This second book tells of the first two years that she owned her own barge, the Vereeniging, and how she converts it from an empty hull into a home. Told with with Valerie's usual tongue-in-cheek humour, Harbour Ways can be read as a stand alone memoir or as the follow on to Watery Ways.

    to a major scandal, they are desperate to show they’ve reformed. Who better to present their redemption to the world than a country vicar with a reputation for being annoyingly good? Reverend Tom Goodman is ousted from his job as a country vicar for allowing a homeless family to stay in the church hall. Meanwhile, a major bank is trying to rescue its image after the latest in a long string of financial scandals. It seems like the perfect match and Goodman is hastily appointed as the bank’s new C.E.O. All they have to do now, is promote him as the new face of Shadeys Bank whilst at the same time, keeping him away from the day-to-day business of dubious banking. However, Tom Goodman has other ideas. He’s not going to be satisfied with being used as an empty puppet for a PR stunt. Unfortunately for Shadeys, Tom is planning on actually making a difference. And so begins an epic battle of wills. The might of a multi-billion pound bank versus a seemingly naïve country vicar. No contest. “Yes Minister meets The Vicar of Dibley.”

    

    Enjoy! It should have been the perfect vacation. A beautiful island without a soul in sight. Blue sea so clear I can see the reef. Palm trees swaying in the wind, and a girl with barely a scrap of clothing on. There is only one problem. She is a zombie and she wants to eat me. That's right. My only companion is a creature with a hunger for human flesh. I should bash in her brains and toss her in the ocean but I don't have a volleyball to talk to. All I have is this diary and my own Zombie-Wilson.

     Alexander Muir, a once-renowned professional fighter, has spent the last six years surviving the only way he knows how: on his own. In a land where the golden rule is to make allies or die, he has stayed alive against all odds. But now, his self-imposed exile is over. In other parts of the world, those who survived the Outbreak have banded together to form militant groups with a single mission: to reclaim what is theirs. One intrepid band, the Third Colorado Volunteer Militia, has decided to challenge a place where even the bravest fear to tread—Phoenix, Arizona. And now, these two worlds—the barren isolation of a lone survivor and the emerging force of a fledgling government—are set to collide. Together, they will take on a challenge bigger than all of them. But in this fight, the dead are not the only danger… Also by James N. Cook: Surviving the Dead Series: No Easy Hope This Shattered Land Warrior Within Fire in Winter The Passenger The Darkest Place Savages The Killing Line Storm of Ghosts

    Their mission: hunt down and destroy the real William Shatner. Featuring: Captain Kirk, TJ Hooker, Denny Crane, Priceline Shatner, Cartoon Kirk, Rescue 9-1-1 Shatner, singer Shatner, and many more. No costumed con-goer will be spared in their wave of destruction, no red shirt will make it out alive, and not even the Klingons will be able to stand up to a deranged Captain Kirk with a light saber. But these Shatner- clones are about to learn a hard lesson . . . that the real William Shatner doesn't take crap from anybody. Not even himself.

    

     Centuries ago, when Earth's Darkfolk -- vampires, werewolves, witches and other creatures -- were threatened by humanity, they departed our planet's dimension and journeyed to a shadowy realm, where they built the great city of Necropolis. Matthew Adrion is an Earth cop who came through a portal to Necropolis on a case, died, and was resurrected as a zombie. Unable to return home, he works as a private investigator on the very mean streets of this shadowy, dark city.

    Intelligence is a universal disease, but never fear... Rotten Little Animals just may be the cure we've been praying for." - Cody Goodfellow, author of Radiant Dawn and Silent Weapons For Quiet Wars. "Looney Tunes amped up on cocaine, sex and soft, silky fur and feathers. Shamel's debut is wildly entertaining and destined to become an instant bizarro classic." - Gina Ranalli "This book has three of my favorites things: Kittens, Zombies, and Snuff Films." - Jeff Burk "It begins as a zombie film, transforms into a deranged puppet show, and ends with a car chase. If you ever wondered what a Pixar exploitation film would be like, you need Rotten Little Animals." - Cameron Pierce "Written with the humor of Adult Swim, but with enough psychological profundity to matter. Shamel is a bright motherfucker!" - Forrest Armstrong Animals are people too! And that is messed up. So they have independent cinema. See what happens when an animal film crew kidnap a human boy and make a movie of the abduction. Read things about Nature that just aren't natural. Fear your pets from this day forward. With zombie-cat attacks, gun-blasting massacres, drugged-out puppet shows, exploding car chases, camera-chickens, bat acrobats, wild sex, martini parties and torture-ROTTEN LITTLE ANIMALS is a crazy ride through the underground animal film scene and on to the Big Time.

