Revenge...But when a young woman asks him to protect her from the yakuza, Kovac feels duty-bound to help. She’s a victim of abuse, and long experience tells him if he doesn’t step in tonight she’ll be a corpse before dawn.As Kovac works to uncover the truth of his last job, he finds himself drawn into a conspiracy which goes well beyond the yakuza to a new and terrifying multinational cartel. One that will stop at nothing to control the global drug trade.The kingpins are certain they’ve covered all bases. They're well-funded and utterly ruthless. But they’ve failed to account for one man – John Kovac.SHADOW KILL is the first in a fast-paced, unflinching thriller series that won't in any way shortchange you on action. Perfect for fans of Lee Child, Mark Greaney and Mark Dawson.

    Having moved to the American Frontier to escape his life as a political pawn for his family, he is content. Everything changes when he receives a letter from his father explaining that he is to marry one Elizabeth “Piper” Renwick. During their trip from Boston to Detroit, Jack learns what it means to be in love while dealing with bankers, a heist, and ultimately Piper- a woman capable of outwitting him at every turn. Will their adventure together on the frontier draw the two of them together or force them apart?

    Mae was NOT what he had in mind when he asked four elderly women to pray for him in hiring his first employee. She was just the kind of lure he didn’t need in his fishing store.

    Four Best-selling authors of Christian romance bring you heartwarming stories filled with holiday cheer and romance under the mistletoe. A Hope Valley Christmas by Belle Calhoune. Mallory Jefferson has returned to her hometown of Hope Valley to spend Christmas with her family. Having been let go from her teaching position and ending things with her boyfriend, Mallory is a bit adrift. When she runs into her high school crush, Colton James, Mallory is embarrassed about her attempts to win his heart back in the day. When Colton asks her to pretend to be his girlfriend to make his dying grandfather happy, Mallory finds herself impulsively saying yes. Colton James is a rancher who dreams of settling down and living out his dreams. When he runs into Mallory, Colton can’t believe how much she’s changed. When she agrees to be his pretend girlfriend, Colton is shocked to discover that his feelings for her are way deeper than he’d ever imagined possible. Can something pretend turn into something real just in time for a very Merry Christmas? Sugarplums and Second Chances by Jill Kemerer. Former NFL star, Chase McGill, invites his teammate's widow, Courtney Trudesta, to spend Christmas in his guest cottage after her mother dies. Courtney faithfully wrote him letters every week while he was in prison for attempting to avenge the murder of the mother of his son, Wyatt. Chase wants to be there for Courtney the way she was for him. But there's more to Christmas than sugarplums and wishful thinking. If they trust God's plan, they'll have a second chance at happiness...with each other. A Brilliant Christmas by Allie Pleiter. Zoe Walters pours her heart and soul into the community arts center she runs. Her kids could benefit so much from the brilliant talents of animator Nigel Langdon—if he weren’t such a legendary grump. The next six weeks of his artist-in-residency look like they’ll ruin Zoe’s Christmas for sure. And certainly, things get off to a rocky start until Zoe discovers the great big heart—and the deep hurt—Nigel’s been hiding under that crusty exterior. It turns out Nigel can see through to Zoe’s deepest wounds as well. When the arts center is threatened, Nigel and Zoe come together not only to save the organization, but to discover a love and the brilliant Christmas no one ever expected Seashell Santa by Lenora Worth. When high school sweethearts Rick Houston and Willa Kincaid reunite in Key West per a deathbed request, they discover that they didn't really know each other at all. But Christmas in paradise just might bring them together for good this time.

    This collection of short stories is our gift to bring you something positive and joyful with which to end the year.Soldiers stumbling upon mercy and miracles; children sharing gifts of friendship and love; romance finding its way into lonely, war-weary hearts; resistance fighters; spies; families on the home front—all bringing their own ray of hope in the darkest of times.For this holiday season, we offer you this collection of short stories to lift your spirit, and to remember a time when love and the strength of human spirit prevailed.We hope you will enjoy stepping back into the wartime Christmases in these stories with us.

