As we all know, true creativity comes from simple formulas and the memorization of data. This new bible makes the secrets of comedy accessible, not only to those funny few among us, but also to those who might not have the ability or talent to be funny. One no longer need worry about originality — just find the right comedy number and apply as needed... and then you're on your way to POPULARITYVILLE!© Comedy by the Numbers is a NEARLY comprehensive list of all comedy characters, bits, scenarios, sketches, skits, shtick, and much more. (We say nearly because we want to leave room for Volume 2.) Included are special hints, tips, and unboring comedy history. Comedy by the Numbers is the brainchild of Prof. Eric Hoffman (Mr. Show) and Dr. Gary Rudoren (Annoyance Theatre) — AND features loads of comedy fun facts that you can memorize and use to impress people at parties!

    Meet Bridget and Joan: Thelma and Louise on mobility scooters, reluctant residents of the Second Best Magnolia Retirement Home, and lifelong friends joined at the artificial hip.It’s been a wild year for the two rebellious wrinkletons: sherry and shoplifting, Sanatogen and sexting, and a mysterious toy boy who threatens their lifelong friendship and possibly even more…

    Her distinguished career ended under a cloud over a decade earlier, following an unspecified scandal involving a much younger male teacher. After losing her savings in the financial crash, she is forced to sell the dream house she had built for her old age and live on in her dilapidated cottage opposite. Initially extremely resentful and hostile towards Frank and Evelyn, the young couple who buy the new house, she develops a flirtatious friendship with Frank, and then a grudging affinity for his 12-year-old niece, Kim, who lives with them. Thea has never liked children, but she discovers an unexpected bond with  the solitary, half-Vietnamese Kim, an awkward, bookish child from a very deprived background. As Thea and Kim become close, Thea begins to find  Frank's behavior increasingly irresponsible, and to harbor worries that all is not well in the house. Her growing suspicions, which may or may not be irrational, start to dominate her life, and build to a catastrophic climax.

    Purchase includes a free trial membership in the publisher's book club where you can select from more than a million books without charge. Chapters: First Among Sequels, the Eyre Affair, Lost in a Good Book, the Well of Lost Plots, Something Rotten, the Big Over Easy, the Fourth Bear, Shades of Grey 1: the Road to High Saffron. Source: Wikipedia. Free updates online. Not illustrated. Excerpt: First Among Sequels is an alternate history, comic fantasy novel by the British author Jasper Fforde. It is the fifth Thursday Next novel, first published on 5 July 2007 in the UK, and on 24 July 2007 in the USA. The novel follows the continuing adventures of Thursday Next in her fictional version of Swindon and in the BookWorld, and is the first of a new four-part Nextian series. The title was originally announced, at the end of Fforde's novel The Fourth Bear, as The War of the Words. In order to save the future, undercover SpecOps investigator Thursday Next attempts to convince her son Friday to join the ChronoGuard. To complicate matters, she'll have to deal with renegade apprentices, ruthless corporations, and a sting operation from the Cheese Enforcement Agency. The title First Among Sequels was met with stiff resistance from Fforde's publishers because it had 'sequel' in the title, and it was felt that telegraphing the 'sequelness' of the book might be a bad move. It was decided, however, to capitalise on the fact that this was a series - a sort of 'Have you discovered Thursday Next yet?' approach to marketing. First Among Sequels is the first part of a new four-part Thursday Next series, which is reported to be continued with One of our Thursdays is Missing in 2009. The title is a parody of First Among Equals, which is the title of a best-selling Jeffrey Archer novel, but also comes from the English translation of the Latin phrase primus inter pares. It is traditionally used to describe the position...More: http: //booksllc.net/?id=602795

    Lover. Bon viviant. Cad. Ross O'Carroll-Kelly is many things to many people. But 10 years after he lifted the Leinster Schools Senior Cup, Ireland's most beloved rogue remains one of its most misunderstood figures.

    every morning, feverishly hot, her heart racing and mind whirring with every worst-case scenario imaginable. She's snappy, exhausted and has developed an alarming inability to remember simple nouns.When a friend has the audacity to suggest that forty-five-year-old landscape gardener Eliza Hamilton is hurtling toward menopause, she is naturally appalled. Menopause is something that happens to other women, older women.As Eliza tries to negotiate this new and confusing landscape, she also embarks on the biggest challenge of her career so far. But she soon discovers that juggling erratic mood swings with motherhood, demanding family members and domestic drudgery is far from the harmonious scenario she'd envisaged.If Eliza wants to embrace midlife without the crisis, she must first make some grown up choices and face some uncomfortable truths.Hilarious, gritty and brutally honest, Overgrown will have you laughing, crying and rooting for its quirky yet relatable characters. A much-needed novel every woman approaching midlife should read.

    The book also includes some of her best fiction pieces.

    Sally De Rooze is almost thirty. She survived the accident that killed her father and brothers. Her mother never forgave her for that. But she survived her mother too. Surviving is what she does best. Farmer Ross Bertram, who offers her his acres and safety, is the answer for a while. Until he starts pushing for a wedding. Sally wants ... wants more. Wants to know great love. Wants to find herself. One year. That's what she wants. One year of freedom in the big, bad city. Her survival skills are tested in the urban sprawl and she discovers more about herself than she had ever dared to imagined.

    He wrote more than sixty novels, including the classic Riders of the Purple Sage, but he also produced some of the finest Western short fiction ever written. The stories collected here are shining examples of his best. Included in this volume is "The Ranger," first published in 1929 but never before in the form Grey himself intended. Here is a rare opportunity to experience the short stories of Zane Grey, restored and correct to the original vision, a vision that has remained unmatched for nearly a century!

