Try, "I was overcome by the urge to alphabetize my pets," or perhaps a simple "Had ninja trouble." Steve has used both these excuses, and here they are hilariously illustrated. He also has claimed to have become temporarily feral, accidentally sold himself on eBay, and gotten stuck in a romantic montage. An illustration of Steve with Darth Vader accompanies the inarguable excuse "I was seduced by the Dark Side." He also gets lost in his duvet, and discovers he has a rather unusual superpower.

    Telling three interconnected stories taking place on the same day, two weeks after events in "The Foul Mouth and the Mancy Martial Artist" this novel is a can't miss for fans of THE KING HENRY TAPES. Spending equal time with Tyson Bonnie, Eva Reti, and King Henry Price himself, KING HENRY AND THE THREE LITTLE TRIPS shows the fallout from the Days of Supernatural Exhibit in both the personal cost for our characters and the political cost for supernatural organizations worldwide as fear of the Curator spreads to even the Asylum itself. Read as Tyson Bonnie escorts Vicky Welf to the Coyote Nation compound, find out if Eva Reti can survive the anima experiment inflicted upon her, and follow King Henry as he returns to the Asylum seeking Plutarch's help. The queue for the "Foul Mouth and the Pit of No Return" roller-coaster begins here! THE KING HENRY TAPES Book 1 - "The Foul Mouth and the Fanged Lady" (released) Book 2 - "The Foul Mouth and the Cat Killing Coyotes" (released) Book 3 - "The Foul Mouth and the Troubled Boomworm" (released) Book 4 - "The Foul Mouth and the Headless Hunny" (released) Book 5 - "The Foul Mouth and the Mancy Martial Artist" (released) Book 5.5 - "King Henry and the Three Little Trips" (released) Book 6 - "The Foul Mouth and the Pit of No Return" (forthcoming)

    And so when she meets and falls in love with Daniel Fallow, son of a successful businessman, she's quick to accept his proposal of his marriage. His family, though, are against the match, and so the young couple marry in secret. Grudging acceptance follows, and as the Depression worsens Daniel is persuaded to join the family business, unaware of his father's dodgy dealings. Tragedy is just around the corner, and worse is to come when war is declared in 1939: as Daniel leaves to fight and her children are evacuated, Hope wonders if she will ever have all her family around her again...

    Do reputations never change?Some people aren't always forever...Taking chances may be reckless, but the prizes can be great. Is love always enough or will the heady temptations of fame prove too much?I don't think I've read anything so gut-wrenching and amazing before' - ReviewerNo Cheating, HEA seriesScroll up and grab it now.

    And for the last of the line of Eld there may be no way out. Meanwhile, on Mid-World, Alain and Cuthbert desperately struggle to protect Roland's unconscious form, and themselves, against a pack of ravening wolves.

     (No previous DEAD CLOWN BARBECUE reading experience required.) This 21,000-word collection contains the first-ever publication of "Gave Up The Ghost," the basis for the horror/comedy short movie directed by Gregory Lamberson, that will appear in the upcoming anthology film CREEPERS. In addition to a report from the movie set, this collection contains... "The Car." A pair of vampires get together for an evening of vicious fun. "The Loneliest Jackalope." Bunnies with antlers! You can't go wrong with bunnies with antlers. "Inside the Boxes." Whatever is in there can't be good... "A Bit of Christmas Mayhem." Andrew Mayhem vs. a trio of axe-wielding Santa Clauses. "Scrumptious Bone Bread." It's not just for giants anymore. "A Flawed Fantasy." Sometimes, two girls at once isn't the best idea. "Tin Cans." What will you hear when you put one to your ear?

    He had a beautiful new girlfriend and sudden prosperity as an author. But when he adopts an orphaned infant mouse, his world is turned on its head. The mouse comes to symbolize everything left unresolved in his life — his relationship with his divorced parents, his fear of family and commitment, and his inability to feel true happiness and love. By turns hilarious and moving, Mishka Shubaly’s latest Kindle Single captures the journey we all take in life — from being loved, to giving love. Cover by Adil Dara.

