101 hilarious and dirty jokes for adults.

    The story “Knock Knock” is about a boy who grows up with his dad always telling these horrible jokes.

     Part of the Storycuts series, this short story was previously published in the collection If You Liked School, You'll Love Work.

    They've been having some serious problems with the white stuff—not snow, but cocaine—and their highly-paid, isolated, somewhat stir-crazy employees have been overdosing at an alarming rate. Kate's job is to identify the dealer and staunch the flow before more people die. It's never that simple, of course.In Play with Fire, Kate and friends stumble across a naked, decaying corpse in the woods. Judged death by misadventure by the Troopers, Kate's sense of justice demands that she launch her own investigation, leading her to ask some very uncomfortable questions of a frontier faith community. Questions that might drive someone to kill…again.In Blood Will Tell, Kate is forced to involve herself in Native politics, attending the annual Federation convention in Anchorage and investigating the deaths of several board members. Opposition to a new development project seems to have been the link tying the victims together, but when Kate poses the question that all detective work begins with—cui bono?—she finds there are more suspects on the list than not.Also included: the two Kate Shugak short stories, "Wreck Rights" and "Cherchez la Femme."

    Legend fades to myth, and even myth is long forgotten when the Age that gave it birth returns again. In the Third Age, an Age of Prophecy, the World and Time themselves hang in the balance. What was, what will be, and what is, may yet fall under the Shadow.The Eye of the World — When The Two Rivers is attacked by Trollocs—a savage tribe of half-men, half-beasts— five villagers flee that night into a world they barely imagined, with new dangers waiting in the shadows and in the light.The Great Hunt — Long thought only legend, the Horn of Valere is found, a mystical item able to raise the dead heroes of the ages. But then, everything changes when it gets stolen.The Dragon Reborn — Winter has stopped the war—almost—yet men are dying, calling out for the Dragon. But where is he? In the Heart of the Stone lies the next great test of the Dragon reborn.The Shadow Rising — The seals of Shayol Ghul are weak now, and the Dark One reaches out. The Shadow is rising to cover humankind. Against the Shadow rising stands the Dragon Reborn.The Wheel of Time®New Spring: The Novel#1 The Eye of the World#2 The Great Hunt#3 The Dragon Reborn#4 The Shadow Rising#5 The Fires of Heaven#6 Lord of Chaos#7 A Crown of Swords#8 The Path of Daggers#9 Winter's Heart#10 Crossroads of Twilight#11 Knife of DreamsBy Robert Jordan and Brandon Sanderson#12 The Gathering Storm#13 Towers of Midnight#14 A Memory of Light By Robert Jordan and Teresa Patterson The World of Robert Jordan's The Wheel of Time By Robert Jordan, Harriet McDougal, Alan Romanczuk, and Maria Simons The Wheel of Time Companion By Robert Jordan and Amy Romanczuk Patterns of the Wheel: Coloring Art Based on Robert Jordan's The Wheel of Time At the Publisher's request, this title is being sold without Digital Rights Management Software (DRM) applied.

    Wild magic, unexpected allies, a conflagration of sorcery and shifter magic the likes of which has not been seen in centuries... That's what awaits the peaceful town of Grizzly Cove. That, and love...lots and lots of love. This anthology contains books 4 thru 6 of the Grizzly Cove series. Book 4 is novel-length, while books 5 and 6 are slightly shorter. The titles are: Alpha Bear What’s a bear to do when he learns the woman he wants is a witch, and already knows he’s a shifter? Can a town full of bear shifters deal with having a mage in their midst? And when evil attacks from the sea, can they afford not to have a witch willing to give of herself to protect them? Or will the Alpha have to give up Grizzly Cove in order to keep the woman he loves? Saving Grace Jack never expected to find a badly injured mermaid washed up on shore. Grace never expected to live through her encounter with the leviathan. When she wakes up in Jack’s care, she finds herself drawn to the handsome grizzly shifter, though the sea, and the leviathan, calls to her. Can she resist the allure of the ocean? Can she stay with her bear, on land, or will she break both their hearts? Bearliest Catch Drew spends his days fishing in the Pacific, far from Grizzly Cove, seeking the peace of the ocean. Jetty lives in the ocean, part of a hunting party of mer folk, in near-constant danger now from the evil creature that roams the deep. When they meet, sparks fly and the ocean comes alive with danger. Can they get her people to safety?