    She is always the first on the dancefloor and the very last to stop boogying. She has never tried to dress like a Parisian, never followed advice on what not to wear, and certainly has never tried to tone down her natural pinkness; she knows he is perfect just the way she is. And even when life throws Flamingo a curveball, she is always ready to embrace the unknown and jump straight in.A gorgeous little gift book of motivational sayings and hilarious axioms, Be a Flamingo is a perfect pink pick-me-up gift for a friend who needs a confidence boost, or great as an impulse self-purchase when you feel you need to start tooting your own horn a little louder. Because we could all do worse than taking a leaf out of Flamingo's book.

    She is addicted to the feeling of being on stage, looking out at expectant, up-turned mouths, waiting for the first laugh to hit. A first laugh that will not happen unless she creates it. But Brenda is clueless. The on-off girlfriend of a prolific comedian, it is only after she realises his best stage material consists of recycled versions of her own restless, smart-arsed energy that she begins to wonder whether she might be better off keeping her jokes for herself - and so she finds herself making her very first walk to the mark on stage in front of a bare brick wall, with just a spotlight and a PA system for cover, wondering what we all wonder from time to time: am I funny? A book as much about the thrill of performance as it is about what goes on when the microphone is switched off, Brenda Monk is Funny is a blackly humourous and devastatingly candid snapshot of the reality, the brutality and fragility of the comedy industry from an exciting new voice in fiction.

    The raynids prey on humans as a food source, swarming through the universe like locusts from a nightmare. A small band of survivors of the distant planet of Gaviron hunt the monsters but they’re slowly losing the war. Biron, highly-trained and gifted warrior of Gaviron, reluctantly agrees to a last desperate strategy. The goal isn’t to defeat the raynids but to make sure a few small pockets of humanity survive. To do his part, Biron takes on the role of protector on the small Earthling colony of Blithe. In exchange, the people of Blithe must offer up one of their women as Biron’s bride so that a small piece of Gaviron will live on. Heartbroken by the years of fighting the raynids and losing everyone he’s loved, Biron doesn’t care who he marries. Esta Brunner, intelligent, brave and attractive, makes as good a choice as anyone. Esta agrees to the terms of their Gaviron saviors. And as she and Biron fight against their common foe, her alien husband’s easy charm and physical beauty ease the discomfort of the forced marriage. Their fledging relationship comforts them both until another danger intrudes on the planet. Once the fragile trust between them is broken, Esta realizes how much she’s come to care for her lonely husband. It will take Esta’s clever mind and Biron’s knowledge and skills together to defeat the raynids. Before they can trust each other again, Esta must accept the depth of her love for her husband and Biron must learn what love is. Other titles available by Susan Kelley through New Concepts Publishing: Recon Marines I: The Marine's Queen Recon Marines II: The Marine's Heiress Recon Marines III: The Marine's Doctor The Greater Good The Lesser Evil A Ruthless Good One Good Woman Book I: To Tame a Tiger Book II:Tiger's Mate Book III :A Tiger's Courage The Warrior and the Biologist Coming Soon to Amazon: The Warrior and the Governor (Now Available for Pre-Order) If you enjoyed this book, be sure to check out these other exciting titles available from New Concepts Publishing: The Men of Anderas I: Jardan, the King by C.J. Johnson The Men of Anderas II: Dak the Protector by C.J. Johnson The Men of Anderas III: Talon, the Assassin by C.J. Johnson Watchers by Kaitlyn O'Connor Dragons of the Dawn by Kaitlyn O'Connor Centaur Chronicles: Unbridled by Raven Willow-Wood The Forgotten Realms: Primal Instincts by Raven Willow-Wood Love's Captive by Myra Nour

    What seems like a good deed however has a cruel payback andin a single moment, Kamran loses everything dear to him. This is whenMirza, in gratitude, takes Kamran under his wing and the young man getsdrawn into the mafia boss’s dangerous world of cops and rival gangsters,eventually taking over from him.Kamran also inherits Mirza’s philosophy that all of life’s problems can besolved through Ghalib¹s poetry.Soon, the innocent taxi driver has cops, criminals and even cabinetministers at his beck and call.And he has a new name—Ghalib Danger.

    Mel Winterbourne is the founder of a small, single-issue charity in the obscure field of mapmaking. Its success in achieving modest aims attracts the attention of handsome tech billionaire Joey Talavera, who evicts Mel and hijacks her charity for his own ends: to convince the world that the earth is flat. Although his chances of doing so seem slim, Flat Earthery is an idea whose time has come. With the historical reputation of Christopher Columbus in free-fall, old-style ‘globularism’ becomes heretical for a new generation of angry, anti-Establishment free-thinkers. Teachers, politicians, and celebrities face ruin if they refuse to sign up to the new orthodoxy. For Mel, something must be done. Teaming up with a pariah tabloid journalist and a faded writer of gross-out movie comedies, she sets out to challenge Talavera and his deranged beliefs. Will history and the billionaire’s own family origins be their unexpected ally? Using his trademark mix of history and satire to poke fun at modern foibles, Simon Edge is at his razor-sharp best in a caper that may be much more relevant than you think.

    He is grieving for the loss of his wife when the tunnel collapses and traps the bus inside. In the darkness that follows, he manages to fumble out of the bus with the only other survivor, an astute and gentle woman who reminds him of his late wife. Without any light to guide them and with only each other to depend on, they try to escape the stifling darkness and along the way find themselves confronted by their pasts and given their last chance at intimacy, and ultimately, absolution.A realist story that plays with surreal elements, the tale poses a simple question: what is the meaning of hope?