    Powers, a self-described self-reflection junkie, challenges readers to create a more joyful life by using an easily adapted process outlined in Oh shift! Drawing on her New Jersey upbringing, Powers couples a provocative approach with fearless humor and wit to provide readers with the inspiration to become true shift heads. Powers shares both personal vignettes and client success stories to drive the Oh, shift! message home and to showcase the benefits of shifting in today's world. Chapters aptly titled to fit the Oh, shift! message include: Shift or get off the pot, Why take a shift?, Shift happens, The f'n shift, Let's shoot the shift, Scared shiftless and many more. This is not your everyday self-help book. The title may be funny, but the content is powerfully life-changing. The book utilizes a specially designed layout to emphasize important points and to make it a quick and enjoyable read. It guarantees to get the reader totally shift-faced.

    Originally published by Palliard Press.

    Meet Judge Death, a warped ghoul from a parallel Earth where life itself is a crime. An entire world was judged, found guilty and its citizens executed. Now it's our turn. Judge Death comes to Mega-City One, and somehow Dredd must kill a creature already dead. And if one of these Dark Judges wasn't enough, get ready to meet Fear, Fire and Mortis! Featuring work by fan favourite artist Brian Bolland (Batman: The Killing Joke, Camelot 3000)!

    She wasn’t concerned about what the repercussions might be for her personally, given the circumstances of the situation, but if there was the slightest chance of saving her thirteen year old son, she had little choice but to try. Once the secret was revealed, however, should he refuse to help her, she was ready to become a fugitive on the run if that’s what it took. Delco Whalen’s return from his five-year stint in Italy was long overdue. He missed his family more than he’d thought, and moving back home and surrounding himself with family was what he felt he needed in his life right now to shake off the swell of loneliness that was starting to conquer him. He was older now. Maybe it was the time that he settled down with a woman who would accept him, even with all his flaws, but that was little more than a pipe dream. Just when he thought that his life was coming full circle, he was presented with a secret that would turn his life upside down, not including the promise that he felt obligated as a man who keeps his word to honor, which inadvertently places him in a nightmare of his own choosing.

    And Rain of Gold is possibly his finest work -- a sweeping tableau of family ties and cultural traditions.pA pair of strong families, two proud but embattled lineages, find themselves bound together by time and circumstance. Through political upheavals, loves gained and lives lost, the families struggle to keep what is precious to them. This premise would make a mesmerizing novel -- but this story is all true.p"A great love story...magnificent." (Albuquerque Journal)

    It finally gets the best of her and she does what she had to do to find out what’s going on with her best friend Jean cheering her on even if the idea has her trapped in a closet. They always say if you go looking, you will find and that’s exactly what happened. That fatefully evening Arahn found out Rodney’s deep dark secret that makes her want to swear off men for life. In steps Rasean, allowing her to drop that wall again and teaching her it’s okay to love and trust again as long as it’s the right person. Rasean is her soulmate, they both know it even through they are just friends. When Arahn finally gives into love giving it another chance Rasean does the unthinkable…..

    For so long, he had his mind set on gaining Harlem's trust back, yet she became the one thing he despises the most; a liar. With both of their lives on the line and a new love interest on the scene, Enzo must now be the one to make a choice. Hoping that it can right all his wrongs from the past. From pen pals to secret lovers, Lucci and Yaz find themselves at odds. While locked up, he found solace in their intimate phone conversations and letters. Their bond formed a solid friendship, but now lines are blurred. Though Yaz swore their first sexual encounter would be the last, Lucci proves, unwaveringly, how much pull he has in Yaz' life and her makeshift relationship. While sacrifices are made, are they worth pushing the love Harlem yearned for to the side? The finale of She From The Gutta is a tale of overcoming unfortunate circumstances, burying your past demons, and taking losses because, in the end, they're really a lesson learned. The type of lessons that can only be taught by life's never-ending struggle to survive.

    Clever and funny cartoons makes learning new words fun and entertaining.