    Able to lay her own tracks, as well as pick them up again, the train is a marvelous feat of engineering, and as an unbound entity she can travel anywhere her master desires. The only trouble is the trouble she attracts. Her owner and creator, one Professor Hieronymus J. Dittmeyer, can’t seem to help but catch the attention of all manner of odd characters, including an undead conductor and a ghostly guardian. But even the most well intending ghost just isn't enough to keep trouble from the tracks. From run of the mill outlaws, to world-class super villains, the crew of the Sleipnir needs hands-on protecting and they need it fast!Enter Rodger Dodger, dead-eye marksman and all around vexed soul. Dodger finds he is inexplicably drawn to the Sleipnir and her crazy crew, though he is reluctant to return to the work of a gunslinger after a dreadful history of bloodshed and violence. At the request of a restless spirit, Dodger takes on the work, straps on the biggest guns this side of the Mississippi and soon finds his life will never be the same again. (Which is just fine with him because he didn't like the one he had anyways.)On a train that can go anywhere, anything is bound to happen!

    Jim Pike, the disillusioned manager of a hotel that is hosting a Star Trek convention, finds himself leading a ragtag crew of survivors as a strange virus turns the convention-goers into zombies...

    Cooper led thirty-six high school seniors on a spring vacation jaunt from Los Angeles to the desert near Quartzsite, Arizona. No student could earn the privilege of going on the Quartzsite Trip; it was given, and P.J. Cooper gave it. No activities were planned; they happened, and P.J. Cooper made them happen. What few rules there were were also P.J.'s and he enforced them with a whim of iron. In William Hogan's utterly delightful novel, the Quartzsite Trip turns out to be an utterly memorable experience.Here, the lion lies down with the lamb, the merciful find mercy, and the meek inherit the earth. Here, the tables are turned, and as they turn we meet a riotous and endearing cast of characters -- among them Deeter Moss, secret cowboy and closet Dodgers expert, who never talked to anybody before he went on the Quartzsite Trip; Margaret Ball, whose moonlit face displayed what pimples hid; Mary Allbright, who had a very secret fear and who, on the Quartzsite Trip, came up with a very secret plan to resolve it; and P.J. Cooper himself, the best teacher anyone ever had, who gave extra credit for Winnie the Pooh and The Catcher in the Rye and who discovered, in 1962, that the Great Equalizer makes rules too.[From the book jacket]

    During the opening engagements of the 2003 invasion of Iraq, a platoon of U.S. soldiers disappears. The Army attributes this disappearance to the "fog of war," and the subsequent investigation into the disappearance fails to locate even a single body or destroyed vehicle. Six years later, two soldiers on a routine search for "weapons of mass destruction" locate a cave with the remains of one of the missing soldiers and his journal. Unfortunately, Captain Henderson and Specialist Densler find out all too soon that what happened to the "Lost Platoon" is also happening to them. Trapped, they must confront this unspeakable menace, or risk suffering the same fate as that of the soldier in the cave. "Bryon Morrigan's first novel, THE DESERT, is everything you hope to find in a first novel and then some. An original plot, solid characterization and a refreshing change of pace from the standard chains rattling in the attic. A fine mesh of horror and military drama that I can't recommend enough." -James A. Moore, author of BLOOD RED & HARVEST MOON "The Desert by Bryon Morrigan is a weird and wild novel of men againt monsters. In the grand tradition of James Cameron's Aliens, Bryon Morrigan gives a whipcrack tale of U.S. soldiers pitted against the very forces of Hell. It's fun, fast-paced, and deliciously creepy." -Jonathan Maberry, Bram Stoker Award-winning author of GHOST ROAD BLUES & BAD MOON RISING

    She was wrong. The first time Norwich’s most hapless food inspector, Emily Underwood meets butcher Frank Pinch, he’s not got much at all in his display counters. But what he does have is a rather unusual plan to restock his shelves. The next time they bump into each other, he’s won an award for his sausages but is running out of meat.Can Frank keep up production of his unusually tasty sausages? Will Emily discover the source of Frank’s award wining meat? And what will happen the next time she tries to inspect his butchers shop? Book 1 in the Rub-a-Dub trilogy, this deliciously British dark comedy will change the way you look at sausages forever.