    But when her own five-year-old son, Nathaniel, is traumatized by a sexual assault, Nina and her husband, Caleb, a quiet and methodical stone mason, are shattered, ripped apart by an enraging sense of helplessness in the face of a futile justice system that Nina knows all too well. In a heartbeat, Nina's absolute truths and convictions are turned upside down, and she hurtles toward a plan to exact her own justice for her son—no matter the consequence, whatever the sacrifice. Second GlanceSecond Glance, an eerie and engrossing work, delves into a virtually unknown chapter of American history—Vermont's eugenics project of the 1920s and 30s—to provide a compelling study of the things that come back to haunt us—literally and figuratively. Do we love across time, or in spite of it? My Sister's KeeperMy Sister's Keeper examines what it means to be a good parent, a good sister, a good person. Is it morally correct to do whatever it takes to save a child's life, even if that means infringing upon the rights of another? Is it worth trying to discover who you really are, if that quest makes you like yourself less? Should you follow your own heart, or let others lead you? Once again, Jodi Picoult tackles a controversial real-life subject with grace, wisdom, and sensitivity.

    R. MartinFitz has succeeded in rescuing Prince Dutiful from the clutches of the Piebald rebels, and has returned with him to Buckkeep castle. With Dutiful safe again, Queen Kettricken can proceed with plans to marry him to the Outislander princess, Elliania.However, with tensions building among the peoples of the Six Duchies over Kettricken’s tolerance of the Wittted, even Buckkeep is no longer safe. A reluctant Fitz is assigned to protect the young prince, and also train him in the Skill, and in doing so he finally makes contact not only with his estranged daughter, Nettle, but with someone in Buckkeep who may possess a greater Skill talent even than Fitz. And who may represent a terrible threat to the Farseers.Continue the adventure with books two and three of Robin Hobb’s enchanting Tawny Man Trilogy.Bundle includes The Golden Fool (book two) and The Fool’s Fate (book three).

    SpaceshipPiper in the Woods

    On that afternoon, her husband of ten years crash-landed his malfunctioning single-engine plane in Murfreesboro, Tennessee. Dr. Darrell Swank suffered multiple fractures, and third degree burns over sixty percent of his body when the gas tank exploded as he crawled away from the wreckage. Over the next five weeks, she struggled to be a mother to their children while she kept a near round-the-clock vigil at the hospital. Darrell’s survival was questionable from one day to the next, and even if he survived, would he be the same man he was before the crash? Did his fate depend on this test of her faith?The Death of Me is the true story of a wife and mother living day to day through a fog of shock and unimaginable agony. And, alone in the aftermath, fumbling for some way to not only survive, but to thrive. It is a story of pain, of release, of forgiveness. And of healing, resilience, and rebirth. It is a story of a writer finding her voice.

    A collection of science fiction stories written by acclaimed author Poul Anderson.Poul Anderson is best known for sci-fi adventure stories in which larger-than-life characters succeed gleefully or fail heroically. Anderson's also famous for writing 'Call Me Joe' (not included in this volume) which featured the premise of a paralyzed man whose mind is remotely controlling an alien body. This same theme also appears in James Cameron's 2009 movie "Avatar" – similar enough that some reviewers are calling for Anderson to receive some form of credit.Included in this volume:Story One: Duel on SyrtisBold and ruthless, he was famed throughout the System as a big-game hunter. From the firedrakes of Mercury to the ice-crawlers of Pluto, he'd slain them all. But his trophy-room lacked one item; and now Riordan swore he'd bag the forbidden game that roamed the red deserts ... a Martian!Story Two: SecurityIn a world where Security is all-important, nothing can ever be secure. A mountain-climbing vacation may wind up in deep Space. Or loyalty may prove to be high treason. But it has its rewards...Story Three: The Valor of Cappen VarraWe have said that there are many and strange shadows, memories surviving from dim pasts, in this fantastic universe of ours...Story Four: Industrial RevolutionEver think how deadly a thing it is if a machine has amnesia—or how easily it can be arranged…Story Five: The Sensitive ManOne man stood between a power-hungry cabal and world mastery--but a man of unusual talents...These are the original and unabridged versions of these classic science fiction treasures. A must-have for fans of classic sci-fi!

