The true story of how mildly successful guitarist and New York Times writer Dan Crane relinquished his instrument and became Björn Türoque (pronounced "b-yorn too-RAWK"), the second greatest air guitarist in the nation. This exploration of the international air guitar sub-culture addresses the issue of dedicating oneself to an invisible art in order to achieve the ultimate goal of "airness"-that is, when air guitar transcends the "real" art that it imitates and becomes an art form in and of itself.

    But long before he put on the deputy's star, he grew up in Nigeria, where his experiences were equally unforgettable. In THE LAWDOG FILES: AFRICAN ADVENTURES, LawDog chronicles his encounters with everything from bush pilots, 15-foot pythons, pygmy mongooses, brigadier-captains, and Peace Corp hippies to the Nigerian space program. THE LAWDOG FILES: AFRICAN ADVENTURES are every bit as hilarious as the previous volume, as LawDog relates his unforgettable experiences in a laconic, self-deprecating manner that is funny in its own right. Africa wins again, and again, and again, but, so too does the reader in this sobering, but hilarious collection of true tales from the Dark Continent.

    It’s a world of craziness, lost reservations, the “Master Bait & Tackle Shop”, Pet Jacuzzis, Pompeii pornography, the Electric Chair beauty salon, Cowboy poetry gatherings, strips searches, a Cannabis festival, the “Miss Swamp Buggy” beauty contest, cancelled flights, tattooed Santa, the “Shrub Guy”, an Iranian comic, free dwarf mice, and Hitler’s town car on display in a Las Vegas casino. After reading Ken Levine’s hilarious and instructive excursions, you’ll be on the phone to your travel agent, either booking or canceling your next trip.

    Now, graduating from business school, newly married, Kristin is ready to take the next step of starting a family. But when Kristin’s first pregnancy ends with a miscarriage, she is devastated. When her second pregnancy does as well, Kristin and her husband Bob turn to in vitro fertilization – and are heartbroken again after a third miscarriage. Undaunted, they turn to alternate options, including surrogacy and adoption, but face setbacks at every turn, some so unthinkable that they never could have been predicted. In the most extreme of circumstances, when all of our careful plans are thrown out the window, how do we persevere? In spite of the pain and sorrow of the many years spent trying to start their family, Kristin and Bob remain positive, loving, and driven – and learn in their ultimately rewarding journey that life’s joys come more from the unexpected than from the expected.100% of Kristin Peck’s proceeds from the sale of Perseverance will be donated to Family and Children's Agency.Kristin Peck is thrilled to be the working mother of two amazing children. She keeps herself sane by belting out her favorite pop and country songs while running and completing triathlons, and is proud to have recently completed her first marathon. She is currently EVP, Group President of Zoetis, Inc., the world's largest animal health company. Kristin received her bachelor’s from Georgetown and her MBA from Columbia Business School. Kristin, her husband, two children and their dog live in CT. Perseverance is her first book.Cover design by Hannah Perrine Mode.

    If you enjoyed the first book, I'm sure you'll enjoy this one just as much. This journey starts where The Unknown Mongol "the first book" left off. The year is 1998 and Scott "Junior" Ereckson the National President of the Mongols Motorcycle Club has been convicted of assault with a deadly weapon. Because he's an ex-felon and its his 2nd strike, he' been sentenced to 14 years in state prison. Follow Junior as the unforgiving steel doors of freedom slam behind him. Go with him on this wild rollercoaster ride to hell and back. Experience the in's, out's, ups and downs of Los Angeles County Jail (the closest place to hell on earth), then on to California State Prison. Hold on tight as you share the happiness, sadness, and relationships in this unbelievable but true gripping expedition of one man's life.