    Until she discovers the dangerous secret he kept from her. One that threatens to ruin their marriage and the stability of a happy home for their two little girls.When his siblings suggest a way to gain back Shannon's love and trust, they embark on a seven-day journey to do so. Can Flynn win back her love before it's too late?Along with their focus on Flynn, the family is also helping plan Cymbeline's wedding to Viktor. Will Emerson Pass's favorite tomboy embrace a traditional wedding with all the trimmings? Her sisters are determined to make sure she does.Join the Barnes family for this bonus novella in the bestselling Emerson Pass Historicals. Christmas joy abounds as the family does what they do best, stick together no matter what happens. Don't miss this surprise holiday gift from USA Today Bestselling author Tess Thompson.

     The very word immediately conjures up images of cackling madmen waving death rays as they rant and rave about their maniacal plot for world domination. But there is more to professional evil - so many questions left unanswered by movies and comic books. What kind of salary do henchmen get? Where do all these super gadgets come from? How come good guys never use the door? One man has the answers. Mike Leon spent months following Baron Hammerspace during his rise from C-list rogue to A-list arch-nemesis of the most powerful heroes on the planet. This is the startling and true story of those events.

    Forced to return to her family in South Florida, a place where she never felt she fit in, Victoria moved into her parents' guest room and reluctantly took a job hostessing at The Bubblegum Kittikat, South Florida's "klassiest" gentlemen's club. This hilarious memoir recounts how working in a strip club helped her recover from her breakup while giving her life and herself a much needed makeover. Amateur Night at the Bubblegum Kittikat demonstrates what miracles can happen when you stop judging yourself and others and step far out of your comfort zone (in five inch Lucite heels).

    To get away and relax with friends, forget everything happened, get her life back on track.A stop to seek shelter from a passing storm changes everything. With the weather too intense to continue travel, they pull their Jeep up to the only home around in hopes that the farmhouse's owner would let them rest awhile until the tornado warning passes and the winds and rain have settled. But when the owner of the property answers the door with a shotgun aimed to fire and orders them inside, Samantha can only watch, unseen, as her friends are taken inside to meet an unknown fate.As the only hope for her friends getting out alive, Samantha must figure out what to do, and do it soon. The storm is only getting worse.CALM BEFORE THE STORM is a suspense thriller, a fast-paced journey of horror for a dark and stormy night.

    Foreword by Air Marshal Cliff Spink CB CBE FCMI FRAeS RAF Ret’d. After Amazon charges @£1.60 will go to the Charities When Ian Cowie, Dim Jones and Chris Long set out to produce a compendium of stories of flying in the Royal Air force – Out of the Blue – I doubt they could have anticipated what a successful venture it would be and one that has raised many thousands of pounds for service charities. Well, quite simply, they have done it again. Volume 2 contains another heady mixture of true stories that range from the amazing to the downright scary – all told with a sense of humour that was, and is, the hallmark of that band of people who have had the privilege to fly in the military arena. When I meet friends who shared the same thrills – and spills – of flying high performance aircraft close to the limits in order to get the job done, I think there is common theme to our nostalgia. And that is the “banter” – that irrepressible no holds barred, adrenaline fuelled, exchange between comrades in arms where there is no hiding from even the minor transgression. It is something we all miss but sometimes relive when reunions gather together somewhat greyer and more portly individuals than we were in days of yore. You can now share in these stories in this book which will I am sure give you a fascinating and most amusing insight into flying life in the Royal Air Force. I commend this book to you and please remember that the proceeds go to the charities that support service men and women, and their families, who have given so much for their country. Fasten your seat belts......! Amount going to charity £3.32/$5.43 (at current rate)

    Join Leigh Butler as she summarizes the chapters and comments on the ongoing mysteries of the series, gender issues, politics, history, and the many Crowning Moments of Awesome.Volume 1 of the collected Tor.com Wheel of Time Reread covers books 1 through 4 of The Wheel of Time: The Eye of the World, The Great Hunt, The Dragon Reborn, and The Shadow Rising.

    A family’s legacy can live on, an artist can continue painting his perfection, and local ghost stories may be more than tall tales. Harper weaves stories of love and loss, hopes and horrors, that question the true meaning of “forever.”