    The tree is decorated, the mistletoe is in place, and the crab puffs are to die for. Nothing can spoil this celebration…except for some wayward magic and a pesky ghost who crashes the party.SPIRITS OF BOURBON STREETIt’s Halloween on Bourbon Street, and white witch Jade Calhoun is ready to party. But when a sexy spirit traps everyone in the past, she’s forced to forgo the cocktails in order to save those she loves...again.A MIRACLE ON BOURBON STREETIt’s Christmas Eve and Jade Calhoun’s ready for a quiet, magical night with her husband Kane. But when Santa demons and energy-stealing elves start wreaking havoc, it’s going to take a miracle on Bourbon Street to save Christmas.A BOURBON STREET VALENTINEIt’s Valentine’s Day and magic’s in the air. Only Kat Hart never expected her handmade jewelry to be at the center of everything. So when her night out at Cupid’s Ball turns into a competition to be a handsome stranger’s wife, it’s up to her to break the spell…or she might get more than she bargained for.SPIRITS, HURRICANES, AND THE KREWE OF GHOULIt’s Halloween and Pyper Rayne’s all vamped up, ready to play the vampire bride. And so is Ida May, her resident ghost. But when the “vampires” they're partying with start to appear to be real, there’s more at stake than just a little bite.KISSED BY TEMPTATIONThe last place sex-witch Mati Ballintine wants to be is at a holiday sorority party. But when the high angel from the council orders her to protect a new angel recruit, she has no choice but to go and grit her teeth through the frat boys’ advances.
The night turns from bad to worse when a demon appears and is hell-bent on taking the angel to Hell. Mati and her incubus boyfriend Vaughn will need to combine forces to not only save the angel, but everyone else the demon leaves in his wake.

    But as a military spouse with her husband on a deployment she’d make the best of it.Between dust storms and unseen enemies, Logan has been reconsidering his life choices. When he’s offered an opportunity to go stateside for an assignment, he jumps at the chance. With the help of his best friend, Alex, he plans a romantic weekend on Sanibel Island.When Logan surprises Chloe with a romantic trip it’s like a dream come true. But instead of being able to enjoy their time together, she’s worried about his reaction when he finds out she’s pregnant. Being the primary parent while he’s in constant danger thousands of miles away is getting old. But will he be willing to give up his military career for his family?Between seashells and sunsets, will their love be able to ride out the storm to find their forever?

    Wilbur Larch—saint and obstetrician, founder and director of the orphanage in the town of St. Cloud's, ether addict and abortionist. It is also the story of Dr. Larch's favorite orphan, Homer Wells, who is never adopted. A Widow for One Year Richly comic, as well as deeply disturbing, A Widow for One Year is a multilayered love story of astonishing emotional force.  Both ribald and erotic, it is also a brilliant novel about the passage of time and the relentlessness of grief. A Prayer for Owen Meany In the summer of 1953, two eleven-year-old boys–best friends–are playing in a Little League baseball game in Gravesend, New Hampshire. One of the boys hits a foul ball that kills the other boy’s mother. The boy who hits the ball doesn’t believe in accidents; Owen Meany believes he is God’s instrument. What happens to Owen, after that 1953 foul ball, is extraordinary and terrifying.

    Now at last, thanks to the tireless efforts of the Klingon Language Institute, this powerful drama by the legendary Klingon playwright, Wil'yam Shex'pir, can be appreciated in the elegance and glory of its original tongue. This invaluable volume contains the complete text of the play, along with an English translation for easy consultation and comparison. In addition, an incisive introduction explains the play's crucial importance in Klingon culture, while copious notes illustrate how the debased English version diverges from the original, often distorting and even reversing the actual meaning of the verses.Khamlet, the Restored Klingon Version, is a work that belongs in the library of every human who hopes truly to understand what it means to be Klingon.