    It is isolating, painful, and confusing. Loneliness and longing are your reality. You’re consumed with guilt, self-deprecating inner dialogue, and worst of all, the fear of doing even the smallest thing wrong. You spend a lot of time alone…even when you’re not. You watch a lot of TV.Obviously, this is all your fault. Obviously, the reason you are living this way is because of something you did to warrant it. If they beat you, you deserved it. If they punish you, you asked for it. You never want to go home, but you don’t have a choice because you’ve never had a choice. This is it. This is what you have. This is all you know.And yet, you still smile when you sometimes catch a glimpse of the sweeter things and treasure the smallest kindness. Inside, you know life isn’t supposed to be like this, but it is. Your life is like a bubble of poison gas that could burst at any moment…you know that. You live that. But how are you supposed to make sense of any of this? How do you make it stop?You can’t.You are powerless.You haven’t even reached kindergarten yet.From a severely abusive childhood in the inner city of Baltimore, a string of unsatisfying relationships and several broken marriages, to a six-figure income from the multi-million dollar business I built out of my home, this is my story in my own words.I was stolen as a baby when my mother died. I was lied to by my kidnapper and used as a Cinderella punching bag by his never-ending parade of “step-mothers” and girlfriends, and much worse when he didn’t have one.This memoir covers the good, the bad, and the ugly.As this story unfolds, my hope is that you, the reader, will discover a little girl who survived that abusive childhood, healed, and empowered herself through discipline and hard work. I hope you see a girl who became a woman who learned from her mistakes and a whole human being who loves her newfound family with all her heart.I am no longer an outsider. I can go home now.

    So begins the journey through France of an optimistic, infinitely curious, 62-year-old woman, who seeks to ransom her self-confidence and learn how to age. Deftly weaving scenic description with sketches of feisty Frenchwomen and flashbacks of older women she has admired, Gail draws wisdom from people and places that have gracefully endured the passing years. By the time she reaches the Mediterranean village that once existed only on her calendar, she feels revitalized. Her refreshed self-concept takes a hit, however, when her beloved proves fickle and a train strike maroons her on the edge of the sea. By the end of her journey, Gail recognizes the joie de vivre beneath the wrinkles of bygone beauty in French women. Now she awakens to her own joy of living and finds that it has no expiration date.

    It is a comedic, self-deprecating, look into the harsh, scary, and often sad world of infertility. Hilariously Infertile will make you laugh out loud while wishing you could have a glass of wine with the author and discuss how you relate to her story is. The author pokes fun at the infertility world, with jokes, such as, equating the constant gynecological exams to her sluttiest days in college, and wondering if her husband will be home in time to stick it (the IVF ass shot) into her butt.We follow the author's journey from trying to conceive on her own, discovering she is infertile, getting pregnant, and then doing it all again for her second child. The entire journey is marked with uproarious scenes that any woman who has ever been to the gynecologist can identify with. At times, the author's candor will surely lead the reader to conclude that the outlandish stories cannot be true. But they are, all of them.Included in the journey is a chapter on being a new mom. This chapter is funny and real. It does not boast about being a parent, to those who still may be on that path; rather, it speaks candidly about the adjustment to a new life that the author worked hard to achieve, via fertility treatments, and yet still was not ready for.There is no filter for the author of Hilariously Infertile. This book tells it like it is, from sex, to infertility, to being a mother and a wife. If you have thought it somewhere deep down inside, this book says it aloud.

    

    Entering a world of mysterious powers and nightmarish consequences, Chris realizes the secret belief of every teenage boy- that his wang has the power to change the world. The Monkey's Penis is the third installment in the terrifying Shingles series, and once again readers with weak hearts or bladders are advised to read on at their own risk...

    The Chicago-bred performer and royal king of the Original Kings of Comedy, Bernie Mac, has won over countless fans of cutting comedy and family humor with an edgy show that tells it like it is but never loses heart. No surprise, Mac has earned a reputation as perhaps the truest voice of modern humor. Here, in his debut book, Mac brilliantly captures the R-rated side of his comedic genius in print. Touring through a wide range of topics with equal parts insight and irreverence, Bernie presents a way of looking at the world guaranteed to make you laugh. Tackling superstar athletes, the movie business, his fellow comedians, his marriage, and, of course, his friends and family, Mac offers side-splitting riffs on sex, religion, hygiene, money, and more. Nobody is safe; nothing is sacred. Not even Bernie himself. Throughout I Ain't Scared of You, Mac turns his humor inward, firing off hilarious self-deprecating salvos about his golf game and his own hypocrisies. Bernie Mac's hit show and his vital live performances have earned him critical acclaim and international popularity. Now, I Ain't Scared of You reveals his humor whole—unpretentious, unafraid, and unbelievably funny and raw.

    He interviewed 82 inductees into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame ... 174 recording artists who had at least one No. 1 hit. His interviews were heard daily on radio stations around the globe during much of the late ‘70s and ‘80s, until severe bipolar disorder took full control. In One Brain Cell Left, Rosy doesn’t always paint a rosy picture of the Mega-Stars he interviewed. Some were absolute sweethearts; others were absolute assholes. And they’re not always the ones you’d expect. He’s never asked what he talked about with celebrities. People only want to know what the stars were like in person. This book answers the “What were they like?” questions about a cross-section of superstar entertainers, newsmakers and athletes that Rosy interviewed. But it’s equally about the unique and unusual life that he’s led outside the entertainment industry. He REALLY didn’t want to like Paul McCartney. He found George Harrison to be completely down-to-earth. Unfortunately, he can’t say the same about Ringo. He found Madonna to be “Queen Shit with a muffin top.” Mickey Mantle swore at him. Mel Brooks ran after him. Kareem Abdul-Jabbar intentionally treated him like shit. His first words to Lionel Richie were, “So they tell me you’ve become a real asshole since you’ve gotten all this success.” And you’ll laugh at his self-deprecating chapters “Always wear a cup when you play tennis” and “Free drinks, a blind hockey goalie and a goat.” You’ll likewise be drawn in by the poignant “I’m no Belushi, but I’ve become Joe Cocker” and the riveting “A machine gun and explosives.” His stories aren’t always pretty. But they’re always pretty interesting. And he’s got the brain cell to prove it.

    

    Emerging as one of the most successful performers in her field, Essman goes behind the scenes of a life in comedy with her funny cohorts, including Joy Behar, Rodney Dangerfield, and, of course, Jeff Garlin and Larry David, while also providing sidesplittingly funny wisdom on a range of topics that she's highly unqualified to expound upon, including men, sports, hypochondria, and stepparenthood.WHAT WOULD SUSIE SAY ABOUT...MARRIAGE?"It took me a long time to find the man I was willing to commit myself to. Even the word commit is troublesome. One is committed to a mental institution."MEN WITH DOGS?"As a dog lover, I've researched many different breeds and I've begun to realize that you can tell a lot about a person by what breed of dog they choose to associate with. A bit self-conscious about your cellulite? A guy with a shar-pei is for you. They're hard to find, but cheaper than lipo."THE BEAUTY OF MENOPAUSE?"I guess I just have to accept the fact that I'm going to end up a bald, fat, sweaty, irritable woman with a dry vagina and a full beard who never sleeps and has memory loss so I won't even be able to remember how hot I used to look!"STEPPARENTHOOD?"My mother used to tell me 'you can't buy your kids' love.' Bullshit. You can, and it's exponential. They're like Russian mail-order brides -- the more you spend, the more they love you." WHAT WOULD SUSIE SAY? is Essman's irreverent, refreshingly candid, and hilarious retort to the dubious facts of life that we all face.

    One of Britain's most enduring and famous comedians tells us in his own inimitable style the fascinating and often hilarious story of his life. From disclosures of very painful personal tragedies to extraordinary and outrageously funny anecdotes about the stars he knew, his confessions are blisteringly honest, touching - and often shocking. Crying With Laughter combines heartache with hilarity, sexy showbiz revelations with genuinely moving tales of the hard times, and typically funny jokes with sobering personal reflections, to create a passionate, witty and sparkling account of an extraordinary man's extraordinary life.